Hi:) second part, enjoy

Part 2: A Dead Man and A Guilt Filled Man

The next morning, Arthur woke up with a headache; he looked at his phone and it was 5:00 PM, "Oh My God!" He scrambled out of bed and into the bathroom, he was supposed to have lunch with Merlin at 3, he brushed his teeth frantically he was about to call Merlin, but he noticed three messages from his friend.

Hey Arthur, I won't be able to make it to lunch today.

Sorry

oh and I left breakfast outside your door.

The blonde stopped brushing and stared at his phone. "Well, I had to pee anyway." He spat, pissed, and went back to bed grumbling about having to get up for nothing. But then remembered the food outside, so he grumbled and crawled to his front door to get it.

o.o.o.o.o

The Raven-Haired freshman was curled up on his bed, he did not sleep that night, he washed himself three times, brushed his teeth three times, and cried… everything hurt. He did not know what to do, he felt dirty and afraid. His apartment was dark and empty, he tried to forget about Professor Cenred by making Arthur's breakfast, but that only lasted half an hour. It was hard for him to leave the house to deliver the meal, but he was able to walk twenty minutes without getting a panic attack.

He had to wear a hat in order to hide his face, it was bruised up, his arms were not that different, there were marks in the shape of fingers; it was as if Cenred was trying to hold him always.

He hugged himself tighter. "I want to die."

o.o.o.o.o

When Monday came, Merlin felt insecure, he had kiss marks on his chest, yellowing bruises on his arms and face, how was Arthur going to react. He vowed to avoid Arthur until all evidence of him being violated disappeared. However, it was hard for Merlin to let anyone touch him, when Arthur gave him a pat on the back, he flinched hard. Arthur joked about how strong he was getting, but the lack of bantering got him worried. Merlin then avoided him.

A week passed, and it was the longest time Arthur and Merlin have not seen each other for. Arthur was worried and scared that he did something to offend Merlin, at first he did not think much of it since every morning a meal was waiting at his door, but he was still worried.

"You know I haven't seen Merlin in class lately." Gwen said when she and the gang hung out. She was also a freshman, so she took the same GE's as Merlin. "Which is really weird since he's a perfect attendance type of guy.

Gwen, Arthur, Gwaine, Lancelot, Leon, and Morgana was eating lunch together at the Campus Diner. It was saturday, and they wanted to take a break from the doing homework.

"Hey Arthur have you seen him?" Lancelot asked.

Arthur shrugged, "Not really, I mean I know he's alive, he's been leaving food at my door every morning, but I haven't actually seen him."

"What the hell man?" Leon asked, "he cooks for you?" Leon took a bite out of his meal and grumbled, "I want Merlin's food, he cooks like a freaking madman, a good madman."

"Yeah, ever since he looked at my protein-only filled fridge. And he only gives me healthy stuff, I mean like it's good, but he should really understand that I need yummier food."

"Yeah, complaining much aren't you?" Lancelot scoffed.

"Wow… you are the epitome of a brainless muscle man." Morgana commented.

"haha, very funny Morgana. Just because you have a rabbit diet and I don't does not mean I'm stupid."

Morgana blew air through her nose and placed a hand on her chest, "I do not have a rabbit diet."

"She didn't even imply that you idiot," Gwaine laughed. "Which reminds me, where is that muscle-head Percival?"

"He's with Elyan trying to not fail their upcoming final, if they fail it they won't be graduating." Gwen explained. Finals were coming soon, but the seniors were procrastinating.

The blonde could not feel worried aboit his friend. Arthur put on his red Letterman Jacket and stood up. "I'm going to check up on Merlin." He said his goodbyes and left for his friend.

o.o.o.o.o

When Arthur was in front of Merlin's apartment door, he hesitated; he, however, mustered up the courage to knock. There was a sudden thump and and footsteps to the door, and instead of the door opening the sound of the door being locked rang like a bomb, then there was no sound for a while. Arthur knocked again, but no answer. "Merlin! I know you're in there!" Still no answer. "Well I'm going to wait out here until you open up!"

o.o.o.o.o

Merlin was in bed when he hear a knock at the door, he froze, he feared that it was Professor Cenred who was at the door; usually Arthur and his other friends just come in, there was no one he knew who had the courtesy of knocking. He knew his door would be unlocked, so he quickly got out of bed, but his body still ached, his knees gave out and he fell, then struggling he ran to the door to lock it.

"Merlin! I know you're in there!"

When the boy heard the familiar voice he first felt relief, but then he felt ashamed and dirty.

