Chapter 4:

Xena and Gabrielle sat in silence by the campfire, as it seemed they so often did of late. Xena couldn't help but notice that every time she looked up from the drying of herbs and roots she had gathered that Gabrielle was gazing at the sleeping woman. Ever since she had fallen back asleep, the sound of Gabrielle's voice was quieted. Xena remembered evening's when the bard had spoken deep into the night, pondering questions, telling stories.

Whenever she felt Xena's glance, Gabrielle would smile at her. This did not help alleviate the small gnawing feeling in the back of Xena's skull. Xena scowled into the fire, she was being foolish. Xena knew that Gabrielle must be fascinated by the stranger with silver eyes. She was an attractive woman, despite the condition that they had found her in. The first time Xena had met that straight forward gaze, she herself had felt an odd tug in the pit of her stomach. Xena wasn't used to being on the receiving end of eyes as electrifying as her own. Was Gabrielle enthralled by those moon kissed eyes? She shouldn't be jealous, she had no right. After all they had been through, Xena wondered why she should doubt the depth of the young bard's love. Although she might not blame her - a flicker of guilt at the recent horrors that had taken place between them.

Gabrielle was acutely aware of Xena's silence. How was it that the words failed her whenever she needed to speak to the warrior these days? Both of them still tended emotional wounds, so they were cautious now with each other. Gabrielle sighed, not unlike dogs that had been beaten down and now flinched at any sound. Guilt burdened them both, they had left their hatred behind in Illusia but there was no immediate tonic for the things they had said and done before their arrival to the whimsical place. Even with Solan's gift, they had so much left to heal. Gabrielle watched Xena work at sorting and separating the various items, the only time Xena seemed to look up was when she was checking on the sleeping woman. Everything had been fine today for most of the afternoon, even after the arrival of the woman.

Gabrielle smiled sadly to herself, maybe this wounded traveler had put a damper on Xena's plan for their evening. Not very likely, they had not been intimate on a regular basis, the touch of the other felt too raw, exposed the nerve and then dug in. Gabrielle cleared her throat, the sad smile still on her face when Xena looked up.

"Was dinner all-right, even if it was bread and cheese again?" She asked conversationally.

Xena nodded and went back to organizing her medicine pouch. Gabrielle didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Instead, she moved to sit beside Xena, resting her arm gently on the well muscled forearm.

"Xena? Who do you think did this to her?" Xena looked at the delicate hand on her arm and sighed softly to herself. How long would this gap exist between them? She had no reason to be angry at Gabrielle, even if Gabrielle was attracted to the stranger. No, that would just be an excuse for not dealing with the everything else that hung between them before the arrival of the stranger. Noticing that someone was striking was not the same as wanting to be with them. She turned her head to look into Gabrielle's eyes, the sadness and love she saw made her heart ache.

"I can't say. When she recovers a bit of her strength, we can ask her. Find out if it is a fight worth engaging in or if our paths should part as soon as she is a bit better." Xena replied, answering the spoken question, not the unspoken one.

"What about that scar on her chest? Did you see it?" Gabrielle played along, it was easier to talk about the woman than to sit in silence.

"I did. My guess, is that it is some sort of mark indicating a rank or membership to something." Xena speculated, her voice soft.

"No." Both Xena and Gabrielle turned towards the sound of Ankh's voice, a little less hoarse but not much. "How are you feeling?" Xena asked in a neutral voice.

Ankh did not miss the tone, or lack thereof, but couldn't understand why it would be there. "Feeling a bit more human." Her lips curved into a small smile. "Then we can move you towards the fire." Xena stood and moved towards Ankh.

"And I found this shift, it isn't much, but it should be enough until we get to the next village." Gabrielle followed Xena to their guest. "Thank you both." Ankh murmured as she tried to rise, lurching forward instead.

Xena caught her by the elbow and steadied her while Gabrielle slipped around with the shift.

Xena watched as Gabrielle slid the worn fabric over the other woman's head. Once the shift was on, the warrior picked Ankh up easily and carried her over near the fire.

"Thank you again." Ankh smiled weakly as Xena set her down.

"How long have you two..." Ankh started to ask before she caught the look in the warrior's eyes. "Traveled together?" she finished the question seamlessly. The pain in her gut gone, she noticed what she had not noticed before, a tension...No, that wasn't the word. Something between the two women was out of sync. For some reason, Ankh didn't know why, the thought made her sad.

Gabrielle smiled a genuine smile, launching into the tale of when and how she had first met Xena. Telling the tale, Gabrielle remembered when she had first seen the imposing warrior. Standing before the slaver, in nothing more than her shift. All grace and fury as she dispatched the slavers. And when she saw her before the villagers of her home town, so proud and yet refusing to fight back, even if they would have stoned her to death. When she spoke of the moment that she found Xena in her brother's crypt, Gabrielle paused. The look in those blue eyes, she could still remember what she thought to herself that day, that no matter what, she wanted to be there for this troubled woman. She wanted to keep her promise to the glimmer of hope that flashed in those cerulean deep eyes. Gabrielle ended her tale with, "And since that day, I couldn't imagine my life without the Warrior Princess." Over Ankh's head, she saw Xena gazing hard at her.

Ankh smiled and chuckled appreciatively, ignoring the exchange that took place above her. She was, if nothing else, a good audience. "Now you tell us a story." Gabrielle said, glancing back down at Ankh. It was a rare pleasure to find someone who had stories to tell. Xena spoke before she thought to stop herself. "Perhaps you could tell us the story about who would poison you and leave you by the side of the road in a place you are not native too."

