A/N: I want to say thank you to all the great reviewers. You all really push me onward in getting new chapters up! -R

Severus reared backward as he snapped into his mind. The last thing he could recall was the light racing towards him followed by a deep roar. He had braced himself, ready to take whatever it would give him.

As the disorientation started to abate he was suddenly aware of the burning against his arm. He hissed ripping his wand from his sleeve his eyes catching sight of the girl behind it.

"Granger..." Her eyes were open now staring straight ahead, glassy, like death.

He dropped his wand onto the lounge reaching forward. Her skin was still warm, he leaned down pressing his ear to her heart.

"No, don't you dare..." The words left his mouth of their own volition, he scrambled to find his wand.

Suddenly, she took in a great breath, arching off the lounge. He stilled his hand over his wand watching as her eyes slowly came back into focus before sliding closed.

He searched all over her face before finally landing on her ear. He furrowed his brows as he leaned in closer. A black liquid was starting to sliding down from inside. It wasn't blood, or at least it wasn't her blood but other than that he was at a loss. He quickly pulled the vial from his pocket, whispering a cleaning charm before pressing into the black liquid. It went in like tar slowly filling the small vial, his eyes shot back to her face, she was breathing calmly as if she were merely asleep, he pulled it back stoppering it. He would examine it later.

His breathing was making him light headed as he turned his attention fully back to the woman prone before him. She was alive...or at least some semblance of it.

He took a few deep breaths to keep himself from blacking out, a searing pain echoing through his skull made him grind his teeth.

"Open your eyes..." He whispered ignoring his own pain, he leaned forward gently cradling her head,

The ticking of the clock became deafening as he waited, his heart sunk down with each passing second.

Come back to me...

His sadness was slowly turning to anger, his grip tightened fractionally as the seconds continued to tick by.

"Mmmm...?"

His heart skipped, surely he'd imagined it, his brain was pulsing threatening to tear his skull asunder.

"Se...v'rus...?

Hermione. His jaw was clenched too tight to form her name, though it had bravely attempted to pass through.

A growing smile drew lazily over her lips and her head turned slightly into his hand. Her beautiful honey hued eyes revealed themselves and her smile grew even more.

"You said my name..." Her voice was low as if she'd woken from a deep sleep.

Snape shook his head in denial, a bit taken aback by her sudden spring back into life.

Hermione felt his hands pull back and slowly shifted onto her side her smile never faulting, "Yes you did... I heard you..."

Severus clenched his jaw even tighter, how dare she scare him like that! His lip curled and he gave her a look that would have sent even the Dark Lord fleeing from his presence.

Hermione didn't even notice. Her smile continued to grow like the cat who caught the canary. She leaned away from the chair but didn't dare touch him as she tried to catch his piercing eyes.

"Say it again...please..."

Severus was seething but her soft plea was strumming against his heart like an expert violinist.

Hermione watched him silently rage, his lips parting slightly before snapping shut again. He looked like he was just about to give in when the back door opened.

He stood so fast his jacket tail actually brushed against her cheek. Hermione let out a deep groan and flopped back against the lounge cursing whoever had stolen the moment.

Severus gave one glance to Minerva as she came in, the apology on her lips dying as she caught sight of him. He said nothing pushing past her and up the stairs, dramatically shutting the door to his room with a loud bang.

Minerva blinked before cautiously coming into the sitting room, she looked at the woman furiously palming at her eyes.

"Did I interrupt something?" She asked warily, coming around the edge of his chair.

Hermione let out a soft groan letting her hands fall back down to her sides, with a dramatic sigh she turned her head towards the woman whom she knew meant well.

"He said it."

"Said what dear?" Minerva came to sit in the chair the man had so hastily vacated.

"My name. My first name." She sighed pouting at the ceiling.

Minerva's brows rose into her graying hairline.

"Not out loud...sort of...between our connection..." She tried to explain rubbing at her temple.

"And..."

"I asked him to say it again." She waved towards the ceiling before letting out another soft groan rubbing her eyes with her fingers. Her head hurt.

