Dixie went inside to get her keys and put her shoes on. Colby asked her, "What are you doing? Where are you going?"

"I am driving Jon back to the hotel. He took a taxi over here."

"So? Let him take a taxi back."

She glared at him, "I won't do that. I will be back later." Before she shut the door, she looked back at him, "Don't go anywhere. We are going to have a long talk when I get back."

He didn't like the sound of that and he was worried that he might have gone too far when he yelled at Jon. Dixie wasn't happy with what he said and he hoped he hadn't pushed her right back to Jon by saying things to hurt him.

Dixie stepped back out the door and took Jon's arm. "Come on, get in the car. I am taking you back to the hotel." He nodded and followed her to the car. When they were on the road, Jon reached over and squeezed her thigh. She entwined her fingers with his, knowing he needed the comfort from her. She knew he was still upset and Colby's words had really affected him. He saw her wearing Colby's shirt and he looked at it as if he wanted to rip it to shreds. She hated that he was hurting and she couldn't make it go away. She didn't want to lie to him and tell him things to make him feel better if it wasn't the truth. The silence in the car was deafening, neither one knowing what they should say. She finally asked, "So when are you leaving tomorrow?"

"My flight isn't until Saturday morning, babe. We aren't on the card for Friday night, just Saturday and Sunday in Virginia."

"Oh, okay. I was thinking you both had to leave tomorrow. You usually do the shows on Friday so I just assumed you were this week too. I guess I need to pay better attention to the schedule."

"It's fine, Dix. A lot has been going on. Look, I know you said you needed space and I will give you that, but can we spend some time together. Maybe we can have dinner tomorrow. We can just talk, nothing else. I just want to be with you for a little while before I have to leave again."

"That would be good, Jon. There has been only a couple of times we have been together and not had sex; only talking afterwards. I think it would be good for us to do that."

"I do too. I won't say that I won't miss the sex, because you know I will, but I will give you whatever you need from me. I mean that."

"I know you do, baby. Thank you. I know this isn't fair to you and I don't want to jerk you around."

"Just don't make me wait forever to tell me you are mine. I know you don't want to hear this but I am going to say it anyway. I know you will come back to me, Dix. I fucking know Colby and shit won't change with him. I know you still love him and all of your doubts started when you came back here. I know in my heart you belong with me and all of this bullshit is just because you remember how good things once were. But you know and I know they haven't been that way in long time. But I said I would give you some time to sort out how you feel. I love you enough to do that." He said he would give her time but he figured it wouldn't be long until she was tired of Colby's behavior and she would be done with him for good. Or he would force Colby to bow out.

"I won't make you wait forever." She knew this was eating at him and he was trying hard not to show it. He had survived by not showing his emotions and not letting people get close to him. He was terrified of being hurt, and now here he was, his heart wrapped up in her and she was confirming to him why he should never have let anyone in. She felt horribly about telling him how much she loved him and wouldn't leave him, only to get back home and have all her feelings twisted.

She pulled up in the parking lot of the hotel and took a deep breath. "We're here."

"Yep. Babe, I hope I didn't piss you off with what I said."

"You didn't. You have a point, Jon. I really just need to clear my head."

"You want to come up for a while?"

"No, I had better not."

Jon didn't want to sound disappointed but she knew he was. She had to go home and hash things out with Colby. He had gotten some things off his chest, now it was her turn. "Okay, I understand. Can I at least ask for a kiss goodnight?"

She smiled, "Of course." She leaned over and cupped his cheek, bringing his lips to meet hers. His kiss was soft and sweet, much different from how he usually kissed her. He gently slipped his tongue in her mouth, savoring the sweet taste of her. He really didn't want to let her go and she could feel the desperation in his lips and his touch. He lingered a bit longer, his heart telling him not to let her leave. She finally pulled away from him and could still feel his lips on hers. She swept the messy hair off his forehead and gazed into the eyes she loves so much. "I do love you, Jonathan. Please don't forget that."

"I won't. I love you too. Call me, okay?"

"I will, baby. Good night. Try and get some sleep." He leaned over and delicately pecked her lips before nodding and getting out of the car, while he had the self-control to do it. He watched as she drove away with part of him wishing that he had never gone to their house. He thought about what Colby said, and her asking him for a break and figured if he would have just stayed in his room, she wouldn't have felt so pressured.

