A/N: I'm sorry this is so late! I was busy packing and moving into my apartment at university. I promise I'll update more frequently! Thanks for bearing with me and not yelling because I was bad and didn't post chapters! I love you all! As always, please review! :D

Chapter 12: Rollercoaster

When Severus retired for the night, his chest ached with guilt as the note burned in his pocket. Harry and Draco were so happy, I couldn't have given this to them now, he thought sadly, staring at his bed. He ran his fingertips over the silken sheets and slowly sat upon the edge. The wood creaked with age; Severus didn't mind, the sound comforted him. He pulled out the bloodied letter and read it, nearly entirely by memory. He was shocked at how the words seemed permanently seared into his mind.

Severus,
I regret to inform you that your godson is now entirely your responsibility. You see, I found out a bit of interesting information. Draco is gay. Severus, you know perfectly well that I cannot have a gay son, but I also cannot be bothered to kill him. I am aware that you have no qualms against homosexuals, therefore I assume you'll, no doubt, make sure he's fed. I notified the dark lord of this unfortunate development, but he seemed to be unfazed, so much so that I was humiliated at the meeting. And I was quite surprised to not see you there, Severus. Where might you be these days? Perhaps you'll never receive this message in time, pity. Draco is not to return home before the start of lessons. Should he try, he will be incinerated upon his entry. You'll see to it that he does not return home. However, Draco is to return to Hogwarts at the start of term. Should you wittiness him engaging in behaviors in which he should not (according to my rule) you are you inform me at once! Should I learn you have not complied with my terms I shall see to your punishment.
Lucius Malfoy

He set the letter on his bedside table with a sigh. While he knew Draco despised his father, he also knew that he would do his best to impress the man. Severus worried what Draco would do to Harry once he learned of the letter. He shuddered. With those thoughts, sleep claimed him. His nightmares ran wild all night.

Harry woke first and rolled over to stare at the blonde angel beside him. Draco's head was nestled on his ribs, his blonde hair tickled Harry's skin. He smiled as he thought about how much blonder his hair looked when it was laying across his pale chest. Harry traced his fingers around the golden locks, taking care to not wake the other boy. Draco sleepily opened his eyes and looked up. "Well good morning," he whispered. "I didn't wake you, did I?" He shook his head and burrowed back into Harry's ribs. "Come on," he said, playfully shoving the blonde off him.

"Noooo," he whined into the sheets as Harry moved away.

"What?" He asked, smirking.

"Stay!" Draco's voice was still muffled by the blankets.

"Fine," Harry said as he climbed into bed and pulled Draco's head onto his chest. "Better?"

"Yes," he said, snuggling into the bony ribs.

"How can you like that? I'm so skeletal," Harry asked after a few minutes.

"Come 'ere," he replied, sitting up and leaning back on pillows. Draco guided Harry's head to his chest and felt him relax into him.

"Oh…. This is nice," he said quietly. Draco just smiled and stroked his hair contentedly.

A knock at the door disturbed them. "Come in!" Draco called. Severus stepped in carrying a tray of food.

"Breakfast," he said slowly, setting the tray on the table next to the blonde.

"Thanks!" They said in unison, Harry still laying on the other boy's chest.

"You're welcome. Once you've finished your breakfast, meet me in the library," Snape said softly as he left. The door clicked behind him as Draco studied the food. He found something incredibly appealing; strawberries. His free hand moved over to the tray and he took the fruit gently in his hand. He held it out to Harry to see and the raven-haired one opened his mouth.

"Ah, ah, ah," Draco teased in a whisper, "not yet." He leaned down and took a bite of the strawberry, getting the juice on his lips. Once he swallowed he pressed his lips to his. Harry flicked his tongue out to taste the strawberries on his love's lips. Draco purred as he moved so Harry was beneath him. He trailed kisses from Harry's jaw, down his neck and to his chest. Just as Harry was starting to enjoy the sensation, Draco pulled back. Moments later, something slick was on his chest, sliding around his nipples, down to his stomach and back up. Harry opened his eyes to see Draco covering him in strawberry. He looked at him questioningly but the blonde just smiled and continued his task. Once Draco finished, he got to the fun part. He brought his tongue down in the same path he did the fruit. Harry moaned as he felt his cock grow hard against Draco's leg. "Someone's very excited today," he said, smirking as strawberry juice dripped from his chin. He nipped Harry's collarbone as his nails lightly traced the boy's ribs, his own erection growing. Finally, he couldn't resist anymore. Draco tugged off Harry's plaid, threadbare boxers, marveling at the sight therein. Harry blushed slightly as he admired him. To distract the blonde, he pulled his silky, black, Egyptian cotton boxers down ever so slightly. He traced the blonde hair until it disappeared into the sea of silk. His plan worked, Draco stared at him with desire, as he'd only just remembered what they were about to do. He slid them the rest of the way off and smiled at Harry. "Are you sure you want this?" He nodded. "Positive?" Another nod. "Is this your first time?" Yet another nod. "I won't hurt you," he said softly as Harry recoiled slightly. The Gryffindor smiled and kiss him again. Draco laughed into the kiss as he grabbed Harry's ass, making him gasp. "Ready?"

