3

He had tried to play it off in the mess hall. He had laughed it off with Gardner making comments that if everyone had Commanders as good looking as Shepard the Asari would have a run for their money. Gardner had laughed it off with him. A good attempt but one that never touched his eyes.

He believes it.

In a daze he finished his meal and thanked Gardner . His mind wondering if any of it could be true. It seemed impossible Hell she never took Vega on missions after the shuttle crash, they were never seen together on the ship. When they spoke it seemed like a very cold mentor-pupil relationship outside of her N7 training in the bay. In the bay….Where they were alone for hours on end…..

Lost in his confusion Kaidan almost bowled over Tali who was standing in front of the memorial wall talking into her ear piece. Guarrus' thick grumble could be heard on the other end.

"Oppff oh sorry Tali!" He grabbed her elbow in an attempt to help right the Quarian. She pulled her elbow away and the LT could swear he heard anger in her voice.

"Kaidan. Have you spoken to Shepard?" Her voice accusatory.

"No I was just heading back from dinner and I.."

She put a finger to her earpiece. "No Garrus she's not here. Must be down in the bay. Are you going to talk to her?" He heard a negative sounding reply from the piece before Tali turned back to him.

"She's upset Kaidan even a blind Krogan can see that. We were all worried about Liara but the Commander is taking it really bad. It was only the second time I have seen her cry." Her voice dropped low on the last part, confiding in the other tech.

Second? In the three years he had known and loved Jane Shepard he had never seen her cry. Not after Ashley, not after Earth's initial attacks, never.

"I have never." He replied flatly.

"You have but you don't remember it." She corrected matter of factly. He gave her a questioning look. In response she brought up her Omnitool and began punching in commands.

"Mars." Was her reply. She sent him the files she pulled and his omni-tool beeped alerting him it had been received.

"She needs you Kaidan. She was there for you and she won't let anyone else close enough." There was the accusation again.

Back in the observation room he pulled up the vid Tali had sent him. Briefly he wondered how Tali had gotten these since the Quarian had only rejoined the Normandy after him. But he reminded himself no matter how good he was with tech Tali was 100 times better.

It was eerie to watch what had so nearly been his death. The android emerge from the ship and to hear his own bones breaking. Being grabbed by the helmet and thrown lifeless. And then he saw what he had not before. Possibly the bravest and dumbest things anyone had ever done for love. Shepard, a small woman by most standards dropped her assault rifle and charged the android like a krogan.