'Barely skim us?'

Really?

Wrong.

A single wall, the outermost wall of Carol-san's room, separates the two of us from a freezing natural mercenary. The blizzard howls at Ryoshi's home, throwing the torrents of wind and snow furiously at us all. Above me, the lights flicker, almost like the electrical system is wincing in fear of the storm's unmerciful wrath.

Carol-san glances upward cautiously, her hands hesitating at the second dresser drawer. "Oh yeah," she speculates, before continuing her hunt for some winter clothes destined for my temporary use, "This house is pretty old—been in the family for generations, y'know—and the lights don't always hold under thunderstorms. Like, a regular storm." She shakes her head and shuts the drawer, moving to the one below it.

"And I'd say this surpasses a regular storm. So prepare for a very long blackout or two."

I sigh, and peer over her shoulder.

"Find anything yet?"

"'Fraid not. Oh wait! Here's a scarf." She chucks a red strip of fabric over her shoulder. I catch it. Better than nothing, I guess. Carol-san moves to the last drawer and resumes rummaging.

"Not to worry. I know I've got something…" She insists. A few minutes later, she triumphantly yanks out a forest green hooded jacket.

"There you go. I guess that's all I've got." I slip it on.

"Hey, works for me. Thank you." I flash her a smile.

"Okay, goodnight Sweetheart." Carol-san yawns.

"You're going to sleep already?" The lights blink again. Carol-san sighs.

"Yeah. What can I say? This weather makes me uncomfortable. I feel like I'm going to be snowed inside forever, dumb as that is."

"I know the feeling," I admit. "Scary."

"Yeah. For more reasons than one, too. Imagine being trapped inside this place with Jared until the snow melts." We both shudder in mock horror, and then we crack up. I walk towards the door.

"See ya tomorrow."

"Bye Sweetheart."

The hallways are lonelier than usual, almost creepy. Lightning lights my way, my feel shuffling over the dusty hardwood floors. Whoever is responsible for cleaning in here is dropping the ball.

I'm relieved to reach my room, eager to sequester myself in the warm sheets and escape the cold, foreboding hall. I shut the door firmly behind me, and flick the light switch.

Only nothing happens. Great. I'm stuck inside a creepy house with a creepy storm outside and I'm alone in my dark bedroom that is being occasionally lit up by creepy flashes of lightning. I've been in better situations.

I frown into the abyss and dart out into the open space, jumping at the last second so that I land on my hard bed.

Only I don't land on the bed. I land on something that is large and warm and a person.

A panicked scream threatens to explode from my lungs, but before I can do that, a hand covers my mouth. I jerk and kick, trying to land any kind of self-defense move on this freak, but unfortunately I'm sitting on top of them, so I don't have enough space to do anything! Their arms are wrapped around me, restraining me. Oh no oh no this is it I'm going to get raped or killed I'm screwed screwed screwed!

"Shhhh, Ryoko-chan please, calm down! It's me!" I stop struggling, my huffing breath stifled by Ryoshi's hand.

"It's me," he repeats, as if I couldn't tell that by now. I relax, and yank his hand off my face, twisting off of his lap. I can almost see him in the cracked darkness, but not quite.

"You idiot!" I hiss. "Just what the hell do you think you're doing in here?!" In truth, I'm glad to see him, but I'm also super pissed off. C'mon, he scared me to death!

"Gah, I'm sorry! I just needed to see you and… I don't know, this is what I came up with!"

I sigh. "Okay, but next time try not to make me have a heart attack!" I snap. Silence follows. It sinks in, at least for me, that Ryoshi is here. This whole time, I've been trying to get him… here. With me. And now he is. And then, I feel something I didn't quite expect to.

I'm not really sure what this feeling is, just that there is a lot of it, and I want to punch Ryoshi, although there is a much stronger force that wants me to kiss him. I want to punch him because he left me. I acknowledge that it was not his fault, that my hurt resentment is stupid and also pathetic, but something small but unignorably obstinate inside me sulks all the same, and scowling, says, 'It was a promise, and he broke it. End of story.'

So I stare at him—well, really the idea of him, it's still too dark to see the real thing—and wait for this feeling to go away. But it won't. So I just keep waiting.

Ryoshi is quiet as well. He is waiting too, I think—although I don't get the feeling he's waiting on me. Finally, his voice echoes in the darkness.

"Ryoko," he begins. He stops. His voice is husky.

"Ryoko. You have no idea how sorry I am."

Silence. My heart throbs.

"That s-so?" I try to keep my voice even, in the same low, devil-may-care tone I always use. It breaks anyway.

"That's so."

Lightning blinds me for a minute, then flees as soon as it came. The wind whips around the house with a hushed sigh.

"I broke my promise to you. That's unforgivable. I just came to tell you… I don't expect forgiveness, because I hurt you, Ryoko. But I do want you to know how I feel. And I am so sorry."

My face starts to crumble. I'm so thankful that he can't see it.

"D-don't be stupid," I scoff, whipping my face off. "I… I didn't even… care, it doesn't matter…" I can't finish the lie. I curse myself, because I'm not strong enough to tell the truth, yet I'm not strong enough to lie anymore. I'm just stuck.

"Can I hug you?" Ryoshi asks suddenly, his voice shy, but manly at the same time. How is that possible?

I choke out a laugh. "What the crap, man. So random with that." I sigh.

"Knock yourself out, if you want."

Ryoshi seizes me, and I'm disgusted to find that I can't seem to control myself anymore once he does. I cry into his shirt, the same way I did when Umi had my voice, and I couldn't do anything, and Ryoshi was there for me. In that moment, the dam breaks, and I release my resentment. I allow myself to be held. Eventually I quit the crying, embarrassed enough for six lifetimes—but part of me is actually okay with it. Ryoshi's seen the softer side of me so many times, I'm fooling myself if I think this one makes any difference at this point. He already knows the real me.

"I forgive you," I mutter. "To be honest, none of this was your fault. You need to forgive yourself. Blame your mom." I laugh softly.

Ryoshi is so close, I can feel his smile. "Really?" he asks, like a kid who's been told that he just won a lifetime supply of candy. I nod. It becomes obvious to me then—Ryoshi is as scared as I am. He says he doesn't want forgiveness, which is probably true, but he does want me. He needs me to stay, just as badly as I need him to.

"I won't let you down again, Ryoko." His voice is cautious, like he's terrified I won't believe him.

He must really love me.

"You didn't the first time."