Chapter 155 - Acquired Taste

By the time Kumori was four years old, Hajime and Ninako had worked out an alternating schedule of sorts that would allow them time with their son and with each other. They always had Sundays off together, but everything else was carefully balanced so that Kumori always had at least one parent home to be with.

On the days when this simply wasn't possible, or when Hajime and Ninako needed some time to themselves, Kumori was usually left at Nadeshiko's, just down the road. Takeru, the usual babysitter, had become unavailable since he moved permanently to Sand - yes, he was indeed qualified to be Leaf's Ambassador - and Nadeshiko didn't mind looking after her nephew at all. His time at her house was spent learning the names and the smells of the flowers in her garden, and listening to stories.

Things would be easier once Kumori turned five and was thus safely kept at school for most of the day, allowing his parents to not only have consistent work, but to work together for the first time in years.

(Hanabi had, in her usual way, reinterpreted a previous ruling, rather than rewriting it, since to rewrite would be to admit she'd ruled wrongly in the past.)

(Which, as clan head, she obviously was incapable of doing.)

(Her claim was that her decree for Hajime and Ninako were never to work together again was regarding to that very specific job in the Curse Seal Program. It had absolutely nothing to do with their present positions, still in the Curse Seal Program, but in a different department.)

(Hanabi eventually learned to be more subtle.)

But until then, turns were taken. And while it was good for Ninako - she avoided any separation from her son that lasted more than a day - it wore heavily on Hajime, who tended to lose himself in his work, and often brought paperwork home to finish in the kitchen.

Hajime tolerated it, as was his nature, but his sleep schedule began to suffer, and he found himself sleeping late into his days off with Kumori, having stayed up all night to finish the work he'd brought home the day before. Kumori, who was a bright little child, taught himself how to make toast or milk and cereal, and patiently sat in the living room with the television on, waiting for his father to wake up.

Of course, once Ninako found out this was happening, she did something about it. And as far as talking to Hajime about it, she gently asked him not to work himself so hard on the days when he was on duty, because she was worried about his health.

"I'm fine," he replied, then. "I know my limits."

Of course, it took a bit of a shock for Hajime to understand what, exactly, he was doing.

That was where Sasuke came in.

The whole thing came to a head on yet another one of Hajime's overspent nights. He came home from work late, long after even Ninako had gone to bed, and ate some leftovers without really tasting them before taking to his paperwork. The sun was coming up by the time he finished, and he collapsed into bed beside Ninako after taking off everything but his underwear.

When he finally woke up, some hours later, Kumori was nowhere to be found in the house.

His panic was slow to come over him, since he was still fairly groggy, but it sharpened as he became more fully awake, and his heart began to race.

Since he doubted he could reach Ninako at the Curse Seal Program Offices, he reached out to the next logical choice.

Nadeshiko? Is Kumori at your house?

Nadeshiko took a mercifully quick time to answer. I'm at work, Hajime. I believe he's staying with Mother, at her house.

Hajime was getting his shoes on. I'm going over to check.

He didn't bother knocking as he entered his mother's house. "Mom? Is Kumori here?"

Ino came out of the kitchen, drying off her hands with a dishcloth. "Hajime? Why, yes, of course he is."

"When did he come over?"

"Oh, earlier this morning," Ino said. "Ninako said it was okay."

"When did she say that?"

"She worked it out with us a few weeks ago. You've been so busy lately at work that she told Kumori to come to us if you were too tired to look after him."

Even though she didn't mean it that way in the slightest, the words hit him like an insult. "Well, she, um… didn't tell me about that. At all."

"Oh, I thought she did," Ino said. "You'll have to talk to her about it."

"Yeah, I will," Hajime said. "Where is Kumori now?"

"He's with your father in the living room," Ino replied. Her voice softened, seeing something in Hajime's face. "Is that okay?"

"Just let me take him home," Hajime said.

"Well… you know where the living room is," Ino said, stepping aside.

Sasuke was reading to his grandson, on the couch, from the Monkey King book. Kumori leaned against his grandfather's arm, tucked into his knees, his head tilted slightly up as he listened.

"...and so, he hopped up onto the cloud, and it carried him away as light as a feather," Sasuke read, and turned the page.

"Gampa?" Kumori said.

"Hm?"

"So, you said earlier, Goku, he's-a made of stone, yeah?"

Sasuke tilted his head to look down. "What makes you say that?"

"He was, uh, born from a stone. A stone egg."

"Ah, yes, in the beginning," Sasuke said.

