Well, it was probably rather nasty of me to make you all wait on that last cliffhanger last week, so... another double update this weekend (in honour of the upcoming Owain Glyndwr Day... naturally.)

"Ianto?" Jack asked, standing in the doorway of the pub as Ianto shouted and waved for a taxi.

Ianto glanced back, careful not to give the driver slowing to the kerb the impression that he'd changed his mind.

"Is it really ok if I go with you?"

"I said so, didn't I?" Ianto said, stepping up to the car.

Jack hesitated for a moment, watching Ianto get into the taxi. He couldn't shake the thought that if he let Ianto leave, there would be no forgiveness. When he saw the expectant look Ianto was giving him from the back seat, Jack hopped into the cab as quick as he could.

Ianto looked over at Jack for a long moment, then reached across the seat for Jack's hand as he gave his address to the driver. Neither passenger said a word for the duration of the drive. Arriving at Ianto's building, Jack rather docilely followed along up to Ianto's flat.

Jack only looked up at Ianto again once the door was shut behind them. "Ianto… I -"

Ianto shook his head quickly, though. "Not now, Jack. I just want to crawl into bed. I know there's a lot we're going to need to talk about, but in the morning, ok?"

Jack nodded, realizing that Ianto probably didn't have anything left in him. Jack couldn't help worrying that every hour that passed exponentially increased the likelihood of Ianto deciding that this whole thing was entirely too much to deal with. If he did, Jack would just have to accept it and offer the Retcon option again. And until such a time as Ianto asked or told him to leave, Jack would stay and savour whatever moments he had left with someone so caring and intelligent and handsome as Ianto Jones.

"The people in the pub," Ianto said, heading toward his bedroom as he pulled off his shirt. "Are they just going to wake up in there, sat at pub tables?"

Jack shrugged. "In situations like that, it's pretty easy. Alcohol is always a useful explanation. Anybody who wasn't drinking much, we try to get them home. I really oughta be helping Andy and Rhys, but…."

"It was your night off," Ianto said, tossing his jeans at the bedroom chair, too knackered to be bothered to drop them in the laundry basket.

"Yeah."

A few moments later, Ianto glanced up at Jack standing by the bedroom window, looking out at the rainy night. "I happen to know for a fact you don't sleep in your clothes," Ianto observed.

"No. Ianto, are you sure you want me here?"

Ianto repressed a sigh. Was Jack that certain of rejection? "I'm very sure, Jack. Yeah, there's a lot I don't understand, and I'm definitely too confused to process it properly just now. But I'm not confused about how I feel where you're concerned. Please stay with me tonight?"

Jack swallowed hard and nodded, and was grateful to shed his clothes and get into Ianto's bed with him. It felt so right when Ianto immediately wrapped his arms tightly around him and snuggled in. With Ianto pressed against him, skin-on-skin, Jack could almost forgot how sore his chest still was and how every muscle in his body still ached from having the blood suddenly rushing back to them a couple hours earlier.

"Try to sleep, Jack," Ianto murmured.

Tired as he was, sleep was the last thing Jack wanted. All he really hoped for at that moment was to hold Ianto and pretend until the sun came up that they were a normal couple that actually stood a chance of making it work. Within moments of 'resting his eyes,' Jack was out like a light.

Hours later, Jack was startled awake by a persistent buzzing across the room and a mumbled "shit" beside him. Ianto stumbled out of bed and rummaged through the pockets of his jeans before all but staggering back to bed and answering the call.

"You alright, Tosh? … Whoa, just a minute, calm down, eh? Maybe you just had more to drink than you thought. … You don't remember anything? …"

Jack shook Ianto's shoulder and mouthed 'we took her home!'

Ianto held a hand up and nodded. "Yeah, yeah… but I'm sure you're fine. You were in no state to drive. We drove you home and made sure you got inside ok. You probably just had a lie down on the couch. … We, uh, Jack and I. You met him last night, at the pub. … Tall, yeah, American, that's him. So, see, nothing to worry about. … Dunno, love, even if someone did put something in your drink, we made sure you were home safe, so… maybe just drink a load of tea? … Yeah, take it easy for the day. Look, will you ring me in a couple hours if you're not feeling better? … Alright. I can always stop round later as well. … Ok. That's it, good, strong, proper tea, that's what you need. None of that green bollocks." Ianto laughed at something Tosh said, then said goodbye and rang off.

"Is there any possibility that that stuff will have any negative side effects?" Ianto asked Jack.

