AN: Happy New Year, everyone! I'll keep this short. Enjoy the chapter, it's the longest yet for this story. Also, for those that have been waiting, you are finally getting what you wanted. I even had my wonderful beta panting. *winks*

Thanks to Zhivago3 as always and ARenee363 for beta'ing and making sure this all makes sense. A special shout out to my Sookieverse & WC girls, because well… they made me do it!

Disclaimer: Not SM… obviously

Chapter 12 – Hallelujah Here She Comes

BPOV

Classes had just ended for the summer. I had contemplated heading back to Washington for Alice's wedding – but had decided against it. She and Jasper were finally getting married after all of these years. They had been engaged for as long as I could remember and had actually begun planning their wedding around the same time as ours. With the disaster that mine turned out to be, they decided to wait.

Alice would never admit that they postponed their nuptials because of what I went through, but I knew it was one of the main reasons. I knew they pitied me and didn't want to subject me to someone else's marital bliss. They didn't realize it, but it only made me more depressed. Someone else shouldn't have had to postpone their happiness for my sake. If anything, it would have been the one shining light in a lot of darkness for me. I also think Alice wanted to be cautious and one hundred percent sure that Jasper really wanted to get married and didn't have any skeletons in his closet. Whether anything was revealed is unknown, but they were happy and moving forward.

I knew Alice was disappointed that I wouldn't make the effort for her, but I was embarrassed to be around the rest of the family. Sure, it had been almost two years, but I was positive the rumors were still lingering. After careful convincing, Alice understood.

Rosalie was just as eager for me to visit and was even more upset with me that I wasn't going back home. She and Emmett had a beautiful baby girl, Emma Rose, born in April. They made me godmother against my protestations and were looking forward to me meeting their new daughter. I had seen the pictures, but according to Rose, they didn't do her daughter any justice. I would love to have seen the happy family, but I knew it would only make me think of everything I was missing out on without Edward. I felt bad that I couldn't be there for Rose and the baby and I wanted to see Emma, but I just didn't think I could do that to myself.

Then of course, there was Edward.

I hadn't heard from him, nor had Alice or Rosalie mentioned him in conversation since New Year's. Admittedly, I was interested in what was going on in his life, though I would never tell my friends. I had a morbid curiosity to know if he had moved on or if he was still hurting. I think I just wanted to validate my own feelings. Regardless, they didn't need any more reasons to try and get us back together. It wasn't going to happen. He hurt me beyond relief and…

There was Zafrina to think about now. She was smart, beautiful, gentle, and patient and she understood me. She had been the jilted woman once and she was there for me when I questioned myself and my decisions in regards to Edward. Zafrina was the breath of life that I never knew I needed.

As for our sex life – well that was a bit interesting. We had not gone too far, but she had taught me a few tricks with toys. I was finding areas on my body that I never knew were erotic. That sparkly vibrator I purchased on Valentine's Day came in handy – often. It was a matter of time before I would be ready to take the next step with her, but we were taking it slow and I knew it would happen. Until then, I enjoyed just looking at her and her body.

It was a wonderful day in the City of Brotherly Love, so I made my way down to Penn's Landing to enjoy the view and the calm of the water. I figured I'd walk down to the pier and enjoy the sights of Philadelphia again - the Liberty Bell, Independence Hall, all the great history that was here. I knew Jasper would appreciate it. He was always the history buff. I pulled out my phone as thinking of him made me nostalgic for my friends.

"Bella, I was just about to call you!" Alice squealed into the phone after several rings. "I found a way for you to be in the wedding without you actually being here."

"Uh, hello to you, too, Alice and what is that crazy mind of yours thinking now?" I stopped to buy an ice cream sandwich from a vendor.

"Web cam!" she exclaimed.

"Thanks," I said to the vendor as he returned my change. "Web cam, Alice? How exactly is that going to work?"

"Easy, you set up the webcam on your computer and we'll have a camera set up here so you can see everything," she explained. "Oh, and you'll have to get dressed up too."

I groaned. "Why would I have to get dressed up? I'll be on a computer screen, not to mention that you'll only see my face. Don't be ridiculous, Ali."

"It's my wedding, Bella. You would be dressed up in maid of honor gear if you were coming, but since you're not you have to do this for me. I can't get married without you here and this is the next best thing. Please do this for me?" she pleaded.

I rolled my eyes, grateful that we were talking over the phone. She was right though. If I wasn't scared, I would be there in full maid of honor regalia supporting her. How could I say no to her?

"Fine, I'll do it, but you're buying me the web cam," I relented.

I swore I could hear her bouncing in her seat. "Don't worry, Bella, I'll have everything set up for you, including your hair and make-up appointment." Yes, of course she would.

I took a bite of the ice cream and immediately had brain freeze. "Oh fuck, damn it!" I yelled, rubbing the side of my head with my palm.

"Bella, are you okay?" Alice asked with concern.

