Disclaimer: Unless someone knows something I don't, I'm pretty sure I don't own Naruto.
A/N: Don't expect updates this fast. It only happened because I wrote the first two chapters before I decided to post.
Pre Wave Mini arc
Changes
1. Bloodline
2. make Kyuubi not an evil dick (not actually shown, but will be implied next chapter)
888
A violation of trust deserves one in return
888
Naruto arrived at probably one of the most inopportune times he could have...hanging from some, admittedly now, thin ropes in front of the Yondaime's face with a paint brush in hand. He'd have liked to have gone back further, but at least this would still give him a chance to take another crack at that bastard Mizuki. He couldn't wait to see the look on that bastard's face when he passed his exam. With a grin on his face, Naruto tossed the paint can down into the crowd of people, then made the handseal for the Shunshin...before realizing that he wasn't supposed to know that jutsu yet. If that many people, and several of them were shinobi who'd recognize the technique, saw him use that technique, it could land him in trouble, as well as having him brought forth to answer questions he'd rather not. Grabbing onto the ropes, Naruto began climbing back up, just as he heard Iruka yell out.
'Shit, busted.'
888
Naruto sat on the floor of the Academy classroom, again tied up, and cursing the forced deja-vu. He petulantly listened to Iruka's rant about him failing the graduation exam twice already, never realizing that he was practically replaying the same scene almost to the letter, but for different reasons. It wasn't until Iruka yelled for everyone to line up for a Henge test, did Naruto really start to pay attention.
As Naruto waited in line for his turn, he was having a fierce internal debate.
'To Oiroke or not to Oiroke, that is the question.' Naruto thought sagely. 'Hmm, that sounded familiar, but I can't seem to place it for some reason.'
"It's Shakespeare, doofus." A voice in his head said. "And I think you should definitely Oiroke, only make it better. Oiroke into Iruka."
Iruka noticed the rather devious grin on Naruto's face, and while he didn't know why, he became incredibly fearful of the blond. Knowing there was nothing for it, he called the blond to the front, and awaited Naruto's performance. Placing his hands in the seal for transformation, Naruto called upon his chakra...which was far more than an E-rank Genjutsu/Ninjutsu hybrid required. Was it his fault that he'd missed the lecture that explained that Henge was a Genjutsu/Ninjutsu hybrid, and not a full on Ninjutsu? No, it was the fault of the boy who'd hit him in the face with a spitball, and when he reacted in shock, it was the bigoted teacher's fault for tossing him out for disruption without even trying to find out what really happened. Thankfully for everyone's sense of justice, both the culprit and the teacher found themselves spending a lot of time on the toilet the next day...without toilet paper.
Anyway, as I was saying before, Naruto called upon more chakra than he needed for the jutsu. You know, one would think that given everything, he'd have learned at some point to properly perform the jutsu, especially when Tsunade and Jiraiya found out that his Henge wasn't normal...and I'm rambling again. Sorry, back to the story.
With a cry of Henge, Naruto performed the jutsu. The figure that emerged from the smoke both shocked (in a good way) and horrified Iruka. There, standing in front of him, was himself...only as an extremely sexy woman. From the hairstyle, the height, the similar, but more slight build, even to his facial scar, everything was there, and added to it was an hourglass figure, a very pleasant bust of a very nice size, wide, round hips, and from what he could see, likely a very plump, firm behind as well. Poor Iruka would be traumatized when the fact that he'd gotten a rocket nosebleed from seeing himself as a naked woman finally registered later that evening.
Naruto had just turned back when Iruka hopped back to his feet, and one Big Head no Jutsu later, Naruto had been chastised for creating, as Iruka put it, 'Stupid Skills'. And yes, you could tell from his tone that the two words were indeed capitalized. Things after that continued the same as they had before, with Naruto grumbling at the fact that he couldn't use the Tajuu Kage Bunshin no Jutsu to help clean the mess. Again, that would bring about unwanted questions. While he planned to use the jutsu for his graduation exam, that could be played off as that being how he'd been taught to use the jutsu, which wasn't far from the truth.
888
The next day found Naruto sitting in the back of the room awaiting his turn to take the exam. He was ready this time around, and wasn't bothered in the least about the Bunshin being on the test. When Hinata, who gave him a look of worry when the exam was announced, caught his eye, Naruto merely winked at her, causing her to look away rapidly, and her face to redden. Naruto had to admit, Hinata was rather adorable when she blushed. Naruto's mind wandered back to his previous life, and the woman that she'd blossomed into, and Naruto couldn't help wondering how stupid he'd been ignoring her for Sakura.
'Yeah, not this time around, that was for sure.' Naruto thought. 'Although, I should probably wait until after training with Ero-Sennin, because dating her right now would make me feel like my pervert teacher...a dirty old man.'
It was nearly a half hour later when Naruto heard his name called. Standing from his seat, Naruto headed down the stairs in the classroom, passing closely by Hinata, and brushing against her shoulder. Hearing the girl squeak in surprise- and he just knew her face was beet red- Naruto grinned, and made for the next room.
"Alright Naruto, create three Bunshin, and you'll finally pass." Iruka said. Naruto gave a confident grin, put his hand in the cross ram seal, and while performing his signature technique, called out.
"Bunshin no Jutsu!" Much like his Bunshin, the Kage Bunshin that formed was just as useless. 'What, why didn't that work?'
"I'm sorry, Naruto, but you fail...again." Iruka said, his face filled with remorse.
"Aww, come on Iruka-sensei, I could do it the last time I tried it." Which was true, even if he hadn't used the jutsu since coming back.
"Give him a break, Iruka-sensei." Mizuki said. "It's his third time, and he did technically create a clone."
"I'm sorry, Mizuki, but it wouldn't be fair to the others." Iruka said. "Everyone else divided into three, and all Naruto managed to create was a single clone, and even that clone was useless. I cant let him pass."
As soon as he left the exam room, he went back into the classroom, grabbed a piece of chalk from the board, began going over his seal knowledge, because that was one of his biggest assets later, even as limited as it was. Naruto ignored the looks he was getting from the other members of his class, especially the ones who could partially see what it was he was writing on the board. To his surprise, his technique, and memory was flawless. Quickly erasing the board, he went to an open window, and tried to perform a simple Endan. Again, nothing happened. 'Hmm, so anything with mostly theoretical application, like seals, I can still do; but physical things like my jutsu, I can't. Damn it, that means all of my hard earned chakra control is gone again.'
Face distraught at the last thought, Naruto exited the classroom, then the building, then headed over to the small playground, and took up his seat on the swing.
"So, I noticed that you're having some trouble with your jutsu." NB's voice sounded in his head.
'Is that a part of the time travel?' Naruto thought back. 'Or are you pranking me by making me learn everything over?'
"That's part of the time travel." NB said. "You weren't even supposed to come back with your memories of the future, but that would kind of ruin the fun if that happened, right."
'That's true. So I have to relearn everything I knew?' Naruto asked, annoyed.
"Yes and no." NB said. "I was able to alter some things so you wouldn't have to start completely over. As you probably noticed with the Fuinjutsu, you have all the theory knowledge you had from before, but you have to reteach your body to perform the nin and taijutsu you haven't learned yet in canon...though only if you want access to it before you're supposed to learn it. After that, it'll be just like before. You're also the same power level- you know, strength, speed, chakra, etc.- as your previous canon self, since it didn't return with you, but since you're still knowledgable of your future training methods, you can use those to help speed up the process this time."
'Thank god for the Fourth Wall.' Naruto said, rubbing his hands together. 'I can't wait to have some fun with that.'
"About that, I gave you some restrictions regarding the Fourth Wall. Only a certain amount of changes per arc, although I might interfere if needed." In his mind, he added. 'With the exception of certain extremely cheating- even by ninja standards- members of the Akatsuki.'
'Wha- I can't believe that you gave me restrictions.' Naruto raged to NB.
