Hi guys this is a new chapter after a really long hiatus. I'm really sorry but it will go on like this. This chapter was pretty hard for me to write so if you don't mind leave a comment and tell me what to think. I hope you like it. Please enjoy!
Disclaimer: everything regarding Harry Potter belongs to J.K. Rowling
"We've all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That's who we really are."
J. K. Rowling in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
The bitter cold bites itself a victory march inside her chest; the heat, the fire the only thing she takes in. It makes the oxygen in her blood crack, makes it useless for her to breath, the inside of her mouth tastes suddenly like iron and acid. The warmth of her breath, which she disturbs as she dashes through it before it can fade, disappear into the darkness; the sharp scrunch her feet cause while she darts all the way back to the house and breaks the fine net of ice covering the muddy path, even her anger is less prominent now, because it has to make room for the headless panic that erupts in her belly and gets fuelled by the cold.
She lets herself be guided by moonlight, which illuminates her way with splashes of milky light, by the pattern that big paws left on the ground, by the pitched aggressive noises slicing the quiet hours of night into pieces.
More heat develops in her chest as it gets stuffy and clammy in her coat reminding her all too well that she spends most of her free-time on her buttocks surrounded by silence and dust and not out in the open bustling around in nature. She will be exhausted before she even arrives at whatever dreadful scenario awaits her in the opaque distance. Somehow, though, Delphine's finally honest speech trickles into her mind, or another bunch of honest lies. Admittedly her outburst might have been a bit harsh, an immediate emotion loaded reaction to the betrayal, void of any rational thought, a verbalization of a pain she doesn't deserve but right then she felt used, like an object, its value lasting only until it wouldn't be needed anymore. That Delphine was able to manipulate her like that without ever showing her true intentions breaks her heart more than the act itself and that she was used in order to probably hurt other people, people, which may be her family tonight, is the worst.
On top of it all, Delphine tried to save herself with a shady story about double-agents and unwanted sudden transfiguration that is what makes her angry beyond belief. The betrayal makes her want to cry, to feel filthy and to some extant ashamed that she didn't see it coming, however, Delphine's fantastic story makes her blood boil with red, deep red anger.
All the same, something more gets mixed into this already unhealthy constellation and that is fear; fear not only for her family that she neither sees nor hears, yet and for Delphine, too. All this is swirling through her body like a raging storm and pushes her to go faster and faster until she is almost stumbling towards her home.
All of a sudden she feels movement in the darkness more than she actually sees it. The gaping black hole on her right begins to pulse in gentle ripples, they spread until the whole mass of nothingness is swaying. The lake is coming to life, the water bursts its banks, crawls onto the land; a black, greedy monster stretching its claws out for her, then it lifts into the sky, momentarily blocks the moon and aims in a rotating unpredictable spiral for the far end of the lake, for a house that is not able to withstand its force. From somewhere in the darkness echoes a laugh that has nothing to do with happiness.
A fire explodes in the night, the reed on the shore is ablaze, and eventually Cosima plunges head first into a scene straight from a worst nightmare.
The house, her home filled to the brim with memories and people, which keep her from drifting from losing her grip on reality, vanished has been swallowed by a furious raging cyclone. Black water surges against the ancient windows; the breaking of the glass is the first thing that drowns, then it proceeds with unstoppable force to sink into the lungs of the humans trapped inside, to drown everything in its way. Cosima can only stare and gape, too shocked to think too shocked to act before her attention has to focus somewhere else.
The sound is nearer now, not a hundred steps away, and it sends vicious chills down her spine. It is this laugh and not the cold that tries to find its way back between her clothes. The laugh is sharp and unmelodic and crazy, the kind of crazy like Bellatrix Lestrange and Cosima thinks disgusted that every Death Eater has to laugh like that because they are all crazy because every other laugh is too good for them.
The amused man is looking as mad as he sounds. He is standing in the flickering halo the burning reed casts on the ground, light and darkness are playing hide and seek on his pale skin. His hair is dirty and unkempt, falls into his face, which he doesn't mind, its colour the only nice thing about it, its hue the same as her favorite kind of blonde. In the moving light she cannot make out much more than that, barring his lanky slender, too slender frame, which sways in the rhythm of the flames and his raddled worn-out cloak. He claps his hands, clearly overjoyed by something and addresses someone outside the fluttering halo:
"This is fantastic, don't you think? Don't you think?"
The shadows emit a gruff grunt.
Cosima stands just outside the forsaken light, shivering and scared not knowing what she is supposed to do now, the gears in her head paralyzed by what she sees. The fight in the Ministry of Magic had been her only real fight so far, one she survived only because of the help of others, because they had been in there together, because Harry Potter had been there with them to guide them to lend them his bravery and carry their fears. But now she is all alone, full of fear without a quench of courage in her shaking bones abandoned by her lying lover, apart from her dying family.
