ASHLEY'S P.O.V
"Spencer?"
When I heard someone knock on my door, I really didn't expect it to be Spencer.
Not at this hour, not in this state.
"H-Hi"
I'm a little caught of guard when she presses her hand against my chest and pushes me back into the room.
"Is everything okay?"
I'm half asleep, but it's pretty obvious something's not right.
"I've c-changed my mm-ind"
I've never seen her this wasted before.
"Ash-ley I can't stop thinking 'bout y-you"
I can smell the alcohol on her.
"I just don't care any-mmmore"
"Spence?"
"W-Why does it matter what everyone else thinks?"
She keeps stumbling.
"Spence?"
She doesn't look so great.
"I'm going to be s-sick"
I quickly follow her into the bathroom and move so I'm kneeling next to her.
"It's okay"
It's clearly not okay.
Something's not right.
"I'm sorry"
"You have nothing to be sorry for Spencer"
I slowly rub my hand up and down her back as she leans over the bowl.
"Do you still feel sick?"
"I feel disgusting"
When she says that I quickly hop up and grab the mouth wash off the sink.
"Here"
I shouldn't laugh but she's drinking the mouth wash like it's water.
"Spence?"
I quickly reach out and grab it off her.
"Was that mouth wash?"
I thought she knew what it was.
"Sorry"
I reach out and flush the toilet as she moves so she's sitting on the floor.
"I'll grab you some water..."
"Ashley I'm sorry I came here"
"It's okay"
I reach out and pass her the water bottle I left on the sink.
"Here"
I slowly move so I'm sitting next to her on the floor.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
There's a really long pause before she says anything.
"He wrote to my family and told them all I was gay"
He's such a fucking asshole.
"And I have no idea what he's said or how he's said it"
When I wrap my arm around her, she moves her head so it's resting on my shoulder.
"I just don't know what to do anymore?"
"It's okay"
She's crying.
"Ash I never wanted to hurt him"
"I know"
I hate seeing her like this.
"Spence?"
I tilt her head so her eyes are locked on mine.
"You made a mistake..."
I reach across and wipe a stray tear off her cheek.
"And I made a mistake"
I'm just as responsible as she is.
"But people make mistakes Spencer and I know this is a lot to deal with right now, but it will get better... I promise"
Her face is only inches from mine.
"Why do you put up with me?"
When she says that I smile.
"Spence I'm not putting up with you..."
I'm so crazy about this girl.
"I really like having you around"
When she leans closer I feel like my heart's going to beat out of my chest.
"Ash I can't stop thinking that this is all worth it because I've found you"
The second her lips touch mine I know I need to pull back, but I wait.
I've missed her lips, I've missed being with her, I've missed it all.
"Spencer we should stop"
When I say that she pulls right back.
"I should go"
I stop her before she can move.
"I want this Spencer, but I want it when you're ready, not when you're like this"
I slowly hop up and help her to her feet.
"It's late..."
I reach out and tuck a strand of hair behind her ear.
"Do you want something more comfortable to sleep in?"
"I should probably go back to my room..."
"Don't be ridiculous Spencer I want you here"
I'm not going to let her leave when she's like this.
"Are you sure?"
"Spencer I'm positive"