Trying To Remember

Alfred was lying in his hospital bed. He was in the same position he had been in all week with the same thoughts swirling through his head. All he could think about was the emerald-eyed Brit that had visited him on the first day that he'd woken up, claiming to be his boyfriend. It wasn't possible. It simply wasn't possible. Alfred didn't know any British people and Alfred wasn't even sure of his sexuality, so he doubted that he would have ever entered an openly gay relationship with the Brit. Whilst that appeared to be the least of the American's troubles he still couldn't help but think about it. He thought that the Brit was attractive; he'll admit that he thought those enchanting emerald eyes seemed to shine like they had a life of their own. His accent was extremely pleasant. It made Alfred tingle all over when he thought of Arthur whispering sweet nothings to him in that seductive tone that he would and his body was nice too. Not as well built as Alfred's but it was nice to look at. However, Alfred constantly tried to push all thoughts of Arthur out of his mind. Alfred needed to focus on the problem at hand, and the problem was that according to the doctor Alfred had lost his memory. He couldn't remember anything from the last five years. In Alfred's mind he was fourteen and still living in America; his twin had decided to live with him for a year. This made Alfred understand why he had been shocked to see that his body had changed overnight; the simple explanation was that it hadn't. Alfred had just lost his memory due to the impact of the crash. Alfred tried to remember that night, but he couldn't. All he could remember was rain, a car speeding towards him and complete darkness. Alfred shuddered at the distant memory and pulled his covers up, his arms now covered with gosebumps. He glanced at the clock; it was 6:00PM. Mattie should be here soon, Alfred thought.

When Matthew had first visited Alfred, Alfred had felt the sense of comfort that he had needed. Matthew hadn't changed a bit, he still looked exactly the same and Alfred had been grateful for that. Matthew informed Alfred that they had moved to Britain with their mother when they were fifteen. Alfred had been shocked to hear that his brother had come out as gay; it had almost made Alfred admit his own sexuality-almost. Not that it mattered anyway as apparently Alfred had followed in Matthew's footsteps and had emerged from the figurative closet at the age of sixteen and had entered a gay relationship with Arthur at seventeen. This was something that Alfred wasn't inclined to believe, but at the same time Alfred wanted to believe it. He wanted to believe that he had been strong enough to come out and he also wanted to believe that the charming British stranger he so often thought about had once been his.

Alfred was snapped out of his thoughts by the sound of the door to his room opening. His brother Matthew entered, timid as usual but smiling all the same.

"Hey, Alfred. How are you doing?" Alfred noticed that Matthew was holding some roses and some chocolate. Matthew placed them on the table in front of Alfred and sat down.

Alfred grinned, "Aw, that's nice of you Mattie. Honestly, you shouldn't have, but I appreciate it all the same." Alfred picked up the chocolates and pointed out the front of the box in appreciation. "Quality Street? My favourite. You know me too well, bro."

Matthew looked at Alfred sheepishly and hesitated before speaking. "Actually, they're not from me…" He trailed off so Alfred motioned for his brother to continue. "They're from Arthur. He bought them for you earlier today and wanted me to give them to you, seeing as you refuse to speak to him."

Alfred paused; a toffee was elegantly poised mid-air, on the way to his mouth. "Arthur bought me these?"

Alfred ate the toffee whilst watching his twin brother, who was smiling, as if there had been a private joke that Alfred didn't understand.

"Well, I certainly didn't buy them for you."

Matthew held the flowers and sighed. His smile disappeared and Alfred became nervous, unsure of what Matthew was going to say next. "He loves you, Alfred. He really does. Arthur loves you with all his heart. You mean so much to him. He used to tell you that every day." Matthew smiled nostalgically and rolled his eyes. "God knows he told me about it enough times as well" At that, Matthew chuckled.

Alfred continued to watch his brother; never taking his shiny blue eyes off Matthew's face. Matthew turned around so that he was face-to-face with Alfred. "Please let him talk to you, Alfred. Just listen to him. You two were perfect together, are perfect together and I don't want you guys to lose that. Arthur's heartbroken, he thinks it's the end; he won't want to go on without you, Al." As Alfred hesitated, his brother took his hand, his eyes were pleading. "Please, just see him."

Alfred was surprised to see that tears were brimming in Matthew's eyes and he was even more surprised to find that the treacherous tears were beginning to form in his own eyes as well. He hurriedly wiped them away before Matthew could notice. Alfred gathered up his courage and nodded. "Okay, I'll see him."