When Dixie made it back home, Colby was sitting up, waiting for her. Part of her dreaded the conversation, but she knew she had to get it off her chest. There were a lot of things she had been holding in for a while. She sat down on the couch next to him and he scooted closer, putting his arm around her. "So we are alone again, and hopefully no interruptions. You wanted to talk, mama?"

She moved his arm and shifted her back to the arm of the sofa. She crossed her legs and faced him. "Yeah, we need to, Colby."

Her serious tone worried him but he sat back and listened. "Okay. Let's talk then. You tell me what I can do to fix us, Dixie."

"God Colby, there is so much I need to say."

"Then tell me. I am listening, babe."

"First, I know I have said it a dozen times but I am sorry about cheating on you. Regardless of how things were going between us, I never should have done it. It was very, very wrong of me. I know this doesn't mean anything but I never intended it to go so far and I am sorry I lied to you for so long about it. Our problems were no excuse for betraying you. We had issues but you were never mean or abusive to me and you didn't and don't deserve me hurting you. That being said, you never seemed to want to acknowledge that we even had problems. That is one of the biggest issues. You were okay with the status quo. When we first got together, Colby, you made me feel loved every day. I felt your passion when we made love and you were spontaneous and romantic. Even before you were called up, you stopped treating me that way. I was no longer a priority for you, but getting to the main roster was all you cared about."

"Dix…"

"Let me finish while I can, Colby." He closed his mouth and let her continue. "We started spending less time together, even though I was living with you in Tampa. I felt left out of your life. All the time you were in the indies, I never felt like that. But I understood and I loved you so I never said anything. Then you made it to WWE and I saw you even less. I don't blame you for that because I know how much it meant to you and how much you loved it. But things started really to go downhill for us then. I didn't feel as much like your girlfriend as I did your maid, your personal assistant, your secretary and your live-in whore. In the beginning, the sex was great. The longer we were together, I thought I could be more open with you about my fantasies and what I wanted, but you shot me down. You seemed less interested in even trying during the time you were actually home and we acted more and more like an old married couple. I was willing to do whatever with you, even move to Iowa for you, but you never were willing to step out of your comfort zone for me." Dixie's voice was cracking, tears coming to her eyes as she spoke.

"I stood by you, Colby because I love you. I did those things for you because I wanted to take care of you. I never expected thanks, but I did expect you to put in an effort too and appreciate me. I thought if I waited until you were solidified in WWE that things would improve instead of getting worse. I hoped if I were patient that you would tell me you wanted to marry me, and things would be okay. I always thought that if you love someone enough, everything else would fall into place. But that didn't happen either. I couldn't understand what else I had to do to make you pay me the same attention and give me the same devotion as you did your job."

"About Jon, I know you don't want to hear this and I am not sure I want to say it, but I think it needs to be out in the open. I had been drinking and so had he, but that is no excuse. He made me feel… well, he just made me feel. I was miserable and had made another trip on the road with you, hoping to spice things up between us. You were flirting in the bar with the bartender and I just lost it. I had my doubts already and had them for a long time that the reason you were so bland with me at home was because you were cheating while you were on the road. When I saw that, in my mind it just confirmed it. Jon was exciting and he made me feel alive again. He makes me feel important, loved and desired. For God's sake, Colby, you were more interested in your Xbox or PlayStation than me." Colby's heart was breaking again hearing her talk about Jon that way. He never realized how frustrated she was with him. He accepted part of the blame for pushing her away, but never imagined how much his actions pushed her to finding someone else.

"The second to last time I came on a road trip with you, we had that big fight and some of this I told you then. You promised me that things would be different and they were for a couple of weeks. You asked me to come on the road with you all the time and I told you it was because of work. That was only partially true. I didn't want to quit my job to do that, but also, I had broken things off with Jon after Joe found out, and I was committed to being faithful to you and trying to make us work. I didn't want there to be any temptation. Colby, I don't want you to ever doubt that I love you. God knows I do and I have tried so hard to keep us together. I just don't know what to do anymore." Colby felt the hot tears roll down his face as he listened to the despair in her voice. She hated to see him cry and regretted more and more that things ever transpired between her and Jon.

