Chapter 11: Too cute...*bleh*
"LAST TIME ON TOTAL DRAMA: The 4 remaining campers of the show went on to do a trivia about the show, and not random things(You can throw your unoriginality insults in the fan mail, alright?). The questions varied from fear, to past events, from elimination orders, etc; All played a pretty fair game, with Ashura winning invincibility. And in the end, leaving the final four was none other than Isaac himself. At least he's got a new home, and a girlfriend to look forward to!"
-on the dock-
"Now, the competition is coming to an end, with the final 3 campers are competing for the 1 million big ones. The show gets more exciting than ever, with every second proving to be more anticipated than the last. Who will leave taking home third place tonight? You'll have to watch to find out, as we travel through the enthralling Final 3 challenge, right here and right now, on Total...Drama...Island!"
-theme song plays-
-with James-
James was walking around the island, emitting some whistles in the process.
"My god, it feels so roomy with only 3 people here. Then again, it is a pretty big ass island….But, no matter. I've come this far, and I'm not gonna be dragged down now. I'm gonna try with all my heart and soul, and fight tooth and nail if I make it in that finale. The million dollars could actually be mine..."
He let out a couple of breaths, looking at the dirty and somewhat forgotten bracelet. It read 'STAY CALM'. He then chuckled. "At least if I lose, I'll have a happy new stepbrother."
He said as he clenched the bracelet and put it back on his wrist, and continued thinking happy thoughts as he walked down a dirt trail leading to the ceremony grounds. When there, he took a seat.
"Final 3...Lets do this!
-with Amanda-
Amanda was sitting on the cabin porch, looking at the clouds filling the blue sky. "One step closer...one day closer...every second that's passing means I still have a chance...for Emma. Two more people left...you can do this..." She wiped a tear away with her shirt sleeve. "For Emma..."
She got up from the porch steps and walked down the same dirt trail that James went down, albeit a different path.
"Final 3…Lets do this!"
-with Ashura-
Ashura was sitting at the Dock of Shame, looking at the blue sky.
"Ah...serene settings, chirping birds...its all perfect..." He said as put on sunglasses and threw rocks at the chirping birds. "Yeah, perfect enough for me to vomit at. Jesus, this place is a dump. Luckily, I'll be out of here in two days with a million bucks in my possession. Anger Management and that girl who gets freebies don't stand a chance." He said as he let out a laugh.
He then looked at his own reflection in the water. "Final 3...Lets do this!"
Just then, the VOICE dun dun dunnnnnnnn came over the island, similar to an echo of a cannon blast.
"CAMPERS! Report to the Talent Show Arena within 20 minutes! Or...well, I'll think of something! JUST GET HERE!"
"McLame is sounding as desperate as ever..." Amanda muttered as she ran as fast as her legs could carry her to the Mess Hall.
-at the Mess Hall-
Amanda, Ashura, and James had all gotten to the Mess Hall within an island record 4 minutes and 49 seconds.
"Dang, guys, I'm impressed! Why didn't we see this energy in the past episodes?" Chris said as he walked around.
"Fuck you." Ashura said angrily.
"Ooh! Look at Mr. Snappy over here, huh? Well...guess we'll have to put your spirit to the test today! Because, its another Visual Reality challenge!
"Do we even have the budget for that?" Amanda asked Chris.
"Remember episode one, girl? The Super Smash Bros. challenge? We're doing something similar to that. Except, instead of fighting...its a race to the death!"
James gulped. "Thank God this is VR..."
Ashura peeked over at the VR machine and groaned. "With a budget that has enough to get this machine, could you have least gotten an upgrade or two for it?"
"Question the budget again and your auto-eliminated. OK, mister "Tough Guy"?"
"Fine..." Ashura muttered.
"Now, on with the helmets! We have a challenge to do!
The three of them had did with what they were told, and had closed their eyes to transport from reality to fantasy within the blink of an eye.
-in the race room-
James, Ashura and Amanda had all transfered inside the room...to see gray nothingness lie in front of them.
