He had a nightmare that night. One so bad he cried out in his sleep, which terrified poor Lisbon. She had a hard time waking him up and then calming him down. Eventually he managed to relax, at least enough to stop shaking and Teresa convinced him to go shower while she changed the sheets. He had woken up in a cold sweat and everything was damp.

"Feeling better?" she met him at the bathroom door and hugged him.

"Yeah, thanks", he smiled and kissed her cheek. "I'm sorry."

"Not your fault", she said as she guided him back to bed. "I made you some chamomile tea" she nodded towards the mug sitting by his side of the bed.

"Thank you. You're too good to me you know."

"I know", she grinned. "But I figure I get a lot back, so it's okay."

"Really? What do you get?" he asked, sounding serious.

"You. I get you."

He wasn't sure if that was such a good bargain but knew it was more than his life was worth to say it. Teresa hit him on the shoulder. "Hey, what was that for?"

"For what you were thinking. Patrick, when are you going to get it that I'm lucky to have you? You're an amazing, loving, interesting man. You bring me so much, so stop being so down on yourself."

"What do I bring you Teresa?" he wanted to know. He turned on the bed, so that he was facing her. "I wake you up with nightmares, I could barely even acknowledge that you were pregnant with my child, let alone support you. I spent ten years hunting a killer and then I became one myself. What do I possibly bring you?"

"You know me and you love me anyway", she said. "You know my faults, you know my weaknesses – but you also know my strengths and my dreams – and you love me for all of them. And you darn well make my life more interesting."

He chuckled. "That I'll agree with." He sighed. "This was so stupid."

"No, it was totally understandable. I was freaked out by that damn card too. Don't beat yourself up about it and don't let it get to you. It was a crazy mistake, that's all."

"You think that's all it was?"

"Cho called me, after we left. He had a chance to speak to Michelle and he's sure it was an honest mistake. She didn't even know we were a couple and she hadn't read or heard anything about you. I think she just thought you were an ass."

He laughed at that. "Yes, I think you're right. You know, in a strange way it was kind of nice."

"What was?"

"Oh, someone not knowing anything about me – just reacting to me as a regular person."

"Jane – you aren't a regular person", his love told him gently. "You're extraordinary."

"Maybe", he smiled quickly, but then grew serious. "I just mean – it's nice not to be thought of as the man who lost his wife and child to a serial killer, or the man who spent ten years hunting the murderer – or the former psychic and con-man. It's nice just to be a regular – ass." He grinned.

She leaned forward and kissed him. "I understand. And you know, as time goes on, people will think about it less and it will fade. I think having a child will help. Pretty soon we'll just be regular parents, taking our kid to daycare or to the park."

"Sounds good", he answered, although there was still a tension about him, a look in his eyes that told of his remaining fear.

"You're frightened again?"

"Not again", he answered slowly. "It hasn't left. But I was starting to deal with it and this -"

"Set you back?"

"I'm sorry", he said simply. "I'll try not to let it, but I keep seeing that damned face. I thought I'd dealt with that Teresa", he cried, grabbing his pillow and holding it in front of him. "Now I'm dreaming of it again and it's always in the context of the baby."

"I wish I could take that away from you", she said quietly, "but I know I can't. I expect it will always be with you, but I also believe it will begin to fade too, over time. All we can do is go forward and not let the bad things take over."

"I know", he sighed "and I'm trying, really I am." He leaned up against the headboard, contemplating all he had and trying to not let today's episode get to him more than it already had. He lifted his teacup and took a sip. "She's going to feel guilty as hell", he said abruptly, sounding not at all upset by that fact.

"I'm sure she will", Teresa answered, a glint in her eye. She was a long way from forgiving the arrogant new agent. "It'll be good for her soul."

Michelle Vega spent a restless night. By the time she and Cho had gotten back Jane and Teresa had gone home. Abbott had called her into his office and nicely told her that he'd given them the rest of the day off. He'd then – again nicely – reamed her a new one for not doing her homework and reading up on her teammates. "I would have expected you to prepare yourself for this job", he told her, "and part of that means finding out everything you can about the people you're going to work with."

She'd nodded, apologized and told him that she would do everything she could to make up for what she'd done.

"We'll see", he said. "If Jane or the others can't trust you, I'll have you transferred", he told her bluntly. "This team is too good to lose and you, Agent Vega, are the newby here. Jane may be a consultant, but he has years of experience and dozens of successful cases under his belt. You will show him some respect and you will learn to deal with the fact that he operates differently than most other agents. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes Sir", she nodded, really wishing there were a hole or a corner in which to crawl.

"Look Michelle", he said, suddenly sounding tired. "I know you didn't mean any harm and were, in fact, trying to do something nice. Just next time – find out as much information as you can before doing something. It's an important lesson in your work."