"Yeah, just a little brain freeze. Give me a sec." After a few moments the pain subsided and I continued talking. "Sorry…"

"Where are you anyway?"

"I'm walking down to Penn's Landing right now. It's a gorgeous day and I wanted to take advantage of it."

"Oh, that's nice. Are you meeting Zafrina there? Oh and speaking of which, since I was hoping you would have brought her to the wedding, I want her there with you during the webcam session. I want to meet her finally. Seeing pictures can only do so much for me and I know you're happy and all, but really, I need to meet her."

"Oh, umm…" I didn't have an answer for her. It never crossed my mind to bring Zafrina with me to Alice's wedding for the brief moment I even entertained going. I wasn't sure if she would want to meet everyone and I wasn't sure if I was ready to introduce her as my girlfriend. Then again, I still hadn't come to terms with the whole sexuality thing either. When it came down to it, I was a confused mess.

"You were planning on bringing her, right?" she asked unsure of the answer.

"I, uh, hadn't thought about it actually. I thought it would be too awkward for her," I replied, knowing I was lying.

"Are you serious? You two have been together nearly six months! You know we wouldn't judge either of you, we love you. Besides, from what I understand, she's been a lesbian all of her life, so I'm sure she's had to deal with all sorts of fucked up families. Honestly, I think you're the one who's afraid to bring her around. And I get it, I really do, but you're a grown woman and really, with all the luck you've had with men, it only seems logical you'd end up with a woman," Alice mused.

I supposed she was right. I did seem to have bad luck in the man department. First there was Edward, and then there was Jacob, and most recently, Tyler. Jacob…

September 2001

Edward had told me that he had everything planned out for my birthday. I knew we were going to dinner and I needed to dress nicely, but he didn't give me a clue as to where we were going. I tried to get a hint out of Alice, but for once, she was keeping mum. I could only imagine what would happen.

He had the day off, which was a pleasant surprise. Edward was always trying to get a leg up on the competition so I assumed he would have worked a shift, even a couple of hours, but he woke me up and told me he had every intention of spending the day with me and only me. I was elated.

Edward told me he had to run to the store to pick up something for later in the evening. He wasn't going to be long, so I waited in bed for him and figured I could use a few more minutes of sleep. I had a feeling I would need all the rest I could get.

Then the phone rang.

I reached over to the nightstand to pick it up. "Hello?" I rasped.

"Oh Bella, I hope I didn't wake you. It's Dr. Volturi, is Edward there? I've been trying to reach him on his cell phone and I can't seem to get through to him."

"Uh, no, he's not here. He just stepped out for a moment, he'll be back soon. What's happening? Is there some sort of emergency?" I asked.

"Yes, as a matter of fact there is. I need to speak to him right away. Please tell him to call the hospital as soon as you see him or hear from him," he replied quickly. I could hear the commotion in the background. That wasn't a good sign. I had a bad feeling whatever plans Edward had would be postponed.

"Sure-" Before I could finish, Dr. Volturi hung up. I shook my head at the phone and proceeded to dial Edward.

"What?" he answered clearly agitated.

"Edward? It's Bella." I replied cautiously.

"Oh, hey baby. I'm sorry. The hospital's been calling and they are getting to me. What's going on?"

"Ah, well, that's what I was calling about. Dr. Volturi called looking for you. He says it's an emergency and to call him immediately."

"Fuck!" he yelled. I was startled at the outburst considering he normally stopped whatever he was doing when the hospital called for him.

"Edward is… is everything alright?" I inquired, not wanting to irritate him further.

"Yes," I answered to both of them. "Baby, let me call you back. It's apparently important that I call them." I nodded before realizing he couldn't see me.

"Okay. Let me know what's happening."

"Sure." He hung up quickly before I could say anything more.

A short while later he called to tell me he had been summoned to the hospital and would try his hardest to get back to me before my birthday ended. I knew he was upset, probably more so than I was. I think he looked forward to my birthday more than I did, especially since I hated celebrating any day that put more attention on me than I wanted. Not to mention it was common now to not have him around, it would just feel like any other day.

I fell back asleep, deciding that I would just relax and read for the rest of the day. I wasn't sure how long I was asleep before I heard the incessant knocking on the front door. Throwing back the covers, I rose from my bed and walked to the door, checking the time on the cable box. Two o'clock. I had been asleep for nearly three hours. I guess I needed it.

My first thought of who was at the door was Alice. She must have found out from Edward that he was working and she came to spend my birthday with me. I was not, however, expecting the person at door as I opened it.

"Jacob?"

"Live and direct, baby!" he said lifting me into a bear hug. "Happy birthday, beautiful," he whispered into my ear, hugging me tighter.

"I…can't…breathe…" I stammered out. Jacob quickly put me down apologizing. "It's okay," I said catching my breath. "What are you doing here, though?"

"I came to see my favorite girl for her birthday, of course! But, if she doesn't let me in soon, I might just have to turn around." I realized then that he was still standing in the hallway. I stepped aside and allowed him entrance. That was when I saw the bags that he had.

