Disclaimer : Castle is not mine.

Everything is so still. So slow. You see everyone exhale in the air as their is gun shots fired and the sound of flesh being broken and the stuttered breaths of everyone. In this one moment you hear everyone's fears without a single person speaking. You hear the worries of a father begging for his daughter to be okay, knowing he won't be able to survive without her, but also for the man he knows she has fallen in love with as he knows the tragic pain which is caused when you lose your one true love, your soul mate, your one and done. You hear the fear of a woman in love hoping for the man she loves dearly to be safe, knowing she would give her last breath to him if it meant he could have just one more, knowing you would ive him anything, anything at all if he asked. She was scared for her family but knowing they're safe as they are in the water but not wanting them to witness someone being shot especially in front of her cousins. Then you hear the fear of the man who has proven he would do anything for love, has jumped in front of a bullet for love before and isn't afraid to do it again if it means she keeps breathing, keeps smiling. He loves her with all his heart and he knows that and he knows she knows, sees the way her eyes shimmer for him but always dim when he sees her remembering her shooting, remembering how scared she was and how he whispered those 3 words to her over and over. He would do anything to keep her safe, and she knows that.

The gun shot shatters the stillness and neither Rick or Kate feel the painful tear of flesh the bullet would cause. But they do hear the scream of a man as he buckles under the pain of her bullet. Hers. It becomes real at this point, its all over but at a terrible cost. She has a mans blood on her hands. Another mans blood to add to the others. Knowing she is going to pay for it later, knowing she won't be able to sleep even though she knew she had to make a choice, either him or Rick and she knew she would pick Rick anyway. Her family will look at her differently now, even though its part of the job, serve and protect, she protected and now she has to live with the choice she made. She knows her family will be walking on egg shells around her now and she guesses they have a reason to after all she carries a gun around and she just shot a man in front of them.

She is frozen. Her gun still raised but what else is she meant to do when she just shot a man. She feels the stares coming from the water and she closes her eyes tight just for a second and when she opens them Rick is there slowly tilting her gun down so it is no longer pointed at what is now air and he must hear her fast breathing. He must. But he knows the drill, she has to do CPR and suddenly she is hit with this force, not wanting another man to die from her gun and she is running towards him and she sees his sad eyes on her way to Dunn and she hears the water splashing, assumes its her family coming out knowing it must be safe. But now they have to witness her try t resuscitate a man that tried to kill them all. Has to see her with literal blood on her hands. 10 chest pumps, 2 breaths, 10 chest pumps, 2 breaths. She is on her knees and she feels her breath coming faster and she is trying to suppress her tears but there is a stubborn one rolling down her cheek that she just couldn't stop. She must have been trying to resuscitate him for a while now as she feels a large hand on her shoulder gently pushing him back and she knows it's Castle's hand, they've been in this position before. She leans back on her heels and takes a deep breath and looks at her hands stain red.

She stands on shaky legs and she feels Castle supporting her and she feels grateful because there is no way she can face her family in a wreck. She turns and sees everyone, some staring with sympathetic eyes, some with wide eyes, some shocked and some still scared. She needs to call the cops, she remembers that in her hazy state and asks if one of her family members could do it. She knows she's not aloud to wash the blood off her hands, after all it is evidence. She gives an unconvincing smile to her family and slowly walks off to sit near the lake. She faintly hears her dad asking "Is Katie going to be alright ?"

"Kate is strong but taking anyone's life is going to be hard but just be her kind and loving family and it will get better." Rick said laying a gentle hand on the worried fathers shoulder.

He sits by her and they say nothing but everything at once in the silence that passes between them. She lays her head gently on his shoulder and he lays a protective yet calming arms around her shoulders, pulling her tighter into the warmth in his body. He heard her sniff and he looked down to see the tears finally escaping her eyes and he makes random patters on her arm with his fingers and he feels her move her head more firmly into his chest. He knows the war that is havocing in her head, she must be thinking that everything they said is true. She knows she doesn't have to worry about Tyson waking up, knowing that 4 years of tagging along with her Castle must have learnt something, she also saw him ties by the hands around a bench that has been in the garden forever and knowing she will never be able to sit on that bench again knowing he was tied to it. She wants to curl up in bed and just lay there till she knows she has to move on, she knows she can't knows she will have t make a statement and hand her gun over, knows CSU will be here soon, knows they will take her family statements. She takes a deep breath trying to calm down. One thing at a time.

"Everything is going to be okay Kate." Castle whispers into her hair. Hears her sniffle again.

"I killed a man Castle, how will it ever be okay ?"

"You had no choice, what if he hurt your family or you Kate ?"

"What if he hurt you Castle ?" She asked.

"Then I would have lived, I ain't done annoying you yet Miss Beckett" he said with a smirk to his voice and heard her release a breath and knew there was a smirk on her face somewhere.

It was nearly 9pm when everything was cleared up, all of the young people in bed sleeping She could finally wash the blood off of her hands and she could curl in her bed. Which is where she currently is after excusing herself from her family's silent conversation. She needed to get out of her clothes but she didn't want hers she wanted Castle so she took his shirt which he was wearing earlier today and pulled in over her head and got into bed. Laying on her side facing the window. She heard the door open and close and the light turn off, she heard the rustling of him taking off his clothes, the zipper on his bag, and the bed slowly dip. She moved towards the middle and he must of felt because he moved behind her and she lifted her head so he could place her arm underneath her head and his hand was resting gently on her hip, hers hugging his arm tightly, her eyes screwed shut. They both jut lay there, just being.