"Oh dear-"

"You don't understand..." She growled slightly pushing herself up a bit more, "He's...different some how..." Her face pinched as she tried to cycle through that morning.

"Yes, I did notice a change in him this morning, he seemed almost..."

"Happy?" Hermione finished turning to look at Minerva a sadness filling her eyes.

"Not exactly the word I would have chosen..." Minerva watched the girl fall. She gave her a caring smile lightly patting the back of her hand. "What happened?"

"Just now...or...?" Hermione shifted her position, her head was making her nauseous.

"Start at the beginning, when did you notice...this change?" Her curiosity bleeding through.

Another pause, her mind felt... clearer somehow, like it was easier to think; like she wasn't trudging through mud for each and every thought.

"It's been slow... but...I feel like yesterday was the tipping point..." She swallowed adjusting herself so she didn't expel her breakfast all over the woman's beautiful robes. "Ever since yesterday, he's been... I don't know..." She searched for the proper words.

"What happened yesterday?" Minerva gently guided, watching the younger woman's face search.

"We went to Malfoy Manor..." She slowly recounted their research and their theories in brief detail.

"He let me sleep against his shoulder, and I swear his hand held mine..." She looked down at her palm remembering how it had felt then, not disclosing that he'd actually held her hand just before she took the potion. Minerva had remained silent letting the woman run through her emotions.

"Then...we came home, he sent me to bed..." She smirked a bit, "When I woke...he got a little angry because...I was on the stairs..." She glanced at the woman about to respond, "He'd told me not to take them alone." She added before taking a slow breath looking toward them, "But, even when he lashed out, his tone...it was different...like, he was angry because I wasn't safe or like..."

"He was worried about you?"

"Yeah..." Hermione curled her lips in as she suddenly realized what had sent the man running upstairs. She felt exceedingly guilty in that moment and lowered her eyes to her lap.

Minerva took a slow breath, "What happened next?" She could tell there was so much more to the story and with all the kindness in her heart she desperately wanted to bring comfort to the two broken souls she had come to care for.

"He...made me lunch," She skipped over the mundane her eyes widening as she remembered what she had done to him next. A slow blush grew over her cheeks. "I uh...I..." She blinked as the image of his body came rushing back into her mind clear as if she were seeing it again right in front of her. " I made his clothes vanish..." She hid her embarrassment in her hands hiding away until a soft chuckle came from her left.

"All of them?" Minerva couldn't hold back her mirth as she tried to imagine what the girl clearly could.

"Oh my God! No!" She squeaked even more embarrassed. "Just his coat and shirt..." She peeked out from behind her fingers as the laughter beside her grew.

"If I had known all it would've taken for that stubborn man to loosen up was to remove his damnable frock coat I would have stripped him down ages ago!"

Hermione tried to share in her humor but found she just felt offended by the statement. She made a bit of a face remembering all those dark lines. Any mirth that had been developing died instantly with that image. A new feeling taking its place. It tasted bitter against her tongue.

Minerva felt the mood in the room shift and quickly stifled herself. "I'm sorry dear...what happened after that?"

Hermione glanced at the woman before shaking her head. She had been wanting to share but now, she felt nothing but respect for the man's overwhelming pursuit of solitude. It was then that she identified the taste in her mouth. Betrayal.

Hermione turned away from her former head of house, sure of only one thing. This woman, this kind caring woman, had no understanding of what had made the man upstairs who he was and subsequently couldn't understand why he had become what he had. She realized, that she too, fell into that category. She needed more, no, she wanted more. More of him, she had felt his pain, she could understand his struggle. But she had been thinking of herself and her needs, but now, it was time to return the favor. She knew, that only she could possibly empathize, even the elder witch had no idea of what he was and she could assume she had a lot longer to have figured him out. She felt angry and sad, but mostly protective. Protective of him. She turned her piercing gaze to the witch.