"Thank you Sir. I will. And I am terribly sorry. I really didn't mean for this to happen."

"I understand but – watch yourself."

"I will."

"No, I mean really watch yourself. Jane probably has something planned for you and his way of getting back at people can be – rather ingenious."

She looked at him quizzically, wondering.

Abbott sighed. "Yes, I speak from experience. Now go."

She couldn't help the small grin that appeared, but thanked him and headed back to her desk. As unpleasant as that had been, it could have gone much worse.

In fact, it was worse that very afternoon. She had quickly become a pariah to the other agents on the floor. She'd always thought that most people had trouble with Jane, but it was clear that he had their loyalty – and were they ever pissed at her. She felt like she'd walked into a refrigerator.

Even dear, sweet Wylie refused to look at her and kept his eyes on his computer. The only person who was nice was Cho. She sighed. She'd barely started and already everyone hated her.

Now she had to go back into work, on practically no sleep and she'd have to face Jane. She screamed into her pillow. If only she could go back and do the last few weeks over again.

"Jane?"

"Hey Cho – what's up?" Jane glanced at his watch and wondered why his friend and partner was calling at 7:30 in the morning. He hoped it wasn't a murder. He was hoping for a quiet day after the night he and Teresa had had.

"Just calling to let you know that everyone is pretty mad at Vega for the card. She's pretty much being frozen out by the rest of the staff."

Jane sighed. "I wondered about that. You're sure that this was just a mistake on her part?"

"Yeah. She didn't have a clue and she feels pretty awful about it."

Jane nodded, but then realized that Cho couldn't see him. "Okay, leave it with me. And thanks."

"No problem. See you soon."

"Who was that?" Teresa walked out from the bedroom, just having finished showering. Plopping down on the bed next to Patrick she snuggled up to him.

"Cho. He told me everyone is giving Vega a hard time."

"Really? Good."

"Teresa", he shook his head. "The poor woman made a mistake."

His love snorted. "Right. And she's been so kind to you up until now."

"She didn't know what to make of me", he told her, his eyes unfocused as he thought of something.

"Most people don't. That doesn't mean they're obnoxious."

"I'll talk to her this morning."

"And tell her what?"

He shrugged. "I'll figure it out. Now – where were we?"

"Uh – you were sitting on the bed and I just showered. It's your turn."

"Mmm. Although I think there's something I'd rather do." He turned into her and began to nuzzle her neck.

"Patrick!"

"What?"

"We have to go to work."

He grinned. "Not right now we don't".

Michelle arrived at work and sat for a few minutes in her car. She watched as a number of people got out of theirs and walked towards the building. She wanted to wait until there was no one else in the parking lot. Call her a coward, but she'd rather not have to face anyone this morning.

Looking at her watch she knew it was time to head in. The last thing she needed was to be late, especially after her talk with Abbott. With a deep breath and a small prayer she headed towards the front door.

A few people passed her but since she didn't know them, she wasn't worried. It was as she stepped up to the front door that she noticed Patrick Jane. He was leaning up against the wall by the door, but he straightened when she showed up.

She stopped dead and looked directly at him. She swallowed and then opened her mouth, ready to apologize and to grovel.

"Not here", he told her with a smile. "Come on." He carefully grabbed her arm, took one look around, and headed away from the building. She had no idea where he was taking her as she hadn't had any chance to explore the surrounding area since she'd been here.

They walked for almost five minutes until they came on a little park with a few benches around the sides. "Nice place to come and grab lunch", he told her. He led her over to one of the benches and sat down. With a gesture he invited her to sit.

"There are some ducks that live in the pond just – over there", he pointed. "There's a mother and eight ducklings. I like to come and watch them, although the ducklings are getting a lot bigger now and will soon be on their own.

She didn't know what to say. He was talking about ducks when she'd done that horrible thing to him yesterday. She took a deep breath and opened her mouth –

"There was a fox around here one day and I was worried he was going to get one of the ducklings, but mama herded them all out into the middle of the pond. He waited a long time and finally gave up. She is a very good mother."

Michelle regarded him closely, only noticing now that he looked rather pale and tired – probably about like her. "I'm sorry", she blurted. "I didn't know."

"About the duck?" he asked with a smile.

"What?" She frowned. "No – I mean, no, I didn't know about the ducks but I was talking about yesterday."

"Ah", he nodded. "Yes."

"I can't tell you how awful I felt – feel. I would never ever do anything like that on purpose. I really was – I mean, I felt badly that we didn't seem to have hit it off very well, and I know that was my fault, so I was trying to do something nice. I just had no idea."

"Good to know", he nodded. "You didn't read up on me before taking this job." He said it as a statement, rather than a question.

"No, and I'm sorry. If it makes you feel any better, Abbott gave me hell for that."

"Really? Actually, I think you did the right thing – not reading my file that is. Did you look up the others?"

