Before you all read this I just want to warn you that not everything will be solved this chapter. I think Jane shooting herself leaves others a lot to deal with, but I promise not to drag it out too long!

I really hope you all will enjoy this! Thanks so much for reading! -J

Chapter 13- After the Gun Goes Bang, Bang, Bang- Part 2

She can feel Maura's hand on her back as Bobby grabs her arm to pull her with him; can feel as her girlfriend tries to grasp her arm, trying to keep her with her. Needing to ensure Frankie and Maura's safety she didn't fight, chancing one more glance at Maura, trying to convey her feelings with just one look, wanting her to know that it would be okay; wanting her to know that she would make sure she got home to Amelia.

It wasn't until they were outside, standing in front of a sea of police officers holding up their guns at them that she began to struggle against Bobby's grip.

"Shoot him," She screamed at Korsak and Frost, needing someone to get to her brother; needing someone to make sure that Maura was okay. "Frankie needs help…Maura…Just shoot him!"

Watching as her fellow officers struggled to find a clear shot without taking her out she began to panic, knowing her brother didn't have much time, that he needed a hospital. Fighting with everything she had she began to realize that her options were limited. She needed someone to get her brother out of the morgue. She needed someone to make sure Maura made it home to her daughter. Looking at the officers around her she realized that she had to be the one to make all that possible.

Grabbing Bobby's gun hand Jane began to force his hand, not away from her but towards her stomach, seeing no other way out of the situation as she pointed the gun at herself, her whole arm shaking with the effort as she pulled the trigger, just as someone called her name. Bobby's grip on her finally loosened as the bullet travelled through her and into the dirty cop, both of them falling to the ground as she continued to hear her name being called, wishing she could get to the voice; willing herself to just get to the voice as pain pulsed throughout her body.

"Jane, Jane, Jane, Jane….no….Jane," she continued to hear, her eyesight coming in and out of focus making it impossible to identify the body in front of her, but knowing the voice; recognizing it with a longing in her heart.

"Maura."

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The first thing Maura registered as she woke up in Jane's hospital room was the pain in her neck from sleeping at such an odd angle, wishing she had taken that nurse up on her offer to find her a cot. Rubbing the back of her neck, the Doctor looked around the room sleepily, unsure what had woken her up as Angela had not returned from Frankie's room next door. Debating putting her head back down, unsure if she could really get back to sleep, a movement out of the corner of her eye caught her attention.

"Jane?" Maura whispered hopefully, swearing she saw Jane's hand move, reaching out and grasping onto her girlfriend. "Jane? Can you hear me?"

"M….Mau….Maur…." Jane mumbled, her eyes fluttering while her face scrunched up like she was in pain. "Maur…no…shoo...shoot him….just….shoot him," she continued to mumble, obviously caught in some sort of dream.

"Jane, honey it's okay," Maura soothed, running her hand over the brunette's hair. "Wake up Sweetie. It's okay. You're safe now."

"Maur…Maura," Jane's eyes flew open, her breathing heavy as her eyes quickly scanned the room, looking as if she was about to panic until her gaze fell on a pair of hazel eyes. "What…where….Frankie…."

"It's okay," Maura assured her, placing a hand on one of Jane's shoulders, encouraging her to lie back against the pillows as she attempted to sit up before grabbing her glass of water, offering her a sip. "It's okay; Frankie's okay. He's in the room next door. Your Mother is with him," she explained calmly, watching as Jane's breathing began to slow. "He woke up last night. He's going to be just fine."

"M-Mia," Jane then mumbled, her eyes looking around as if searching for the little blonde.

"Is at home with Barry," Maura replied, having talked to the four-year-old the previous evening, promising she would be home sometime in the morning, unable to bring herself to leave the hospital before Jane woke up; grateful for Korsak who had offered to go get her a change of clothes. "I didn't want her to come until we knew...I didn't want her to come here yesterday."

