Nico is finally awake! I hope you guys like this, because it was being really difficult to write :l not really sure why, but it just wasn't getting on the page. But hey, I finally managed to update!
From the minute I put the image of Percy's cabin in my mind, I knew how I wanted to wake up. Barring, of course, the gods allowing it.
They might just take this obviously near fatal injury as a chance to get rid of me once and for all. They couldn't kill me directly, of course. Zeus couldn't strike me down with a lightning bolt, Poseidon couldn't drown me in some kind of freak accident. I'd served them far too long for that, saved the world far too many times for them to get away with it. My father would be furious if they did, and I'm sure at least a few of the other goddesses would feel the same way. Maybe Hestia, Aphrodite, Pershephone. They had a soft spot for me, I guess. Aphrodite for, well, obvious reasons She was a sucker for a good love story, and I provided plenty of entertainment in that regard.
Even so, the Olympians had no obligation to keep me alive, stop the Fates from cutting my string. I was dangerous, a nuisance, something to get rid of when opportunity struck. I made a lot of enemies among the immortals.
It would be better for them if I was gone, unable to meddle in important, godly business. It would be better for a lot of people...I would be missed by very few, but it would probably be better in the long run.
I didn't want to die through. I honestly didn't...
It was surprising.
Just a year ago, I would have been content to die in battle, in service to my father. At that time, it was all I would ever amount to, all I could ever possibly manage. I knew I probably wouldn't live to long, demigods this powerful rarely did. So why not die in battle for a decent cause? A selfless act, really. For the good of the world...
It's not like I would ever be mourned, ever be missed. I would never be able to die the true hero's death, never get a shroud burned at camp...
I doubt the campers would've ever found out about my death, and even if they did, they wouldn't care. Nobody would care. Nobody would have known me well enough to care...
I honestly would've be okay with that. It would be a bit sad, yes, but it would all be okay in the end. After all, I would finally be free, at peace after so many years of suffering...
But now...now I had Hazel and Percy and the rest of the Seven and Reyna and Sally and Paul and-and... Gods, I...I had a family. For the first time since I was a tiny little kid, I had an actually family. For so long, it had just been Bianca and I, that was all. I could scarcely remember my mother, just scattered fragments, little snapshots of my life in Italy so long ago.
Maybe my new family was little and broken, but it was still good...
I didn't want to leave them. They all meant too much to me, we'd been through too much together. I could only hope I meant a something to them.
I didn't want to be gone...I didn't want to have to say goodbye to anyone...
I didn't want to leave Reyna. She was a friend, at least sort of. We'd shared a lot when transporting the Athena Parthenos, and I probably knew a lot more about her past than most people. I wished we could've spent more time together. Maybe if I got the chance to go to college in New Rome, we could be friends...
I didn't want to leave Jason either. He was a nice guy, genuinely loyal to his friends. I guess I counted as one, because he always seemed concerned about me. He cared about me, he was willing to keep my secrets.
I didn't want to leave the Seven either...they were honestly fun to be around. And they were all nice people to boot, willing to accept me even though I wasn't really all that acceptable. It was hard to admit, because I generally hated people, but now...I couldn't ignore it. I wanted to be closer to them...I wanted to give them better reasons to care about me. I wanted their friendship...I wanted jokes and fun and normal teenager things.
I didn't want to leave Hazel especially. She would be left alone to sew my shroud and deliver my goodbyes. She...she would be the last child of Hades/Pluto. We were meant to be together, relics of times long passed. She was the only person that could fully understand me in that respect. She knew what it was like to be stolen from another time and dropped into the 21st century.
And gods...I didn't want to leave Percy. I really, really didn't want to leave him. It was the same as with Hazel, it felt like I would be leaving him alone, the sole survivor of Tartarus. He would be alone with people that couldn't understand him...alone with people who didn't know the real him.
I didn't want to leave any of them.
But if the gods allowed me to live, if they gave me that gift...I would make a change in my life.
I would try harder. I would really, really be different.
I would push through all my awkwardness and self-hatred and try for once to be a truly social person. I would apologize for everything I'd done wrong, every mistake.
I would have a new beginning, a new family...