"Wait, did you come to visit or move in?" I asked pointing to the bags.

"Oh yeah, that. I'm moving to Seattle," he began to explain, setting the bags down. Seeing the shock on my face he continued, "Don't worry, I'm not staying with you, I have a hotel set up, but I wanted to see you first. Plus, I arrived early and check in doesn't start for another two hours."

"But…I don't…why the move? What about your father?" Jacob's father, Billy, had been in an accident that caused him to be paralyzed from the waist down. Billy was capable of movement with a wheelchair, but Jacob and his sisters were the ones that took care of their father. It had been a while since I kept up with his family but from what I remembered, Jacob's two sisters had married and moved out of state, leaving Jacob to fend for himself and Billy.

"Rachel divorced Sam," he stated. I fell back onto the couch, amazed at what Jacob said. Rachel and Sam were so in love; you just knew they would be together forever.

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that, is she okay?"

"She's hanging in there. Sam cheated on her and actually got another woman pregnant. I was ready to get on the next plane out to her and beat the shit out of Sam, but Rachel stopped me. She said it wasn't worth the headache and, I guess, she was right. From what I hear he's struggling with the new woman and kid," he shrugged. "Anyway, Rachel came back home and will be taking care of dad."

"Wow," I whispered. "But, what about you? That still doesn't explain why you're here, why you're moving to Seattle."

"Right, that. Well, you know I was always good with cars and fixing them up?" I nodded. "Well, I fixed up this beautiful Maserati that got stalled in our little town. What the hell someone with that kind of car was doing in Forks, I don't know, but he loved what I did and how fast I was able to diagnose and fix the problem. He took my number and I hadn't heard for him a while, then about two months ago he calls telling me that he wanted to hire a private mechanic for his suite of cars. Apparently the guy is an avid car collector. I agreed on the condition that I could have other clients as well. So he did one better and told me he'll help me start my own business. He's fronting all of the money, I work on his cars for free and he'll even bring in clients so I can make money from the beginning. "

"Jacob, that's…wow…what an opportunity!" I leaned over and hugged him. "I'm really proud of you. I know you'll do well too. So when does all of this start?" I asked settling back next to him.

"Next week actually. This has all been in the works for a while. I admit I wasn't sure what I was going to do with dad at first. I couldn't bring him yet until I was able to get a place big enough for both of us and I wasn't sure how long that would be. Rachel leaving Sam was a blessing in disguise."

"Can you really trust this guy, though? Who is he? What does he do?" It was a perfect opportunity for Jacob, but I was still worried that he was getting in over his head.

"Oh yeah, I checked him out. I did lots of research on the guy. His name is Eleazar Denali. He owns Denali Industries. He made his fortune in oil up in Alaska before coming down to Seattle. He expanded into venture capitalism, that's why he's funding me now," Jacob answered. He obviously did his homework. The Denali name sounded familiar, but I couldn't place it. It would eventually come to me.

"Well, then, sounds like you're all set."

"Yeah, pretty much, but enough about me, I came to see the birthday girl. Where's lover boy?" He sneered. "I thought he would have at least taken the day off to spend it with you."

I rolled my eyes. Jacob and Edward always had this dislike for each other which began when I moved back to Forks. I grew up with Jacob even though he was a couple of years younger. My parents were close to Billy and I ended up spending a lot of time playing with Jacob. He was devastated when we moved away, elated when we moved back. He always had a small crush on me, but I just chalked it up to familiarity. He hated that I was so easily taken with Edward, but my heart was where it belonged.

"Edward actually did take the day off, but he was called into the hospital for an emergency. There was a huge accident, lots of people injured and they needed all the doctors to come in," I shrugged. "It's no big deal really. I'm used to the long hours now."

Jacob shook his head. "This is just no good. Come on, let's order pizza or something. At least get a cake, you need to blow out candles on your birthday."

The next thing I knew Jacob and I were stuffed with pizza and ice cream cake, his gift to me. We spent the day reminiscing about our time in Forks and talking about what we had planned for ourselves in the near future. He asked if Edward was ever going to pop the question.

"If he doesn't do it, you know I'm more than willing to marry you," he smirked. I responded by throwing a pepperoni at him.

It was hours later before I noticed the time. The sun had gone down and we were heading close to midnight.

"Shit, Jacob, you've been here all day, you were supposed to check in hours ago!" I exclaimed when seeing the time.

"Oh fuck!" He quickly called the hotel and was informed that the room was given up for the night, but there was availability for the next day. "Bella, I hate to do this to you, but will it be all right if I stay the night?"

"Uh, yeah, of course, you can stay here on the couch. It'll be a bit small for you, but it's something. You know I wouldn't leave you hanging," I offered.

"You're the best, Bells! I'm going to change, if that's okay with you," he said as he opened up one of his bags and pulled out a pair of gym shorts, boxers and t-shirt.

