Winged Cupid Painted Blind Chapter 19 - Love is a Smoke Raised with the Fume of Sighs
"Well," Nat gave a nervous laugh, "Shall we go? They're probably waiting on us," he knew that both boys were in quit the predicament, all it would take was for Marie to open her mouth once and most of the school would turn on them both.
Edd wraps his trench coat around himself and meekly speaks, "Let's get this over with," and Kevin extends his arm confidently for Edd to take hold of. Leading the boy out the door and across the street to where the other group was waiting for them, most of them already in the vehicle.
As they enter the parking lot, "Hey D," Ed calls out and starts to run toward them, Double D's heart begins to race really fast and his grip on Kevin's arm tightens. His mind raced with thoughts, wondering if the boy was coming over to ask why they were in the stale together, or if Marie had already let it slip on what she had seen. The three of them stopped in their tracks as Ed joined them, "We're going to the Denny's down the road, so just follow us there," this statement was directed more toward Nat. Falling in line beside Double D they continued toward the car, "So, what the hell is Marie's problem all of the sudden?"
Edd stammered for a second and Kevin took responsibility and replied, "Nat was hitting on her, using some sexual innuendo about Riffraff and Magenta."
Nat gave him a side glancing look that could kill but played along, "Yeah, my bad, sometimes my mouth just spits things out before my brain can say stop."
"So she said no and you're respecting her wishes," Nat nods, "Then give her time, she'll cool down," they reached the mini-van and May climbs into the backseat leaving the side door open for him. Ed leans a little closer to Double D and softly says, "You two dating on the other hand might be tougher for her to get over," and he walks off casually leaving the three of them standing there in mild shock.
"Alrighty then," Nat says and walks off to his car climbing into the driver's seat.
Edd and Kevin climb into the back seat of the car and the red head feels eyes upon him, looking out the window he sees Marie looking at them from her seat in the mini-van. Kevin reaches over and takes Edd's hand, intertwining their fingers together, Edd looks in Kevin's direction as he does this and sees him looking at Marie. With a pleading look in his eyes Edd mouths the word please to her hoping for some sympathy from her, and as the vehicle she was in started to roll backward he thought he saw her expression soften.
The van pulls away and Nat starts to back his vehicle up, Kevin leans over and kisses Edd on the temple, "It will be alright."
"I hope so," Edd squeezed Kevin's hand slightly and the jock could tell he was scared, his hand was trembling.
Throwing the car into drive, "That Ed's a sharp one," Nat added as the car moved forward
"That he is," Edd was a little relieved that his friend was taking the discovery as well as he was, people sometimes surprise you. In the back of his mind he knew that Ed would always support him, it was just getting to that point of finding out that scared the shit out of him. Kevin comforted him as best he could by wrapping his arm around Edd's shoulder, while he admitted to himself that his own heart was racing, in the back of his mind scenes were playing out on how this would go down and the what if's. But the vast majority of his mind and his heart were in total agreement, Edd was finally his boyfriend and he planned on keeping it that way, fuck the rest of them if they don't like it.
They pulled into the Denny's parking lot ten minutes later and both groups filled into the restaurant, being seated at two booths that were back to back. Marie tried her best to squirm her way into sitting at the same booth with her sister and Ed's parents but Nat intercepted her before she could. "Uh-uh little missy," he guided her to sit in the seat farthest from the others in the next booth, "Let the happy couple sit together." The seating arrangements were as follows going from outside to inside, Nat and Marie on one bench joined by Kevin and Edd to fill one booth, then Ed and May sitting behind them joined by his parents to fill that booth.
An uncomfortable silence fell over the four of them as they looked over their menu's that were given to them by their blonde waiter. Behind them they could hear Ed and May giggling and talking amongst themselves and with his parents, a few comments about the movie and the group's costumes coming up here and there. "Say something Marie," Edd spoke quietly, his nerves were on edge from the silence between them, for once he wanted her to hit on him, for at least then he would know that things were normal between them.
"What do you want me to say, hmm," she was noticeable upset and failing miserable at keeping it from showing in her voice, "That I am alright with all this, alright with the fact that someone that I have loved has spurned me for another man?"
That part was a little louder then Edd was comfortable with, although the volume was still low and no higher than normal, his fears were just playing with him at this moment. Kevin spoke low but stern, "Look Marie, he can't help that he's not attracted to girls, it's nothing personal."
She turned her full attention to Kevin, and if looks could kill he would have been knocking upon heavens door."And what about you Mr. Casanova, how long have you been packing the fudge," The hurt she was feeling was driving her mouth to say things that she really didn't want to, she knew you couldn't choose who you loved or who you were attracted to. "I wonder what everyone is going to think about Kevin Fucking Barr once they learn he bats for the other team," she knew she needed to stop, for hurting Edd no matter the reasons was not something she wanted to do.