She has so much knowledge, she reads so many books, bravery, though, is not something that can be learned from a book, looked up like a scientific term you can recall how to use only by remembering it. Bravery is born in the moment, nurtured by decisions whose outcome is unknown and grows and flourishes when others shy away.
She can either save herself by stealing back into the blackness or she can step up to these foreign wizards these Bellatrix-Lestrange-mad wizards who are just about to kill her sisters and her foster-mother. Sometimes bravery also means to be an idiot who casts aside all warnings naively thinking that dying is something others do.
Cosima steps into the light, wand in one shaking hand, clinging to her anger for it is better than being scared:
"Expulso!"
For a split second it looks as if her curse would hit its target right on the spot but before Cosima can actually begin to feel relieved the blonde wizard heard and saw her. Languidly he flicks his wrist and the curse drips in long red tears into the muddy grass.
"And who do we have here?"
It's like she didn't just try to blow him up, if anything he appears slightly surprised that she stands in front of him. His face is a mask of indifference; annoyance is probably the emotion that simmers the closest beneath his skin, since Cosima disturbed him. Cosima's arm begins to shake more violently because the man doesn't seem to care at all that she attacked him. He isn't alerted, he isn't scared, he looks at her as if she were a fly that kept him from biting into a piece of pie.
"You are not the girl I expected. Who are you little brat? Does the Irish bitch have children now?"
His voice resonates in a familiar way, one she heard before surrounded by muddy grass and moist wood, in the end, fear chases her thoughts away and she can't remember. Cosima has no idea what he is talking about and it takes all her willpower and concentration to not drop her wand and cower on the ground. Something rustles in the shadows and they answer the crazy wizard, who looks not much older than Delphine, in a voice that rings another forgotten memory in Cosima's head:
"Who cares if she does? Just kill her and we get over with this."
"But we're here to find my dear sister, Walden. Maybe she knows where to find her." The blonde argues.
Delphine's name explodes loud and clear and Cosima's mind while she battles with herself if her shaking knees can keep her upright any second longer or if she should simply wait for the green flash to end her existence. Out of nowhere she remembers how she ran away from the biggest, most unkind bullies in elementary school. Back then she ended up sitting in a tree without any explanation how she got there but at least not one of the bullies had been able to follow her. She had been really scared that day, so scared, in fact, that she could only run away. Right now that is all she wants to do, too but a tree won't save her this time. In her despair she must have mumbled her lost girlfriend's name, the only other explanation would be that one of the assaulters entered her thoughts and she didn't notice it.
The young man is still partly hidden by shadows, nonetheless, Cosima feels how his expression changes, how he reeks of excitement and violence.
"So you know where she is. Tell me: Where is my sister? Where is Delphine?"
If this is Delphine's brother then maybe her unbelievable story about her parents could be true, in the end. And if that is the case then maybe the rest could be true just the same. All of a sudden Cosima wishes she had listened a little longer to her girlfriend maybe then she wouldn't be so confused and feel so alone right now. Her heart is beating so loud she barely understands her own words:
"I don't know."
Delphine's brother grimaces:
"I judged you as a smart girl; you look like you could be in Ravenclaw. How disappointing."
The next second green thunder detonates in the air and Cosima has barely time to react so it doesn't knock her off her feet or does something worst to her, like a flame freezing charm.
"I really have no clue." Cosima pants, the irony is she really hasn't.
"Liar!" the French booms at her, makes her ears ring, hurls another curse at her. Cosima comes to realize that she has no chance against this man, not alone and most of all not against both.
She is a brilliant witch, she knows that, additionally her grades speak for themselves that she can keep up with Hermione Granger speaks for itself, she is a member of DA, however, she doesn't have the same experience as Granger and even less as Potter. She is good at school but this is something no one ever prepared her for. She knows it is egoistically but she wishes someone else was here with her, someone who tells her that she will see another dawn.
"I am sure you know something. If we just…tickle you at the right spot you will tell us." The blonde says while his eyes glimmer with something horrifying. In one fluid motion he raises his wand into the air and screams:
"Crucio!"
But before the curse can burst from the tip of his wand a massive shadow emerges from the lake side, hits the surprised wizard with full force and they roll into the reed that is not yet on fire. Cosima seizes her opportunity and casts another explosive curse in the direction where she assumes the second man.