"Just because you have a large amount of influence on things now, doesn't make you a Kami. Besides, it'll attract suspicion if people think you're suddenly too strong after being a dunce for most of your shinobi life."
Naruto couldn't deny that. He certainly didn't want to attract more negative attention from the fangirls and villagers for being better and stronger than Sasuke. Nor did he want to attract the interest of that creepy bastard Danzo. Sure the guy loved Konoha, and was extremely loyal, but Naruto didn't like his methods of operation.
"Also, I want to make sure that you don't get reliant on this like certain bastards got reliant on their bloodlines." Naruto grumbled, but acknowledged the point. He just had to bring up that bastard to win an argument. "Besides, the restrictions make it interesting, and the changes should mostly be used for emergencies. As I said, it'll help teach you some responsibility and wise decision making. You'll need that when you become Hokage."
'Great, I had to pick the one fucking author who wants me to learn life lessons while I'm having fun.' Naruto grumbled. 'I knew I should have went with SilverFang or Sketchfan. They'd have let me do what I want.'
"Yeah, but would they have been able to come up with some of the stuff that we plan on doing later?"
'Well no, but that's only because they're normal, sane people, and you're a sick, twisted bastard.'
"Hey, this sick, twisted bastard got you laid." NB argued. "And with several girls I know you wanted to, as well."
'True, but you also made me do my mom and Hinata's little sister.'
"Feh, your mom is hot, and fifty bucks says Hinata's sister wants to do you by the time she turns sixteen. Another twenty says she pursues you if you're still single. And another twenty after that says she shares you with Hinata if she's still single."
Naruto decided not to comment on that, as the only versions of Hanabi he knew, and had seen, were the 'precoscious' seven year old, and the 'too grown up for her own good' ten year old. Naruto was just about to ask about (something), when he was interrupted from his thoughts by Mizuki.
As he sat on the roof of his apartment with Mizuki, Naruto mostly ignored the man's ramblings about Iruka. He was telling Naruto things about his father figure that he already knew, and it was almost insulting for Mizuki to think he was more knowledgable about Iruka than he himself was. It wasn't until Mizuki mentioned that there was another, secret graduation test did Naruto actually listen to him.
It was another ten minutes before we found Naruto sneaking through the Hokage's home. Even with all of a Jounin's skill in stealth, it was damn near impossible to sneak up on the old man. While this wasn't the case with Naruto, there was still something nostalgic about hitting his Jiji with the Oiroke.
"Naruto, what are you doing in my home?" Hands in the seal for his 'Not Henge', Naruto called.
"Oiroke no Jutsu, Tsunade Centerfold."
When the smoke cleared away, there standing before the Sandaime was the form of his very busty female student...naked. Like a daughter she may be to him, Sarutobi was still a man who could appreciate the physical attributes of the beautiful woman that she grew into. The next few seconds found the venerable Hokage known as the Professor laying on the ground, a blood splatter on the wall, and a small puddle dripping from his nose. Further sneaking found Naruto the Forbidden Scroll, and after strapping it over his back, he climbed out a window, and took off to place Mizuki had told him he was to meet his examiner.
Once he arrived, Naruto opened the scroll, and began to read the instructions for his favorite jutsu. This time, he takes the time to fully peruse the jutsus instructions, before performing the jutsu. After he'd finished, and realized just how awesome, and how much potential the jutsu had in his hands, Naruto formed the familiar seal. Hoping that it worked, he gathered his chakra, and tried to create ten Kage Bunshin. He got thirteen.
"Oh well, at least it works now." Naruto said. "I'll just have to work on my chakra control."
He was about to roll the scroll back up, before a sudden thought struck him. He had the time, he may as well learn another jutsu. A quick perusal found another interesting technique, the Bunshin Bakuha. Knowing that trying to learn that techinique at the moment, and the numerous explosions that would result, would bring about his discovery faster than he could learn it. Creating a few Kage Bunshin, he had one Henge into a blank scroll, and another Henge into an ink pot. He then copied the instructions for the Bunshin Bakuha. Once he was done, he handed everything to one of the extra clones that had come, and told him to head back to the apartment and copy it on a real scroll.
"And make sure the inkpot isn't dispelled before you finish, or the ink will disappear too." Naruto told the clone. Nodding, the clone hopped away to his assigned task. After that had been taken care of, naruto opened the scroll even further, and began studying the last technique on the scroll...the one detailing the jutsu that sealed the fox inside him until the others arrived.
Now since I'm sure everyone reading this is pretty much familiar with what happens next, I won't bother you with the details. With the exception of Naruto not reacting to being told he was Kyuubi, nothing really changed. It wasn't until Mizuki had Iruka cornered that things got interesting.
"I had planned to kill you later, but I've changed my mind." Mizuki said, spinning his giant shuriken. "Just die." As the Chuunin charged, Iruka gave a slight smirk, ready to face his death. He knew that Mizuki wouldn't get the scroll. Naruto was better at evading people than most of the ninja in the village. Two meters from death, a shadow intervened, kneeing Mizuki in the chin. As Mizuki was knocked backwards from the strength of the blow, the shuriken flew off into the woods, lodging into the chest of the surprised Root ninja who'd been spying on the scene taking place. Struggling to his feet, Mizuki glared before growling.
"You shouldn't have done that." Naruto glared right back.
"Touch Iruka-sensei, and I'll kill you." And unlike the first time he'd said it, Naruto felt he could go through with it this time.
"You idiot, why'd you come back." Iruka shouted. "You should have just run away."
"Heh, a little punk like you, I'll kill you in one shot." Mizuki boasted.
"Not if I deal with you first." Naruto returned, bringing his hand into a very familiar seal. "Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" And suddenly, Mizuki wasn't feeling so bold anymore. There was orange all over the place. In the clearing, in the surrounding forest, up in the trees, everywhere.
"What's going on?"
"What's wrong, teme?" The Naruto's teased. "I thought you were going to kill me with one shot. Fine, if you're not going to..."
With that, an orange clad figure darted forward, and kneed Mizuki in the chin. Three more slid beneath him, and kicked him into the air, while a final clone springboarded off the first one's head into the air. With a triumphant yell, he performed the same move he'd used on Kiba in the Chuunin Exams. But Naruto wasn't quite done with Mizuki yet, oh no, that bastard had more coming for sabotaging his taijutsu education. While this was going on, all of the other clones had jumped into the air, and performed a mass Henge. What appeared was a giant pair of hands performing the tiger seal. This seal then began a rapid descent towards the ground, aiming directly for a particularly vulnerable spot that just so happened to be poking up in the air after Naruto's team attack.
Iruka gave a pained wince as the attack hit home, and vowed to castrate Kakashi on principle alone.
'Sennin Goroshi.' He thought. 'I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy, especially not the way Naruto just used it.'
"Hehe, oops." Naruto said, but his tone was completely unapologetic. And thus, Naruto once again graduated under suspicious circumstances.
888
The next day, as Naruto was turning in his completed registration form, the meeting was interrupted by a small child barging into the room.
"Fight me, old man." The brat yelled, before tripping over his own, overly long scarf. Naruto sighed.
'He's not even my apprentice yet, and he's already embarrassing me.' Naruto thought. The next moment, the boy jumped to his feet, looked around the room, and pointed at Naruto.
"You, you tripped me." He yelled. "You set up some kind of trap."
"Uh, no, you tripped over your scarf, or possibly your own feet."
"No way, it's your fault." Konohamaru yelled. "Just when I'd gotten the drop on him, and had him beat, you go and ruin things for me."
"You really think you can beat him?" Naruto asked, Konohamaru, already knowing the answer.
"Yup." Naruto couldn't help the snort of laughter that came.
