'Depresso – that feeling you get when you run out of coffee.'
January left and February entered. Still Ginny was away. The waitresses spent a quiet hour decorating the café in red white and pink. He let them do what they wanted, and on the day, everyone who ordered a coffee received a complimentary chocolate.
Many of the young women that came into the café had flirted with him, and more than one had left their phone number for him. He may have smiled and even flirted back, for it added up in the tips. But at the end of the day, as he split his tips between the waitresses, he then threw the scraps of paper and business cards in the bin.
And still Ginny was away.
She returned the week after Valentine's day. He smiled in welcome, willing his heart to slow down. She was conversing with Nancy, who was showing her the new tattoo Nancy's boyfriend had done for her for Valentine's day. He watched on as Ginny lifted her shirt and lowered her pants to her hipbone, Nancy looking on interestedly.
His heart sped up at the thought of Ginny having a tattoo. His mind wandered as to what it could possibly be. In his wonderings, he burnt the milk for the cappucinos he'd been making. He cursed and started over. When he turned back again, Ginny had left.
Nancy was busy clearing tables and cleaning them down, so he didn't get a chance to talk to her immediately. When she came to drop off an order, he stopped her quickly. "So, er, everything okay with Ginny?"
Nancy smiled, well aware of his interest, thanks to Helen. "Why do you ask?" she asked him, in an annoyingly knowing way.
"Well, uh, she didn't stay long. I wondered how she got on, you know, with her team and all," he mumbled.
"I'll ask her tomorrow, we're going to the flicks," said Nancy, coming around the back to plate a slice of their cake of the day for a customer.
"Oh, er, nice. Great. Have fun," he said.
"I'm sure we will," she said, and she took the cake to the customer.
Next day his mind was on Ginny spending the day with Nancy. Stacey noticed his distraction. "Everything okay, Boss?" she asked.
"Fine," he said, more annoyed with himself than anything. He looked at her. "You off, then?" he asked.
"Yeah. I'm grabbing Becca from my mum's and then meeting Ginny and Nancy at the playround up the road. They took my Ryan and Ginny's godson to the movies this morning," she said happily.
"Really? That was nice of them," he said. He knew both Helen and Nancy had babysat for Stacey at times. For three very different women, they had forged quite a friendship, one that apparantly now included Ginny.
Stacey nodded. "And when Helen gets off tonight, she, Ginny and Nancy are going dancing at some club. Nancy's boyfriend is the bouncer, and he'll get them in for free."
He nodded.
"So, are you ever going to ask Ginny out?" asked Stacey, removing her apron and shrugging on her coat.
"Pardon?" he asked, playing dumb.
She shot him a look. One he was sure was part of every mother's repertoire. It was the 'don't play dumb with me, I know exactly what's going on,' look.
"Nancy, Helen and I think you should go for it. You'd make a really good couple," she said.
"Oh, well, if you three think so," he drawled sarcastically.
She ignored him. "In the whole year I've worked here, I've never seen you with a woman...or a man. Not even interested in one. What are you doing about...you know? S-e-x?" she whispered conspiritually.
He chuckled. "I appreciate you looking out for me, but I think this conversation just crossed a line between employer and employee. Go, have fun," he told her.
She blushed. "Sorry. It's just, sometimes you seem so sad, so alone. Ginny is the first person you really seem keen on. She's great, we all like her. Why not give it a shot?"
"Ginny Weasley is way too good for the likes of me," he said, picking up a sponge to wipe down the coffee making area.
"See? I didn't even know her last name, but you do. Come to think of it, I don't even know what sport she plays. Do you?" asked Stacey.
He shook his head, knowing he'd already given away more than he should. "Go, have fun with the kids. Here, buy them some ice cream or something," he said, fishing a ten pound note out his pocket. "Go on," he urged, at her reluctance. "For Ryan, Becca and Te-, er Ginny's godson."
She shot him a look as she took it. "If I crossed a line, I'm sorry...but you're a good boss, and a great guy. We just want you to be happy," she said gently. She walked to the door, then looked back at him and smiled. "Thanks for this." She waved the money. "See you Wednesday."
