Chapter nine- July 31st

Chapter nine plot- While assisting on a particularly hard case we see Jo flash back to the moment her husband died.

Thank you all again for all of the love and support. Please enjoy this chapter. Sending you all lots of love and happiness!

Also, Just an important note. This chapter runs parallel to the previous chapter. The events are happening at the same time. This chapter begins just after Alex offers to babysit the kids.

"I was paged," Jo says to Owen as she walks up to him in their ER.

"Incoming trauma. 40 year old male police officer with head trauma and gun shot wounds to the legs and chest," Owen says.

"This isn't a Paeds case," Jo replies.

"I know, but we have an unusually high about of surgeries on today and you are the only one left that I can count on. I really need some extra help. It's all hands on deck," Owen replies, "can I count on you?" He asks Jo.

I feel my heart beat in my chest, pounding with every breath I take. My heart rate, I can feel it getting faster and faster and faster. This can't be happening. This man can't be coming in with head trauma and gun shot wounds. He can't. I don't know if I can do it. His injuries, they sound exactly like David's.

"Jo, can I count on you?" Owen asks again.

"Sorry, I'm, yes," Jo replies snapping out of her daze.

"Good. Gown up and meet me in trauma room 1," Owen replies.

Flashback

Jo lays in bed, it was 11pm and she was finally ready to rest her tired aching pregnant body. She turns out the light and as she does she hears the phone ring. Defeated, She turns on the light and answers the phone.

"Hello Jo speaking," Jo says tiredly.

"Dr Maidenway, it's commander White calling. I am so sorry about calling so late. I wish I could call you under better circumstances," she begins.

"Better circumstances? What are you talking about? Is something wrong?" Jo asks panicking as she sits up in her bed.

"I'm afraid there's been an accident involving David. He is being medically evacuated to Concord hospital," commander white says.

"Wh... What happened?" Jo asks panicking.

"He was involved in a boarding incident. That's all I can tell you. But he is being very well looked after. The medical evacuation went very well and he's in the best hands," Commander White replies.

"Okay, I um, I need to be there. When will he be there?" Jo asks panicking.

"His ETA is one hour," she replies.

End flashback

"Jo, Jo, I need you to stay with me. I need you to hang three units. He's loosing a lot of bloody very quickly," Owen orders.

"Yes, sorry," Jo replies snapping out of her daze. Jo hangs three units.

"We are on damage control down here. We need to get him in the OR as soon as possible if we even want a chance at saving this mans life," Owen replies.

A chance. That's all David needed, he needed a chance. This man is going through what David went through. The injuries, they're uncanny. I read David's chart. I knew exactly what he went through, and I knew exactly how much pain he was in.

Flashback

"Ma'am, are you okay? Do you need a moment?" The doctor asks as she sits with Jo in the waiting room at concord hospital. The doctor had just delivered the tragic news to Jo that David didn't survive the procedure and died.

"No, what I need you to do is I need you to tell me again because what you're saying doesn't make any sense. It can't be true. My husband can't be dead," Jo replies harshly.

"The injuries your husband sustained were to much on his heart. His heart couldn't handle all of the pressure and he died. Your husband did not survive the procedure," she says regretfully.

"I'm a doctor, I know what dead means. Dead is dead…. and he can't be... He can't be dead," Jo snaps.

"I am, so, so sorry. We did everything we could," the doctor says.

"Well your everything wasn't good enough was it. My husband is dead, your everything wasn't everything!" Jo yells. "You should of tried harder. He deserved more from you. I'm 7 months pregnant and I have three children. What am I supposed to say to them? That the hospital that was supposed to save their father didn't try hard enough?" Jo asks angrily.

"I understand that you're hurt and you're angry and you're confused. But it was a miracle that your husband survived as long as he did," she says softly.

"I don't need you to use the doctor voice on me. I'm a doctor, it's not going to work on me," Jo snaps.

"Again, I am so sorry. I'm going to give you some time alone so you can process this," the doctor replies gently before leaving Jo.

End flashback

In the OR

"Damn it, He's crashing! Start CPR!" Amelia calls. Jo begins to bag the man while Owen begins compressions.

"Clear!" Amelia says as she stands over them with the defibrillator.

"Clear!" Owen and Jo reply.

Amelia shocks the patient. "Charge to four hundred," she instructs. Owen and Jo commence CPR and everybody pulls out all the stops to try and revive the police officer.

Thirty minutes later

He's gone," Owen announces after a failed 30 minute revival attempt.

"Crap," Amelia says sadly before calling time of death.

"No, no, what are you doing? Charge to 400. We have to keep trying, we can't stop now," Jo cries.

Why are we stopping? This man deserves our best, what if this wasn't our best? What happens if he starts to breathe again with this attempt. What if this is too soon to stop trying. This man.. He... He... He probably has a wife and a family. He probably has children who count on him. We can't stop now.

"Jo, he is gone," Owen says sternly.

"No, no, we have to keep trying," Jo replies in denial.

"Dr Maidenway, he is gone. We did everything we could," Owen says sternly.

Flashback

"I want to see his chart. I want to know everything that happened. I need to know that your best was truly your best," Jo tells the doctor as she returns to see her.

"Okay, I can arrange that," the doctor replies.

"What should I tell my children? I don't know what to say to them, I don't know what to do. I feel numb and I don't know what to do," Jo pleads.

"You need to do what you feel is best in your heart," the doctor replies.

"I can't feel my heart, I just feel numbness," Jo replies.

"You do what feels right to your heart," she repeats. "I'll get you David's chart," the doctor adds.

End flashback

"Jo, are you okay? You seem very out of it," Amelia says as they scrub out of the surgery

"I'm... I'm fine," Jo replies abruptly before leaving the Scrub room.

Fine? Really Jo? You're not fine. You were just involved in a trauma so similar to the one that killed David. You are so not fine right now. Go and see Dr Milton tomorrow. She'll help you understand. Now it's time to go home. Poor Alex is probably traumatised... If he is he'll never offer to watch the kids again.

At the house

Wholly shit, what happened? My house looks like a bomb went off in it. Crap, the kids broke him. There is paint all over the floors and toys all down the hallway. I don't know if I can even find Alex in all of this mess. Ah, there you are.

"Alex, Alex," Jo whispers as she gently shakes him. Alex was asleep on the living room couch.

"Jo, Jo, hey Jo," he says as he slowly wakes up and sits up on the lounge.

"How did it go?" She asks quietly.

"They're... They're all asleep... I think," he replies.

"What happened to my house?" Jo asks gently.

"We we're supposed to be building a fort. But they Ruby pulled out paints and turned it into a paint fight. I couldn't stop it Jo, I tried but they're very persistent," Alex says.

"They broke you didn't they? My children broke you," Jo says sadly.

"They all ganged up with each other and then ganged up on me. I'm sorry, but they're like a pack of Ferrell wolves," Alex says.

"No, it's okay. I get it, I live with them, I know what you're saying. You were nervous weren't you?" Jo asks

"Extremely. I didn't want to screw it up," Alex replies.

"They are usually very well behaved children. But you are somebody new and they used that and they fed of the fact that you were nervous. They can just sense it and That's what they feed off. You need to be confident and strong. They can sense when they can walk right over somebody and they play on it big time. And it probably didn't help that this was your first time with them," Jo replies. "I'm so sorry," Jo replies.

"I did see the sweet side in them too and they were lots of fun. This was a babysitting experience I'll never forget," he replies.

"Go home Alex. You look exhausted," Jo says.

"What about this mess?" Alex asks

"I'll get the Ferrell wolves to clean it up tomorrow. I'm going to Skype David before bed. I'll see you later," Jo replies.