"Let me put this into perspective for you runt." Sarutobi almost choked on his pipe hearing such a large word come from Naruto, but smiled knowing that he was at least smarter than he'd feared given the boy's poor academic performance. "I could beat you with my eyes closed and one hand tied behind my back. You could probably hold your breath for ten times the length of time it would take jiji to beat me. You haven't got a chance right now, so stop being stupid." The last four words were punctuated by Naruto bopping the kid on the skull, much like Sakura and Tsunade had been fond of doing to him. He then rounded on Ebisu. "And you!"
"Me?" The man asked pointing at himself.
"How dare you call yourself an elite tutor putting ideas like that in his head. There are no shortcuts to becoming Hokage, any ninja worth their shit knows that. If this is the kind of stuff you're going to be teaching kids, I hope you never make Jounin and get a Genin squad of your own. They'd end up getting themselves killed on a stinking D-rank with you leading them." So shocked was Ebisu at Naruto declaration, that he didn't notice that Naruto had walked up to him, until he felt a searing pain in his shin. "Dummy."
888
Walking down the streets of Konoha, Naruto couldn't help the growl that came from him.
"That fucking idiot is going to get those three killed, I just know it." Naruto raged. "Well screw this, I'm not letting that happen. I'm going to get myself promoted at the Chuunin Exams, and then I'm going to become a Jounin, so that I can get them as my own squad." Naruto suddenly felt something on the edge of his senses. 'Speak of the little devil.' Turning to the section of the fence where the wood ran horizontal instead of vertical, Naruto spoke. "Y'know, if you're going to use that technique, you should probably get the directions of the wood right." The curtain fell.
"Hah, I new you'd see through my disguise." Konohamaru said. "I'll make you my boss. With you teaching me, I'll defintely become the Hokage. So please teach me the Sexy Jutsu you used to defeat my grandpa."
"You remember what I said about there being no shortcuts to Hokage, right?" Naruto asked.
"Yeah boss, but making grandpa pass out with a nosebleed seems like it would be funny." The boy answered. Naruto found that he couldn't disagree there.
"Okay, I'll teach you." Naruto said. "Just don't do it too often. He's old, and you don't wanna accidentally hurt him too bad, right?" Konohamaru shook his head. "So how come you were so determined to defeat jiji, and becomes Hokage?"
"No one ever calls my by my name." Konohamaru grumbled. "Everyone always addresses me as the Hokage's grandson, and they always give me special treatment because of it."
"Hmm, that kind of sucks." Naruto said. "Well, come on, let's go get you learned up. First though, we're gonna have to borrow one of those pervy books, so you can get an idea of what kind of girl you want to change into." And the corruption began.
888
"Hey Naruto," Exclaimed Random-Genin-Number-5-Who-Would-Never-Amount-To-More-Than-A-Filler-Character. "Only those that passed are supposed to be here."
"Yes, well, Mizuki decided to turn traitor, and steal the Forbidden Scroll." Naruto said. "I helped apprehend him, and learned the Kage Bunshin, which is like the Academy jutsu on steroids. The Hokage decided to give me a field promotion." The boy's retort was interrupted by another voice.
"Excuse me." Sakura said. "Will you let me through?" The boy moved, and Sakura bore down on him. "Naruto, move your ass, I want to sit on the other side of you."
"Hey, why the hell did you ask him nicely, but then yell at me?" Naruto asked.
"Shut up." Sakura yelled, hitting him in the head. Naruto barely winced at the strike, and had to hid a grin when Sakura shook her hand a bit in pain.
"You know what, forget it." Naruto said as Naruto was about to get up. "I had a nightmare last night about today." He said. "Long story short, something happened dealing with his fangirls, Sasuke and I ended up face to face glaring at each other. Someone bumped into me, which then resulted in me kissing the teme. Just in case something like that happens for real, I'm sitting next to Hinata, so that I'll at least end up kissing someone I want to."
"Eep!" Thud! Needless to say, Hinata lost consciousness, and her face was very red.
"Aww, she's so cute when she does that." As Naruto watched, almost feeling sorry for the bastard, Ino came in, and a fight between the two biggest fangirls broke out. Unable to take the squabbling any longer, and curious as to what it was about Sasuke tht they liked, Naruto spoke up.
"Okay, someone please explaing to me why it is that you like Sasuke, again?" Naruto asked.
"Because he's so dark and mysterious, he's really handsome, he's a great ninja, he's all aloof and cool, and he seems so in need of love, but keeps stubbornly pushing everyone away." Sakura said.
"Or maybe you're all just in denial of the fact that he wants absolutely nothing to do with any of you, and doesn't consider any of you worth his time." The outcry of anger that resulted from this comment made Naruto shake his head.
"He just doesn't want to get close to people after what happened to his family." Ino said. "He's so great."
"God, I feel like such a fucking moron." Naruto said. Ino looked to comment, but was cut off when he continued. "I've been an orphan my whole life, and had the entire village hate me and treat me like garbage for things beyond my control. Do you mean to tell me that if I wanted someone to care for me and love me, then instead of foolishly trying to get attention and be accepted, I should have been trying to push people away and isolate myself? I'll admit, I might not have the emo or handsome thing going for me so much, but I've got just as good a sob story as Sasuke-teme does, and unlike him, mine actually involves my life being in danger...every year...on my birthday, no less."
"Sasuke-kun's life was in danger." Random fangirl number thirteen cried. "His brother was so strong, Sasuke was so brave for facing him."
'Not brave, stupid.' Naruto thought. 'Even I wouldn't go after Itachi, and I beat Pein.'
"I doubt it." Naruto said. "Itachi killed the best the clan had to offer with ease, so I highly doubt he felt at all threatened by teme, and there were kids younger than Sasuke there, so it wasn't because he was just a kid. If Itachi had truly intended to kill Sasuke, he'd have done it, so I highly doubt Sasuke's life was ever in any real danger." Sasuke's eyes narrowed. As much as he hated to admit it, the Dobe did make some sense. So why did Itachi spare him.
"Well, you're still not a great ninja like Sasuke-kun." Ino taunted.
"For his age you mean." Naruto said. "Great ninja in general tend to have made names for themselves outside of their village, and tend to have A-S rankings in the Bingo Book." Ino stuck her tongue out at him. "And I might not be the best ninja, but I figure that being able to use a Jounin level jutsu as easily as I can, as well as being able to evade and outwit Anbu dressed in bright orange, should be worth something."
"Yeah right, Naruto, like you could outwit Anbu." Ino said, rolling her eyes.
"Actually, if you ask any Anbu that's been there for at least a year, I'm sure they'll have some interesting stories to tell you." A voice suddenly interrupted. "I remember a certain incident with laxatives and a lack of toilet tissue."
"I still say I'd have gotten away if a certain old geezer hadn't tripped me up." A clearing of the throat brought attention to the Hokage. "Oops, sorry Jiji." He was suddenly chastized by half a dozen people yelling at him to respect the Hokage. "Whatever. So, what are you doing here? Isn't Iruka sensei supposed to be giving out our team assignments?"
"Iruka...ahem. One of our Special Jounin decided to uh...help Iruka on his road to recovery last night, and he's not going to make it." Naruto snickered at the Hokage's red face. 'Already?' The reply that he received made it difficult for him to keep a straight face. He couldn't disagree, though. Iruka really needed to get laid, and Anko did have a crush on him, so why not? "Now take your seats, I'm going to read off your teams. The teams are as follows."
888
Naruto, having just decided on a filling lunch of Ichiraku ramen, could be found headed in the direction of the small stand. He'd stayed behind, and talked to the Hokage about possibly getting a change of team, maybe to Kurenai's team, he could easily replace Kiba. Unfortunately, his reasons for wanting the switch- Sasuke being a bastard, Sakura being annoying, and wanting to have easier access to his new hobby of making Hinata blush- weren't enough to get him the change he wanted.
As he made his way to Ichiraku's, he spotted Sakura several meters ahead, sitting on a bench across from a small stand that specialized in Onigiri. Remembering what happened this day in his first life, Naruto decided that now might be a good time to start Sakura down the road of healing. With a quick dip behind a bush, and an even quicker Henge, Naruto came back out, and continued his stroll. As he came upon the girl, he heard her voice.