Minerva's eyes widened as she looked right into the trademarked face of the man upstairs. Draco had been right. She watched the girl stand and only gave a small nod to her rambled excuse for departure.

Hermione took the stairs hastily tripping slightly at the very top. Her stomach rolled in protest and she had to swallow down the bile that had risen. She straightened herself in front of his door taking a cathartic breath before trying the handle.

It was locked. Hermione raised her hand to knock before she remembered she had her wand. She turned looking into her pockets, where had she put it? She gasped softly as it came flying up the stairs. She caught it centimeters from her head before rolling the cool wood in her fingertips. Looking back to the door she pulled up all her courage.

A small swish and flick released the lock and she moved quickly lest he lock it again. She pushed the door wide stepping into the room. Her eyes fell on him instantly. Standing at the window his back rigid as he looked out into the front lawn. She felt a tremble of mixed emotions roll through her before slipping her wand into her back pocket.

Every logical synapse in her brain was screaming at her run in retreat. Her Lionheart, however, pushed her forward. She slowly pulled the door closed behind her, not wanting anything they were about to say to reach unwanted ears.

Hermione stepped forward as if she were navigating a mine field, her eyes never leaving the dark shadow. When she came within three steps she paused coming out so she could see the side of his face.

She wanted to cry for him. Everything in his face, in his posture, screamed out to her a man in great distress. What hurt, even more, was that she was the cause. Her breath shuddered as she came closer.

Now a hairs width away from his side, she wrapped her fingers against his taut hand. She watched his face as she forced her fingers between his, taking a firm hold. Still, he refused to see her, she moved even closer, coming between him and the window her eyes searching for his.

"Forgive me..." She whispered, holding his hand tighter.

"Severus," Dark eyes pierced her core, "Please...Let me in..." She pleaded her eyes locked with his. She felt his hand tighten as the world spun away.

Hermione barely had time to register the shift before she was suddenly careening down into a memory. She gasped as she found herself face first in a muddy field. She pushed herself up her eyes going wide. She was standing in the center of a ritual circle, surrounded by men and women in black robes their faces shielded by silver and bone masks. She heard a commotion behind her and turned to find a man tied to a stake a bag over his head. Heart thumping in her ears she desperately searched for Severus.

"My loyal followers, I have called you here tonight for a very special occasion."

Hermione turned watching what she guessed to be the leader come into the circle, she rushed out the way of his dramatic entrance turning back when she saw another being lead in, their face was down so she couldn't see, but she recognized the blond hair that slipped out from the sides of the hood of one of the bringers.

They led the center man to his knees before their leader. Hermione gasped as they pulled back his hood.

"Ah, Severus, you have come at last."

"It is an honor to serve you, my Lord."

He was young, Hermione would guess maybe 20 years old. His hair was a bit longer, sweeping just below his shoulders, his eyes held no lines of tension, his cheeks smooth and his lips, though still thin, we're fuller as he must not have made the habit of pursing them yet. He wouldn't have been called handsome but he did have a sort of Victorian charm. Hermione's eyes snapped to the man now struggling anew at the stake.

The Dark Lord just smiled a warped sense of care on his face as he bid for Severus to rise. He then led him over whispering into his ear before standing back like a ring master in a circus throwing up his arms and smiling with great glee.

"We are joined here tonight to initiate one of our own, as a special treat, I have so graciously chosen our sacrifice for tonight."

Hermione held her breath as the evil man moved over to the stake, with a sharp pull he removed the sack that had been over the struggling man's head. Hermione covered her mouth as her eyes shot back to Severus for his reaction.

His younger-self had looked shocked for only a second before quickly pulling himself in, the ring master just chuckled smiling wider as those of his circle joined in.

"Why I do believe you are aware of who our guest is tonight." It was dripping with sarcasm as he swept behind Severus, "Do enlighten your superiors." He grinned against the boy's ear stepping back for Severus to take center stage.

"He's my father." His voice was low but it seemed enough for the Dark Lord.

"Give them a wonderful show." Voldemort flicked his wand releasing the silencing spell.