He nodded, busying himself with cleaning the cups, saucers, plates and cutlery once she had gone. From time to time he did a simple cleaning charm, but for the most part, he still did things the muggle way. He then rearranged the cake display, which was now half empty after the lunch trade, and checked the drinks fridge. Anything to keep busy and not think about Ginny.
Of course, it was all they could talk about the next few days. How much the boys had loved the movie. How cute the three kids had been, playing at the playground and having ice cream.
But then he had to endure them talking about the night at the club. How great the music was, how they loved Ginny's cute outfit, wondering where she had got it from. How many guys had hit on her, and how she'd drunk them all under the table, and even made sure they all got home safely. Yeah, Ginny was one of them now. Nearly all day, it was Ginny, Ginny, Ginny, till he wanted to scream!
The girl herself had been away again, he supposed for her sport. It was now March and the Valentine's day decorations had been stored away.
Ginny turned up on the Thursday afternoon. She was warmly greeted by Helen, who was working. "Hey, how are you?"
He didn't hear her reply as he had several orders to make. He did see Helen get her an energy drink from the fridge, and plate a piece of chocolate cake for her. He kept an eye on her when he could.
She chatted easily with Helen as she swept past on her way to clearing tables and taking orders. The rest of the time she read the daily newspaper. The other girls had mentioned it was strange she didn't have a mobile phone to stay in touch with while she was away and he wondered if she understood many of the items in the newspaper.
Whether it had been her father's influence or her genuine curiousity, but Ginny was generally interested in the goings on in the muggle world, and had often asked him and Hermione questions. He had thought it was adorable.
He shook his head to clear away those memories and keep his mind on his job. When he had some down time, he helped Helen out by clearing a few tables himself. One was close to her, so he headed there first. "Hey," he greeted her.
"Hi, Elliot John," she greeted.
With a start, he just remembered her quest to discover his name, which apparantly started now. "Nope," he chuckled.
"Edgar Jospeh?"
"Not even close, sweetheart."
"Edmund Jason?"
"Keep trying."
"Will you even tell me if I'm right?" she asked.
He hesitated. "Sure."
"Eduardo José."
He shook his head.
She sighed. "That's all I've got for now."
Phew. "How's things?" he asked, trying to appear nonchalant.
She shrugged. "Been busy. It's my brother's birthday today, and he's getting married this Saturday. I've been home, trying to help out with wedding stuff. Totally makes me want to elope," she grinned.
He didn't grin back. "Your brother's getting married...this Saturday? As in, the day after tomorrow?"
She nodded. "He and Herm-his fianceé are getting a bit emotional. Their best friend disappeared over a year ago, and Ron, my brother, was hoping he'd be back in time for the wedding. But there hasn't been any word, and they're both a bit down about it."
"Why would he do that, this friend?" he asked.
Ginny looked sad. "He'd been through a lot. We all thought he was coping, but one day he was gone."
He slid into the seat across from her. "You must hate him for that, all the worry, all the questions?"
She looked at him, then looked away. "We just want him to come home," she said softly. "The rest doesn't matter."
He opened his mouth to ask her a question, but just then Helen came up. "Sorry, EJ – order up," she said, shooting them both an apologetic look.
"Sure, no problems." He looked back at her. "Hey, can you hang around?"
She shrugged. "Sure."
They had a small rush then, and to his surprise, Ginny helped clear a couple of tables, offering her own up when a couple came in. She then perched on a stool near the register and began throwing names out. Helen joined in when she was around.
"Eli, Eric, Elijah...um, ooh, Ethan? Are you sure, because you look like you could be an Ethan? No, okay, um, Elliot! Like the boy in ET!"
"Maybe it's something geeky like Eugene?" suggested Helen, chuckling. He flicked his tee towel at her and she laughed.
"Oh, Everett? That's a nice British name," guessed Ginny.
"Enzo?" asked Helen.
Ginny frowned. "Isn't he on that kids television show that Stacey's kids watch? The red one?"
Helen thought for a moment. "I think that's Elmo."
