This chapter officially marks the beginning of my month long hiatus from posting chapters. Sense and Flexibility will return on April 5th 2012. Thank you all for your enormous support for my much needed break, I really appreciate it. I know you won't even miss me as we'll all be too busy playing Mass Effect 3 and i'll be going to school and all sorts of stuff!
Keep in mind I will still be on my blog, facebook, and twitter, just hanging around so feel free to contact me anytime for chats! Visit my profile page for the numerous ways to contact me! ^_^
Lovelovelove
Roarkshop
Teryk knew better than to offer to help Garrus on his murder-quest, and he most certainly knew better than to try and stop him. Strapping his son's rifle onto his back, Teryk sprinted back to the Normandy, trying to navigate his way back the way he came to avoid running into unnecessary trouble. When he came through the airlock Solana was pacing with her arms crossed.
"There you are," she said with a relieved exhale. "When the drell brought Shepard down and you two didn't follow I thought something might have happened."
"Shouldn't you be helping Shepard?"
"Lynn and the Salarian have it under control. Wait, where's Garrus?"
"He went back," Teryk said with an exhale.
"What?" the pilot said, swiveling around in his chair. "Why in the hell would he do that? We need to split before the Shadow Broker sends a god damn welcoming committee or something."
"He's gone back for Gideon, the leader."
"Oh, Gideon's still alive?" Joker asked, taking his hat off and rubbing the top of his head. "Well, alright, that makes sense. I guess I'll wait then."
"Did you even attempt to bring him back with you?" Solana asked, sternly tapping her foot.
"You should know better, Solana," Teryk said as he turned to head down to the Med Bay. "It's like we've had a wild animal on board, caged in a room too small to stand up in. Do you really think there was any stopping him? As soon as he saw Shepard, so wounded and hurt, the dam broke. There's nothing holding him back now, and I know better than to get in his way."
"Well what do we do?" Solana asked as they loaded onto the elevator.
"He's going to become completely unhinged, Sol. Unless we can wake up the one who holds the reigns to the horse."
Garrus held it together just long enough to understand Tali's instructions on how to get to the Engineering Hangar where Gideon was hiding. He heard the directions, heard her tell him there were 10 other men down there, and heard her start trying to stop him, but his brain acknowledged that it wasn't critical information and he very soon stopped listening. Once Thane had confirmed that Shepard was on board the Normandy and safe, he steadily let his rage run through him. There was no reason to control it, after all. The mission, the one thing occupying his mind enough to keep the blood haze at bay, was complete. And in its place was only pure, unadulterated, hate.
Maybe if they had gotten here sooner and Garrus hadn't received a life altering epiphany, Shepard's safety would be enough to satisfy him. But now that he knew, now that he understood just what she was to him, he couldn't just walk away. He couldn't leave the job unfinished knowing full well he may never get another chance. No, Garrus was on the same ship as the only person in the universe who had ever made Shepard truly suffer, and there was no way they both got off this ship alive.
As he continued down the long corridor his thoughts became less and less coherent. They ceased to be ideas and were replaced by images, flashes of scenes that were forever burned into his memory; A ten-year-old girl, bloodied and restrained, kicking and screaming. That same girl now a woman, bound to an electrocution chair, her face bruised and bleeding, her throat tense with the pain. Then she was in his arms, shivering, fighting the shock, covered in blood, bones broken, throat and shoulders singed from where she had been tortured.
Suffice it to say that by the time Garrus found Gideon and his men, he had ceased to be rational.
Garrus roared as he grabbed the first human he came in contact with by the helmet and spun his head around making a satisfying crack before he fell to the ground in a heap. Garrus heard garbled cries and gunshots in the distance, made quiet by the sound of his heart pounding in his ears. He felt a dull thud on his leg, then one on his chest, but ignored them as he reached through a merc's shields and sank his bare talons into his jugular and quickly detached it from his body. The human gurgled and sank to the floor.
Garrus felt a sharp pain in his side and it did nothing but fuel him further as he grabbed the nearest human by the shoulder, turned him around, and sank his heel into the small of his back. He heard the familiar snapping sound of a spinal cord severing and turned his attention to the remaining threats. Another merc, who had gotten too close, was pulled into Garrus' chest by an arm around his throat. Garrus pressed the merc's back against him and manipulated the human's hand that had a gun in it to shoot his two comrades across the room before making him press the barrel against his own head.
Blam.
They might as well have been children with pop guns considering the rate at which Garrus mowed them down.
Killing the ten mercs must have sated his rage somewhat considering he had the presence of mind to recognize that only Gideon was left. The human was on the ground, fumbling around with a clip, desperately trying to reload his pistol.