"Um..." James started to say. "If this is a race to the death, where are the fiery floors, and spike walls, and bombs and kazaps?"
"Whats a kazap?" Amanda asked, intrigued.
Ashura sighed and face palmed, looking at the two as if they were mental. "Never give this guy ideas! He can hear 'cliff', and then order us all to jump off of one!"
James rolled his eyes. "Quit worrying! Besides, he wouldn't have gotten this high-tech machine, just so he can ditch the idea and make us all jump off a cliff! Its kinda like making a batch of chocolate-chip cookies, but with no chocolate chips."
Amanda chuckled. "'High-tech'."
"Come again? I mean, I know what you're TRYING to say...but I'm just not catching on." Ashura said, scratching her head.
"What I'm trying to say is, there's no use going through all the time and work to do or get something, and then just leave out the best part. There's no fun, nor common sense, nor joy. Its just useless."
Ashura nodded. "It was just a stupid analogy..."
"ANY WHO!" Chris yelled as he interrupted the childish banter going on between the three. "The race will load shortly. You all have a few minutes to prepare. Or hours. Or seconds. This machine is unpredictable."
"And rusty." James added.
"And bland." Amanda noted, observing the dullness of the arenas textures.
"And shitty. Don't forget shitty." Ashura said with a smirk. "Just like this fucking competition."
"Do you wanna be catapulted?"
"I thought the elimination tactic was the Boat of Loserdom…" Amanda pondered.
"We have an emergency catapult, just in case the boat happened to break down. And fortunately enough(for us!), it did. So now, for this elimination night, it will be a catapult finish. Way to "launch" into the finale, eh?"
Crickets.
"Sheesh, tough crowd. Or show. Aw..."shoot".
Crickets. Even more crickets.
"I just wanna be "blasted" into the finale." Chris said, peeved but in need of a chuckle.
You get where the chirping is coming from.
"Alright! The race is downloaded. In 3...2...1...Now!"
The race had been downloaded. But it looked so...cutesy and deadly and the same time. Pink spike traps...exploding stuffed animals...Rainbow hand grenades...teddy bear missiles...everything that your inner child could dream of. I can see the headlines now: "TEENS KILLED BY CUTENESS. INEXPLICABLY ADORABLE AUTOPSY." (I'm such a dick. :3 )
"It makes you WANT to die." Amanda said with a happy-sad kind of sigh.
"Well, lets avoid the Care Bear crocodiles and try to reach the finish." Ashura remarked with a stoic expression.
"Right past the Frozen Explosion Radio?" James asked, dumbfounded.
"Er...yeah." Amanda and Ashura mumbled.
-in the real world-
"CHEF! Why is the scenery so cutesy wutesy? I want explosions and screams, and fake blood! The stuff that can sell! Not some sort of replica for a rip-off Build-A-Bear: Dentist Office Edition! It looks like an obstacle course for 5 and 6 year old kids! Why is that?! Huh?!" Chris asked, furious.
Chef simply responded, despite the hostility. "I got a call from the network, and they said that because this show has become such a hit with the teens instead of adults, like it was supposed to be, we had to keep a "family-friendly" image. Or something like that. He sounded like he was on drugs."
"But we have these teenagers swearing and sexually gesturing at will! Especially Ashura, since all he knows is bad words, drugs, fear and sex! Its all he talks about!"
"We'll find a way."
"Grr...i hope you're right on that, Chef. Otherwise you're fired."
"Oh, believe me, I have a plan."
-in the VR challenge-
James was walking around the place, taking his sweet time, if you will.
"I have this entire game down flat. I'm positive. I just cannot act like a threat for the rest of today. Remember the perks that I mentioned in "Tune It Up"? Yeah, being clever as a fox. I don't know if it classifies, but I'm just taking the sweet glory...and hopefully the million." His train of thought then switched tracks, and stared into space. "Hm...I wonder if I should get something for Isaac when I win? Scratch that. IF I win. Hm..."