"Just enough to know that Kimball and Teresa had worked together at the CBI for many years."

"I see. Can I ask why you didn't read up on us?"

She sighed. "I know it was stupid, but I wanted to get to know everyone face-to-face first. Sometimes the things people write can give a false impression. I know – stupid right?"

"No. Actually I agree with you completely." He grinned. "I didn't read your file either."

"No? But you knew all those things about me."

He shrugged. "Guesses – well, not exactly guesses. I'm just observant."

"That's what Cho said. He said you used to be a psychic."

"No", he shook his head, almost sounding angry. "I was never a psychic. I was a conman who pretended to be a psychic."

"Were you good?"

"A good conman? Yes, very."

"But how? I mean, how do you pretend to be a psychic and pull it off so people believe it?"

He thought for a moment and then shrugged. "Tricks, mind games, having a good memory", he smiled, "being observant."

"I see." She sat quietly for a minute. "Do you think – are you willing to still work with me?"

He shrugged. "I'll work the way I always work", he told her. "I'm fine with having you there, if you want to be. I think the real question is, are you willing to work with me?"

She regarded him seriously, knowing it was a valid question. Could she work with him or would he drive her crazy? He didn't follow the rules, did his own thing, showed no respect for authority, and seemed to be able to see right through her. And then there was the biggest issue of all.

"Can I ask you a question?"

He glanced at her and then smiled. "You can ask."

Meaning he might not answer. Still, she needed to know. "Why do you do this?"

"And by this you mean - ?"

"Work with the FBI, solve cases. Why do you do it?"

"Didn't Cho tell you about the deal I made with the FBI?"

"Yes, he did. Is that the only reason?"

Where a second ago Jane had been rather flippant and appeared totally relaxed, now he grew serious. He regarded her carefully and then thought about what she had asked. Finally he spoke.

"At first – with the CBI – it was to find out as much as I could about Red John. They were the lead on the case so I figured that if I worked for them I'd be able to find him more easily. It also", he paused and looked into the distance. "It also helped that I had something to do, something to keep my mind occupied."

It was obvious what he meant and, for the first time, Michelle found herself feeling real sympathy for this rather strange man. Although he hid it well, she could suddenly see the pain that must still exist behind his lighthearted persona.

He looked at her and his sunny smile appeared. "I drove Teresa crazy", he told her. "I'm surprised she didn't shoot me years ago."

"That's what Cho said."

Jane actually laughed – and she realized it was something he didn't do very often. He smiled a lot but she was starting to wonder how many of his smiles actually portrayed real joy, and how many were a front. Somehow she knew that the laughter was real – and much less common. "Yeah. I think he had to restrain her himself a few times."

"And you enjoyed that", she said, her head tilted as she looked at him.

"Sometimes", he admitted. "Still do", he grinned.

She shook her head. "So, you're here because of Teresa?"

He again regarded her, as if trying to make up his mind. Finally, with a sigh he turned away from her and stretched his legs out in front of him.

"Not – completely", he admitted.

She noticed that he was squinting as if trying to see something in the distance, but when she looked all she could see were the trees on the other side of the park.

"Justice", he finally said softly.

"For the victims who have been murdered?"

He laughed softly. "They're dead. They couldn't care less about justice. No, for the living – for the families and loved ones, for the innocent. And justice for the guilty. No one should be able to get away with murder."

"Some people would say you did", she told him gently.

He smiled, although he still didn't look at her. "That wasn't murder", he said.

"It was justice?"

This time he turned to her and smiled – a full on, teeth bared smile. "Yes, it was justice."

She nodded and sat back. "You asked me if I could still work with you."

"Mmm hmm."

"And the answer is yes. I may want to kill you at times – probably a lot of times – but I also think there's a lot I can learn from you."

"And it matters", he stated.

"Matters?"

"That I'm not here just to escape a prison sentence or because I'm in love with Lisbon. It matters to you that I'm doing this for -"

" – justice", she said. "Yes, it matters."

"Good." He stood up slowly and stretched. "I think it's time to get back or Teresa is going to send Cho after us – and you don't want that, believe me."

She stood up as well. "Scary?"

"Oh yeah. He can be very scary. Not as scary as an angry Lisbon though. Watch out for her."

Michelle groaned softly. "And I expect she's pretty mad at me now."

He grimaced. "Yeah. Sorry. It'll probably take her a while to get over it."

"And how about you?" she wanted to know. "Are you still angry."

"I wasn't angry", he told her. "It – upset me – seeing that symbol", he admitted, again not looking at her. "But I wasn't angry."

"And you're okay with everything between us?"

He considered this for a moment. "As long as I get the front seat."

She rolled her eyes and then laughed. "Okay, it's a deal. But I still don't think they should let you lie around on the couch all day."

He smiled and they walked back to the FBI building together.