"Well, I'm going to wait out here until you open up!"

Fear ran down Merlin's body. He knew Arthur would do it, when he was rejected by Freya in highschool and refused to talk to him, Arthur camped out Merlin's door for two days. He looked at his hands, they were raw from being washed so much. He then saw the state of his body, blue, purple, and yellow; he quickly ran to the bathroom to wash again and try to scrub the dirty feeling off of him. 'Why is he here?! I'm not clean enough!" He frantically scrubbed. "Ow!" he hissed, his skin on his hands cracked and began to bleed. He didn't know what to do, he was filthy no matter what he did, it killed him again.

o.o.o.o.o

When the sky darkened and the air chilled, Merlin opened the door to let Arthur in.

"Well took you a long time. I'm so freaking hungry, lets eat" Arthur said, he then opened his eyes to a room dark and messy. "What the hell happened here?" He turned back to see Merlin exhausted.

Merlin was pale, his cheeks were yellow and there were dark bags under his blue eyes. His face was smaller than usual. He was wearing two sweaters and sweatpants as if he was trying to hide something from the world.

"M-Merlin, what?" The Blonde couldn't look at his friend for any longer.

"Let me make you something." Merlin said dodging the question. "You said you were hungry." But when he opened his white refrigerator he froze.

"What's wrong?" Arthur entered to kitchen and saw Merlin to flinch. "Merlin?" He walked closer to the fridge. There was absolutely nothing in the fridge. "Merlin… What is this?" Arthur grabbed the boy's wrist, it was thin and bone-ier than usual. "Have you not been eating?!" His face was red.

Merlin couldn't answer.

"You've been making me food all this time, but what have you been running on? air? You need to eat!" Arthur grabbed both sides of Merlin's arms.

"A-Arthur, please let go." He whispered, Arthur was going to see how dirty he was, how unworthy, how violated he was. Merlin lowered his head.

"Tell me what happened! Why haven't you been going to class?" He paused, "did the professor do anything to you?" Arthur gripped harder.

Merlin tried to escape from the older man's grasp, but ended up revealing the wounds on his hands.

Being a jock, Arthur quickly grabbed his hands. "What is this? Merlin. PLEASE tell me!"

"WHY? Why should I?"

"Because I Lo- You're my friend!"

"Arthur… I can't." Merlin lowered his head lower and tried to shield his face with his captured hands.

The blonde let go of the shorter one and groaned, "You are so frustrating!" Merlin retreated into the corner, dropped to curl up into a ball, and began spill tears silently. When Arthur saw the tears flow down his friend's face he froze, he never saw him cry. It was always Arthur who cried, he cried when his father was in danger of dying, when Merlin was missing for a few days, when he was rejected by Gwen. "You-you're crying…"

Merlin tried so hard to keep himself from letting out a sound; he shook and bit his cheeks to stop the tears from escaping his eyes.

Arthur stood there in shock, no one moved until the tears dried up.

o.o.o.o.o

"You were raped." Arthur stated, it was no question, he knew… he knew very well that his best friend was raped. He cautiously moved towards Merlin; Merlin just cowered more into the corner. Arthur grew angry, very, very angry. "Who?" When the victim shook his head, Arthur snapped. "WHO! Why are you protecting him? WHO IS HE?" Then he realized who, "Cenred." Arthur cursed and slammed his fist on the wall. Then he couldn't control himself and rushed to Merlin. "Why, why?" He was confused, Merlin was confused and scared, Arthur was dangerously close. Then he planted a kiss on Merlin's lips.

Suddenly a punch landed on Arthur's left cheek.

The jock gingerly touched his face. "Merlin, please, I love you." Arthur froze, the words came out suddenly, he was never going to say those words.

"Stop shitting me." Merlin spat. "You don't love me, you still love Gwen." He was angry, confused, and sad.

Arthur slapped his lips unto Merlin's once more. The freshman was pushed down to his back but another punch, a struggle, and a protest came; however, Arthur did not stop. Merlin's struggle died down, and his arms dropped to his side and he remained motionless. The kiss was one sided, but it cooled down and it was as if Arthur was trying to make it so gentle that it would make up for the pain he caused his friend. When he raised his head he regretted everything.

"Are you satisfied?" Merlin said without emotion. His cheeks were wet and his eyes red. He did not have any energy nor the life to say anything else.

"Don't cry." Arthur too was stunned from his actions. "Don't cry," he repeated.

They stared at each other in silence.

"Don't cry."

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