"That's fine. Here let me get you a towel so you can freshen up or shower if you want." I walked over to the linen closer and grabbed a towel and washcloth for Jacob and handed them to him.

As he washed up, I checked my cell phone. There were missed calls from my parents and Alice, but no calls or texts from Edward which I found rather odd. If there was one thing about Edward that I loved, he always made the time to at least send me a quick message whenever he had the chance. I hardly called him when he was working because I just never knew when he was free.

Due to the late hour, I sent text messages to everyone thanking them for their birthday wishes. Another year older and I was without the one person who really mattered to me. I just hoped he wasn't banging his head over it. He tended to always feel guilty when he wronged me in any way, no matter how small.

When Jacob came out, I followed after and freshened up as well. Once dressed in my pajamas, I joined Jacob in the living room.

"What do you want to do now, birthday girl?" he asked.

"Ummm…movie?" I timidly suggested.

"Sounds like a plan." He waltzed over to our movie collection. Edward, for whatever reason, had tons of movies though he never had the chance to watch them. It was as bad as his music collection. He selected a movie and hid it from view as he inserted it into the player.

"What movie are you putting in?" I asked curious as to why he was hiding it.

"It's a surprise." He grabbed the remotes for the television and player and sat back down on the couch. He pulled me towards him and wrapped his arm around me. "Lover boy won't be upset that I have you in my arms, will he?"

I giggled. "You're so stupid, Jake. You're my oldest friend; I don't think he would mind that much." I leaned further into him and laid my head on his chest. He was comfortable and warm, but still not Edward. "You can start the movie now, ya know."

"Oh yeah." He pressed play and the opening credits of one of my favorites movies came on.

"Sixteen Candles, huh?"

"It seemed appropriate," he snorted. I smacked his chest and settled back in to watch the movie. I was asleep within minutes.

~*~

I was having one of those falling dreams again when I woke up falling off the couch. I was confused as to why I was on the couch in the first place until I turned to see Jacob laying there snoring. The previous night, and day, came back to me. Edward had to work on my birthday; Jacob came to surprise me and ended up staying over. We fell asleep on the couch watching Sixteen Candles. Got it.

Wait, shit I fell asleep next to Jacob. Sure, we used to sleep in the same bed when we were children, but he was a grown man now – with a crush on me. I should have known better and Edward could have come home at any time and seen us. Edward wasn't normally the jealous type, but Jacob was different.

I stared at him figuring out the best way to wake him up and saw, not for the first time how handsome he had become. The morning sun was shining through the window illuminating Jacob's good looks.

Jacob had always been awkward in his body growing up. When we moved back to Forks, I almost didn't recognize him. He filled in nicely. He had grown to about six foot five and his long hair was cut short. His features were soft, but still strong. His body…well, had I not met Edward, things could have been different between me and Jake.

But, Jake was no Edward.

I cleared my head of thoughts of Jacob and continued with my task at hand. It was going to be a difficult one. Jacob was completely oblivious to the fact I had fallen, but then again a plane could land on his rooftop and he still wouldn't wake up. I perched myself on the edge of the couch and gently shook Jake awake. He didn't budge. I shook him a little harder and still nothing. I thought back to when we were children and how Billy would wake up Jacob. I wasn't sure if I could be so cruel, but it seemed to be the only way.

I went into the kitchen and retrieved a frying pan and a pot. If that didn't work, I wasn't sure what would. I headed back into the living room and positioned myself near Jacob's head. On the count of three, I began clanging the pot and pan together.

Yep, that worked.

Jacob's whole body rose a foot off the couch as he was startled awake by the loud noise.

"What the fuck, Bella!?!? Are you trying to give me a heart attack?" he screamed.

I shrugged. "Well I was trying to wake you up for about five minutes and you weren't moving. I had to resort to your father's old tricks," I smirked.

"If you weren't my oldest and dearest friend I would've clocked you just now. You're lucky," he said glaring at me. I rolled my eyes.

"I'm so scared. Anyway, get up and get dressed. I don't know when or if Edward is coming home today, but just in case, I don't want him thinking anything happened," I stated.

"What? Does lover boy get jealous?" he asked sarcastically.

"No," I snarled, "but I don't need him to start and will you stop calling him lover boy? Just go and get dressed," I ordered.

Jacob snorted, but followed my command and went to change.

We ate breakfast and sat around talking some more. Jake was hesitant in leaving me alone. Edward still hadn't called to tell me when he would be home and Jake, insisting that it was still my birthday weekend refused to leave. I wondered more and more if he even had a reservation at the hotel.

It was an hour later when I heard the keys in the door and Edward came home. In a way, I was slightly relieved. Jacob was starting to become a bit overbearing and I wanted my comfort in Edward.

"Hey Bella!" he called out.

"Edward!" I stood from the couch and gave him a hug and a kiss. "Guess who showed up yesterday! It was a surprise for my birthday."