Nat had had enough of this, "Ok go tell everyone, then what, you know all you will be doing is giving them ammo to use against Edd, is that something you want to do?"
She looked downtrodden at that thought, for it clicked that to out Kevin would be to out Edd and that would just invite more people to treat him bad, she shakes her head no. "Marie Edd's your friend, isn't that right babe?"
"Yes," Edd said sadly, he never wanted to hurt her, he just didn't know how to get the point across that he would never be interested in her without telling her he was gay.
"And if you care about him as much as you say you do then obviously you have to think of Edd as a friend right," She nods her head to what Kevin was saying never really making eye contact with him. "Good, for love without the aspects of friendship in it is nothing but obsession, and if that's the case then Edd would be nothing more than an object to be possessed by you, that's not how you feel is it Marie?" She shakes her head no, "Cool, then be his friend and respect his feelings and don't try and hurt him with all this talk about outing him."
She looked almost on the edge of tears, "But if you weren't around I might have…"
"No Marie you wouldn't," she looks at Edd who had spoken up finally to tell her how it is, "I'm gay ok, so even if I wasn't with Kevin I still wouldn't be attracted to you. I'm your friend Marie and I never wanted to hurt you, but I can't force myself to love someone no more than you can."
The waiter had returned and was taking the orders for the other table at the moment, "What about his friends, they're sure to notice?"
"Hey lumpy," Kevin calls and both Ed and May peek their heads over the partition, and he continues a little lower in volume, "What do you think about us dating?"
May was the first to respond, "I think it's great, D needs a little love in his life," she smiled and ruffled Edd's hair a little.
Marie was shocked, her sister knew about it before her and didn't tell her, "May, how long have you known?"
To which Ed replied, "We've been taking bets on when he would tell us for awhile now," Ed smiles broadly, "And I think it's awesome, Kevin's going to be good for him," he claps Kevin on the side of his arm and they both turn back around as his mother called out to them to give the waiter their order.
"See their cool with it, I know Nat's cool with it," Kevin motions to their friend.
"It's the thing dreams are made of," and he makes an obscene motion with his hand as though he was masturbating, which earned him a kick from Kevin under the table and a irritated look.
Softening his face once again he turns back to Marie and continues, "And we're cool with being in this relationship," he motions between himself and Edd, "The only person who seems to have an issue right now is you."
"Please Marie," Edd said reaching his hand out to the girl, "You're my friend and I don't want that to change, so could you accept this part of me and be content with being my friend." He meant every word of it, the only issue he has ever had with the girl was her constant flirting, if she could accept who he was and keep to those boundaries their friendship could develop into something great.
She thought it through carefully, this would explain a great many things for her, why he never reciprocated her feelings, why he never wanted to do anything sexual with her though she made it quite clear she would if he wanted to. It would also lift a burden from her shoulders as well, for she agonized over it wondering why she was never good enough for him, was she not smart enough, pretty enough or thin enough. Everything she tried to make herself more appealing to him never seemed to work and with this new information it all started to make sense, "I would like that, but I'm going to need some time," she reaches over and takes his hand timidly.
"Thank you Marie," he squeezes her hand gently, and at that time the waiter comes over to their table and starts taking Nat's order, "I am sorry Marie, I never meant to hurt you, I swear."
"I know Edd," she returns the affectionate squeeze, "I'm sorry for hurting you with what I said as well, I was just…"
"I know, it's alright," he releases her hand and leans back into his seat, giving the waiter his order when called upon.
Once she gave her order and the waiter had left them to turn in the slips Kevin asks, "So we cool then Marie?"
She let out a sigh, "It hurts but I'll respect your relationship with Edd, so yes Kevin we're cool,"
"Cool," and the subject was dropped, only time would ultimately tell if Marie was going to keep good on her word or not and they would have to cross that bridge when and if they got there. The conversation from that point on was light between the three boys trying to return to some form of normality and leave the drama behind them, Marie would join in on occasion but mainly sat there working out her thoughts on the subject. While they waited for their food Kevin had placed his arm on the table in front of him so his forearm ran along the edge and his hand was dipped out of sight. The fingers of that hand and the fingers of Edd's hand were gingerly brushing against each other under the table, seeking some discreet affectionate contact with each other while trying not to make Marie feel awkward.
By the time the food had arrived Marie was feeling better, the pain was still fresh and there but she had made a choice that she needed to give up on Edd, and just maybe, by letting go she could find her own happiness. And as she watched Kevin feed Edd a bite of his steak smothered in egg yolk she came to accept that they did in fact look cute together. And just maybe Big Ed was right, that Kevin was in fact going to be good for the boy, for she could see that he was bringing him out of his shell little by little, plus when Edd laughed she could tell that it was genuine and that he was happy.