Jack shook his head. "None. It's safer than a multivitamin. Really."

Ianto sighed. "She's worried someone at the pub tried to give her Rohypnol."

"I'm sorry," Jack said. "We kind of see a lot of that when monitoring people who've had encounters. No good answer other than to reassure them they're ok. She could go to a clinic and have a blood draw. Retcon doesn't show up in panel tests, so…."

"This is the sort of thing you deal with almost every day, isn't it?"

Jack nodded.

"How are you feeling this morning?" Ianto asked, lightly brushing Jack's left temple with his fingertips. "I think you were a bit worn down last night."

"I'm alright, Ianto. I'm always alright."

Ianto shook his head. "No, you're not, Jack. Not always. It is ok to talk about it, you know?"

Jack looked at him for a long moment. "I don't want to waste our time talking about how I feel."

"Wouldn't be a waste of time to me. I care what you're feeling like. Sometimes talking helps, or maybe there's something I could do to help, but if you don't say… how will I know?"

"I just mean that… between now and the time you get scared off, I'd rather have memories that focus on you, not me."

"I'm lying here in bed with an immortal time-traveler, and you think there's still something that's going to 'scare me off'?" Ianto smirked. "Get a grip, Jack. I mean, I think it actually makes perfect sense. A nearly infinite number of galaxies out there through the universe must come up to a truly infinite number of possible planets to sustain life. And time-travel isn't exactly that far-fetched either, is it? I read 'A Brief History of Time' at uni. Take Star Trek – how much of that 'impossible' sci-fi stuff is real now? I mean, just having a mobile phone that does about a billion other things as well. Besides… now I know that isn't a custom aftershave – 51st century pheromone, indeed!"

Jack just stared at Ianto. "Ianto… are you really that au fait with all this?"

Ianto shrugged. "Don't know if I'm exactly au fait, but I'm not angry or afraid or anything. It's just what is. And it could be a lot worse."

"Nobody else knows, Yan. What we do, I mean. Torchwood, that is, who I work for."

"I get that." Ianto chuckled unexpectedly. "Well, I'm not about to start an alien scrapbook, am I?"

Jack couldn't help cracking a smile. "Don't know. You are an archivist. Probably in your nature to document everything."

"It's also in my nature to know what belongs where. And some things don't belong written down at home."

Jack nodded and fell solemn again. "It isn't easy, Yan…," he said quietly after a while.

"I imagine not," Ianto said, pulling Jack into a hug. "But you can tell me."

"Ianto, the thing that scares me the most…. It isn't you running from me. That might actually be the least difficult way to…. Yan… I appear to be stuck living forever, unless I find a Doctor who can fix me. And that means that, one day, no matter what happens between us, I'm gonna lose you."

"Jack, I don't mean to be crass, but how is that all that different from anyone else? Last night I thought I lost you. I know what you'll be feeling if you lose me one day. I know it's not a matter of 'if' for you, but there are a lot of people in the world who know their loved one isn't going to be with them for long. Loss is a fact of life, it's something we all have to live with. Not forever, no, but I don't imagine anyone's ever thought that knowing they'll, too, die one day makes it easier. That sort of thing is generally considered a warning sign for suicide."

Jack was quiet for a long time. "I know that's true, but I guess I never really thought of it. Maybe I can be a little self-absorbed sometimes. Over the years, I've kind of adopted a strike-first approach when my stupid heart leads me astray."

Ianto held Jack tighter. "I'm sorry you've had to put up such walls, Jack," he whispered. "I think you've got such a big heart, and I think it's terrible that people have taken advantage of it."

All at once, Jack felt something inside him shift. He tried to fight it but it was no use, walls he hadn't even realized he was hiding behind were crumbling at such a rate that he could swear it hurt as physically as coming back to life. All he could do was cling to Ianto and hope the man didn't think less of him.

"You think I've got a big heart?" Jack whispered through bitter tears. "There are so many people who don't believe I ever had any heart."

"They're wrong, cariad. So wrong," Ianto soothed. "I think you'd… gone already, last night, didn't hear me… but I meant it, it wasn't just shock or grief, because I've been feeling it for a while now and…." Ianto took a deep breath and shifted away just enough to meet Jack's eyes. "I love you."

For a moment, Jack looked stunned as if that was the last thing he was expecting Ianto to say. Then he clutched Ianto tightly to him as if refusing to ever let go of him. "I love you, too, Ianto. I love you, too."