Matthew then sprung off Alfred's bed, a smile stretched across his angelic face once more. " It was a good job that worked because he's standing outside in the lobby."

Without waiting for a response Matthew dashed out into the lobby, leaving an astonished Alfred behind.

Arthur had been anxiously pacing the lobby. This time last week his heart had been broken by his oblivious boyfriend who hadn't recognised him and had rejected him. Arthur didn't want the same thing to happen again, but he just had to see Alfred. Those few minutes in Alfred's company were worth the pain and the heartbreak. Arthur lost his train of thought as someone careered into him; knocking him over. Without thinking Arthur automatically chastised the culprit. "Damnit, Alfred! Can you please just watch where you're going?"

Arthur covered his mouth and felt his heart shatter. He hadn't meant to say Alfred. It had just been a reflex thing since Alfred was so accident-prone. He looked to find Matthew standing there, hand outstretched to help the Brit up. "Thanks Matthew, sorry about that. What's wrong?"

Matthew stood there red-faced and panting. Alarms bells began ringing in Arthur's mind. Was there something wrong with Alfred? "Alfred wants to…" He stopped talking to gain some breath. "See you." Arthur raised his eyebrows in surprise. He took off in the direction Matthew had come from, leaving the Canadian alone in the lobby.

Hesitantly, Arthur pushed open the hospital room door to see Alfred sitting up; looking considerably healthier than he had the last time Arthur had saw him. "Hey, Arthur." The American was sheepish as he gestured towards an empty chair. "Don't just stand there, come and sit down."

Arthur closed the door and sat down in the chair that was opposite Alfred's bed. "Alfred you're looking well, love."

He clamped his hand over his mouth again, "love" was Alfred's pet name and one of Arthur's habits, so it was another reflex remark. Arthur turned red, suddenly embarrassed and sure that he'd managed to mess it up already. He looked at Alfred to see that he was actually smiling.

"Don't sweat it, dude. It's totally fine. I understand." He still sounded uncertain but Arthur knew he was trying. Alfred paused, as if trying to remember what the Brit had said. "Oh! Yeah, yeah, I'm much better thanks; my memory is still gone which sucks." He tapped his head with his index finger.

"They actually just told me that I can go home!" Alfred's grin seemed to falter, as if he'd just thought of something depressing. "The thing is," he scratched awkwardly at his neck. "I don't know where home is…" Alfred trailed off, and looked at the Brit.

Arthur inhaled sharply, how was he going to explain that Alfred lived with him, the boyfriend that he had completely forgotten? He cleared his throat and he began to speak. "Alfred, actually I know where your home is. It's with me. We-we have an apartment together, in Central London."

Arthur watched Alfred closely; he didn't think that Alfred's eyes could possibly get any wider than they were now. "We live together? Whoa, so I actually did come out? Whoa, that's massive. So, what now? Do you want me to stay with Mattie until my memory comes back or…?" He bashfully trailed off, leaving the unspoken part of that sentence hanging in the air.

Arthur smiled; it was obvious that the American didn't hate him. In fact it looked like Alfred wanted to remember and the Brit was more than willing to help him. "Don't be silly, you can come home to the apartment if you want."

Alfred's face had gone a tint of red and he suddenly remembered that fourteen year old Alfred would have been a virgin and that he may be uncomfortable by the close proximity their shared bed forced them to have. "Don't worry, there's a guest room. I'll sleep in there."

Alfred seemed happy by the fact that he was going to stay in the apartment with Arthur, after all maybe that would trigger some memories. Arthur smiled again, enjoying the pleased but dazed expression on Alfred's face. Taking his opportunity, the Brit leaned over and placed a kiss on Alfred's forehead- a sign of affection, not lust. Arthur helped the American who was now blushing, onto his feet and linked arms with him, helping him up.

Alfred turned to the Brit and smiled. "Okay, let's go home."

The pair waited for a cab to their apartment, both hoping that the trip back would make Alfred remember.

A/N: Ahh, I'm sooo sorry I haven't updated sooner, my laptop broke so I've been unable to access my account and submit this! *sigh*

Anyway, that's chapter two done, I hope you enjoyed reading it!

Please follow, favourite and review :')

Ciao for now!
~BooksAreLikeChocolateButBetter