"You sniveling son of a-"

The man's tirade was cut short as Severus's wand shot out, the torturing curse flying effortlessly from his lips.

Hermione closed her eyes tight covering her ears against the man's screams.

"Sectumsempra!"

A new round of screams rocked her frame, she struggled inside herself before forcing her eyes open. She had asked for this. She had pleaded with him to show her. Her face went tight and her arms wrapped around her stomach threatening her ribs integrity. She had wanted to see. She would watch it all.

The more the man would scream, the louder the laughter would become from the outer ring. It made the world tilt on its end and she struggled to keep her focus.

"Finish it, Become one of your brothers!" The snake like man hissed holding Severus' shoulders in a mockery of care. "You don't need him anymore," His voice was just for Severus now but Hermione could hear his devil tongue so clearly as if he was right next to her ear. "You have us, and that's all you'll ever need. We're your family now, we'll protect you from harm, and raise your honor higher than it has ever been...Finish it..."

Hermione shook her head, she knew what the devil was asking and even after what she had seen in the brief glimpse into his father's treatment of his son, she didn't believe he deserved to die, not this way...

"Useless...coward..."

"Avada Kadavra!"

The crowd roared with excitement as the green light shot out from the tip of Severus' wand. Hermione forced herself not to look away but couldn't keep her eyes from shutting at the last moment.

"Ahhaha well done! Severus kneel before me and take your mark and fully become one of us!"

Hermione watched through her fingers at the masked pain on the younger Severus' face, she knew as much as he did that there was no turning back. Tears fell freely from her eyes as she watched him take the place at the feet of his new master.

The Dark Lord pulled out his wand taking hold of Severus' exposed forearm and pressed the tip in sharply, "This sins of the father, are no more."

Hermione grimaced as the new mark burned itself into the soft flesh of youth and she felt the world starting to spin on its axis as the memory started to shift.

Her breathing had barely come down as the new scene melted into place, she held her head blinking in the dim light of a sitting room. Her eyes went to a woman, her long black hair neatly pulled back, half up in a braid down her back. She stood as stiff as she had ever seen when footsteps came from the entrance. Hermione turned slowly watching a proud looking Severus came into the room. His chest was high but his eyes, they shined deeply with something else. Hermione watched him approach, he seemed wary now, a bit on edge, a childlike want in his features as he waited for her to acknowledge him.

"What have you done?" His mother's voice was cold and sharp as she turned her own piercing eyes onto his soul.

His eyes looked down briefly in shame before he pulled himself straighter meeting her piercing stare with one of his own.

Severus yanked up his jacket showing off his fresh mark, no more than three days old, to his mother. He went still, waiting for all he had ever sought from the woman; approval.

She ascetic woman cast her eyes down a slip of emotion falling over her eyes. She raised them to her son's eager and waiting face.

"Oh, Severus..." She shook her head turning her head away, denying him what he so eagerly sought after. The room turned cold. Severus' face twisted as he tried to understand.

"I did this for you! To bring honor back to our name!" His voice cracked with emotion as he fell to one knee before her, looking up with such loss, such pain.

"Oh, Severus, this is not how you bring honor." There was so much disappointment in his mother's voice as she turned toward him again, looking down with disgust at the mark that was still very raw against his arm.

The young man roared with rage, snarling through his teeth, his hands came into his hair pulling harshly on the sides before something seemed to snap. His face twitched, a mask of suppressed anger and apathy slowly falling into place. His eyes looked into his mother's face one last time before he brought himself up, his mouth opened but the woman raised her hand.

"Go." She crossed her arms over her chest watching him from the corner of her eye, "Never. Return."

Hermione felt all the air leave her lungs as the memory started to swirl out again. Her soul was crying out in agony against the world. Had anyone...anyone at all, ever loved this man?

More gently this time, the world around her started to grow bright, a soft summer sun shone over head and she hastily wiped away the tears that were falling steadily down her face.