"Sasuke-kun!" Sakura called. "Would you like to join me for lunch? I accidentally ordered too much." Naruto looked at the portion, and had to fight back a groan. The order was barely fit for a child of Konohamaru's size, and it was obvious that she had barely touched it.
"Sakura," He replied dully. He then inwardly shivered. Being so emo and emotionless left you with a creepy feeling. "You're so smart, that you're stupid." Sakura's look of shock was priceless. "Stop starving yourself, it's sickening. And stop chasing me, and go after someone that actually wants to be with you before they lose interest and you end up alone." With that, Naruto continued his stroll down the street to his favorite restaurant.
"Sasuke-kun?" Sakura asked his retreating back.
"What was that?" Inner Sakura yelled.
"I think he wants me to go out with Naruto." Inner Sakura was silent in disbelief, before something occurred to her.
"Wait, you think Sasuke-kun might have been testing us?" She asked. "You know, to see if we'd be loyal to him. Like if we'd betray him for another boy, or if we really loved him."
"You're right." Sakura said, aloud, scaring a small girl who was walking past. "Well, I'm not going to stray."
"Don't worry Sasuke-kun, you're the only man for us, Shannaro!"
Yep, she really needs to stop listening to that Inner Persona...she totally missed the point on that one.
888
Kakashi snickered to himself as he strolled leisurely down the hallway. Stopping outside the door, he listened in for a little bit, before announcing himself.
"Grr, where is he?" Sakura groused. "He's like three hours late, and Naruto's not even back yet either, where is that moron?" Curiosity getting the better of him, Kakashi entered the room, and sure enough there were only two Genin sitting in the room.
"Hmm, after reading your files, my first impression would have been that I didn't like you guys." Kakashi said. "But since you've managed to lose a teammate before you even started as a team, I'm going to ammend my opinion. You guys suck. Meet me on the roof."
With that, Kakashi Shunshined away, planning on having a Kage Bunshin search for his wayward pupil. Imagine his shock, when upon reaching the roof of the building, he found his student already waiting for him, casually munching on a bowl of ramen. Once the other two arrived, Sakura immediately stomped over, and punched her wayward teammate for not coming back on time.
"Here I was thinking that you might like some alone time with your precious Sasuke-kun." Naruto returned. "Hmph, last time I try to be nice to you." Sakura had the good grace to look ashamed, but quickly played it off.
"Well, now that we're all here, how about introductions?" Kakashi said. "You know, likes, dislikes, hobbies, dreams for the future."
"Uh, sensei, why don't you go first?" Sakura asked. "Show us what to do."
"Fine, my name is Kakashi Hatake, I like-" Kakashi was startled to find the spiel he'd been so looking forward to delivering interrupted.
"Icha Icha Paradise (specifically chapter six), annoying Gai-sensei, being late just to annoy people, and making up ridiculous excuses for why you're late. You dislike what happened to your father, Danzo for spearheading the scandal that followed, and the fact that Obito was killed saving your ass. Your hobbies include reading Icha Icha in public just to piss people off, and taunting Gai-sensei. Your dreams for the future are to see Icha Icha made into a movie, and maybe star in one opposite Yukie Fujikaze." Kakashi eye-smiled, but inwardly was a little wary of the blond. How had anyone been able to figure out so much about him, especially the part about Yukie?
"You seem to know an awful lot about me." Kakashi said. "May I ask how?"
"I did my research." Naruto said. "A person can get a lot done with a couple dozen Kage Bunshin and three hours to kill. Not to mention, there are a lot of annoyed people willing to give up the dirt about you."
"Since you want to be so cheeky, why don't you go next?" Naruto shrugged.
'You all already know who I am. I like ramen, training, how cute Hinata-chan gets when she blushes, and gardening to an extent. I used to like Sakura, but then I realized that I'm not into masochism. I dislike arrogant emo bastards, people who look down on others, people who judge prematurely, fangirls who starve themselves because they're trying to keep thin, while foolishly putting their teammates in danger because they aren't gaining any muscle tone that is crucial to being a shinobi. I also dislike late sensei who obsess over one student, and ignore their others. Most importantly, I dislike the three minutes it takes to cook instant ramen. My hobbies include taking care of my plant, learning about seals, and trying new flavors of ramen at Ichiraku. My dreams for the future, prevent Sasuke from betraying Konoha for vengeance, prevent Sakura from betraying Konoha for Sasuke, and to not get pre-maturely killed again. After that, maybe I'll marry Hinata and have a bunch of kids, and become Hokage.' Naruto thought all of this, but decided to just keep things as simple as possible.
"You already know who I am. I like stuff, and I dislike stuff, but that's not important. My new hobby is seeing how much I can make Hinata-chan blush, and I hope to marry my cute little Hina-chan and become Hokage one day." Naruto inwardly smirked, enjoying the shocked scowl on Sasuke's face, the look of annoyed betrayal on Kakashi's, and the combo of shocked and betrayed on Sakura's, though why she sported the latter expression, he didn't know.
Naruto mostly tuned out the rest of the meeting, already knowing what was going to happen; only paying enough attention to comment on the introductions. His "Why am I not at all surprised?" after Sakura's rant resulted in his having to dodge her fist. Being betrayed by the girl had taken a lot of the shine out of Sakura that had been there, and he couldn't help the feeling of annoyance at the girl she used to be, and how often she took swings at him for no apparent reason. We'll skip what he said to Sasuke, but suffice it to say, he had to dodge Sakura's fist again.
Once they'd been dismissed, again he took great happiness out of watching Sakura and Sasuke's reactions to the bell test, Naruto decided now was as good a time as any to lay some foundation.
"Okay, since we're a team now, I think it prudent that we establish some ground rules." At their shocked looks, Naruto rolled his eyes. "Rule number one, I don't care how cool your fangirls think it makes you look, Sasuke, while we're on duty, no brooding about your brother. Do that shit on your own time. Rule number two, I don't care how you feel about Sasuke, Sakura, no fangirling while we're on duty. Obsessing over Sasuke when you're supposed to be paying attention to a mission can get us killed." Glaring, Sakura interrupted.
"Rule number three, Naruto, no more asking me out on dates." She gave him a smirk, to which he shrugged.
"That's fine." Naruto said. "I'd rather date Hinata anyway." He missed the look of utter shock and hurt when he turned to Sasuke. "Teme?"
"Is that all?" Sasuke growled. "I have some training to do." Naruto shrugged, and the broody boy left.
"You know, as much as he thinks about Itachi, one might mistake him for having a Brother Complex." Naruto leaned back to avoid a swing from Sakura. "Rule number four, no more trying to hit me for stupid reasons that only make sense to yourself."
888
"Grr, where are they?" Sakura yelled. "He told us to be here at 8, and he's almost three hours late."
"Yo," Kakashi said.
"YOU'RE LATE!" Sakura screamed. Kakashi was about to reply, but noticed that he was missing a Genin.
"Hmm, looks like we're missing someone." It was at this point that Naruto arrived via the tree line from another training ground where he'd been working on regaining his chakra control, and where about three dozen clones were still trying to either stick leaves to their foreheads, or climb a tree.
"YOU'RE LATE, NARUTO!" Sakura screamed, only to receive a grin from the blond, who then proceeded to turn and look at Kakashi as he answered.
"Sorry I'm late, but I got lost on a train of thought, and missed my stop." Kakashi's mouth dropped open as Sakura screamed.
"LYER!" Not only had the gaki stolen his introduction, but he stole his thing...and even had a better excuse. It would seem that he was going to have to have a talk with his student about gimick infringement.