"I…I don't want her to see me like this," Jane said weakly, placing a hand over her abdomen where Maura knew the bullet had gone through. "I don't…want to scare her. I'm…I…"

"It's okay," Maura replied, squeezing Jane's arm. "It's alright Jane. I understand. It's alright," she assured her, her thumb rubbing small, soothing circles on her arm. "How are you feeling? Are you okay?"

"I feel…like I shot myself," Jane replied, not missing the way that Maura's face quickly fell, her hand leaving Jane's arm. "Maura I'm so sorry," she whispered, wanting to reach out and take the blonde's hand, but resisting since she was unsure how she would react. "I'm so sorry. I didn't….I just needed them to get to you and Frankie. I couldn't let…I didn't know what else to do Maur. I'm so sorry."

"I…" Maura paused feeling the fear she felt the previous day return to her body as her mind flashed back to watching Jane fall to the ground; to the feeling of blood seeping through her fingers. "I should go tell Angela you're awake," she said instead, suddenly getting to her feet, needing to create some space. "And I…I need to go check on Amelia. She was worried. I should be with her."

"Maura," Jane tried to reach out for the blonde, hating the fear she could see in her hazel eyes. "Maur please."

"I'll come back later," Maura said once she was at the door, hoping that Jane couldn't see her hands shaking. "As soon as I can. I promise," she said, not waiting for a reply before she was out the door.

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Maura felt numb the entire drive home. She was happy Jane was awake; relieved to see her girlfriend's brown eyes open, to hear her voice again, and yet her first instinct had been to get away. Maura knew it was her fear, which caused her to bolt from the hospital and as guilty as she felt about it she could not bring herself to turn back and return to Jane's bedside.

This was why she worked with the dead. With the dead she didn't have to worry about feelings or insecurities. There was no need to fear what they would think and they didn't have any expectations. She knew she was being a coward walking away from Jane. She knew she was taking the easy way out by simply returning home but she saw no other way.

Getting to the house the Doctor quietly let herself in; unsure if Frost and Amelia would be awake yet, peaking into the kitchen to find her daughter sitting at the island eating a bowl of cereal while a very tired looking Frost leaned against the counter nursing a cup of coffee. Though she hadn't made a noise, Frost looked up, giving the blonde a small smile.

"Hey Doc," He greeted, causing Amelia to quickly spin around in her chair.

"Mommy!" Amelia called, jumping off the stool and immediately running into her Mother's arms where she was quickly lifted up so she could wrap her limbs around Maura. "Mommy I missed you so much."

"I missed you too Sweet girl," Maura replied, fighting back the tears she could feel stinging at her eyes as she held the four-year-old close. "Were you a good girl for Barry?"

"I was a very good girl!" Amelia nodded seriously, threading her fingers in her mother's hair. "Right Mr. Frosty?"

"You got that right Mia," Frost agreed, not missing the smirk on Maura's face at her daughter's nickname for him. "She was very well behaved. We had a good night," he said, not mentioning the fact that the little blonde had him up at 5:30am.

"Mommy where is Angela and Janie?" Amelia asked, leaning back to look at her Mother better, obviously concerned.

"Well Honey, Angela is visiting Frankie," Maura replied, leaving out the part about Frankie being in the hospital. "And Jane isn't able to come visit right now, which is why Barry stayed with you last night, but don't worry you'll get to see Jane again soon," she assured her. "Now how about you do me a favour and be a big girl and go upstairs and get your uniform on for school okay? Do you think you can do that?"

"Okay Mommy," Amelia nodded, giving the older blonde a kiss on the cheek before she was returned to the ground.

Waiting until he could hear Amelia's feet on the stairs, Frost made his way over to Maura, watching as the Doctor's expression went from happy to worried as soon as the little girl was out of sight. "How is she?" He asked, having received an update on Frankie the night before.

"She's awake," Maura replied, moving to take a seat at the island, suddenly feeling like her legs wouldn't hold her up anymore. "She's in pain obviously but she's okay. Mostly just worried about Frankie."