Amanda however, was somewhat nervous. "Gotta stay focused, gotta win for Emma, gotta stay on focus. I must focus! God, I'm sounding like Mom when she's stressed..."
Ashura? Oh, Ashura. Poor sap was about to fall dizzy and faint. Lets just say, that 'cutesy wutesy' isn't on his list of professional skills.
"Too much cuteness...TOO MUCH. I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. ALL THESE FREAKING RAINBOWS. ALL THIS STUFF. CARE BEARS, BARBIE, FROZEN, BABY LOONEY TUNES...wait, what the fu-
BOOM
Very little to Ashuras knowledge, that he had been stepping into a MINEFIELD. When he stepped on one, it simply spelled game over. And the cutesy wutesy was gone.
FOR HIM, ANYWAY!
Ashura then woke up in the outside world, the helmet covering his green and black hair and yellow eyes.
"What the hell just happened?!" Ashura then got smacked with a frying pan. OW! WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!"
"Told you I had a plan." Chef told Chris, as Chris snickered. He then turned back to Ashura. "Now listen here, boy. And listen mighty fine. Every time you swear, or pick fun, or make a sexual gesture, or smoke behind a cabin..."
"Wait, how do you know about that?" Ashura asked, dumbfounded.
Chris smirked. "You just told us, ya dummy!"
Chef hit Ashura in the head again.
"Had that one coming..." Ashura muttered.
"Anyways, any one of those things happen, and you get smacked with the pan. One, two, three strikes with the pan, and you're out, boy. Even if its on the finale day. Three strikes, and the opposition goes home with the million."
"But that's not fair!" Ashura pouted.
"Life's not fair, boy. Get used to it. It's reality TV." Chef said, as he put his frying pan in the back pocket of his apron.
-in the VR challenge again-
James and Amanda were walking towards the finish line, but each at their own separate pace. They don't wanna pull an Ashura. Like...ever. DON'T DO IT. DON'T. (Dat's wight. I can c u thru a computer scween. Lololollololololololollololololololollol)
"So...Amanda. I think its pretty obvious...but, what are you gonna do with the money, if you win it?"
"Save my sister. Then...after that, if I have any left, ill just save it for when the time comes. And why did you say it was 'pretty obvious?' It's not like I've sobbed in recent times."
"RECENT times."
"...It's still progress, right?" Amanda asked with a shrug.
"I guess you can call it that. Its not bad progress, either.-"
BOOM
Amanda had been blown up by a Care Bear missile just as James had crossed the finish line, next to the "Frozen Explosion" combo radio.
"I guess I win? It doesn't feel like a victory..." James mumbled.
"James wins the challenge for today, and is a certain competitor in the FINAL 2 OF TOTAL DRAMA!"
James had to contain himself from jumping with joy. HE ACTUALLY HAD A CHANCE!
As that was said, both Amanda and James had woken up from the visual recording, as the helmets were covering their hair and eyes. Feeling sweaty as a pig, they both took off the helmets.
"Amanda...Ashura...you two are coming to the FINAL elimination ceremony of Total Drama. God, time has flied by."
"Not for us..." Amanda said, trying to make Chris feel guilty.
"I know! That's why it was so fun!" Chris said with a smirk.
"So much for trying..." Amanda muttered.
"Can't blame ya. It'd be a miracle to see him smile with a look of sincerity for once in his life. I don't even think he's ever smiled with honesty...not even to his wife, I think." James whispered, which made Amanda giggle.
"Hardy hardy ha! You're lucky you're safe, James." Chris said as he shook his head slightly. "Meet me at the ceremony in 3 hours. All of you. James can vote JUST THIS ONCE in the Final 3, since we need a vote to tip the scale over to one side, rather than it just being even. We can't have Amanda vote for Ashura, and vice versa, than call it a day, right?"
"Im actually okay with that." Ashura said, but was drowned out by Chris loud voice.