"Jacob," Edward stated flatly. I knew this was going to be a long day already.

"Edward," replied Jake.

This was going to get ugly fast. I only hoped the two would stay cordial for my sake.

"What time did you get here?" Edward sneered.

"Got in yesterday afternoon," Jacob replied. "Imagine my surprise to find Bella here all alone on her birthday. I thought you would have taken her somewhere special." I held in my breath for Edward's response. Jacob bringing up that Edward wasn't around would certainly hit a sore spot.

"I actually did have big plans for her yesterday, unfortunately the hospital called and I didn't have a choice. They needed me. But, now I see why I never got a phone call, she was too busy entertaining," he spat out. I saw red immediately. I never called him at the hospital and he was well aware of why, but to even suggest that I would be "entertaining" Jacob in any way other than as a friend was wrong. My stomached knotted up in anger.

Before I could say anything, Jacob jumped out of his seat, fists clenched at his side. I was instantly between the two of them.

I turned to Jacob and yelled, "You calm down, this instant! And you," I glared at Edward, "have no right to say anything. That was mean and totally uncalled for. How dare you even insinuate something like that? Jacob is my friend and always will be just…a…friend." I saw the disappointment in Jacob's eyes.

"Bella, you're my-"

I cut Edward off. "Oh quit the pissing contest, both of you," I let out in frustration. "This is supposed to be my birthday weekend and you are just ruining it. First you, Edward, having to save lives and now the two of you trying to stake a claim on me have just made this the worst weekend ever. There's too much testosterone in this room." I stormed off the room and slammed the door shut, clicking the lock in place.

I paced the bedroom hearing the muffled voices of Edward and Jacob as they argued. I seriously couldn't believe both of them. I mean really, did Edward not trust me at all that he would think I could do anything with Jacob? The only person who had any right to be jealous in our relationship was me. I saw the way the other female doctors and nurses would look at Edward. If I didn't know how much Edward loved me I would have easily thought he was cheating on me, but those thoughts never crossed my mind. I was hurt for sure.

Their voices grew louder; more specifically Edward's voice grew louder as I was sure Jacob was egging him on. I caught the last of Edward's words.

"I need to provide for my wife!" I gasped. Wife? Was he planning on marrying me? We had spoken about it in passing, but I knew he wanted to wait. My mind ran through his recent behavior, his uncharacteristic nervousness, his irritability of having to work yesterday. Had he planned on proposing to me?

I unlocked the door and slowly opened it, causing it to squeak.

"Edward?" I walked cautiously into the living room

"Bella, I'm sorry…" he shook his head and sat down, hold his head in his hands. "I screwed up and I'm sorry. I certainly didn't mean to take it out on you. I was tired from the long shifts-"

"No, it's okay, but the other…" He thought I was still upset, and I was, but I wanted to know more about the wife comment. Did he really mean it?

"Bella, I want…I love you, with all of my heart. I want to spend the rest of my life with you if you will have me. I have a ring for you and I was at the store yesterday picking it up when they called. I didn't want to lose it or get it stolen so I left there, but I will go right now to get it if you say yes." I was overwhelmed with emotion. I was angry, but ecstatic. I was torn between slapping him and hugging him to death. I didn't know what to say. "Please?" he asked.

"Edward," I lifted my hand and began to play with the hair on the nape of his neck, just as he always liked. "I…love you too, and I really want to say yes, but…Jacob, can you give us a minute?" Wordlessly, Jacob stood and went to the kitchen.

The next half hour we spoke about his insinuations and my concerns. He said he trusted me implicitly, but I had to remind him that but even accusing Jacob of doing anything to me, he was also not trusting me or my judgment. I also likened the situation to the women at the hospital. He understood how I felt.

Finally, after we both had our say I said the magic word.

"Yes?" he asked his brows furrowed in confusion.

"I'll marry you, silly. I love you and I want to grow old with you."

I called Jacob back into the living room and shared with him the good news. He looked less than thrilled, but congratulated us nonetheless. He was soon in a hurry to get to his hotel. I wanted to talk to him about the engagement, but I decided to save it for another day. I wanted to spend the rest of the day celebrating with Edward.

Jacob left and Edward and I drove to the jewelry store to pick up the ring. I insisted on going with him, I didn't want to be apart anymore, unless absolutely necessary. When we arrived at the store, the associate greeted us and immediately went to the back knowing we were there for the ring. He handed the black velvet box to Edward and disappeared.

I turned to Edward only to see him getting down on one knee.

"I wanted to do this properly last night, so I hope you're not disappointed in the less than romantic way I'm proposing," he began. He was so cute, even when he was nervous. He ran his hand through his hair, took a deep breath and looked up at me with his piercing emerald eyes. Even though I knew what was coming, I couldn't help but be taken aback by his gaze.