"Of course," Frost nodded, knowing how his partner was. "Did she say anything about what happened? I mean I know she was freaked out and it wasn't looking great with Bobby but…I mean what was she thinking?"

"She said she just wanted to make sure someone could get to me and Frankie," Maura shrugged. "She didn't know that Swat had already gotten to us. She didn't think she had any other choice," she practically recited sounding a bit robotic as she obviously tried to keep her emotions at bay.

"Hey, you okay?" Frost asked, reaching out and placing his hand over Maura's, seeing the sadness in the Doctor's eyes.

"Yes of course just…well…I'm not really sure," Maura admitted, unable to explain what she was currently feeling.

"That makes sense," Frost nodded. "Yesterday was nuts with everything that went down. It makes sense that you would be upset you know. But I hope you know I'm here for you Doc; whatever you need," he said, earning a small smile from Maura, who was fighting back tears. "Look Cavanaugh gave us a few days off after everything. I need to run home and grab some stuff and I'd really like to go see Jane and Frankie, but I'd be happy to come back and help out with Amelia later if you want to be with Jane. I mean I could pick her up from school and what not."

"Oh Barry I can't ask you to do that," Maura shook her head.

"You didn't ask I offered," Frost replied. "Come on Doc let me help you out, I'm happy to do it. Mia's a cool kid. Please?"

"That would be great Barry," Maura eventually relented, unable to argue with the smiling Detective. "Thank you."

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"She hates me Frost," Jane told her partner three days later, still lying in her hospital bed with Frost by her side.

"Who? Maura?"

"Yeah Maura," Jane nodded. "Who else?"

"What do you mean she hates you Jane? How can you think that?" Frost asked, raising an eyebrow in disbelief. "Maura has been here with you every day. She only goes home to sleep, and that's just for Amelia's sake. Doesn't really seem like she hates you to me."

"She might be here physically but emotionally she's somewhere else completely," Jane sighed, pushing her hair out of her face in frustration, glad to finally be able to talk to someone about her strained relationship with Maura, who had been forced to leave the hospital to stop at work for a few hours. "She barely talks to me anymore, she flinches anytime I touch her and she's basically treating me like a patient. I completely screwed everything up."

"Aw come on Jane it can't be that bad," Frost tried to assure her even though he had noticed the Doctor's odd behaviour with everyone besides her daughter. "She's just trying to deal with everything. You gotta remember she had to watch you shoot yourself. She was the first one to get to you after; it was a lot," he explained. "She cares about you Jane…so much. Just give her some time."

"I just don't want this to be the end of us already Frost," Jane leaning her head back so she was looking up at the ceiling. "I wouldn't be able to handle it if that was all I ever got with her. I mean her and Mia they're…I…I need them in my life. She's gotta understand that I was just…."

"You were just what?" Frost asked when it seemed like Jane wasn't going to finish her sentence.

"I wasn't just worried about Frankie, Frost," Jane said, sounding slightly defeated. "I mean sure I needed to make sure someone got to him so that he could get help but I was worried about Maura too," she explained. "Maura is all Amelia has. I couldn't let anything happen to her. I had to make sure that she got home safely…that she made it home to that little girl. That's what was important. She just needed to make it home."

Nodding, Frost understood what his partner meant. She was looking out for Amelia and Maura in the only way she knew how, but he also understood Maura's hesitation and fear in the whole thing as well. "Have you told Maura all that?"

"She won't listen," Jane shook her head sadly. "Anytime I bring it up she just changes the subject or finds a reason to leave the room. She won't hear any of it. It's like she'd rather just pretend it didn't even happen."

"Look Jane," Frost sighed, wanting to help both Jane and Maura through this time. "I've been around Maura these last few days and I think you just need to give her some more time to process this," he suggested. "She's still coming to see you every day; that's a good sign. Just…I don't know…let her come to you about it. I think that's the best thing you can do right now. She'll come around."