"So, in order to make SURE a person goes home tonight, all 3 of you will be voting. But you can only vote either Ashura or Amanda. No James. He's invincible.
-Confessional Start: James-
"You're damn right, I'm invincible!" James then started to break it down to a beloved dancing move, also known as the "Happy Snoopy Dance."
-Confessional End: James-
-with Amanda-
Silence.
-with Ashura-
Silence.
-3 Hours Later...at the FINAL ceremony…-
"Damn...only 2 marshmallows? I wish we had more...Oh, wait! We do! Here you go, James. Its an invincibility prize.
James did a fist bump and savored his last marshmallow of the competition, although meanwhile, Ashura clenched something in his pocket.
"The votes have been cast..." Chris began. "And its no shocker on who was voted for. The one going home is Ashura. Sorry dude, you had it coming." Chris said with an uncaring shrug.
"Actually...I think I have some more to go." Ashura said with a smirk.
"Oh, yeah? And hows that?" James asked mockingly.
"Well, if you wanna know so badly, this!" Ashura said triumphantly as he pulled an idol out of his pocket. And it looked REAL.
"Its the second idol!" Chris exclaimed. "I forgot all about this from five years ago, holy cow! Dude, you got eyes like a hawk..."
"Woah, woah, woah...Second idol?! When were you gonna plan on telling us?!" Amanda yelled angrily.
"Bitch, did you not hear him?" Ashura began to speak, but after he absorbed a blow from Chefs frying pan. "Anyways, he said he forgot about it. God, I bet you're sister is smarter than you, and she has cancer rotting her cells!"
Amanda just froze. She had spent this entire time trying to save her sister, in a shot to win it all. Third is good, Second is better, but FIRST PLACE? Its the best. And while she may not be going home a victor...she's not gonna let this rage inducing fuse of live TV go out without a bang.
"Fuck...you, Ashura." Amanda said in a tone that no one else has heard before. Even James looked shocked, and he was the one with a balled up fist for Ashura instead.
"All this time...ALL THIS TIME...I believed that there was some good in you. Just even an ounce would be possible. That's all it would take. But I guess I was wrong. You're just an evil, needy, self-conscious, uncaring, narcissistic CUNTBAG who's too afraid to be nice! And after all that I did, the win that I literally sacrificed for you when Heather came here-"
"Wait, you found her?" James cut in abruptly.
"JAMES, NOT NOW." Amanda said fiercely, which caused James to stick his hands up and walk backwards slowly. Even Chris and Chef followed suit.
"The things that I've done for you...sacrificed wins, took blames, took insults...I even had to help you get over your fear of affection! I believed in you when no one else did. But now I see...God could give you a second life and you'd waste it, cause that's what you do. You take EVERYTHING for granted. You'd win the lottery, but you'd spend ALL THE MONEY on hookers, drugs, and beer. Cause you TAKE EVERYTHING FOR GRANTED. You could win respect for life, but…-Actually, I'm not sure if anyone could respect you...But the point is, because YOU-
"Take everything for granted?" James called from the back.
Amanda, instead of yelling, at the ill-tempered teen, decided to agree. "What he said." She said, bitterly.
"As much as me and Chef would love to see Ashura be beaten to a pulp..." Chris began to say.
"HEY!" Ashura yelled.
"Amanda, the catapults waiting for you." Chef said. "I'll escort you there." He said as he began to walk towards the dock.
"Better get a move on, broad. And leave me to my million." Ashura said with a smirk.
Just then, an unknown figure kicked Ashura square in the crotch from behind.
"Ow..." Ashura managed to mutter, before falling over, holding his groin.
James looked at the figure suspiciously. "Who are you, exactly? He asked out of sheer curiosity.
"Who am I?" The figure said, with a healthy and strong voice. "My name is Emma. Emma Ackerman."
Amanda's eyes widened as big as UFO's. She turned around in disbelief, only to find out...that it in fact WAS Emma. She had the same visual appearance as Amanda, so it was kinda hard tell on who was talking when Emma and Amanda lunge hugged each other.