"Elmo?" grinned Ginny. He shook his head as he chuckled.
Ginny nodded. "Ooh, Earl?"
Helen nodded excitedly. "He kind of looks like he could be an earl of a castle. In a rugged, don't-care way. "
Both women studied him thoughtfully, making him uneasy. He quickly handed Helen two cups of coffee, for the couple that had taken Ginny's table.
"You could just tell us, you know," said Ginny. "Or is it something really bad?" Elphias? Ernie?"
"No and no," he told her. "So, your brother and his fianceé?"
"Hermione," she told him.
He nodded. "Getting married on Saturday, you said?"
She nodded. "At my parent's home. Midday. The ceremony is outside."
"Big wedding?" he asked.
She shook her head. "Nope. I mean, there are a lot of us in my family, but that's what it will be, family and friends only. No outsiders."
"So you'll be away all weekend?" he asked.
She nodded. "I'll be back Sunday afternoon, but then I'm off Tuesday for a week."
He took some money from a customer for a Coke and a doughnut, then for a bottle of water.
Helen was clearing more tables, as the small rush was over. "Thanks for helping out," he told Ginny.
She shrugged. "I don't want to get in the way and I may as well make myself useful."
The bell dinged, and they looked up as Ben came in. "Hey, I need to change a shift. Can we talk?" he asked him.
He nodded, pulling out the diary. This might just work out well for both of them.
~00~
He almost expected the wards wouldn't allow him through, but they did. Immediately his eyes went to the peculiar looking house. It had been so long since he'd been there. Inside and around were the people he loved most. People he'd left behind. People who had searched for him. People he'd hurt.
He'd deliberately arrived close to the time of the ceremony. Carefully checking his invisibility cloak was secure, he moved closer.
Most of the guests were already seated, and he saw Ron stand at the head of the aisle, shuffling nervously. Next to him, Arthur Weasley tried to calm him down. He felt a pang for his best friend.
Everywhere he looked he saw someone that meant something special to him. From the many red heads for the family he loved dearly, to Mrs Granger in the front row, waiting to see her daughter walk down the aisle on the arm of her father, every one of them was a part of him in some way.
Neville, Dean and Seamus. Luna, Parvati and Padma. Professors Macgonall and Flitwick. Hagrid. It was small and intimate; perfect.
Molly Weasley sat in the front row, sniffing into her handkerchief while holding a squirming Victoire on her lap. He thought about the big hugs she gave him, no, used to give him. How she insisted on feeding him huge plates of food. How she'd make him a treacle tart. How she had taken him into her home and her heart; another son.
Movement from the house caught his attention. He breathed in sharply as Ginny came out, holding Teddy Lupin's hand. Her pale green dress brought out her beautiful hair and he longed to run his hands through it just one more time.
Teddy toddled down the aisle, under the nervous watch of his grandmother. Everyone commented how cute he looked, carrying the rings on a pillow. He went to stand next to Arthur Weasley.
Ginny came down alone, smiling at all the guests but narrowing in on her brother. He saw Ron shrug at her, smiling sadly.
And then came the bride. He fought back tears as one of his best friends practically glided down the aisle to meet his other best friend. How beautiful she looked, how right it was that they were together. Hermione and Ron, Ron and Hermione. He was so happy he'd stuck with his decision to come and witness this.
It was over too soon. He told himself he was only staying for the ceremony, but he couldn't help but stay a little longer. Seeing Percy with some woman he assumed was his wife. He saw Bill and Fleur, obviously still so in love. George looked a bit miserable and he saw Ginny talk to him and he shook his head. She left him and went to help Andromeda with Teddy.
He didn't stay for the speeches. Didn't stay to hear Ron say they'd hoped Harry Potter would have returned by now. That he hoped, more than just about anything, that wherever Harry was, he was happy and safe. A hope that was shared by them all.
"To Harry," toasted Ron.
"To Harry," toasted the guests.
But he was already gone, back to the small apartment over the café. Back to his memories, back to his demons. Back to the safe life he'd created for himself.
Back to being alone.