"I hope you're right Frost," Jane replied, looking her partner in the eyes. "Because I don't know what I would do if you aren't."

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On the fifth day of Jane's hospital stay, Maura returned home late in the afternoon to the sound of Amelia running down the stairs calling for her excitedly. As the little blonde came into view Maura watched as the excitement instantly faded as Amelia's face fell and she immediately burst into tears, dropping to the floor.

Surprised by the outburst, Maura was frozen in place for a moment, not having seen her daughter throw a tantrum since she was 2. "Amelia, sweetheart, what is it?" Maura finally kicked into action, falling to her knees beside her daughter and immediately pulling the sobbing girl to her chest, waving Frost away when he rounded the corner to see what was going on. "Oh honey don't cry. What's wrong? What happened?"

"Janie…doesn't….love me….anymore," Amelia replied between sobs, her tears soaking into her Mother's sweater.

"What? Sweetie no! Why would you say that?" Maura asked rubbing her hand up and down her daughter's back trying to sooth her. "Of course Janie loves you. She does."

"Then where…is…she?" Amelia asked, leaning back to look at Maura, tears still running down her cheeks.

Biting her lip Maura knew she wouldn't be able to lie. For the last five days she had gotten away with explaining that Jane wasn't able to visit, but with Amelia now directly asking where Jane was she knew she could no longer withhold the truth from her little girl.

"Listen to me okay?" Maura said taking Amelia's chin in her hand and looking her in the eyes, making sure the little blonde was hearing her. "Jane got hurt at work. She's okay now but she's in the hospital, which is why she couldn't visit you. But she's really okay honey," she said, using her thumb to brush away a few tears. "She's okay and she misses you so much. She'll be home soon."

"I want to see her," Amelia said, pulling away from Maura and standing back up. "I wanna go to see her. If Janie's hurt she needs me Mommy."

"I know you want to see Janie sweet girl but I think it would be better if you waited until Jane was out of the hospital," Maura replied, watching as Amelia wiped at her own tears in frustration. "It will only be a few more days okay? Once she's home I'll take you to see her."

"No!" Amelia stomped her foot on the ground, surprising Maura who jumped back slightly. "I want to see her now," she said, the tears running down her cheeks seeming to have no end.

"Amelia…" Maura began to argue, watching as the four-year-old's face practically crumbled before her eyes.

"Please Mommy," she sobbed, once again wrapping her little arms around her neck. "P-p-please."

Hating seeing her daughter so sad, Maura's resolve began to fade, wanting to protect the little girl from having to see Jane so hurt, but unable to keep her from the one person whom she knew would be able to make her feel better. "Okay sweet girl, okay," Maura whispered, placing a kiss in Amelia's hair. "We'll go see Jane. It's okay baby. It's okay," she continued to coo; standing up with the little girl in her arms, holding her tightly. "I'll take you to Janie. It's okay."

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Half an hour later Maura stood outside Jane's hospital room, taking a deep breath as she looked down at Amelia who stood in front of her with big, questioning eyes that were red-rimmed from crying. It wasn't until they were halfway to the hospital that Amelia's cried had finally subsided, reduced to mere sniffles as she listened to Maura explain how careful they needed to be when they saw Jane.

"Now remember what I told you okay? You need to be very careful with Jane," Maura reminded the little blonde. "She may not say it but she's in quite a bit of pain so we don't want to hurt her okay?"

"Okay Mommy," Amelia nodded obediently, reaching out for Maura's hand.

Pushing the door open, Maura stuck her head in, grateful to find that Jane was sitting up in bed reading a magazine, looking rather close to her normal self as her face lit up at the sight of her girlfriend.

"Hey! I didn't expect you back so soon," Jane said, her face falling only slightly when she noticed Amelia at Maura's side; the little girl looking nervous as she clung close to her mother. "M-Mia," she stuttered, fixing a big smile on her face. "Hi Sweetheart," she said carefully. "How you doing Bug? I've missed you."