"Emma, I thought you had cancer!" Amanda managed to say whilst being overwhelmed with excitement.
"Well..." Emma started to say. "It turns out that Chris isn't always a dick."
Amanda then turned to Chris, with a smile gradually happening. "How did you manage?" Amanda said, voice cracking from happiness.
"If you have a game show, then you can also have top-notch doctors. Which...hehe, we do. We fixed up her cancer around 1 or 2 days ago. We were just keeping it surprise until you got eliminated, or if you won. Either or."
"I don't know if I should be happy that she's alive! Or mad because you kept it from me that she was alive." Amanda said, scratching her head.
"How about just be happy that I'm here to stay, Amanda? Enjoy the moment. Now come on, lets get launched on the catapult. Together." She said with a smile as big as an enlarged python.
"You got it, sis." Amanda said as they both followed Chef to the dock.
-at the Dock-
"Amanda, with your sister being the motivation, you held strong power, speed, determination, and moxie. But, with tonight being finished, you thought it was all over. Then your sister came in, and lifted your heart. I'm pretty sure that the losers would like to meet your sister, so I won't keep them waiting. Anything that you want to say before you get blasted away?" Chris asked the two sisters, as then they turned to the remaining two men in the competition.
"James." Amanda started. "I hope you win! You seem like the kinda person who would win a show like this. Keep your head up and spirits even higher." She said with a wave and a smile. "And as for you, Ashura. Prepare to be FUCKED UP by this guy. She said coldly as she imitated a decapitation action.
Ashura simply scoffed as he held an ice pack to his bruised crotch. "Can you just launch this bitch and leave me and Anger Management to the finale?"
Ashura would then receive two gut punches from the Ackermans, a frying pan blow from Chef to the head, and a rage induced kick to the already bruised genitals of his by James. "Ow..." Ashura whimpered.
"I'll do my best to win, A. See ya tomorrow!" James said as he waved goodbye to the twin sisters.
Emma and Amanda both waved goodbye and they were then launched by the catapult. Once they were out of sight, Chris gave the ending once more, standing in front of one valiant, stoic, but easygoing man, and another bad-ass, stone cold bodied, but bruised man.
"Hows that for the day, huh? Sure has been a while since we saw an injury on the show, huh?" he said as he chuckled. "Any who, the final two competitors are James Thompson, and Ashura Hedgehog. Tomorrow will sure be a finale to remember, as its rivalry at it's finest. Each second counts, every minute will seem longer, and hours...well, we'll cross that topic for when we come to it. But as for now, im you're host, Chris McLean. And we are less than 12 hours from the finale? Who will lose, and who will win, and take home the MILLION BUCKS? You'll have to tune in and see, because this has been the second to last episode of Total...Drama...Island!
-end-
Hey there guys! Inky Zzarzz here. Sorry I haven't been updating in a while. Here's why.
1.) The weather down here has been really, really shitty. And my antsy hands haven't been able to be on a keyboard for the time being.
2.) We all know this once. SCHOOLWORK! It's been getting in the way, and I haven't had much time to do what I want to do because of it.
3.) Since I had no computers around often, I was training in Smash 3DS. I hope to make it big and become a tourney player. (Sorry, getting off topic!)
But, alas, there is a light at the end of every tunnel. Because...*those at a computer desk, give me a drum roll, please!*
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I have my laptop now! YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAH. Which means, I'll be able to update a hell of a lot more often. And more great news! I'm making a Total Drama O.C...2! That's right! A sequel, baby! If you guys would be so kind, I would like you to put in any other that yourself or a close friend may have. So please ask any friends or relatives for their own characters. When this gets over, which should be around the beginning of February, I'll start accepting submissions!
But, its time for me to be signing off right about now! This has been Inky Zzarzz, and I am signing off! See y'all later, and I'll see you in the finale.
Buh-bye!
-Inky Zzarzz