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As Naruto hid from his sensei, he couldn't help but chuckle. He'd been the only one to eat breakfast, just as he knew he would be. As he sat in the tree, watching Kakashi stand there, he couldn't help but feel a deep seeded desire to try and fight Kakashi. When an image of Kakashi in the Sennin Goroshi pose, and not himself, but Sasuke flying through the air, he knew where the desire came from.
Kakashi stood in the clearing, his face not showing it, but he was very wary. He could sense Sasuke hiding in a tree on one side of the clearing, and Sakura hiding beneath a bush. Naruto...Naruto had just disappeared. He'd been on a few of the early Naruto chases, and had to admit the boy had talent in stealth and evasion, even at seven. He'd already retired from Anbu by the time Naruto's abilities evading the Anbu had reached their legendary status. He hadn't wanted to believe Yuugao or Yamato when they'd told him the boy could almost disappear at will, but now he was finding himself truly impressed.
Just as suddenly as the boy had disappeared, Kakashi found himself staring at his blond student.
"I know I probably don't stand a chance, but I'd like to see how I stack up against a Jounin." Naruto said. He knew that theoretically he had nearly surpassed Kakashi, but physically, that was no longer the case. "Especially one as infamous as Sharingan Kakashi."
Naruto wasted no time going on the attack. While it wouldn't be nearly as fluid as before, and was almost useless without Sage Chakra- at least until he could gain enough control to safely channel chakra to his limbs to enhance his strikes like normal shinobi were able to, without blowing up his arms and legs in the process- his Frog Kata was still a formidable Taijutsu style. Leading with a punch that was easily blocked, Naruto followed up with a spinning backhand to the other side. Kakashi also blocked this, but got a surprise when Naruto suddenly bent his arm to try for an elbow to the temple. Kakashi released him, and bent his head back to dodge the blow, before tossing Naruto away.
"Hmm, seems you're better than your file suggested." Kakashi said, both pleased and annoyed. "Looks like I won't even have time for Icha Icha." Looking on, both Sakura and Sasuke were wondering where this suddenly level of skill had come from, because he sure hadn't had it when he was in the Academy.
"Well that didn't work." Naruto groaned, his hands forming a cross ram seal. "Time to take this up another notch. Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!"
Six Narutos appeared, and sparing less than a tic to grin at his sensei, all seven Narutos attacked at once. It was a testament to Kakashi's skill, that he was able to defend himself against the surprise attack from all seven. Despite the lack intelligence and natural talent that Naruto had possessed as an adolescent, his unpredictability still made him fairly capable as a shinobi. With some actual skill to back up Naruto's uniquely unusual skillset, so many of the blond could easily overwhelm even a higher level Chuunin.
Still, Kakashi wasn't an elite for nothing. Two blocks, three dodges, and a captured fist later, Kakashi gave an eyesmile before flashing into action, dispersing Kage Bunshin with a speed that Naruto wouldn't be able to keep up with for another four years in normal continuity. When there was only one left, Kakashi again gave Naruto an eyesmile.
"Well, I'll admit I'm impressed." Kakashi said. "For a moment, I thought little Uchiha-chan might be the only one on the team with any ability."
"Let's try this again." Naruto said, creating another squad of clones, this time double the number. At first he'd only wanted to see how he'd stack up against his sensei. Now though, he wanted to get one of those bells.
With a gesture, half of the Kage Bunshin attacked, while the rest disappeared. Giving Naruto a calculating look, Kakashi readied himself. The attack came just a bit faster than before, but this time, Kakashi was ready for it, and wasn't surprised by the skill of the clones. With an almost ease that annoyed the blond, Kakashi dispatched of the clones. Just as he'd taken out the last with a lazy flick of a shuriken, the real Naruto attacked.
Naruto threw a left kick that Kakashi ducked, but is again surprised when the boy pivots, and brings the foot back around, striking even faster than before. Kakashi blocks the attack by grabbing Naruto's leg, and almost gets clocked when the other foot makes a follow-up attempt on on his head. After grabbing this leg as well, Kakashi realized what position the blond was now in. Not giving the boy a chance to go for the bells which were within his reach, Kakashi brought his knee up to give the boy a shot to the sternum.
Imagine his surprise when the boy he was holding dispersed into smoke, throwing his balance off for a moment. Naruto wasted zero time trying to capitalize, as several more clones came at Kakashi from all sides in a distraction. While Kakashi was busy engaging them, another Naruto suddenly shot out of the ground, and went for the bells. Kakashi only just dodged in time with a Kawarimi- causing several of the clones to end up attacking another of Naruto's clones- but Naruto was already on the attack, a plan already goign through his mind.
A clone at his back, Naruto went in for a punch, but found his plan derailed immediately. Kakashi again used a Kawarimi, but this time with the clone that was tailing him. Naruto's punch dispersed the startled clone, and set Kakashi up for his next attack.
"A ninja isn't supposed to get caught from behind." Kakashi said, seriously. Sakura tried to yell a warning, but as Kakashi would inform him seconds later with a glint in his eye. "Too late. Hiden Konoha Ninpou: Sennin Goroshi!"
One thing that Naruto had learned about the Kawarimi, so your long as your chakra could overpower that of the target after the chakra for the jutsu was used (though catching your target off guard would allow someone with a weaker chakra to do the same), you could switch with anything, even other people. And if there was one thing that Naruto knew, it was that he could switch places with all of his teammates. A millisecond before Kakashi's thrust forward fingers connected, there was a puff of smoke, and Naruto was no longer standing in front of him, but a startled and confused Sasuke. Too bad for the Uchiha, he was already committed to the attack, and there was no way to stop it now.
As Kakashi watched the Uchiha genius fly through the air from his chakra enhanced ass poke, he couldn't help but smile beneath his mask.
'Using others as a meatshield to avoid embarrassing situations,' Kakashi thought. 'He is his mother's son after all. Oh well, I'll have to catch him later...now to play with the others.' A quick Shunshin later, and Kakashi was gone.
888
From his place in Sasuke's former hiding spot, Naruto plotted his next move. Feeling out with his senses, Naruto located Sakura, and headed in that direction, knowing that she was next on Kakashi's torture list. He arrived just in time to hear his sensei say.
"Sakura, behind you." The pinkette turned, only to find Kakashi staring at her with his hands in a rat seal. A massive swirl of leaves later, and Sakura saw her sensei disappear. Eyes drooping drowsily, Sakura began to sway, a bit before snapping back to wakefulness.
"Huh, what was that?" Sakura asked. "Where'd he go?"
Sakura found herself very wary of the fact that Kakashi-sensei had snuck up behind her...she didn't want to be ass poked after all. A moment later she shook her head, grumbling about overly dramatic sensei using so many leaves to Shunshin away; he hadn't used that many before. Just as she was about to go continue her search for Sasuke, she heard a voice behind her that made her heart flutter call her name.
"Sasuke-kun?" She said turning, a bright smile on her face. The smile rapidly fell to make way for a paled, horror stricken visage when she caught sight of her beloved.
He was kneeling on the ground, barely holding himself up with the help of a tree. There were kunai and shuriken sticking out of his arms, back, and chest, each would bleeing freely. His left leg was broken at the shin, the foot turned facing backwards in a sickening manner. The most serious injuries however, were his missing right eye, and the decapitated left arm which had been cut off from just above the elbow down. Her brain tried to come to terms with what it was seeing and what she knew. Sasuke-kun was the best, and nothing like this could ever happen to him...yet she could see just as plain as day that it had happened.
From his perch above Kakashi, Naruto snickered when he saw Sakura's eyes go wide, tears begin to fall, but he almost started laughing when she screamed, and started foaming at the mouth. He could remember the time they'd been reminiscing about that first bell test, and she'd revealed what Kakashi forced her to see. For a thirteen year old fangirl- who Sakura had even admitted was ill-fit to be a ninja- that event was suitably traumatizing
"I think I might have overdone it." Kakashi said.