"Ed-"

"Bella, I've known you for seven years, but it feels like I've known you for a lifetime. You know me better than anyone. You are my light, my soul, my best friend. I love you more than words can even say." He removed the ring from the box. My already fast beating heart was ready to explode. The ring was gorgeous, even in its simplicity. It was a solitary diamond set in smooth platinum. "I had it engraved," he continued. "It says 'Two Hearts Beat As One.' My heart can't beat without yours, Bella, and I know together we will last a lifetime. Will you be my heart, my soul, my wife?"

I couldn't stop the tears that came streaming down my face. I pulled him up and kissed him fiercely, conveying all my love in that one kiss. I wanted him forever.

"Yes! Yes, Edward, god I love you!" I was giggling now like a school girl, but Edward soon stopped the giggles with another passionate kiss, a kiss that made me shudder with want. It was no wonder the associate left the room. "Edward," I moaned.

"Let's go home, I want to make love to my future wife."

That we did. I couldn't have been happier at that moment.

July 2006

I was on the phone with Alice again as she told me the date and time of my hair and makeup appointments. I still couldn't believe that I had allowed Alice to talk me into "appearing" at the wedding via webcam and to do so all dolled up. I would pay her back for this eventually.

Her wedding was in a week and I was truly excited for her, even if slightly jealous, but I would never tell her. She was getting the happy ending that I should have had. I tried not to dwell on it too much, but it would still creep into my mind.

There was a knock on the door, no doubt Zafrina. I gave her the spare key to my apartment, but she still insisted on knocking. She told me she would only use it for emergencies. I didn't foresee any emergencies, but I let it be.

I let her in, giving her a chaste kiss on the lips.

"Alice, I have to go. Zafrina's here. Thanks for the information," I said quickly rushing her off the phone.

"Wait! Tell Zafrina I said hello and I look forward to seeing her at the wedding. I really wish you guys would come. It's not going to be the same without you here," she whined.

"Uh, huh. Yeah, I know what you mean. I'll speak to you soon."

"Bella!" Alice shouted before I could hang up. "What's going on?"

"Nothing, Alice. I don't know what you're talking about," I said feigning ignorance.

"Oh, you know what? Can you put her on the phone? I have to ask her if she's allergic to anything so I can let the specialist at the spa know."

"That won't be necessary. I forgot to tell you, she won't be coming. She has plans." I looked at Zafrina who was staring back at me with confusion.

"I can't come to what?" Zafrina mouthed. I shook her head letting her know I would tell her later.

"Plans? But you've known about the wedding for a while now, I can't imagine that she would have made plans knowing how important the day was for you and for me," Alice admonished.

"I…uh…" I stammered.

"Oh my god. You never told her, did you? Bella…" she let out a long breath. "You know what? This is your problem; I can't deal with this right now. You figure this out on your own. I will say that you need to be honest with yourself and with her. You should have told her. I won't cancel her appointment, but let me know the outcome…if she's still with you." With that, she hung up.

Zafrina was sitting on the leather seat looking at me with a quirked eyebrow. "What was that all about?"

"Uh, nothing. Alice just had to give me some information for something," I lied. I didn't understand why I couldn't tell her the truth. I wanted her to be with me at the wedding or at least present, but I couldn't get the nerve to ask her.

"What is it, Bella? You're hiding something and I thought we established before that we would always be honest with each other," she stated. We did. I did. I promised I would be honest and forthcoming and at the first sign of any stress, I lied to her.

"Alice is getting married next week," I muttered.

Zafrina squealed in delight. "That's great news! So what's the problem? When do you leave? When do we leave?" I didn't say anything, but I couldn't look her in the eyes. I knew the shame was evident on my face. "Wait, next week. You didn't tell me and you weren't planning on telling me either. Was I even invited?" I nodded. "So then, you were going and leaving me behind without telling me?"

I opened and closed my mouth several times. What the fuck did you say to that? "I'm not going to the wedding," I said flatly. Well that was certainly the truth.

"What do you mean you're not going? That's your best friend; of course you have to go. What's going on with you, Bella?" she asked, her voice pitching in worry.

I sat down on the couch across from her. "I don't know. I don't think I can face them yet. Alice is getting married and I know Edward will be there as well, he's her brother. I just… it would be too hard for me," I admitted. I was embarrassed at my admission; this was the first time I ever really spoke to anyone about what I was feeling.

"Bella, it's almost two years now. You can't honestly tell me that you still haven't gotten over what happened. I'm sure Edward has moved on, why can't you?"

"Of course I'm moving on! That's I'm with you and why I even agreed to the stupid idea of the webcam," I snapped. "I believe that's beyond the definition of moving on, don't you think?

Zafrina gasped, then her voice was laced with ire as she spoke. "So what the fuck am I? Just a distraction for you? A shiny toy to play with until you can get over whatever fucking hang-ups you have? Is that why you never told me about the wedding? Why bring along some nobody, right? My god, you can't even have me with you over a fucking webcam?" She stood up to leave, but I grabbed her.