"How dare you!" a deep voice shouts at her then a beast of a man breaks away from the darkness as wild and dirty as the first. One angry eye stares Cosima down when she eventually remembers who this second man is. Walden McNair launches one curse after another at her in his fury while she does her best to keep them from reaching her. Sparks rain down on her from the splintered curses they warm her cloak and scorch the sensitive skin on her hand. Sound and light wash over them from the lake shore where the reed stands close and thick as a forest. Cosima doesn't know where she should turn her head, where she should cast her spells, she does and acts and is pleased that she can't think one coherent thought because the adrenaline pumping through her blood washes them all away. She blocks another flash, screams when it burns her elbow and tosses one right back. She is still standing, alive, but not for much longer.
More noise reaches the duo: laughter, screams and howling. It makes Cosima shiver in the heat of the flames for she knows now who duels in the reed. Delphine had to be the one who jumped to her side and is chasing her brother on the dry lake ground. Cosima doesn't forgive her, no way; however, she is glad to know that Delphine is near, that she puts herself between Cosima and her own brother. Somehow knowing this makes Cosima grab her wand a bit tighter, makes her feel a little braver, makes her stubbornly think that she has to get out of here alive at least to give Delphine hell. Her girlfriend must be giving her older brother quite the hard time because the water mass rotating around the house slowly collapses in on itself.
The moment Cosima looks up so she doesn't get hit by anything McNair casts an Incarcerus curse at her. This time she has no chance to protect herself and the next second she crashes to the ground her glasses bend dangerously and the ropes cut painfully into the flesh of her ankles and her chest.
This is going to be it, she thinks in a frenzy. Her hot breath fogs her glasses hence she doesn't see him coming but she wouldn't anyway because she squeezes her eyes shut tight. She thinks about Siobhan and her sisters and Delphine and that she doesn't want to die. In the distance someone screams in agony, maybe it's herself and she is already dead, detached from her body for she doesn't feel any pain, only fear. However, the pain doesn't come only the one from the strings around her body remains.
Suddenly she hears familiar voices around her:
"Cosima? Cos, where are you?" Sarah calls out to her.
"Sarah! Sarah! I'm here…here!" she answers but she can't breathe properly, can't inhale and she is scared that Sarah won't hear her.
Nonetheless, she feels a hand on her shoulder and when she jerks away she picks up her sister's rough voice:
"Oi, Cos. It's me. It's okay."
When Sarah releases her with the help of the Finite charm Cosima gulps down fistfuls of air and winces as she puts pressure on her elbow:
"What the fuck is going on here?" Sarah asks angrily crouched beside her.
"Death Eaters…Mc Nair and…and Delphine's brother…" Cosima heaves.
"What the hell?" Sarah exclaims just before another explosion goes off in the night.
"I have to find Delphine…" Cosima mumbles and gets back on her feet.
"What is happening here, Cos. The house is ruined, the lake is burning, you're hurt. Where is Delphine? What happened?"
"She betrayed me." Cosima says bitterly while she takes off in a sprint towards the lake shore. On her way she passes Helena and McNair in a heated duel with sparks flying all around them.
Between the high stalks of the reed it is pitch-black and cold; the fire is only a glimmer in Cosima's back that gets smaller and smaller. Her feet are soaked because the water is slowly flowing back into the lake and noise is all around her what makes it hard for her to orient. Every shadow is another Death Eater, every green light in the night sky is a forbidden curse, and every rustle makes her heart stop and turn around ready to cast a curse at a reed.
The second she reaches the end of the reed, though, and steps into the dry lake she sees Delphine and her brother several yards in front of her. Cosima can see that they are almost equal to each other, almost since right now Delphine's brother hits her with a strong curse and before his sister hits the ground she morphs back into her human shape. Cosima is still angry but she doesn't know what would happen, if the body in the muddy water wouldn't move anymore. She feels bile rising in her throat, stinging, mixing with the blood in the corner of her mouth.
When she is close enough Cosima hurls the strongest curse at the mad-man she can think of and sends him flying. At Delphine's side she drops down into the sand beside her, calls her name and tries to lift her from the lakebed:
"What are you doing?" Delphine croaks clearly exhausted. Water soaked her hair and clothes, mud and sand is smeared across her face in an odd red, only lying on the ground seems to be painful.
"I am pissed at you but I don't want you to die." Cosima answers gruffly as they stand up on shaking legs.
Another curse burns the ground several feet beside them:
"Now I know what this is all about, ma petite chatte."
"You know nothing, Francois. Let her go. She has nothing to do with this." Delphine tells him determining, though, Cosima can see the fear in her dark eyes, hears and notices her shaking.
"Oh, ma sœur. She has everything to do with this." He yells angrily.
Delphine pushes Cosima into the knee-deep water then suddenly she tastes fur in her mouth and hears an animal wail. Blood mixes with the water, both too dark to distinguish one from the other; however, the iron smell tells her that it is there. Delphine advances again onto her brother in whatever she morphed into and Cosima supports her with whatever spell she can think of currently.