"Come on Severus hurry up!" The voice was female and young, maybe 13 or 14. A smiling red head appeared just over a berm Her long red hair flying carelessly in the wind. Hermione instantly recognized her from his dream, Lily, he had called her.

"Wait up! This bag is heavy!" Severus appeared next, a careful smile on his young face, he had become rather thin and lanky from his growth spurt and he seemed to have a bit of a coordination issue with his long legs. Over his shoulder he carried a duffle bag, it clanked with something heavy inside. Lily turned to giggle at him waving him towards a thicket of trees. "Come on you're going to love it I promise!" She ducked down as she moved into a small opening.

Severus tread past Hermione as he let out a soft laugh of his own. It was surreal to see a happy look on his face, after all she had just witnessed. Hermione sniffled staying behind him as he crawled into the trees next. " Where are you?" He had a bit of trouble fitting in through the hole.

"Don't tell me you've forgotten the way!" Lily teased from somewhere off to his right. "This is your secret base remember?" She giggled again as she seemed to stop having gotten to her location.

"Yeah when I was like 10," Severus grumbled softly, though his words held no heat to them.

Severus rounded the edge into a small clearing dropping the bag down. He smiled down at her as she laid spread out on a pile of leaves. She took a small handful and tossed them right in his face.

Hermione instinctively stepped to the side as a fight of leaves started to take place. Despite the pain in her soul, she felt their happiness, their youth, filling inside her. She very much wanted nothing more in that moment than to join in on their fun. She looked briefly around her before looking back at the two teens. Lily had apparently won the battle. She was sitting over his stomach her hands raised high with a handful of leaves. Severus for all the world, didn't seem to mind the oncoming loss.

"I have something for you." She waved the leaves teasingly overhead.

Severus shielded his face but a grin could be seen under his arm. "I don't particularly care for foliage." He teased, sputtering out a laugh as Lilly promptly thromped him.

They both let out a small giggle before Lily pulled herself off his stomach helping him up. She chuckled more as she pulled a stubborn leaf from his hair.

"It's even better, I promise." She gave him a bright smile moving up onto her knees before she pulled something from her pocket.

Hermione moved in closer, taking in a sharp breath as two rings glowed softly in her palm. One gold, one silver, one small, one large. Lily pulled the silver one from her palm holding it up.

Severus looked more than afraid as she motioned for his hand. Reluctantly, he acquiesced watching the smooth band move over his middle finger. A soft green light glowed forming the word, 'Always.' He looked at her in confusion as she slipped her own on, a soft red light forming a matching set.

"A promise." She said proudly setting her hand next to his, "To always be best friends, to help and protect each other."

Hermione covered her mouth as a new set of tears washed down her face. The memory started to swirl out as Lily gave him a tight hug around his neck.

A new series of images flashed forward spinning in and out as if their owner had lost control of his thoughts. Hermione watched helplessly as they started then changed before her.

"I don't need your help, you filthy mudblood."

Betrayal.

"Please forgive me..."

Lament.

"Hide them, hide them all..."

Penance.

"No one can know..."

Bravery.

"You've been raising him like a pig for slaughter!"

Loyalty.

"Don't call me a COWARD!"

Trepidation.

"Take them..."

Acceptance.

"Severus she needs you..."

Love...

Hermione felt herself falling as the memories slowed to a stop the last voice wasn't his own but it was powerful.

The world around her came into focus again and she could feel his hand in hers once more. Her eyes opened next, slowly and wet with tears. She took in a shaking breath as she raised them up. It was so clear now, everything that had made him, was shining in those deep obsidian eyes. Her hand slowly left his joining its mate to gently cup his face. She knew what he had expected of her in that moment. She could see it forming in his eyes as he prepared himself. It wasn't something she was going to give him. No, she was going to exceed his expectations, one more time.

Her thumb lightly traced the underside of his lip as she raised herself up, her eyes partly closed as she pressed her lips gently to the corner of his. It wasn't a lover's kiss, no, it was the kiss of someone who was completely and unquestioningly accepting all of him. Without fear. Without reservation. Without judgement.