"No, Zafrina, that's not what I meant," I argued. "I'm with you because I want to be with you and I would like to think that you are helping me move on. I love being with you."

"Then why didn't you say anything about Alice's wedding? Are you ashamed of me? Don't want to admit to your family and friends that you're a lesbian now?" she taunted.

"I…" I didn't know what to say. I was backed into a corner and I didn't know what to do. I was honest when I said I loved being with her, but what would the family think of my new sexual preference? What would Edward think? Then again, why did I care what Edward thought, right?

"Just what I thought," she shook. I saw the hurt in her eyes. "You can't even give me an answer, Bella. You're still hung up over Edward, even after what he did to you. You, for whatever reason, are embarrassed about things that happened years ago, that I'm sure everyone has forgotten about and if they haven't, then fuck them. You don't need them. More importantly, you are embarrassed about the person that you've become. A wonderful, caring, open-minded person. My suggestion to you?" She looked at me for a moment. "See a therapist. You need it. You need to get these issues you have out in the open and stop harboring them. It's not healthy."

She opened the door then and walked out. I didn't stop her.

The rest of the day, I sat moping. Alice was angry with me and didn't accept my phone calls. I didn't bother calling Zafrina. I knew she wouldn't want to talk to me, at least not yet.

I thought over what Zafrina said. She was right. I was embarrassed over what happened with Edward at our wedding. It was supposed to be the best day of my life and it was ruined by his infidelity. I was letting Edward still direct my life and decisions even though we were no longer together. It wasn't my fault he cheated and lied to me. At least, I thought so. I just didn't understand what I did that would make him seek solace in someone else's arms. I thought I was a good girlfriend, but obviously I wasn't, and now I was proving the point with my actions toward Zafrina.

She didn't deserve this. She was the best thing that had happened to me since the wedding and I couldn't let her go. I loved her, she was a beautiful person. I couldn't say for sure if I was in love with her, but I knew I felt a closeness with her that I hadn't felt in a long time. I didn't want to let her go.

I looked at the time on the clock and saw it was still early. I grabbed my purse and jacket and went to the one place I needed to be.

~*~

She finally opened the door and we stared at each other for an innumerable amount of time. Before I could think, I crossed the threshold, took her head in my hands and kissed her hard. She didn't respond at first, no doubt still upset with me. I persisted though. Licking her bottom lip, asking for entrance, she seemed to relax and began to kiss me back. I was relieved when she responded. We could make this work.

We moved further into the room as she slammed the door shut, never once breaking contact with my mouth. It wasn't until we both had to breathe that I spoke.

"I'm sorry Zafrina. I am so, so sorry. You are right; I don't know what I'm thinking anymore. I am so confused. Please forgive me," I pleaded looking into her dark eyes.

"Bella," she sighed. She pulled me towards the couch and sat me down next to her. "I understand that you are confused. You went through a lot with the wedding. That was embarrassing in itself and I also understand how it would look for you show up with me on your arm. You've only been with men, a man, for most of your life. This is a whole new experience for you, something I know will take time for you to handle, but I am glad you are sharing it with me. I do forgive you…on the condition that you follow my advice and go to therapy. You have too many unresolved issues, particularly with Edward. You need to figure those out."

I nodded in agreement. "I know, I am going to call tomorrow. You're right, I need therapy, I need to be able to talk to someone about these issues and figure what to do with my life now. I will work through my issues. All of them. I promise."

Zafrina leaned in and placed a chaste kiss on my lips. Before she could move away, I grabbed her again, kissing her deeply.

"Bella…"

"Please Zafrina," I whispered. "I need this. I want this." I did, I was ready to give myself to her. I didn't know why I held back before and I knew the therapy sessions would help me, but I was with her and I knew what I wanted.

"Come on," she stood up and took my hand, leading me into her bedroom.

We stood in front of her bed as she slowly took my jacket off. She stepped closer to me and placed feather kisses across my face, my eyes, my cheeks. The softness of her lips was sending shivers down my body.

"You are so beautiful," she said kissing the corner of my mouth. "Are you sure about this?" She looked directly into my eyes and I could see the lust behind her eyes mirroring my own. I was extremely nervous; we were taking the next step and I didn't know what to do, but I was sure about moving on. I wanted her in every way.

"Without a doubt," I answered. It was all she needed as she slanted her mouth over mine and kissed me with a fervor that was never there before. She had been holding back, too. Her tongue darted out licking my bottom lip wanting entrance into my mouth which I quickly gave her. I moaned at her taste. She was so delicious.

Her hands found the hem of my shirt and she lifted it up until it was completely off. Her hands glided over my now exposed skin, causing more shivers to course through my body.

Zafrina began to lick down my neck, nibbling along the way. I could feel my nipples pebbling. "You taste good, Bella. Does the rest of you taste as good?"

"You'll just have to find out," I breathed out.