The tension returned to Ankh's body and the easy smile disappeared from her face.

"They are one and the same warrior. There is no need to trouble you with details. This is not a battle you need to concern yourself with. I offer my thanks for your kindness, the warmth of your fire and am indebted to you for your healing. As soon as I can, I will find a way to repay your kindness."

Gabrielle shot a sharp look at Xena before placing her hand gently on Ankh's shoulder. How was it that she found herself with not one but two obstinate warriors? She knew the look on Ankh's face, had seen it often enough on Xena's. Closed and hard...Did they honestly believe this effectively dispelled the shadow that still lingered in their gazes? "Ankh, you don't need to tell us anything. It is just that, well, whoever did this to you has no great fondness for you. And I think we are beginning to develop one." Gabrielle said smoothly.

Ankh sighed and relaxed back into the make shift bed. "My apologies gentle bard, and to you as well warrior. I am still not quite...myself. I do not act as a traveler thankful for such kind and gracious company." Ankh offered another smile.

Gabrielle replied, laughing, "Apology accepted. I don't know how pleasant I would be if I had spent all day heaving my guts out!" Ankh burst out laughing, and even Xena chuckled at Gabrielle's tone.

Xena brought out another longer piece of the valerkah root and handed it to Ankh. "This should help you sleep through the night, and tomorrow we'll find steam caves that are near here. The other details can wait until then." She offered a small smile which Ankh returned as she took the root from Xena and slipped it into her mouth.

"Perhaps, tomorrow, on the way to the caves, I can tell you what you'd like to know. Right now, I would like to blissfully await the sleep that the valerkah root should bring. Again, I am indebted to you both."

Gabrielle nodded, and Xena gave a curt nod before Ankh rolled away from the fire and settled in. Xena still could not meet Gabrielle's gaze as the young woman turned back towards her. Gabrielle leaned over and kissed Xena on the cheek, "I am going to set up the bedrolls." She murmured as she moved past the warrior. Xena looked after her lover, no admonition, no reproach. There rarely ever was, even after the scene at the top of the cliff. Even after her journey to the temple of Mnesymone. Xena checked over the small bundles and piles she had made. Satisfied, she went and checked on Argo and their supplies. She made a quick sweep around their campsite before she made her way back to where Gabrielle was waiting, already nestled beneath one of the covers. Their bedrolls side by side. Xena shook her head, chiding herself and her unease as she began to take off her armor.

Gabrielle turned towards Xena as she heard the sounds of the warrior taking off her armor and setting her sword and chakram within easy reach. Xena slipped beneath her blanket and lay staring at the stars. This was the time when the night spread before them, not as a welcome respite from the day, but the unwelcome reminder of the things they still left unsaid. "Xena." Gabrielle whispered, gazing at the profile of the beautiful woman beside her. Telling the stories to Ankh had released a sort of ache in her heart. An ache for what had been...What still was. Who would she be lying to if she said that she didn't want to be with Xena?

"Yes, Gabrielle." Xena replied, not trusting herself to turn towards the sweet sound of her lover's voice.

"Are you attracted to Ankh?"

The question hung between them for a moment. Xena almost wanted to laugh at the absurdity of the question. It was the last thing she was prepared for. "No!"

"Do you think I am?" Gabrielle continued, reaching out to touch Xena's smooth shoulder. The warmth of the soft skin comforted Gabrielle.

"Are you?" Xena asked as evenly as possible. This was not what the conversation was really about though, and they both knew it.

"Xena. My warrior princess..." Gabrielle murmured, letting her fingers glide across the shoulder to trace the still woman's collarbone.

Xena put her hands over bard's roaming fingers. She turned to face Gabrielle.

"Gabrielle..." She said in a soft voice.

"I know Xena, I know. Do you still think me such a child?" Gabrielle moved her hand to cup the warrior's face, gazing into night shadowed eyes. "No, you aren't a child. I would understand if...Just for...I mean, she isn't unattractive, and even in her current condition she has an air..." Xena let the words pour out of her.

Gabrielle put her finger over those soft lips. Lips she had lain awake so many nights and wished to kiss. "Xena of Anthipolis, what do I have to say to you to make you understand? You are all I wanted. How would I move without my soul touching against yours? How could I ever unweave you from me? How should I withhold myself so that my depths do not vibrate at your presence and still at your absence? Sweet love of mine, how?" Gabrielle whispered softly. She knew that she meant it. The three days after Solan and Hope's death, when the woman she loved turned away from her, and the knowledge of all that had happened burdened her so. So much anger and pain, and threaded through it, the thing that scared her the most was that she had truly lost Xena. Lost her for good and that fear motivated everything else. Trying to lay blame. A wounded animal knows only to strike and that was what she wanted. She wanted Xena to know...How much everything hurt, but especially how much it hurt when Xena turned away. Xena's heart melted at Gabrielle's words. She wrapped her fingers around the hand that hovered before her lips. She leaned over and kissed the woman beside her. Infusing it with the love that filled her heart for this young woman, the love that had marked her heart as belonging to this one and this one only. The two women settled more comfortably against each other, resuming their communion of lips and tongues. Rediscovering what eluded them so many nights previously. Ankh drowsily heard the soft murmuring and then the silence punctuated by their kissing and soft sighs. "I cannot involve these women in my troubles. Love is fleeting and hard enough even in the best of times." Unbidden, Ankh felt a pang of guilt. She hadn't even thought of her lover since her arrival here. Before she could think of what she was going to do, the valerkah root took effect and she melted into sleep.