A sanity check.
That was what Kaidan had used as an excuse to get Shepard to have lunch with him at the Apollo.
God was that really the last time either one of them had taken a break? It felt like a lifetime ago.
"I dunno doc, I guess I just want to know she is pissed off at me and this isn't just a result of …who knows faulty wiring?"
"A deathwish, taking unnecessary risks pushing themselves too far." The hint of a smile from Chakwas leaves Kadian feeling confused.
"That wasn't in her file."
"No Major, it was in yours after Alchera. After the crew was disbanded and Jeff grounded, you started taking all the missions no one wanted. Some might even call them suicide missions. When Shepard came back she didn't have clearance anymore to check them and Anderson wouldn't give your status away."
"But you were on authorized leave and being a doctor had access." He understood where this was going.
She nods "Do you know why I signed on with Anderson so many times? Why I rejoined Shepard after two years?"
Kaidan shakes his head. The idea that Shepard had seen his mission reports after her death and had never said anything made him feel almost guilty. God only knew what they had put in his psy eval after everything. He had never discussed with her that time in his life other than lashing out on Horizon.
And she had never asked. Because she had known and knew you wouldn't want to tell her.
He shakes his head in reply to her question.
"I have been in the AS longer than you have been alive. I have seen more than my fair share of Captain's who take their crew for granted. Anderson and then Shepard treat them the same way I do. Treats us as family. That is a rare gift in times like these Kaidan. She, Joker, even you when you were rushed into Huerta and I took transport over to check on you. You are like my family." She pauses to give him a smile. "So consider me breaking her patient confidentiality an even trade."
She gives his arm a reaffirming pat before she exits. Glancing at her terminal he is not surprised to see Shepard's file info unlocked on her terminal. Shaking his head he uploads it onto his omni. Kaidan is seriously beginning to wonder if every woman on this ship is batty.
I am gonna have to start avoiding Gabby too. Who knows what craziness she can do.
Exiting the Medbay Kaidan is not very surprised to see the crew deck deserted. They had been docked about a half hour and most of the thin crew had made their way out the airlock to enjoy their unexpected free day. He checks his messages quick and concludes he has some free time himself. He is surprised to hear Shepard and Traynor's voices coming from the cockpit.
"No no. Absolutely not!"
"Oh come on Commander it is not …THAT bad." Traynor's voice indicating whatever IT was clearly was THAT bad.
Joker chimes in, his voice chocked from laughed.
"Hell I like it!"
"YOU would! I look like an officer's bachelor party. I knew it wouldn't work. I blame you two mother hens for feeding HIS fetishes." Shepard points an indignant finger at Joker.
"Maybe you are just feeding into mine and Liara's." The Specialist countered.
What the hell did I just overhear?
Kaidan changes course and heads for the already crowed bridge to see Joker's shoulders shaking, his face buried in his arms to hide the laughter. Liara and Samantha wedged in EDI's corner console and Shepard with her back to him in what looked like a mismatched set of dress blues.
"Shepard I just thought it would be a good idea to meet with Counselors dressed the part." Liara trying to be the peace keeper as always.
"Well then maybe we should have had the Broker track me down clothes that FIT! And why did you have your dress uniform in your footlocker anyway? Didn't you tell me you didn't even have a toothbrush?!" Shepard almost growled at the two who dissolved into giggles.
"Playing dress up how you four plan on spending your shore leave?" Kaidan tries his best innocent voice as he rounds the airlock doors.
No one falls for it. Shepard is trying desperately to right the uniform that fits awkwardly in all the wrong places and the two women have tears of laughter welled up in their eyes that could very well cause their deaths as soon as Shepard recovers herself. Joker just enjoying the whole affair gives Kaidan his infamous lopsided grin. And if Kaidan didn't know better he would say the tips of Shepard's ears were just starting to turn pink again.
Stepping around Shepard Kaidan got the visual that had so clearly distressed the Commander and made the other three dissolve into tears. Shepard at least had the common sense to know that Traynor's dress pants would not fit her wider hips or shorter legs but she had attempted the jacket with slightly more success.
Being wider in the shoulder and more muscular the top of Traynor's jacket would not close fully around Shepard's chest and had an unintended compressing effect that the material clearly was not designed for. Far be it for Kaidan to complain about the state of Shepard's breasts it was not the professional look of an Alliance Officer.
"Listen Asari unlike you fem fatales not everything human's wear need to be skin tight. I would be better off wearing his uniform!" Shepard hooks a finger at Joker.
"Mine would be closer if you were concerned about the bars and stars. Mad'am." Trying to keep his voice level took more effort than Kaidan would have liked to admit. So did moving his gaze up to look Shepard in the eye.
"Then I will look like I am wearing a dress!" She eyes him as she thinks that over. A second later she shakes her head." No that wouldn't do either. This is just a waste of time."
With one motion Shepard undoes the few buttons and hands the jacket back to Sam. Deciding it was best they save further wraith from the Commander she and Liara take their leave. The three remaining Alliance personal wait until they go. With an expectant hand out to Joker Shepard dares him to make a smart ass comment. With a dejected sigh Joker hands back over her hoodie.
"If those two don't get together already and get all their female-ing out of their system I might have to hide in cargo hold." She groused, only half joking.
"Them? It was your females just peeking out in my cockpit …Commander." Joker had a death wish.
"Thank gods for sports bras and under armor then." She folded her arms across her chest regardless. "That does not change the fact that I am ordering you off the ship Joker."
"Shepard it is one day. I can handle it." He protested.
"Jeff don't argue with me for once. Take it as an order, you know like from a Commanding Officer. You need a day away from thinking about Tiptree. I don't care if EDI has to carry you over her shoulder to the Blasto movie you two are going to be outside the hanger."
"Alright Mom." He sounds sulky but he gives Kaidan a wink as if Shepard wouldn't see. But she was already turning on him.
"And you. What are you still doing aboard that you got to so accidently walk into that bit of ridiculousness?"
"Me? I was gonna ask you if you wanted to catch Blasto IV. I hear all the cool couples are seeing it today."
And with that all three of them dissolved into laughter at the sheer absurdity of their dysfunctional family.