"I am not telling you this to pour salt on the wound, baby, I'm not. I just want you to understand. I have never stopped loving you. Never. There is nothing you could say to make me feel any worse about what I have done than I already do. Things never should have happened with him and they never should have carried on, but I let myself fall in love with him. There is no excuse for hurting you, there isn't. But I can't deny how I feel for him too. Being back here has made me remember all the good times with you and I don't want to throw that away, but I don't want feel like your old, worn out, broken in sneakers anymore either. There are all these doubts in my head after what you told me the past couple of days. Can things ever be good between us again? Can you trust me again? Can I believe you when you tell me you will do anything to make us work? Will I be happy and better off with Jon? I just have so many questions in my mind. When I left, it was because I was tired of working so hard to salvage our relationship and I didn't feel like you cared to save us."

"Dixie, I don't even know where to start. I am sorry I ever made you feel that way. I am sorry I didn't listen to you and make you feel important. I am sorry I didn't appreciate you. I am sorry I never let go of my inhibitions and fulfill your fantasies like you always wanted from me. I wish I could do things over and make them right with you. Everything you said is right, and I see that now. I swear to you I will give you no less than 110% if you give me the chance to. I guess I didn't realize we were in as dire straits as we were."

"As I said before, I can't lie and tell you that I can forgive you overnight, but I will, in time. I will learn to trust you again and I will make things good between us, better than they were before. And no, you would never be better off with Jon. He doesn't know you like I do and he can't love you the way I do. He can't. It's just not in him, babe. You know that. Yeah, I wish you had told me earlier before he got his hooks into you and we could have worked it out then, before he had the chance to snow you."

Dixie cried, gripping the throw pillow tightly. She felt so conflicted, her heart being yanked in two different directions. Colby moved closer to her and pulled her into his arms. He hated to see her cry and knew everything was taking its toll on her. He saw her struggling with her feelings, afraid to give him another chance. He held on to her and whispered softly to her, trying to calm her down. They both were wrecks from the emotional conversations of the night and needed the comfort they always found in the other.

Her heart and her mind were at war, leaving her confused. She didn't want to inflict pain on either one of the men she loves anymore, but she honestly had no idea what to do. She realized Colby must have sensed what she was feeling. "Dixie, you don't have to tear yourself up like this. Just come home to me. We will repair our relationship and be stronger than ever. We love each other and have been through so much together. We are worth fighting for. I know you believe that too."

"I do, Colby but I can't just dismiss how I feel about Jon. I know you don't think I do, but I love him. And he loves me too."

"Why do you love him, Dixie? What can he give you that I can't besides sex? If you want the kinky shit, I will try that too. Honestly, what do you see in him that makes you even consider choosing him over me?"

"He makes me feel loved, wanted, appreciated, sexy. He listens to me. He cares to ask me how I feel and really listens. He is attentive to me and when we are together, all of his focus is on me. We don't talk about wrestling or about how his match went. I don't sit and watch him play video games and him only talk to me when he wants me to get him another beer. He gives me anything I want: only wanting to make me happy. He was willing to sacrifice his own happiness so I could be happy. He tells me what I mean to him and how much he needs me. He doesn't just tell me I am his life, he shows me. He opens up to me and lets me see who he really is, Colby, and I can open up to him too. He understands the problems I have with my family and he gets it. I don't think you ever have. You had the perfect Leave It To Beaver family life and you can't relate to mine. Like you asking if I would run to my mom's. Like why would I and how could you even ask that. Like you never paid attention to anything I said about her and kept encouraging me to make up. The truth is, it started out as just him filling a void sexually, but he came to mean so much more to me. He became my confidant when it should have been you. "

Her words hit a nerve in Colby. He regretted asking her that question. Part of him hoped that it was just the sex and it could be easily fixed. He never expected her to have that strong of a connection with him. "It should have been me, you're right. And I am really fucking sorry I asked."

"I am sorry, Colby. I told you, I am not saying this to hurt you but we need to clear the air, right now. So if you want to, go ahead. You tore into Jon, now let me have it."

