Chapter 99 - Kibitz Prophylaxis

There were four left. Uchiha Inou versus Nara Shikake, and, recently-decided, Uchiha Karai versus Kashiwa Ichii.

"Things sure are going along quickly!" Karai said, cheerfully, from the observation deck. "They usually last a lot longer…"

"It goes by a lot faster when you're actually on the field, I think," her opponent, Ichii, replied. "All those fights before me seemed to go on for forever."

"Oh, you think?" Karai replied. "My fight with Garyuu-san did seem to go by pretty quickly…"

"You did fight him pretty fast. But I'd say it lasted about… average length." Ichii nodded a few times, to add to his credibility.

"I see, I see! I hope my fight with you lasts a bit longer, either way. I want to have a bit of fun with it!" Karai said, smiling with her eyes closed.

"Ah, yeah, you're my opponent, right?" Ichii said. "Uchiha Karai, isn't it?"

"Mhm! And you're… Kashiwa Ichii, correct?"

"Yep! Like the number one." He grinned. "Seems to be good luck to me, since I'm top in my class an' everything."

"Oh, that's nice," Karai replied. "I have a nickname like that, myself."

"Ah, really?"

"Mhm! Sorta embarrassing, though…" She looked away, her smile perfectly bashful.

"Aw, come on, I have to know."

"Well, see, it's Second-Place Karai. Since, no matter what I do, no matter how hard I try, I always seem to end up in second place…"

"Aww, that's too bad! I guess that means you'll end up losing, y'know, with destiny and all that."

She shook her head. "Nuh-uh. If I lost to you, I'd only be in third place, at best. The only person I'd ever lose to is my big brother." She pointed over the ledge. "It'd be embarrassing if anything else happened, so I'll try my best to beat you!"

"Huh, that's your brother down there?" Ichii said. His expression remained bright with ignorance. "The one that fought the fast kid?"

"Mhm."

"Can't wait to see how he does."

"Me neither," Karai replied, smiling warily. "Me neither."

Below them, Inou and Shikake were preparing.

"So, ground rules." Shikake was tapping her feet against the ground, to shake the dust off. "You don't probe my mind or anything, and I won't hit your face. Deal?"

Inou shook his head, his eyes to the ground in concentration. "Nope."

"Not afraid to get dirty, then?"

"I never have."

"Oh. Really."

He looked up, scowling. "Stop it. I'm not gonna go easy on you just 'cos you're my teammate."

"Aw, that's cute, you thought I was going to do that?" she said.

"No, I'm just letting you know."

"Whatever. You still can't probe my brain. I won't let you in." Her face turned, for a rare moment, utterly serious, rather than mocking or impatient.

"You don't set the rules," Inou replied. He turned to the examining officer. "Sir, I'm ready to start."

"Me too." Shikake set her stance, her hand reaching for a scroll.

"If both of you are ready, then… begin!"

Neither Shikake nor Inou wasted any time in getting started. Shikake darted away, her hands running over the scrolls in her jacket, considering her possibilities.

"Those puppets are damaged, Shikake!"

Across the arena, Inou was smiling. His hands were stretched, palms-outward, at her.

"It wouldn't do you any good to use them!"

Her brow furrowed, slightly. "I'm not gonna use a puppet, don't be stupid."

Inou shook his head, his smile widening. "Don't lie to me, Shikake. And don't use that medium-sized sword, either, I know you're not that good with it."

Shikake's mouth tightened in rare, true anger. "Don't read my mind," she said.

"Why don't you stop me, then?" Inou replied.

She unfurled the scroll in her hand and soon had two swords in hand, one long, one short. She ran forward.

Inou, however, was faster. And everywhere he managed to stop that was out of her range, there his hands were, making that dumb sign again.

"You're no good at close-range, Shikake, it's not gonna trip me up!" he called. "Those kunai you're thinking of would really do a better job, though I'd be able to dodge them pretty easily too."

"Shut up!"

Inou did not shut up.

In her frustration, she threw the two swords aside and reached for another scroll. She wouldn't be using the kunai.

"Use the kunai, Shikake-chan, come on." Inou's voice sounded almost, annoyingly, whiny.

She got out the boomerang shuriken, a trio of small, sharp pieces of metal attached to wires that could be easily thrown and returned, for sharp, painful cuts.