"Nah, she needs a fangirl rude awakening." Naruto said, startling the Jounin. "I say you went easy on her. Don't worry, I'm not going to attack you again yet, I'm here for Sakura. Go play with Sasuke, now. I'm sure he's recovered from being molested, and is ready to prove he's better than you." Kakashi gave Naruto a queer look, before disappearing in a swirl of leaves.
Naruto gave a sigh, before dropping to the ground next to his still frothing teammate. A quick Henge later, and Sasuke Uchiha stood in the clearing. Squatting, Naruto placed his hand on her shoulder, and channeled some chakra into the unconscious girl, before backing up. A second later, Sakura shot up, gasping for breath, in a panic.
"Sasuke-kun!" She cried out.
"What?" Naruto asked, imitating the other boy. Sakura turned, and eyes wider than he'd ever seen them, tackled him to the ground, and hugged him tightly.
"Sasuke-kun, you're alright." She said. "I thought you were...but I saw you-"
"Tch, Kakashi used a Genjutsu on you, Sakura." Her crush told her, causing her to blush in embarrassment. "Look, we don't have much time left. I'm going to go find Naruto before he embarrasses us even more, stay here, and don't move. Matter of fact, do nothing but sit there and breathe." Turning, Naruto leapt up into the trees, and took off to where he could sense a large flare of chakra.
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While Naruto was attending to Sakura, Sasuke had recovered from his rectal violation, and returned for vengeance. Kakashi eyed the dark haired Genin glaring at him contemptuously with curiosity.
"Something tells me I won't be able to read my book with you either." Kakashi said sizing up the dark haired boy facing him, before putting said book away. Turns out he was right, and while the boy had as impressive a showing as Naruto's surprising attack, let's be honest. A Genin facing a Jounin is really an unfair fight.
By the time Naruto arrived at the sight of Sasuke's attempt at the bells, his teammate was already neck deep in dirt.
"I don't know about you, but I want to kick this bastard's ass," Naruto said, squatting in front of Sasuke's head. "And I'm even willing to work with you to do it."
"Fine, he's going to pay for that jutsu." Sasuke growled. "And I'm going to get you back for switching with me too, dobe."
"Right, follow me, Sakura's waiting." Naruto said, ignoring Sasuke's threat. "You know, if someone Henged into you, they could get her to do damn near anything. She better hope some pervert doesn't figure that out, or she could be in trouble."
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Naruto sat with a somewhat excited expression on his face as he took in his sensei. The look of complete confusion on the man brought a smile to his features- though unless you knew to look at his eyes, and what exactly you were looking for, you'd never notice. Naruto could read his sensei like a book now...but even he could admit that sometimes it was an overly complicated book with unnecessarily big words.
Although they hadn't gotten the bells, there was no doubt that they had passed the test. In the five minutes that they'd attacked together, all three of them had touched the bells at least once, and Sasuke had even gotten a hold of one of them, before Kakashi had done something to his hand to make him let go. From what he could see, Kakashi was in a bind. On the one hand, he was proud of them, and was looking forward to take a team, evne if just to shut his naysayers up that he couldn't handle it. On the other, he was mourning the loss of precious reading time. Kakashi stared at them for a few moments longer, before giving his infamous eyesmile.
"Congratulations, you passed."
"But sensei, we didn't get the bells." Sakura said.
"We weren't supposed to." Naruto said. "Even with three fairly talented Genin, us winning against a Jounin is a complete joke. The whole point of this was about testing our teamwork. He threw in the part about only two of us passing to see if we'd turn on each other, or if we'd act like proper Leaf Shinobi and work together, anyway. I mean really, did either of you bother to remember the lecture we got on that? All Genin squads are three Genin to a Jounin, unless one of them is lost on a mission. Even telling us not to eat was a test in seeing if we could think for ourselves, or if we'd take things at face value."
"Then how do you explain apprenticeships?" Kakashi teased. "I could have been looking to find a proper apprentice."
"That's true, but not likely." Naruto said. "In an apprenticeship, the sensei is even mroe responsible for their pupil than traditionally, as in almost a parent role. You're far too lazy to be bothered with the responsibilities of apprenticing a student."
"Since when have you been so smart?" Sakura accused.
"What, did you really think I was that stupid?" Naruto asked in disbelief, knowing full well that he really had been that stupid, but needing an excuse not to be this time. Playing dumb was annoying.
"What, are you telling us that you were hiding behind a mask of stupidity to protect yourself from something or someone?" Sakura asked.
'Note to self, make sure Sakura isn't from the future too.' Naruto thought. 'Never mind. She wouldn't be as pathetic as she is if she were. I'm gonna have to do something about that quickly.'
"Not a mask, per se." Naruto said. "Look, deception is a ninja's greatest tool. I downplayed the fact that I'm not a complete idiot, so that people would underestimate me. Let me ask you this. If me and Sasuke ended up in a fight against an enemy Chuunin or Jounin, who is most likely to survive that fight?"
"Sasuke-kun of course." Sakura said, immediately. Kakashi initially would have been putting his money on Sasuke, but something made him pause that thought.
"Really, Sakura?" Naruto asked. "Then why don't you consider this. Sasuke is an Uchiha, the Rookie of the year, very talented, and never passes up a chance to show off just how much better he is than everyone. I, on the other hand, was the class deadlast, have never shown any talent for the shinobi arts, and just barely graduated. Which of us is the Chuunin liable to take as a serious threat? Sasuke. Who is the Chunin more liable to fight seriously, not wanting to risk a brat getting lucky? Sasuke. Who is more liable to be killed right off the bat, the talented show off with only a C-class Katon to his name, or the supposedly no talent kid, who can spam hundreds of Kage Bunshin like they're nothing?"
"Sasuke." Kakashi said, nodding to the blond. "Hmm, seems like Naruto was the smarter shinobi after all."
"Not really, I got the idea from Shikamaru." Naruto admitted falsely. "He may be a lazy bum, and I doubt he was intentionlly doing it, but downplaying how skilled you really are was a good idea."
As the team separated, Kakashi pulling Naruto aside briefly to discuss certain infringement issues, the Jounin could only marvel at this team of his. While two out of his three Genin had been just as their profiles had said, his third had been something of a surprise. Though if Iruka was to be believed about his unpredictability, Naruto had rather potently lived up to expectations as well.
888
It was a bit under twenty-four hours later that found Naruto headed to his team training grounds. He knew they'd be starting their missions today after waiting hours for Kakashi to show, and a bit of training, and had planned accordingly.
During the several hour wait for Kakashi to arrive, Naruto had worked on reorienting his body into instinctually using the Frog Kata. While this was going on, several dozen clones each were working on leaf sticking, and tree climbing.
None of his clones could make it up a tree yet, but Naruto wasn't worried. By the time he dispelled them, and started doing the exercise for himself, he'd have the technique mastered, and its only real use would be for continued chakra control. Hopefully, by the time they got the Wave Mission, if they even got it this time, he'd have started his clones on combining the two exercises he was working on.
As he was winding down, Naruto felt a familiar chakra signature tickle his senses. Sending out a small chakra pulse, he found, to his amusement, Hinata watching him. Kind of an odd way to want to spend your lunch break, but he wasn't going to complain. As long as she was interested in him, he had a chance at not screwing things up with her like last time.
"Hey, Hinata." Naruto exclaimed. "Did you need something, or did you just come to watch me work up a nice...hard...sweat?" Straining his ears, Naruto was able to hear the telltale thump of Hinata's- faint-induced- unconscious body hitting the ground. Naruto swiftly finished his exercises, and strolled over to where she had landed. Sighing, Naruto picked the girl up, and carried her to where Kurenai's team would be meeting to begin their mission for the day. He just hoped Kiba hadn't returned yet. Given that horndog's- sometimes overly possessive- infatuation with Hinata, that was bound to be an annoying meeting.