Garrus, growling, slowly approached Gideon and crouched onto the balls of his feet. The human was pretty obviously terrified since he froze completely and let Garrus, very gently, remove the gun and clip from his hands. Without taking his eyes off the cowering human, Garrus loaded the pistol with the clip and put a round through Gideon's leg.
The pained cry that came from Gideon's throat satisfied a very primal part of Garrus. He rolled his neck out and tried to calm down a little. If he didn't get a handle on his rage, Gideon would die much too fast.
"Gideon," Garrus rumbled, staring down at him.
"Who- Who are you?" the human wailed, holding his bullet wound.
"What is it you humans call it?" Garrus said, tilting his head to the side. "The Grim Reaper?"
"Hey, man. I don't know where she is alright? Just leave me alone."
"Oh, I already found her. I found her covered in singe marks where you had electrocuted her."
Blam. Garrus put a bullet through Gideon's other leg.
"I found her full of bullet holes where your people had shot her."
Blam. A round through his stomach.
"I found her amidst a pile of corpses, on the brink of death from the torture she had endured."
Blam. A round through his right shoulder.
Each shot made Gideon scream out in agony, and Garrus had to bite down his smile.
"Wh-why," the human whined, coughing blood. "If you've…ung… already found her… why are you doing this?"
"Because I know," Garrus said, grabbing Gideon by the throat and standing, lifting the flailing merc into the air. "I know everything, Gideon. I know about Jane. I know about Deelia. I know it all."
"Oh, god. You- you're the brother aren't you? The hostage's brother."
"It would appear," Garrus growled through clenched teeth. "That you have fucked with the wrong turian's human." He punctuated the sentence by slamming Gideon against the wall, making him cry out in pain again.
"Please," he croaked out, clutching at Garrus' hand around his throat. "I'll never go near her again just… Just let me go."
"After what you've done you expect to be able to just walk away?" Garrus lifted him and slammed him into the wall again, the rage slowly building back up. "You think I'd let you live after how you've hurt her?" Garrus threw his other hand, still holding the pistol, into Gideon's face exactly how he had done it to Shepard only hours ago. "No, Gideon, this is where you die. I will not allow you to hurt her again."
"Jane," Gideon coughed out. "Jane wouldn't want you to do this."
Garrus let the gun fall out of his hands and roared a vicious, savage sound, as he moved his hands to grip Gideon by the shirt. He slammed the human into the wall so hard he heard his skull crack against the wall.
"Don't you call her that," he snarled. "Don't you talk about her like you know her."
The human tried to gurgle something else out but Shepard's voice brought Garrus out of his blood haze.
"….Garrus…" she said.
"No, Shepard," said Teryk in Garrus' earpiece. "No, it's Teryk."
"Where is he," she said. "Where's Garrus?"
"He went back for Gideon, Jane," Solana said.
"He did WHAT?" She roared.
Garrus lowered Gideon to the ground so he could concentrate on listening rather than holding the human up. There was a scuffle in the background.
"Jane," Chakwas said. "What on Earth are you doing, girl? Lie back down before you further injure yourself!"
"Get off me, god damn it, I'm going after him."
"Commander!" Mordin shouted in the background. "Need to stop bleeding! Serious ramifications if-"
"Shut up! Get him back here!" Shepard screamed. "Joker!"
"Shepard?" Joker said over the speakers.
"Patch me to Garrus' comm. Right this god damn second!"
"Already done, Shepard."
"Hey Ugly," she shouted. "I am refusing all medical treatment until I see your stupid face! If you let me die in this florescent hell hole I will use your leathery hide to reupholster my god damn couch!" He could hear her panting and coughing after she had finished shouting.
"Shit," Garrus said to himself, tightening his grip on Gideon's shirt. "Sorry human, it looks like I might have to cut our date short."
He threw Gideon against the stacks of large metal drums stored against the opposite wall. The need to get back to Shepard suddenly became much more important than his rage, and he felt the anger slowly easing out of his chest. Still, he fired another round into each of Gideon's legs. You know, for good measure.
"Jesus Christ!" Gideon cried.
Garrus approached and fired the butt of the pistol into one of the large drums against the wall. Fuel immediately started spilling down onto the floor, surrounding Gideon. Garrus, making sure to keep clear of the liquid, removed his father's lighter from his pocket and thumbed it over in his hand.
"No," Gideon cried, holding a hand up. "Jesus, don't! Please! You don't have to do this!"