"Mmmm, I intend to." She palmed one of my breasts, squeezing gently before taking a hard nipple in between her fingers. She rolled it, flicking it through the fabric of my bra.

"Fuck… more… please."

"Gladly." She pulled the fabric down, exposing my nipple to the cool air, making it even harder than it already was. "So pretty," she said before taking a slow lick around the nipple, but never touching it. It was sweet torture.

I arched my backing, silently begging for more. She continued to caress around the hard nub with her tongue until finally she took it in her mouth. I whimpered.

With her other hand, she freed my other breast, lonely as it was and began playing with it. She mimicked her earlier movements, teasing it into a hard pebble all the while never stopping with her mouth, that beautiful mouth that was sucking at my tip, gently biting down.

I was moaning in ecstasy, but I wanted more.

I lifted her head so we were eye-to-eye. "Can I take care of you?" I heard her breath hitch as gazed into her, showing her how much I wanted her.

She began to remove her shirt but I stopped her.

"Let me do that, please?" I urged. She nodded.

Zafrina had on a button-down blouse. I was of the mind to just rip it open, but I wanted my first to go slow. I began to unbutton her shirt, making sure my knuckles grazed her nipples. She tortured me; I would do the same to her.

At the last button, I leaned forward and licked her bottom lip. I opened her shirt and saw that she wasn't wearing a bra, the advantages of having perky breasts like her. I kissed along her collarbone, slowly gliding her shirt of her shoulders and to the floor.

Zafrina's hands went to my waist, drawing me closer. "You're driving me crazy, already, Bella," she moaned into my ear. I noticed that as her voice grew huskier need, her Brazilian accent was more pronounced, only serving to turn me on more.

"Teach me, Zafrina, show me how to please you," I whispered softly. Up until that moment, Zafrina had always instigated any of our sexual forays, which never amounted to more than fingering. I wanted to show her that I was in this with her and that included sex.

She pulled back and took her pants off quickly. I giggled realizing she was just as anxious as I was. She undid my jeans next and slid them down. I kicked my sandals off as she continued to pull my pants off.

Once all of our clothing was gone, we stared at one another, admiring each other's bodies. Zafrina's long wavy locks were over one shoulder, just barely covering a breast; the nipple peeking through the tendrils. Her luscious skin and curves were calling me. The triangle of hair between her legs made me lick my lips. I'd only felt this way for Edward. It was refreshing to have these same sexual feelings for Zafrina.

Zafrina sat me down on the edge of the bed, kneeling before me. "You're positive about this, Bella? I don't want to you to do this to make me happy. I want you to do this for you."

I nodded. "I'm positive. Make love to me please, show me…" She cut me off with another kiss as her hands pushed my legs apart. She trailed her tongue down to my breasts, taking each one into her mouth, keeping my nipples hard for her. She squeezed them together, allowing her to take both nipples at the same time. The sensations went down to my clit, which was throbbing with need.

I squirmed on the bed, wanting more. "Patience, Bella," she chided. She grazed her hands slowly down my sides to my legs sending shivers up my spine. Her caresses were soft, but urgent as she made her way to my waiting pussy. She dipped her head, taking a deep breath. "You smell so good, I bet you taste wonderful." She darted out her tongue to emphasis her point and I nearly shot off the bed.

"Oh my god!" I screamed as she licked around my clit.

"I was right, delicious." She gently pushed my upper body down and lifted one of my legs over her shoulder. This new position brought my wetness even closer to her as she dove in and feasted.

I didn't know what she was doing, but it felt like there were a hundred tongues lapping at my lips and clit. She swirled her tongue around my nub drawing it into her mouth and sucking on it gently. Her hair fell forward, tickling my inner thighs only adding to the sensations I was feeling. My body was on fire from her attention.

She moved a hand up to massage my breast, squeezing it as she did before. I felt a finger slowly enter me at the same time she pinched my nipple. I bucked into her hand and my back arched, lifting me and pressing me into her more.

"My god, Bella, you are so responsive," she said smugly. "You are so wet for me baby." She inserted another finger and began fucking me thoroughly. I knew I was close, the coil in my stomach tightening, waiting to be sprung.

"Oh god, Zafrina. It's so… fuck…" I whimpered. "So close…"

All at once, she curled her fingers, hitting the mysterious g-spot while gently biting on my clit and pinching my nibble. I unraveled instantly, coming hard on Zafrina's hand and mouth. The feeling was so intense I was backing away, but she held firmly, drinking up all the juices I offered her. She continued her ministrations until I was on the verge of another orgasm.

I screamed out her name, not able to hold back any longer.

"That's better," she smirked as she set my leg back down and climbed up the bed next to me. "I've been waiting for that for a long time, baby. That is how it's done. Thank you for letting me take care of you." She wrapped her arms around snuggling me close.

"Zafrina," I said huskily, "we're not done yet."

AN: So yes, the deed is done… but far from over. There is a picture of the engagement ring in the profile. Leave me some love. *kisses*