Inou, however, sighed. "I knew you were going for those, ugh…"

"Shut up shut up shut up." She whipped the shuriken at him, and managed to hit him on the arm, though only one of the blades nicked him, on account of his chainmail. "Think you're so damn clever." She caught the shuriken in her free hand, fingers closing with effortless muscle memory at just the right time.

"I'm sorry, am I bothering you?" Inou said. He hadn't even winced at the cut.

Shikake didn't say anything, whipping the shuriken at him again, this time aiming for his face. She missed, though one of the blades cut off some of the hair on that stupid bang of his. This wasn't much of a consolation prize. The shuriken returned to her hand.

Inou didn't even look tired. Shikake was breathing heavily and slowly, and her mouth felt dry. She reached for another scroll. The shuriken in her hand pierced her palm, and blood got on the paper as she summoned the kunai. She unfurled the scroll further for—

"Ah, and you're going to get the sickles too, right? Planning for a barrage?" Inou said, his face framed by the diamond-shaped space between his fingers.

"Stop poking around in my damn head, it's annoying!" she yelled, as the sickles in question appeared in her hand. The metal of her weapons made muffled clinking noises as her fingers struggled to contain them.

Inou just shrugged back, with that arrogant smile, with his hands still stretched, with his fingers still in her brain.

The scroll fluttered to the ground as she flung both hands forward. Wires and chains glistened from the sun and the blue chakra she now infused within them, to guide them better. She was going to cut that damn smile off his face.

"Ah, that's a little better!" he said, leaping sideways. His hands came apart for only a moment, to balance himself, but were soon back together in the mind-reading sign. "I know where you're trying to hit me, though, so it's not gonna work."

Shikake didn't say anything, her weapons rearing up like cobras in the air where Inou should have been, recoiling, re-aiming, and striking again. One of the kunai got his leg, as he was dodging away, but little else. "Ugh, stand still, damn it!" she said, mostly to herself.

"It won't help to add exploding tags to them, you know. I'd be able to see that even without my technique," Inou said.

"You're only telling me what you already know!" Shikake yelled, with her next attempt. The multitudes of wires and chains parted like tentacles and went for either side of Inou. "It's not impressing anyone!"

Inou barely managed to backflip over the pincer-like movement of Shikake's attack. But the sickles, larger than the kunai and shuriken, and slower with their heavy chains, managed to slice him upon his recovery, ripping the fabric of his shirt and badly lacerating his right shoulder, which began to bleed profusely.

But he didn't even seem to notice. He kept his hands in that sign. "It barely even hurts, Shikake. And, yes, if you keep it up like this, you'll just get less and less accurate. That was lucky."

She bared her teeth, the wires returning to her and quavering dangerously behind her, like tails. "Stop it with that stupid mind reading! It's not fair!"

"I'd be nothing but a wussy wimp if I didn't have it, Shikake-chan," Inou replied, flatly, and without sarcasm. "You'd rather have me that way, wouldn't you?"

"Anything's better than this act of yours!" she shouted, and sent one of the kunai out in a whip-fast movement, like a scorpion's tail. "Cut it out!"

Inou dodged the kunai, and the wire snapped from the force; the kunai sailed off and embedded itself into the wall behind him. "You sure hate being angry, Shikake-chan," he said. "What's up with that?"

"Nothing!" she yelled. Another whip, though this one missed him by a long shot, impacting with the wall with even greater force.

"Don't want to be treated like a kid by your parents, huh?" Inou said. His voice sounded mockingly sympathetic. "Getting angry doesn't really get you anything, does it?"

"Shut up!" She threw one of the sickles his way, this time, trying to direct it, aiming it with purpose. And it did hit him, but she miscalculated, and only the blunt, curved edge of the thing hit him in the stomach.

"Not even your problems are interesting," Inou said, with a tight voice. "Trying to make it look like you don't even care or have them when everyone feels that way." He started coming closer to her, with his hideous hands and face. "You're so predictable, Shikake-chan. Why can't you be original for once? This is almost too easy."

Shikake threw the rest of her weapons forward, and Inou covered himself just long enough for safety, before springing back into position.

(But when he opened his eyes again, she was smiling a smile that he was not comfortable with.)

"Original, huh." Her bloodied hands began wandering into her jacket. "Okay, I'll give you something original."