"Yes I do," Garrus said after a deep breath, his rational mind coming back to him. "You represent something, Gideon, something that needs to end."
Gideon wailed and begged as he tried to crawl his way out of the fuel.
"Take comfort in that you aren't dying alone, Gideon," Garrus said, flicking his thumb and igniting the lighters flame. "Jane Doe dies with you."
Garrus tossed the lighter across the room and it spun before landing sideways in the puddle of fuel. The ground came alight immediately and Gideon watched as it crawled, spreading across the liquid to his feet, consuming all it came in contact with. As Garrus turned to sprint down the halls of the Augustine, he listened to Gideon scream, terror and pain echoing through the hollow space.
He smiled.
As he charged through the airlock, panting, Joker turned to acknowledge him.
"You're in so much trouble, dude," Joker chided.
"No time, dude," Garrus said. "I think the Augustine's going to explode."
"The who's going to what?"
"Yeah I may have started a fire in the Engine Room, so unless you want to see whatever that turns into, I'd recommend jumping us the hell out of here."
"What the shit!" Joker said as he panicked, turning back to the controls. "EDI! Get us the shit out of shit!"
"Initiating FTL drives," EDI cooed.
Garrus stumbled as the ship took off, but quickly regained his footing and made his way downstairs only to find Shepard standing in a puddle of her own blood in a corner of the Med Bay, holding a gun on everyone. They all had their hands up like hostages and sighed with relief when they saw Garrus come in.
"What the…" Garrus said as he stepped in. "Who the hell gave you a gun?"
"That's my gun," Teryk said with his hands up defensively. "She's faster than she looks."
"Well I'm here now," he said, turning to her. "Will you lie back down now, you stubborn human?"
She didn't say anything, just let the gun fall to her side and held her other hand out to him weakly.
He exhaled a slow breath as he approached and took her hand in his, intending to pick her back up and put her back on the bed. Before he even saw her move, however, her other hand had dropped the gun and firmly gripped him by the throat. The tips of her fingers dug into his jugular and made him choke on his own breath.
"If you ever," she said, glaring up at him. "Go onto an enemy ship without me on your six again, I will calibrate, your face with my FISTS! Do you understand me, Vakarian?"
"Yes, Ma'am," he choked out.
Immediately her grip loosened and she slid her hand to the side of his throat, letting her head fall onto his armored chest, exhausted. He coughed and inhaled.
"Don't," she said softly. "Don't do that again."
"I won't, Shepard," he said as he lifted her into his arms, and put her back into the bed before rubbing his throat.
"Sedate her," he heard Chakwas whisper to Solana, who obliged immediately.
It was only moments before Shepard drifted back into unconsciousness, and Garrus sighed.
"Well?" Teryk asked, crossing his arms, taking note of the amount of blood Garrus was covered in. "Did you get him?"
"I came back, didn't I?"
Garrus sat besides Shepard's bed through the night, listening to the sound of her heart, the mellow hum of the machinery monitoring her vital signs, her shallow breath.
He felt so helpless.
He thought about how he had ignored the advances of the girl on Omega, how his body had reacted to Shepard but no one else. He thought about how Thane had been irritating him, how his dad had been trying to tell him. He thought about how his instincts had kicked in when he was wounded in the Med Bay, his predator instinct to protect her overtaking his instinct to survive. He thought back to sparring with her on the SR1, how he had almost lost control. Spirits, how far back did it go?
Garrus put his face in his hands as he sat in the dark Med Bay. He should have seen it. He should have recognized that it was happening and stopped it before it got to this point. What was he going to do now? Now that he was in love with his best friend who had told him, on several occasions, that their friendship was too important to take a chance? Spirits, he was an idiot.
Damn his dad, why did he have to push it? If he hadn't tried to make him realize it, maybe he never would have. Maybe Shepard and he could have just gone on as normal until they died in the Omega Four.
That was unlikely. Regardless of what his dad had said beforehand it had nothing to do with the overwhelming feeling inside him when he found her on the Augustine; When he saw her doused in the blood of her enemies, when he saw the power in her face.
The memory made his heart thrum in his chest.
He was definitely in trouble.
Whatever the case, he knew now. And now that he realized just how much of his world she possessed it would be all the more struggle to keep it together. Could he continue on as usual? What happens when Thane realizes how Shepard feels about him? What happens when they finally confront each other? The thought made his blood boil. Now that he realized just how important she was to him, the thought of Thane, or any other man, getting that close to her…
Garrus exhaled a frustrated breath as he leaned back into the chair, studying the details of Shepard's face. The realization crept up on him that none of that mattered anymore. He had her back now, she was safe, she was alive, and he was going to make sure nothing like the past two days ever happened again. He resolved to stay by her side, her number two, for as long as she would have him there, because that's what was important, both to him and to her. He had spent years earning a place in her heart and he damn sure wasn't about to forfeit that with a ridiculous confession about something that he could just as easily keep to himself.