"M-Mommy said you got hurt," Amelia practically whispered, still glued to Maura's side.

"I did," Jane nodded as Maura brought Amelia closer. "But I'm okay now," she assured her, hating that the blonde looked as nervous as she did on the day they met. "Come here. You wanna come see me?" She then asked, watching as Amelia nodded before tears began to rapidly fall down her face. "Oh Bug, don't cry," she said, wishing her gunshot wound wasn't preventing her from simply picking the little girl up. "Maur could you?" She gestured towards the bed.

Understanding, Maura lifted Amelia up onto the bed beside Jane, the four-year-old too afraid to make a move, as Jane wrapped her up in her arms. "It's okay Sweetheart. I'm okay," she soothed, grateful when little arms carefully wrapped themselves around her. "It's okay. Please don't cry."

"I'm sorry Jane," Maura finally spoke, as Amelia continued to cry into Jane's hospital gown. "I know you didn't want her to see you here but she was inconsolable. I didn't know what else to do…she needed to see you and I…"

"It's okay," Jane interrupted, shaking her head, as she rubbed Amelia's back. "I…I think I needed to see her too."

It was nearly ten minutes before Amelia's cries finally quieted down, Maura peeking over Jane's arm to see that the four-year-old's breathing had evened out and her eyes were closed.

"I think she's out cold," Jane chuckled, running her fingers through blonde locks.

"She hasn't been getting much sleep," Maura admitted, having shared her bed with her daughter for the last few nights. "Neither one of us has. She was worried because you weren't coming over…I wasn't sure how to explain it all to her."

"I'm sorry," Jane shook her head. "I shouldn't have asked you not to bring her," she sighed. "I was just worried it would scare her and I didn't think. I never imagined she would be so upset."

"It's okay," Maura assured her. "I thought keeping her from here was for the best as well. I guess we were both wrong," she shrugged, her eyes meeting Jane's for a brief moment before she quickly looked away, busying herself with playing with a loose strand on Jane's blanket. "Have you heard anything about when you might be released?"

"Doc says I should be good to go in a few days time as long as I promise to take it easy," Jane replied. "And she thinks it would be best if I stay with someone for the first little bit."

"Well that makes sense," Maura nodded in understanding. "You're likely to have a difficult time getting around for a while. You can stay with Me and Amelia."

"Are…are you sure about that?" Jane asked, raising an eyebrow in surprise.

"Of course I'm sure," Maura furrowed her brow. "Why wouldn't I be? It makes the most sense considering your Mother lives in my guesthouse and I would the best equipped to assist you with your medical needs," she continued. "Plus we're dating, so my house would be the obvious choice."

"Yeah but I thought you were still mad at me," Jane said, straight to the point, not quite understanding Maura's logic, though she immediately felt relieved to hear that they were still in fact a couple.

"I'm not mad at you Jane," Maura shook her head with a sigh, having told the brunette this several times over the past few days.

"Are you sure about that?" Jane asked. "Because seriously Maur, it's okay if you are. I mean you've been acting differently and if you want to talk about it…"

"I'm fine," Maura interrupted, the look on her face warning Jane that the conversation needed to be put to an end, as she was obviously not yet ready to talk about it.

Remembering what Frost told her, Jane sighed, deciding that maybe her partner was right, maybe the best thing she could do right now was give Maura time to process. Grateful that Maura was still at least willing to be in her presence, Jane figured it would be in her best interest to allow her girlfriend to be the one to care for her when she was released from the hospital, hoping that at some point during their time living together the Medical Examiner would eventually open up.

"It uh…it would be great if I could stay with you," Jane said, turning her head to place a kiss in Amelia's hair. "Thank you."

"Of course," Maura nodded, giving the brunette a small smile that didn't quite reach her eyes, watching as Jane got herself comfortable with Amelia still in her arms; brown eyes eventually drifting shut while Maura sat back in her chair, resigning herself to watching the two most important people in her life sleep for the night.