Inou's face crumpled slightly, so that his voice wouldn't. "Shikake, what is that."

"Oh, you don't know? Don't you know all of my weapons?" she said. She waved the scroll near her face. "Oh, wait—this one's new."

She bared her teeth again, in an animalistic smile, and summoned the scythe.

It was large, almost as tall as her, and made of tarnished red metal, though the long chain on the end of it was shiny and new. It had three curved blades, and they looked recently-sharpened.

"Beautiful, isn't it," she said, and took it in one hand, swinging it by the chain and throwing it towards Inou. He managed to get away, but the three blades left a deep gouge in the earth that was dangerously close to him. She pulled it back and it returned to her hand as if magnetized; the chain was now glowing with chakra.

The thin polish of confidence on Inou's face was starting to crack. He struggled to keep his hands together, possibly because of the blood loss in his right arm, possibly because of fear.

This only made her smile more. She was pleased with either possibility.

She raised the scythe above her head again.

And then she couldn't move.

Her arm felt frozen in place, and then, like invisible hands were yanking it down, it fell. Her hand pried itself open, and the scythe hit the ground with a thud.

She knew this technique. And sickening anger made her jaw clench.

Her father was on the field.

Chouko's father was, as well, and Inou's mother; Chouji was standing in front of Inou, ready to intercept any blow that might have come the boy's way, and Ino was standing behind him with her hands poised in the square body-possession sign, prepared to move him if he wouldn't.

"Stop the fight," Shikamaru said.

The crowd simmered with murmurs.

Inou dropped his hands. "What, no! Why?"

"Inou, this isn't about you," Ino said. Her voice was unusually stern.

"Nara-san, you just seriously compromised the fight," the examining officer said, approaching him, and not the others. "Can you explain this?"

Shikamaru stood, motionless, his shadow linked to his daughter. "She can't use that weapon."

Shikake seethed.

Hakkou peered back curiously. "Sir, there doesn't seem to be anything about it that would disqualify it from use."

"What if I told you that this scythe is the former property of the man who killed my sensei?"

Shikamaru said this, loudly.

There was a very prickly silence.

(Shikake felt like a dog getting its nose rubbed into an accident.)

"I refuse to see this match continue. Give the victory to Inou," Shikamaru continued.

Inou pushed his way forward, desperately, angrily. "No, no! Come on, let me fight, I don't care!"

Before he could reach Shikamaru, however, his mother got a hold of him, and he froze mid-step.

"Inou, stop," she said. "Please."

"It's just a weapon, Mom!" His eyes were fixed on her, aching.

"This issue is a lot bigger than you, Inou-kun," Chouji said, far more kindly than others would. "Please, stay out of it."

Inou trembled with rage in his useless body.

"Were you aware that your daughter was in possession of this weapon, Nara-san?" Hakkou interjected.

"No. I thought it was buried under twenty feet of dirt with the man who used to own it. I put it there myself," he added, sharply.

"It's a terrorist's weapon, Hakkou-san," Chouji said. "Part of Akatsuki. From the old days."

The name caused whispers like hisses to circle through the stands.

(In the Kage box, Kankuro's hands tightened into preventative fists.)

Hakkou thought about this, his eyes lowered and his mouth drawn, before he nodded, twice, and looked up. "I understand. Given those circumstances, then, I will have to disqualify Nara Shikake for the use of an illegal weapon."

There was no applause, only louder murmurs.

"NO! Come on!" Inou yelled.

Shikake said nothing.

"I'll be taking her with me," Shikamaru said. "If you could confiscate the weapon, officer."

"Oh, um, of course," Hakkou replied. He bent over and picked the scythe up, his eyes widening at either the lightness of the thing, or the history behind it. A chuunin proctor entered the arena and carried it away.

As soon as the exchange was over, Shikamaru disabled his jutsu and took Shikake by the shoulder. "You're coming with me."

Shikake said nothing, her body merely tensing at his touch, her eyes burning sideways.

Inou was frozen until after she and Shikamaru were out of sight. After which he burst, again. "MOM, why did you DO that?!" he yelled, flinging his arms sideways. The blood from his weaker right arm spattered the ground.

"Inou, please, this is an outside issue-"

"I didn't win that match fairly, Mom!"

"Of course it was fair, Inou-kun," Chouji said, from behind. "The examiner declared it and everything."