"For you? Always," he whispered in the blonde's ear. A smile, a true smile, made its way across Draco's face as he reached for his wand. He waved it and Harry felt a cool, slick substance coat him. He shivered. Draco pulled him closer and kissed him once more, his tongue dancing with Harry's. While the Gryffindor was distracted, he stuck a finger in his arse. Harry didn't seem to notice, so he added another. This time, he hissed.

"Doing okay?" Harry nodded. "Tell me if I'm hurting you, okay?" He nodded again as Draco maneuvered him to a better position. He was on his hands and knees, his hands splayed beneath. Harry felt Draco's hands caress his shoulders, move down his back, and stop at his hips. Draco positioned himself at Harry's entrance and gently entered. The other boy hissed, but said nothing, so the blonde continued inching in as he ran his nails lightly down Harry's back. The Gryffindor clenched his teeth as the Slytherin slipped in, he wanted this. He knew there would be pleasure if he could get through the pain. And he thought something else, I like the pain. The thought worried him, but before he had time to think about it, Draco thrust into his prostate. Harry screamed as pleasure and pain surged through him. The Slytherin went faster and faster, their breathing and heart-rates sly-rocketed. Both came simultaneously, screaming each other's names. Draco collapsed beside Harry, still breathing heavily. He pulled the Gryffindor into his lap and cradled his head. Once they had their breath back, he smiled down at him. "Did you like it," he asked, with a bit of worry in his voice.

"I loved it," he purred. "And you," he added, in a whisper, after a few minutes.

"I love you too," Draco said softly, running his fingers though Harry's hair. There was a knot in his throat. That was the first time he'd said those words— to someone that wasn't his mother—and meant them. Harry pulled himself from the blonde's chest and smiled at him. He pressed a kiss to each tear that fell from Draco's eyes.

"Don't cry… what's wrong?"

"I've just never told anyone I love them… and meant it. Except for my mum, but she's gone now."

"I'm sorry," Harry said sadly, pulling Draco to him. "I'm here, I'm not much, but I'm here."

"You're more than I could ask for, Harry," he whispered into the raven hair. Harry hugged him closer.

"And you, me."

After half an hour, the two got up and dressed. They walked to the library where they found Snape with a glass of Firewhiskey. "Isn't it a bit early for that?" Draco asked, smirking. His smirk faded when Severus turned to face them.

"It was the only way I could give you this," he said solemnly, holding out a bloody piece of parchment. Draco took it and read it, his eyes filled with tears. Harry looked at him quizzically and he thrust the no into his hands. He read the letter and put an arm around Draco-the blonde threw it off. Harry recoiled, not knowing what he did. It dawned on him. Draco still wants to make his father –that bloody bastard—proud. He turned away from the two Slytherins and stalked to the door. With a final glance, Harry threw open the door and ran. He ran until he collapsed. Of course he wouldn't want you. Who would want you? No matter where you fucking go, you'll never be loved. You don't deserve to be loved—you're worthless. You're scum. His mind continued chanting such things until he fainted.

Severus looked at the blonde sadly for several minutes. He was vaguely aware that the door had slammed and Harry left. "I'm sorry," he said finally.

"I don't care what my father thinks," Draco replied in a monotone.

"Don't you? You just threw off Potter's arm without realizing it," he noted.

"Harry," he corrected, looking around. "Where is he?"

"He left."

"What do you mean left?"

Realization started sinking into Severus. "He left, he bolted from the door." Adrenaline was kicking in, forcing his mind to work faster through the sluggish haze of alcohol.

"Shit! Where do you think he went?"

"How should I know?!"

"We have to find him!" Draco practically screamed, running to the door. Snape grabbed the back of his shirt, stopping him.

"We haven't a clue where he is. Sit," his instructed, summoning a sobering draught. He downed in and inhaled deeply, enjoying the clearness of his mind. Draco looked up ad in impatiently from his spot on the couch. "Think Draco, where would Harry go?"

"I don't know!" He shouted in exasperation and worry. "I don't know!" Severus opened his mouth to speak but the echo of a scream interrupted him. "Harry!" Draco called helplessly. He turned to Snape with pleading eyes.

"We'll find him," Severus said as he followed Draco through the door.