And I would start with Percy. I would actually tell him how much he meant to me.
No...no, I wouldn't tell him that I loved him, not in that way. It was doubtful if I would ever muster up the courage to do that...and I certainly didn't have it now. Maybe I would be able to someday, but not yet...just not yet.
But I would tell him how much he meant to me, how much I cared for him, how much he'd done for me. I would promise him that I was going to try and be better.
I would make sure he knew just in case...just in case anything happened to either of us. I needed him to know that he meant a lot to me, more than anything.
And I wanted it to start at my bedside, the minute I woke up. I wanted him to be there...
Call me sappy or romantic, but it's all I wanted. Well, other than living of course.
I wanted him there, eyes wide and shining. I wanted the adorable, happy, excited Percy sitting at my bedside, so glad that I was alive and awake and finally okay.
I wanted that memory, that one beautiful, incredible memory just between the two of us. I wanted something I could look back on when I was alone. Something more than what we already had, something special.
In the end, I did get Percy at my bedside. His face was the first thing I saw when I woke. It just wasn't exactly how I wanted it...
Before I could even dwell on the pain, any permanent damage, or ask how long I was out cold, I saw his face and my stomach dropped.
He didn't look happy, not exactly. There was something off.
It was like he was trying hard to look like he was happy though. His face was pulled into a tight grin, but it didn't reach his eyes...
His eyes were strange. They weren't quite happy or sad or scared or nervous. They were some mixture of every emotion that could possibly be felt at this moment in time. I'd never seen them like that before...
I lifted my head off the pillow and tried to open my mouth, tried to ask what was wrong, but he just lifted a finger to his lips and shushed me, gripping my hand tighter still.
"Shhh, Neeks. You need to rest," he whispered, his voice cracking slightly.
He had a point though. I could already feel my eyelids drooping a bit. My head dropped back onto the pillow, already dizzy, already swimming. Everything was already starting to hurt, my initial panic over Percy melting away as it was replaced by a dull throb though my body and foggy, half-lidded vision.
I heard Percy shout out for some help, and some blonde Apollo girl who's name I didn't catch swam in front of my vision. With her help, Percy gently propped me up against the pillows, making sure I wasn't in too much pain. I heard him whisper to her something, but the only word I caught was "Hazel". She must be at camp, waiting for me to wake up...
My eyes shut again, but I could feel Percy's fingers brushing the hair from my forehead. It was nice...
I fell back asleep soon after.
Next time I woke up, Percy was still next to me again. Ik wasn't sure how much time had passed, but it looked darker outside. I saw him move and grab something from the table by my bed. A chilled glass of amber liquid. Nectar. He gently lifted the straw to my mouth, and I took a few sips. It tasted like birthday cake. Like Sally's birthday cake, actually.
Gods, that was an old memory. That'd been years ago, when I'd only just decided to fight for the gods. Right after I became the Ghost King...
The nectar made me feel a lot better, actually. The pain dulled to an annoying throb, but it was fine. I could manage it. I had more energy too. I lifted my head and shifted a bit, looking over at Percy. He helped prop me up against the pillows again.
"Better?" he asked nervously, putting the straw back in my mouth. I took a few more sips and nodded.
"How long...how long was I out?" I managed to ask in a hoarse voice.
"Not long, just a few days," he answered shortly, averting his eyes.
My brow furrowed. What was wrong?
"Did I-I miss anything?" I asked again, already worrying, almost panicking. Now that the pain was pretty much gone, I could really focus on Percy. Something still seemed off to me. He wasn't looking me in the eyes, wasn't even touching me. Before he'd been so...I don't know, tender, I guess. Now he seemed jumpy.
Something had to be wrong.
"N-no. Nothing happened. You...you didn't miss anything," he stuttered, his eyes shifting away from me again.
Before I could protest, he practically jumped out of his chair, grabbing the mostly empty glass of nectar and taking it back behind the curtains...
I fell back against the pillow and groaned softly. Something was mostly definitely wrong.
Oh Percy...we all know what's "wrong" but Nico doesn't yet xD
Well, until next time my awesome readers (because apparently there are over 200 people following this story, and that's a personal best for me!)