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Naruto had just finished receiving a quick lesson on tree climbing- after all, a paper trail in this situation lessened suspicion- when he heard the shriek of Sakura's voice yelling at Kakashi for being late. While he didn't have any real attraction to Sakura anymore, he couldn't help the slightly naughty thought that came to his mind. If she was that loud normally, he hated to see what she'd be like when someone finally got into the prudish, yaio perv's pants, and really made her scream. Shaking his head of that thought, desperate to keep himself from thinking of Sakura in that manner ever again, Naruto redonned his jacket, and made his way to the team meeting.
"Naruto, you're late." Sakura yelled, he heard as soon as he cleared the tree line.
"Sorry I'm late, but Kurenai-sensei put me in time out for making Hinata-chan blush and faint." Kakashi's mouth dropped open, again. He thought he'd gotten the gaki to understand that lateness and bad excuses were his thing. Though, he had to admit, Naruto's excuses were actually pretty good, which technically wasn't gimick infringement. Damn!
Naruto rolled his eyes when Sasuke and Sakura perked up after Kakashi told them that there were going to start taking missions. Boy were they going to be disappointed. Now that he knew the true purpose of D-rank missions, and not that bullshit teamwork crap that Kakashi went on about (though he realized that they'd probably needed the teamwork part drilled in before he taught them the other part), he was going to let the mission bother him. Hell, getting paid to do things that were so easy- well, easy if you knew how to do it right- was the best thing going right now.
Besides, he now several different ways to make many of the more horrifying D-rank jobs easier, and less traumatizing. Naruto rubbed his hands, and almost cackled evilly. He couldn't wait until they got that babysitting job. The Inuguchi triplets were in for a rude awakening if they thought they were going to get away with the shit they normally pulled on Genin babysitters. They were going to pay for dying his hair black, and doubly so if they turned Hinata-chan blue again.
888
They had been a team for three weeks, and sadly nothing in the routine had changed- well, with the exception of their mission success rate, and the number they'd been able to do. Kakashi still showed up late, prompting him to show up even later, with much better excuses than his sensei he might add. Sasuke and Sakura still sat there wasting three hours that could be put to better use, just waiting on their sensei, and basically wasting their potential. Naruto finally decided to do something about it, after he took care of one small detail that he really should have taken care of sooner, but supplies were hard to come by on his budget, and he didn't want to borrow from jiji too much now that he was a ninja.
He'd sat for almost an hour in the next training ground over from the one his team used, as a Shadow Clone applied the training seals that he'd used during his training trip with Jiraiya; while the application didn't take much time at all, waiting for the ink to dry did. Without going into too much detail, because Naruto had tuned out most of Jiraiya's explanation, they would put a resisting strain on his body that would increase his strength, speed, chakra reserves, and even his chakra control to a small extent. Afterwards, Naruto ran through the first two forms of the Frog Kata real time against a clone, since he'd need to either become a Sage or learn to properly channel chakra for attack enhancement before he could try using the other three in a battle simulation.
Cutting his training short, and showing up a good hour before Kakashi was scheduled to arrive, Naruto made it to the bridge, and sat down on the railing next to where Sakura was standing.
"You know, I'm starting to think that his lateness is a test." Naruto said.
"What kind of test?" Sakura asked. Sasuke was silent, but Naruto could tell by the slight incline of his head that he was interested too.
"You know, to see if we'd actually make use of the time he's giving us, or if we'd just sit here looking stupid." Naruto answered. "Especially considering all the other squads I've talked to have said that they start at the same time that we do, only with team training, and exercises. Then after lunch, they do missions. Given that Kakashi-sensei doesn't show up until eleven, then we train for maybe an hour, and break for lunch, maybe he expects us to use our time more wisely." Again, Sakura and Sasuke were shocked by the level of intelligence shown by the class idiot.
"Well, what are we supposed to do?" Sakura asked. "Sensei hasn't given us anything to work on."
"Well, Hinata's team is doing this really cool exercise called tree climbing." Naruto said. "Kurenai-sensei showed me how to do it. What you have to do-"
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When Kakashi finally showed up- ten minutes later than normal to try and arrive after his student- and saw them working tree climbing, he gave an eyesmile. Finally they got the hint that they should have been using their time more efficiently. Perching himself in the tree Sakura was working on, Kakashi snapped his beloved book open, and began to read.
Kakashi was content to let his little Genin keep going, and take a late lunch- as it would give him more time with his precious- but alas, things weren't in his favor. A mere ten minutes after they normally broke for lunch, things took a sour turn.
"How'd you get so good at this?" Sasuke growled.
"Remember that day I told you Kurenai-sensei put me in timeout for making Hinata faint?" Naruto asked. "That's when I learned it."
"You mean that you've been holding out on us this entire time?" Sasuke spat, highly annoyed that the Dobe had mastered a skill that he hadn't. Sakura gave a slight glare as well when Naruto just shrugged.
"You didn't ask." The reply, while true, wasn't exactly fair, considering they hadn't even known about it. Sasuke glared hard at Naruto. He'd known that the Dobe was going to hold him back, but that he'd been doing it intentionally was unforgivable.
"All right, let's break for lunch." Kakashi said, appearing in a swirl of leaves. He'd sensed he impending squabble that was about to occur, and decided to head it off this time.
"Geez, you're even later than normal." Sakura grumbled.
"Well, when I arrived and saw my cute little Genin working so hard, I didn't want to disturb you." Sakura blushed, Sasuke glared, and Naruto raised an eyebrow. Lunch was a quick, quiet affair, and soon the group was ready to restart the day.
"Now, we're going to skip the mission room today." Kakashi said. "Since you all finally decided to act like shinobi, I figure I'd teach you all something that would complement your individual styles. Any one thing that you can think of, if I'm capable of teaching you how, then I will." Naruto grinned, he knew exactly what he was going to ask about. "Now, while I'm working with each of you individually, the other two will spar. So, whose first." Sasuke looked about to claim the first spot, but Naruto elbowed him in the side.
"Ladies, first, teme." Naruto said. "That means Sakura, unless there's something you're trying to hide from us." Sasuke's glare told him exactly what the boy thought of Naruto's insinuations.
"Tch, whatever." Kakashi smiled beneath his mask.
"Okay, Sakura, come with me; Naruto and Sasuke, light contact sparring." The two boys looked at each other, and frowned.
"Bah, it's no fun if we can't beat each other senseless." Sasuke, as much as he'd never admit it, couldn't help but agree. Beating each other until they couldn't stand was fun in its own way...well, when he had the upperhand, anyway. The Dobe could hit pretty damn hard when he wanted to.
Still, orders were orders. A silent agreement passed through the boys though. Next time they were allowed full contact, they were both going to the hospital to make up for it. Dropping into the Academy stance, for that was the only one that allowed them to take it easy on each other, they both charged.
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Twenty minutes later, Kakashi ended the spar. Both male Genin, highly bored with it after the first two minutes, were just going through the motions, and didn't look to even be trying.
"I guess I came back just in time." Kakashi said. "Alright, Naruto, come with me."
After leading him away from the other two, who were sparring- more like Sakura was attacking gently in order to not hurt her crush (as if she really could), and Sasuke was just practicing dodging- Kakashi turned to Naruto.
"Okay, Naruto, pick your poison." Kakashi said, grinning behind his mask, just knowing that Naruto would want something flashy and overpowered. He was sorely disappointed, well not really, but a little.
"I want to learn the Shunshin." Naruto replied. "I know it's supposed to be for upper level nin, but you said any jutsu. I could have picked something you don't know like the Rasengan, just to mess with you."
"That you could have." Kakashi said, deciding not to mention that he did know the jutsu; never knowing that Naruto knew he knew the jutsu. "Alright, here are the seals-"
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As Kakashi and Naruto rejoined his other teammates, the Jounin couldn't help but marvel at his sensei's son. It was like the harder a techniqe was, the easier it was for him to learn it. While he was utterly horrible at performing simple jutsu meant for kids his own age, give him a technique meant for shinobi Chuunin level or above, and he was able to properly use it at least once within a short amount of time- even if he did ridiculously overpower it. Had they still been around, Naruto would have been the ultimate anti-Sharingan shinobi, especially considering the Sharingan's weakness, and the majority of the clan's habit of not taking time to actually learn the jutsu they copied before trying to use it.
