So I'm super sorry this is coming to you guys so late, I've just got a lot on my plate between school and all my other writing.

Hope you enjoy, and PLEASE give me some feedback. I'm not really all that sure what people think of this yet :(

I woke up the next morning to the sound of trickling water and sunlight warming the side of my face, immediately confused as to where I was. My cabin certainly didn't have sunlight (no windows, just the creepy Greek Fire torches), nor did it have peacefully trickling fountains.

I cracked my eyes open, squinting in the bright white light as faintly glowing walls and rows of bunks with flowing white sheets came into view. The Poseidon cabin? What was I doing here?

Oh, right, I thought to myself, everything from the previous night flooding back through my still sleep-foggy brain.

I shifted my head slightly on the squishy mattress, realizing just how close I was to the older teen. He really did look adorable when he was sleeping, his dark hair all rumpled and his face placid and calm. I just wanted to stay here for a few more minutes, watching him, but I sorta realized that was weird. Too Twilight-y for my taste.

Straightening myself out slowly and hissing at the pain in my stiffened neck, I vaguely realized my own hand was still loosely wrapped around Percy's, and I jerked my hand back suddenly, eyes widening at the prolonged contact. Definitely not something I was used to. Watching him sleep, being close to him? Fine. But touching...not really fine.

The son of Poseidon stirred from the sudden movement though, twisting under the already disheveled white sheets.

"Nico? Is that you?" he mumbled sleepily, stretching and burying his face in his pillow without opening his eyes.

"Uh, yeah. Must've, um, fallen asleep here last night. Sorry...I'll just be going now," I managed to stutter out, raking my hands through my hair like I always did when I was nervous.

"S'okay," Percy replied, voice muffled, "I'll see you later?"

"S-sure," I mumbled quietly, already making my way to the door. I didn't really have the heart to tell him that I was leaving. Yes, I was still leaving, I had to...

I slipped out of Cabin 3 quickly and quietly, thankful that we'd both woken up late and that most people were already at the dining pavilion. The less people to see me, the better. I was leaving, whatever happened last night didn't matter. I still had to leave, there was no getting around the fact that Percy was never going to care the way I cared about him.

When I got back to my cabin (lucky #13), I immediately collapsed on my bed, not even because I was tired. Last night had probably been the best night's sleep I'd gotten in months, and I'm sure Percy would agree too. Perhaps it was something about being close to him...but no. I can't let last night change my mind. I had to move on, my stupid little crush on a guy that was never going to love me back would never get me anywhere in life. He was Percy Jackson, straight as a pole with a gorgeous, loving, absolutely perfect girlfriend.

She was everything to him, she'd always been everything to him, even from the day we first met. I could still remember that bitterly cold night outside Westover Hall. I could still remember the look of distress on Percy's face after Annabeth fell, how he shouted at a goddess (even if he wasn't really aware of her status), but still, the thought counted. He'd left camp without permission, risked everything he had just to save her. He'd held up the sky for her. They'd shared their uber-romantic first kiss under Mt. St. Helens. They were meant for each other, not even the gods could keep them apart.

And even now, while he was broken beyond belief, she stayed. She still loved him, even if he was different, and he obviously still loved her back. He didn't need me and he could never love me anyway, not in any capacity. I'd damaged things too much, blaming him for what happened to Bianca even if it wasn't his fault. I'd carried so much hate around with me, and even after things were "okay" between us, I went and betrayed him time and time again, I couldn't ignore that fact any longer even as I tried to forget those weak moments. It didn't matter how I felt about him now. Even if, by some miracle, he was gay or at least bi, he would never love me. It's a wonder he didn't seem to hate me as much as I'd hated him in the past.

It didn't matter if this one time I'd been able to help him through a nightmare. He would get better with time and with Annabeth. Nightmares were an already common occurrence after all, and it might not have even been about Tartarus in the first place. The dream could have been about anything, demigods go through enough as it is without taking on the pit. They'd fade in intensity sooner or later. He'd be fine.

Regardless of last night, I didn't matter to him. I never could.

Better to force myself to realize that now rather than allow myself to suffer anymore heartache.

I pushed myself out of bed, groaning involuntarily as my stiff muscles, gained through a night of awkward sleeping positions, protested. I fumbled in my bedside drawer for the ambrosia I kept there, downing a square and immediately feeling a rush of relief. I let myself rest for another second before getting up. Time to start packing, I thought to myself somberly, pushing everything related to that damned son of Poseidon out of my mind.

I wasn't really sure what time it was when I heard the knock on my cabin door, probably some time after breakfast. The lack of windows always made time hard to judge, only compounded by my screwed up inner clock and constant jet lag (from my travels to the Underworld and California).

I crossed the room and opened the door, only to find a much taller Percy staring down at me.

"I missed you at breakfast! Where we're you?" he exclaimed in an unusually hoarse voice, and oh my gods I needed him out. I couldn't deal with him anymore, I just wanted to go.

I closed the door in his face, as I'd done so many times before, and sank down to the stone floor in front of the door. I couldn't do this anymore, I couldn't take having him around. He would give me those adorable baby seal eyes and I knew that I would just end up letting him in and I'd miraculously find some reason to stay here.

I expected him to just turn around and accept the hint that maybe I wasn't really in the mood to talk. But, oblivious as he always is, he insisted on banging on the door instead. I felt each vibration.

"Just go away," I moaned loud enough for him to hear. I really couldn't take this anymore.

"Nico! C'mon, please just open up!"

"I said go away," I shouted loader this time.

"Is...is this about what I said a few weeks ago? B-because I didn't mean it, I don't even know why I said that. Seriously, just let me in, I really want to talk to you," he asked. Gods, I could almost see the look on his face.

No, I couldn't let him in.

But...he sounded so sad. Maybe...maybe he was sorry about what he'd said, maybe he wanted to patch things over. Maybe, maybe, maybe. He would probably just kick the door down if I didn't let him in...so what was the point of trying to keep him out.

I got up and turned to the door, placing a shaking hand on the knob. I was going to regret this, right?

Hope you enjoyed and I certainly hope I'll be back around sooner.

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