It shows that together they have a fairly good chance against Francois and when the water reaches past their knees he attacks them with a Fiendfyre.
In boiling deep orange and bright red the flames browse over the lakebed and Cosima can cast an Extinguishing Spell just in time for them to not get roasted.
"Don't think that this is over, Delphine! Now I know where to find you and that you have no loyalty!" Francois shouts at the two girls then he ascends into the night sky in a black cloud where he gets joined by McNair.
Just like that the two are gone as fast as they came.
For a couple of moments Cosima thinks, I'm alive, I'm alive, I'm alive and keeps her wand pointed to the spot where Francois vanished. Now that it's over the air is calm and clean again and what happened is too unreal for the Ravenclaw to grasp it. Everything is going back to normal, except that it is not and if they don't hurry Cosima and Delphine have to swim back to the shore. The water rapidly climbs up their bodies, now it is reaching their thighs; its coldness makes Cosima's toes numb and her movements cumbersome. Wasn't she supposed to be sitting in front of a crackling fire with a lazy smile on her face already on her way to dream-land?
Wordlessly she puts her wand away and turns around to Delphine; Delphine the lover, the deceiver, the traitor. Mixed feelings bubble up in her belly, though; it is not the time now to dwell on them.
Delphine looks close to collapsing when Cosima puts an arm around her waist and they begin to wade to the shore:
"Let's get you back to the house."
When they arrive in front of The Birdwatchers Helena and Sarah are already waiting for them.
Their faces are smudged and their clothes dark and tacky with soot. Neither of them looks happy.
"Expelliarmus." Helena shouts and Delphine's wand goes sailing into Sarah's waiting hand.
"Now tell me, Cosima. What. The. Fucking. Hell. Is. Going. On!" Sarah rumbles with grinding teeth.
Now that the adrenaline gradually leaves her body Cosima feels the toll the past hour took on her for the first time. She is aching all over, her elbow throbs painfully and is funnily numb at the same time and the anger doesn't pass, although, it served its purpose to keep her alive. She doesn't feel like explaining anything to her sisters, strangely she wants to be alone with Delphine, not to argue and be sad, simply to be with her. Cosima's fingers bury deeper into the soaked fabric of Delphine's coat:
"The two Death Eaters were Walden Mc Nair and Delphine's brother, Francois. I….she…she fooled me. She's a spy for you-know-who and…I'm so sorry Sarah…I'm such an idiot…" Cosima whispers, too ashamed to look up, too fed up with this whole day for more emotional turmoil. She wants to crawl in bed and forget all about this day, about these past months and about Delphine Cormier. But she wants her in the same bed, still.
Sarah looks close to punching Delphine and hugging her sister, she settles for pushing the blonde's wand into the back-pocket of her trousers and snarls:
"So this whole shitty night is her fault?"
Cosima nods, her fingers twisting deeper into her girlfriend's coat, sensing something warmer and thicker than water. She can feel how Delphine tries to remove herself from the comfort, the support how she tries to twist away and Cosima wishes she was able to let it happen:
"Then what is she still doing here?" Sarah barks sounding just as betrayed and hurt as Cosima not so long ago.
"She's hurt." Is all the Ravenclaw says before they limp into the house.
Inside Siobhan, Alison, Beth and Rachel dry-charmed everything and water is still sidling as a thin trickle through the door. Everyone was looking at the small group with big eyes and matching scared faces:
"What happened?" Allison whispers her arms wrapped tightly around Beth's, her eyes the biggest of them all.
"Not now." Cosima grumbles while Sarah roars: "Delphine is a traitor. She knew the Death Eaters. This whole shit is her fault!" Cosima wants for her to shut up but her sister is too noisy with being furious for the Ravenclaw. Sarah judges fast and takes long to trust, it has always been like that and sometimes Cosima wonders what happened before they met at age eleven.
Delphine looks like she wants to be anywhere else right now than in this room but Cosima doesn't give her a chance to flee, not yet. She needs to clear head. To debate whether the betrayal was too harsh and pushing her girlfriend away the only real consequence or if the consequences have to change if Delphine's story is true.
However, she can't decide this now. Her impulse tells her to get as far away from the French as she can, though her irrational side stubbornly disagrees.
She lays Delphine gently on a couch near the fireplace that is already dry:
"Siobhan, I know this is a lot I'm asking but…she is hurt…please…I'm sorry but please…" Cosima mumbles, unsure whether what she does is too much for her or the right thing to do. She stands up when Delphine touches her arm:
"Cosima let me explain."
Cosima rips her arm away and bristles:
"Don't talk to me. I'm going to ask Tonks if your story is true. If it's not I never ever want to see you again."
tbc.