"But I didn't beat her!" His voice was full of furious condensation, almost tears. "I should have been able to beat her…!"

"Inou…" Ino put her hand on his undamaged shoulder. "You won the match. How you won it doesn't matter, and it won't matter to him. You understand?"

(But, of course, it did matter to Sasuke, and that mattered to Inou.)

"Now let's have a medic patch you up." She stood. "You're going to do wonderfully in your final fight."

"It's true, you made it to the final round, Inou-kun," Chouji added.

"I still should have been allowed to beat her," Inou grumbled, pushed along by his mother and into the waiting hands of a medic ninja.

Chouji patted her on the back, once they were gone. "We did the right thing, Ino."

She sighed. "I know."

(Though all she could think about was the look that Shikamaru had shot her when their eyes met in the stands, after the scythe had been produced, when they were wordlessly deciding what to do.)

(He looked disgusted by her.)

Shikamaru, meanwhile, had pulled Shikake into the small service tunnel that ran between the walls of the arena, and stopped her with her back to the concrete wall.

She kept her head down, but her eyes defiantly set upwards.

"Explain yourself," Shikamaru said.

"What do I have to explain?"

"That weapon. Where did you get it."

"I found it." She glanced sideways, almost casually.

"You found it."

"Yeah. So?"

"And where, exactly, did you find it."

"The clan forest, duh. Come on, you said you were the one that buried it," she added, glancing up at him with her small, sharp eyes.

Shikamaru just folded his arms tighter. "How did you know where to find it."

"I was bored when we were at Grandpa's one day so I went exploring and I found a map that had this whole area marked off as forbidden ground. And that sounded interesting, so… I checked it out a few times and figured there was something buried there." Her shoulders shifted as she folded her own arms, though far more loosely (and higher up on her chest, as if to protect her). "So I went out with Hyuuga Ekkusen a couple of weeks ago and had him look at the area, and there was something buried there. So I dug it up and decided to fix it and use it."

"You just dug it up."

"Yeah, uh, isn't that obvious?"

"Do you have any idea why that area is forbidden ground?" Shikamaru's voice was rising.

"Uh, no."

"That is the place where my sensei's murderer was defeated and buried."

"Oh, neat. That explains the skeleton I found down there, then," Shikake said, looking away, nodding slightly.

"Neat?" Shikamaru was close to shouting. "Shikake, that man's weapon, the one that you were using, was the one that was used to kill my sensei!"

"You don't need to say that again, I heard you the first time," Shikake replied.

"Shikake, do you not understand what the hell you did out there?"

She shrugged. "I don't get what the big deal is, it's just a weapon," she said.

"A weapon with a past, Shikake. The man who used to own it was part of the terrorist organization that, need I remind you, nearly killed both of your uncles."

She sighed. "Uh, yeah, duh, I know about Akatsuki, Dad, I'm not a freaking moron."

Shikamaru inhaled through his nose.

"And Uncle Kankuro and Uncle Gaara are okay now, aren't they?" she continued. "Plus it's not like Akatsuki's around any more, much less the guy that used to use that scythe. Whoever he was."

The muscles in Shikamaru's neck were tensing visibly, and his words shot out of his mouth like arrows. "Shikake, for fuck's sake, can't you take things seriously?"

The cool, smooth quality of her voice lessened, slightly. "To be honest, I think I'm being more serious about this than you, Dad. Here, let me ask you something: what's the difference between me using that scythe and, say… Uncle Kankuro using Sasori's puppets? Or Morizuru? I mean, wasn't Sasori the one that almost killed Uncle Kankuro in the first place? They're just weapons, Dad. They're just tools. Nobody really cares about history."

Shikamaru slapped her.

"Shikake, by using that weapon, you are disrespecting me, my sensei Asuma, his family, and my teammates. And I want you to apologize."

Shikake's head remained turned slightly by the slap, her cheek growing red. But her eyes moved to pierce his. "Why the hell should I?" she said. "It's not like I killed your precious sensei."

Shikamaru slapped her again, on her already-raw skin.

"You… are grounded," he said, through the breaths he was trying to catch. "No visits with your… uncles, nothing. And your…" And he sighed, not quite frustrated nor satisfied. "And your mother is going to hear about this."

"…well, at least I know what you really care about," Shikake said, under her breath, as he dragged her by the arm back to his box.