Derek looked at him and nodded at him, "I love you too, Stiles, and don't want you to feel the way you felt today ever again. I love you and will always want you to be happy." he whispered not looking away from him.
"I know. Can I...can I bite your neck? I understand if you don't want but...It's nothing sexual I swear...I just want to...to mark you. You can...mark me after that if you...if you want so...can I?" Stiles whispered not looking at Derek.
Derek sighed quietly and tilted his head to the side, offering an unmarked patch of skin.
"Are you sure? You don't look like you want it. And I…if you don't want I...I wouldn't do it. I'll be...fine." Stiles whispered.
Derek rolled his eyes and tilted his head more, cupping the back of Stiles' head.
"Thank you." Stiles whispered against Derek' neck before he bit it hard enough to leave a mark.
Derek hissed, and tighten his grip on Stiles' neck.
Stiles kissed the mark gently. And bite at the other place on Derek' neck.
Derek sighed and relaxed his body completely.
Stiles grips Derek' hair tightly, making new mark on his neck.
Derek let out a quiet moan as Stiles abused his neck.
Stiles groaned and immediately pulled away from Derek. "Oh my God...I'm so sorry Derek...I...I..didn't mean to...I..I'm sorry I lost control...I...fuck..you're the wolf and you're in control and I'm just simple human and I...I'm sorry." Stiles said looking at him apologetically.
Derek sighed and pulled him close, "You aren't just a simple human." Derek growled and bit into his shoulder, sharply.
Stiles moaned quietly and gripped Derek' hair.
Derek kissed the mark and started nosing his neck quietly, not going any further.
Stiles sighed and just let Derek to do what he wants.
Derek pulled away and looked at him.
"What?" Stiles whispered not looking at him.
"I was going to ask you the same thing." Derek mumbled.
"Why?" Stiles asked still not looking at Derek.
"You're not looking at me." Derek answered quietly.
"And?" Stiles mumbled.
"That bothers me. Why aren't you looking at me?" Derek whispered.
"It's nothing...Why did you pulled away?" Stiles whispered.
"Because, eye contact is a lot more important than touching and all that. I'm not telling you to look at me, I'm just telling you that if you aren't even looking at me once, I'll stop whatever I'm doing."
"You will stop anyways." Stiles mumbled but looked at him. "Happy now?"
"What do you mean I will always stop?" Derek frowned
"That you'll stop anyway so..." Stiles whispered.
Derek looked at him for a moment before sighing. He leaned forward and kissed his neck gently.
Stiles tilted his head to the side a little.
He licked it and brought his hands up to Stiles' hip.
"Don't do that." Stiles whispered closing his eyes.
Derek closed his eyes, "Why?" he breathed, pulling his lips just inches from Stiles' skin.
"Because you'll pull away. Please just don't do that. It's hurt enough already. I can't...if you reject me I...please just don't do that to me." Stiles mumbled.
Derek frowned, "What if I don't pull away, or reject you, will you let me do this to you?"
"You said you don't want sex Derek. Don't do it when you don't want it." Stiles whispered.
Derek sighed, "But I want you." he mumbled, "Necking doesn't have to lead to sex."
"Ooh you still...I thought...I...okay. Do it." Stiles said looking at his lap.
Derek let out a frustrated noise, "No, don't tell me to do it if it's like a chore for you."
"Like a chore? I wanted to let me touch you...I needed you to let me do something. To know that after everything….after that fight. I was still useful. I was still capable of make you feel good. So don't you dare tell me that it's chore for me when I need your touch!" Stiles said.
"Don't measure your usefulness by wither or not you can make me feel good. You're more than that." Derek said, "I already told you you can still make me feel good, that there will never be a point where you won't make me feel good."
"I don't think you understand Derek. It's...I don't know it's just mean something to me...it's stupid I know but it's important. I know I can still make you feel good...I just have to...to prove it to you...to the wolf...to myself. Whatever we talked about this. You don't want it. So that's it. I'm telling you that if you want you can do...whatever you wanted to with my neck." Stiles whispered.
Derek sighed and he shifted around a bit, moving his hands away from Stiles, "Stiles, I want you to do that thing, the one you were talking about."
"I'm okay. You don't have to do it." Stiles whispered.
"I'm not doing anything but showing you I still want you." Derek said, baring his neck a bit.
"Don't do it. Don't do it when you don't want it. I...I know you want me...I guess. I...I'll be fine. I didn't told you the...things I said to make you feel bad or guilty or to make you say yes. I told you...just to know it." Stiles said.
Derek sighed and shook his head, "I want you to do it to me. I'm not doing it out of guilt or anything, just the need for you to see I want you and am willing to show you. I'm not saying yes because I feel obligated to say yes."
"Do you want it?" Stiles whispered, looking at Derek.
"Yes." Derek said looking back at him.
Stiles smiled a little at him and kissed his lips gently.
Derek kissed him back, softly, like he was made out of glass so he had to be careful.
Stiles climbed in his lap, straddled him and kiss him more passionately.
Derek leaned his head back, kissing him just slightly harder, bringing his hands up to his hips.
Stiles start to cover his whole face in gentle kisses.
Derek closed his eyes and let out a small sigh.
Stiles pulled away with tears in his eyes. "You don't want it." he whispered.
Derek frowned and looked up at him.
"I'm sorry." Stiles mumbled without looking at him.
Derek gripped his hips tighter, "Talk to me." he whispered.
"Talk about what? You told me that you want it, but you clearly aren't even enjoying it. I can't do it knowing you...don't want it...don't like it." Stiles whispered.
"Why do you think I wasn't enjoying it?" Derek asked quietly.
"I know you wasn't. You can't stop...sigh and...I know you don't like it so can you just drop it." Stiles whispered looking at his lap.
Derek sighed and leaned up to kiss his neck, "I want to enjoy it. So very badly, But...it's not the right time."
Stiles get off Derek and lay with his back to him.
Derek let out a low sigh and turned around to put his back to Stiles, laying down.
Stiles hide his face in the pillow, trying to stop his sobs.
Derek just laid there feeling his heart clench.
Stiles whole body was shaking, but he didn't dare to turn around to look at Derek or ask him to…just do something.