"Naruto and Sakura, spar a bit while I work with Sasuke." Naruto rolled his eyes at the girl's smirk as their sensei escorted Sasuke away. Well, he said he was going to break her out of her delusional fangirl phase, now was as good a time as any to start. With a cocky gesture, Naruto signalled for Sakura to make the first move.
"Ladies first." He said.
Sakura charged Naruto with her fist cocked back, expecting Naruto's usual shocked expression just before she clocked him, or he dodged. Rapidly closing the distance, Sakura punched, but found herself startled when Naruto blocked her attack, and punched her in the stomach...hard. Not giving her a chance to recover, Naruto kneed her in the chin, snapping her head back, and finished with a strong left that sent her face first to the ground with a split lip. Sakura looked up in horror, and eyes filled with tears accused.
"You hit me."
"Well yeah, it's a spar, you're supposed to." He didn't see why she was so surprised. Hadn't she seen what he'd done against their sensei the first day, or even noticed how easy it was for him to keep up with Sasuke, yet he always seemed to struggle against her.
"B-but you never could before." Naruto almost groaned at her statement. Surely she didn't think she was that good, did she?
"Before I was so infatuated with you that I'd let you beat on me, so that you thought you were doing something. With that illusion removed, I don't feel a need to do so. As a matter of fact, I should apologize to you, because I was actually hurting your development as a ninja. Now, you can either concede defeat, or get back up, and we keep going." Sakura glared, not believing that Naruto was better than her.
What followed was a rather eye opening beating for Sakura, one filled with numerous cuts, massive future bruises, and a destroyed pride.
Over with Sasuke and Kakashi, the two had been stunned into immobility when Naruto had actually attacked Sakura. The only reason he hadn't told the two light contact, was because he knew Sakura's weak physical disposition couldn't really hurt Naruto, and Naruto had never once tried to actually fight her in spars before. As the one-sided fight continued, even Sasuke was starting to feel sorry for the girl. He winced as Naruto's knee collided with Sakura's back, causing her to cry out in pain.
"Shouldn't you, you know, stop this?"
"No, it's a good lesson for Sakura." Kakashi said. "She's finally getting a taste of what can happen in the field, thankfully from a friendly source."
Back with the two sparring Genin, Sakura could be found laying on the ground in the fetal position, clutchin her stomach painfully, with tears rolling down her cheeks.
"Now, Sakura, I'm going to give you a bit of advice that I want you to seriously consider. If you're serious about being a ninja, then this prissy, girly thing you've got going has got to stop. The pampering, the diets, the spending more time on your hair and nails than you do your training, the not wanting to get messy, sweaty, or dirty, it has got to change. All of that crap you're buying into is a civilian luxury that a real kunoichi can't afford to waste time on. Just so you know, I will be talking to Kakashi-sensei about this. Either get your act together, or turn your headband in, and give up; this way we'll have enough time to replace you with a serious kunoichi before we start taking more serious missions."
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Another week and some passed, the three Genin finally making some significant progress with the new skill they'd learned from Kakashi- well except for Naruto, who had majorly cheated with Kage Bunshin once he felt he had the jutsu right. Just like nearly every other practice, things went well until Naruto did something new that set the last Uchiha off. This time it was Naruto using a Shunshin against Sasuke to close the distance faster than Sasuke was ready for, before punching him in the stomach. Once again, things devolved from there into an argument, that always had the same ending. Naruto would insult the Uchiha clan in some form or another, and Sasuke would reply the same way everytime...
"You're just jealous of my Sharingan." Kakashi sighed at the same predictable retort, knowing that it wasn't true. After awhile, when he realized that nothing he said would matter, Naruto just started to ignore his teammate at this point, and they were able to continue the day.
Naruto gawked at the boy, before shaking his head in disbelief. And they really call this guy a genius. He then got a very interesting idea.
"First of all, you don't have it yet, and there's a chance that you may not ever activate it." Naruto said, startling Kakashi with his reply. Sasuke glared at his teammate, knowing that it was true. "Second, why would I be jealous of the Sharingan, when I've got a bloodline too." Naruto boasted. Yep, that definitely got his attention.
"Naruto, I knew both your parents, you don't have a bloodline." Kakashi said.
"Yes I do, on my mother's side." Naruto said. "It's the...uh...um..." Naruto looks up. "Help me out here." Less than a second later, Naruto felt a searing pain in his eyes that caused him to growl in pain, and shut his rapidly tearing eyes.
"Naruto?" Kakashi asked. Naruto finally opened his eyes, and began blinking away the moisture that had formed there. Shaking his head to alleviate the pain, and giving himself time to recall the new information, Naruto smirked at what he found.
"My bloodline doesn't have a name, as the Uzumaki Clan weren't so prideful about it like the Hyuuga and Uchiha that it had to have a spectacular name." Sasuke just knew that was a slight at his family, and gave Naruto patented Uchiha glare number 34. "It grants the user impeccable natural vision equal to, possibly greater than even the Byakugan and Sharingan. They had unparalleled night vision, and can see just as well in the dark as in the daytime. With a bit of concentration, and maybe a small amount of chakra for the lower level, an Uzumaki could see up to almost 2 kms clearly. Not only that, but it gave them a very strong ability to notice even the minutest of details, making them vertually immune to most normal Genjutsu; the Kurama clan is a notable exception, as well as certain Sharingan based Genjutsu. This attention to detail makes it very difficult for them to be tricked by switching, replacing, and transformation jutsu too. It's also what made the Uzumaki Clan so good with Fuinjutsu."
"I've never heard of an Uzumaki Clan in Konoha." Sasuke taunted.
"That's because they weren't a clan of Konoha." Naruto answered. "They were from Whirlpool Country. There have only been three Uzumaki to live here; the Shodai's wife Mito, my mother, and me. I'm the only one to ever be born here though." Kakashi, of course, already knew all of this, though he did wonder how Naruto found out. He was however concerned with something else.
"Naruto, who were you talking to?" Kakashi asked. "More importantly, how did you get that bloodline?"
"I was talking to a friend beyond the fourth wall, don't worry about it Kakashi-sensei." Naruto explained. "As for the bloodline, I got it from a really big plothole." Deciding to ignore it for now, and talk to the Hokage about it later, Kakashi gave his team its next assignment.
"Right, well, today I've got a special mission for you." Kakashi said, a sinister grin on his face. "I've finally been able to reserve the Capture Tora Mission for you." All three Genin paled. They'd heard horror stories from Team 8 (who'd actually done the mission three times to date), and Naruto also remembered the numerous times he'd done the mission, both before and afterj his training with Jiraiya. The sad thing is, it never got easier, not even for Chuunin or Jounin level ninja.
For Naruto, this also marked another thing he'd been both anticipating and dreading...the mission to Wave. This time, he ws determined to save a certain pair, at the very least Haku. First things first, though, dealing with that evil demon cat Tora. Still, with all of the plans running through his head, he couldn't help the ominous feeling in the back of his mind. If only he could see NB's face at that moment, he'd know at the very least why he had that sudden bout of paranoia.
"Fine, I'll meet you in Jiji's office, I've got some things to set up first." Before Shunshining away in purple flames(1), Naruto added. "See ya." And then he was gone.
"Okay, now that was a nice exit." Kakashi muttered. "I'll have to see if he'll teach me that."
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1. Every time he Shunshin's it will be something different. Feel free to contribute ideas.
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And there you have chapter 2. Tora and Wave are up next, hope you have a strong enough stomach, or at least a twisted enough sense of humor, for the beginning.
Next chapter: Demon Meetings and Ghastly Greetings.