"Jon is different, you know what I mean. As I said, I don't like it, but I can see how I drove you away, but he was like my fucking brother and he did me so dirty. You said you started it, but he could have told you no. He didn't have to give in to you and take you away from me. I will never forgive him. Especially now that you tell me that you love him. I would still have been pissed if it was just once, but the fact that you carried on for so long is what kills me. You're right, I am angry and hurt, and I don't understand how you could treat me that way. I know I fucked up, but how could you not tell me and just let it go on? That I don't get. Everything you said is the truth, Dixie. I don't have to say it. You know that even with our problems, it wasn't a reason to cheat on me. Why did you not ever just come out and tell me what I needed to fix? Why did you not tell me I was going to lose you if things didn't change? You were in my bed telling me you love me, meanwhile you were sneaking off to be in his bed and tell him the same damn thing!" He was mad but couldn't completely be furious with her, knowing he had secrets of his own, and she had been right about him cheating on her with someone else. He understood because he was scared to tell her the truth too. Even now, he couldn't bring himself to tell her. Jon knew about it and even said something on the phone to him, and Colby couldn't figure out why Jon hadn't told her. He knew that if he did, it would be something that would destroy their relationship permanently.

Colby gritted his teeth and clenched his fists. "I know you know I found your little bag. I know nothing in there was used with me. It makes me sick to think of what you let him do to you. It eats me alive to think of him touching you that way. But more than that, I am disgusted with myself for not being the one to give you what you wanted. You tried over and over and I just wouldn't do it. And I never told you why, just gave you excuses."

"Why?" She wondered why he never would be aggressive with her and now her interest was really piqued. She didn't understand why he wouldn't tell her then with everything else coming out in the open.

"I will tell you, but not tonight. Look, we have said all of this, and I really don't want to argue anymore. It doesn't change a damn thing. It happened and I just have to deal with it. I am pissed off, but I can't tell you I don't love you. Maybe I shouldn't, but I do. If I didn't love you so much, I wouldn't give a fuck who you were running off to be with and I wouldn't be sitting here listening to you if I didn't want you to come back."

"I still love you too, Colby. I am angry with myself for everything you just said. I should have told you. But more than that, I should never have let it happen. But you are right and I can't change the past. I just need some time to sort out my feelings. I feel like I am stuck on a see-saw, going back and forth between you. It is not fair to either of you to have your hearts hanging in the balance."

"What do you want from me, Dixie?"

"I just want some time, Colby. That is what I need. To not be pressured by either of you so I can make some sense out of the mess I have made."

"Okay, mama. I said before I would fight for you and I will, but if you need some space, okay. We could both use some space to think about things I guess. There is one thing I have to know though. Did you tell Jon the same thing or just me?"

"I told him too."

"Good. I can live with that if I know you aren't telling me one thing and going back to him behind my back."

"No, Colby. I would never do that to you again. Okay, it is getting late and I am drained. I am going to go take a hot bath and relax before bed. I am glad we had this talk, but I am exhausted."

"Me too."

"I will sleep in the guest room tonight, so don't worry."

"No, you won't."

"Colby…"

"No, I will. You stay in our bed. You picked it out after all. I will sleep in the other room. I will give you space like you want, mama. I promise."

She stood up and kissed his cheek. "Thank you. No matter what, you will always be my Colby-bear." She smiled at him and he chuckled.

"And you are my Dixie-Pixie." She giggled and turned to go upstairs.

"Goodnight Col."

"Goodnight."

She went into their bathroom and ran a bubble bath, soaking for an hour before finally getting out. She used lavender to try to settle her nerves and help her sleep. She had so many thoughts running through her mind and she just wanted to shut her brain down. Part of her was glad she had gotten things off her chest but part of her hated hurting Colby. She also wondered what he wasn't telling her. She decided they were all problems for tomorrow when she would start trying to figure things out. She didn't want to keep either one of them waiting, so she had to make her mind up soon.

She called Jon before falling asleep as she told him she would. He was awake and she could tell he was still upset. He was good at hiding it, but she had learned to see through him. When they hung up, Jon was lying in bed thinking about what he could do to make her see that she belonged with him. He thought about blackmailing Colby into letting her go, knowing a few secrets himself, but decided it would be better if she came to him on her own. He also didn't want to hurt her by revealing things that she didn't know about Colby's time on the road. He did keep it in the back of his mind though, as a last resort in case she actually did want to go back to him. He didn't want it to come to that, but he planned on winning the war, one way or another. Jon wasn't going to let Colby have her. He wasn't going to let her go, no matter what the cost. Even if it meant dismantling The Shield.