As Garrus sat there watching her, the strain of the past two days, the exhaustion, finally hit him, and he started drifting.
The beat of her heart and the sound of her breath was the music to which he fell asleep.
Awareness came back to Garrus slowly. He didn't know how much time had passed, but he didn't feel like he had slept for long. Sleeping in the chair had made his neck stiff, so he rolled it out and opened his eyes, only to find he was looking at an empty bed.
"What the hell," he said as he snapped awake and stood. All the machines had been turned off and all the wires that had been connected to Shepard were abandoned on the bed. "EDI," Garrus said, more urgently then he had meant to. "Where the hell is Shepard?"
"The Commander is in the Cockpit."
"Stubborn human," he said to himself as he tromped toward the elevator. He shouldn't have been surprised. Why had he ever expected her to stay in the Med Bay when she could just as easily cause herself serious damage by leaving it, impetuous woman that she was.
The CIC was completely abandoned this early in the morning, but he saw the red of her hair at the end of the corridor as soon as the elevator doors opened. She was just standing there behind Joker's chair, staring out the windows.
Garrus made his way to her slowly, trying to figure out what he was going to say to her.
"Hey," was what he came up with.
"Hey," she said, turning her head only slightly to acknowledge him.
"You shouldn't be up, Shepard," he said.
"He's dead isn't he?" She turned to look at him over her shoulder, a sadness in her eyes. There was a bandage on the side of her forehead over her eyebrow, but the pain in her face was obvious. Garrus silently made note that her hands, still wrapped in bandages, were holding her stomach. "Gideon… He's dead."
The question made Garrus pause a few feet behind her, unsure of how to answer. He decided that, considering the depth of the subject matter, simple honesty would be the best approach.
"Yes," was all he said.
She sighed and Garrus saw her shiver as she turned back around to look out the windows.
"Did he beg?"
"Yes."
She laughed once, humorlessly.
"It's funny," she said softly. "I had always assumed Gideon had died back on Earth years ago. But, somewhere in my head, I guess I always knew he was out there. It's… it's like I could feel that he was thinking about me in the pit of my stomach." She looked down. "Why, Garrus? Why did you go back for him?"
"I had to," he said as he closed the gap between them. He took his spot, his rightful spot, at her side and looked down at her. "I made you that promise a long time ago, Shepard."
"I remember no such promise," she said without looking up at him.
"Well I never told you I made it," he said. "But that doesn't mean I didn't make it."
She laughed.
"You're upset."
"No," she said. "I'm not…"
He reached a hand over to her chin and lifted it with two fingers so that he saw the tear stains on her cheek. He responded only by exhaling through his nose.
"Seriously, I'm not," she said with a half-hearted smile.
"Yeah I can see that," he said sarcastically, releasing her chin.
"It's just…" she sighed and looked back out at the stars. "I feel like I've lost a knot in my stomach that I've had for over a decade. It's an odd feeling, to not have it haunting me anymore, like it was always supposed to be there and I shouldn't be allowed to just forget it all. But, I can finally let it go. Carmine, Gideon, Finch, The Reds…" She sighed and shook her head. "Deelia… All of it. It's over. Really over."
"Yeah," he lied, looking out the windows.
Garrus knew it wasn't over; he still had a score to settle with the Shadow Broker after all. Just because the main character had been killed was no reason to let the puppet master off the hook. No, he would take the fight to the Shadow Broker sooner or later; he would make sure of it. But he didn't need to tell Shepard that. He didn't want to say anything to interrupt the relief in her. The touch of her bandaged fingers on his elbow snapped him out of his thoughts, and he felt her slide them down the inside of his forearm to put her hand in his. He swallowed, and looked down at her.
"Thank you, Garrus," she whispered before looking up at him.
He didn't say anything for fear of saying something stupid. Instead, he replied with a single nod.
Shepard let her head fall onto his shoulder, and he turned to her so that she could rest it on his chest before wrapping her in his arms.
"I uh…" He cleared his throat. "You should really get back in the Med Bay and sleep."
"Just let me stay like this," she said, nuzzling his chest with her face. "Just for a while."
He exhaled and lifted a hand to stroke the back of her hair, letting her scent surround him.
"It's good to be home," she said.
"It's good to have you home," he replied.