"So, uh, how come… how come he can float on a cloud? 'Cos stones are heavy. They don't float."

"Hm. I honestly don't know," Sasuke said. "Then again, Goku doesn't seem to follow many rules."

"Nuh-uh." Kumori shook his head. He paused, thinking. "I'm not made-a stone."

"No, you certainly are not."

"But if I sat on a cloud, I'd still sink."

"Most likely." Sasuke was chuckling a little, now, and adjusted the book in his lap. "Shall we continue?"

"Yup. Sorry for in… inner-hopting." Kumori furrowed his brow as he remembered the word.

"What a big word!" Sasuke said. "Where did you learn it?"

"Listenin' to the TV."

"I see, I see," Sasuke said. "Well, it's all right if you interrupt. Asking questions is good for your brain."

Hajime finally entered the room, here, unable to stand any more. "Kumori? What are you doing here?"

Kumori broke into a wide smile. "Daddy! You're awake!" He clambered off of Sasuke's lap and ran to his father, arms spread out for a hug.

Hajime picked him up, but didn't smile back. "When did you come over here?"

"After breakfast. You were still sleepin' and 'cos Mommy said it was okay, I walked to Gamma and Gampa's."

"You walked all by yourself?"

"Yeah. I know the way." Kumori frowned when he didn't receive an answer. "Daddy, are you angry?"

"No, I'm not angry, Kumori," Hajime said. "I was just a little… scared when I couldn't find you."

"M'sorry, Daddy," Kumori said.

"It's all right, Kumori. I'll take you home now."

"Okay, lemme get my book!" He wiggled in Hajime's arms and was put down, and he wandered over to Sasuke, his hands out.

"Here you go," Sasuke said, pressing the spine into his palms.

Kumori held the book to his chest. "Bye-bye, Gampa. Thanks for readin' to me."

"You're welcome," Sasuke replied. "I'll see you later."

His eyes met with Hajime's, but Hajime said nothing to him. "Come on, Kumori, let me carry you home."

"Okay," Kumori said, letting his father take him. They left the house without another word, not even to Ino.

When they were almost halfway there, Kumori lifted his head from Hajime's shoulder and spoke. "Daddy, are you for real not mad at me?"

"Kumori, I am not mad at you," Hajime said. "I'm just… worried. You shouldn't be walking out all by yourself."

"But I know the way," Kumori said. "For real, Daddy."

"And what if you tripped and fell, and hurt yourself? Who would help you?"

"Gamma an' Gampa, or Aunt Nadeshiko," Kumori said. "But I don' ever trip, an' I know the way…"

Hajime grumbled a little. "Kumori, if you want to leave the house and visit Grandma, can you please not go off on your own like that?" he said. "Wait until I'm awake."

"Okay, Daddy…" Kumori said. "I'll be real quiet too. I won' even listen to the TV."

Hajime held his son a little tighter as they went along.

He had a discussion with Ninako, after dinner, after Kumori was safely in his room. After all, Kumori wasn't at fault here. But Ninako could be reasoned with.

"So, when did you talk to my mom about Kumori staying with her on my days off?" They were sitting on the couch together, the television on, though Hajime was too tangled in his thoughts to pay attention.

"You mean when you're too passed-out to look after him?" Ninako said. "I went to her a few Sundays ago."

Hajime reached for the remote, and muted the TV.

"Honey, you were basically leaving Kumori alone in the house, I had to do something," Ninako continued. "I mean, unless you start leaving work at work. Like I've been trying to get you to do."

"I have responsibilities," Hajime said, lowly.

"Yeah, and so do I, but you don't see me sleeping my days off," Ninako said. "Besides, you have me here. You don't have to do everything by yourself."

Hajime sighed, and turned the TV off. "Wasn't there anyone else you could have talked to? Gotten her to come over instead of having Kumori have to… walk over there all by himself?"

"I tell him to use the phone to call Ino and have her pick him up," Ninako said. "Believe me, I know that your parents' place isn't that far away, but I don't like him walking off on his own either!"

Hajime rubbed his temple, sighing again. "Why couldn't you have talked to me about this?"

"I tried, Hajime, but you weren't listening," she said. "And honestly, did I really have a choice? Your parents agreed with me."

"You talked to my dad too?"

"Well of course I did, Hajime," she said. "I mean, it's not fair to assume Ino should take care of anything. He actually came up with the idea when I went to go talk to them about it."

Hajime made a bitter sort of laugh in his voice. "I don't know whether or not to be surprised. I bet it's because he wants to… micromanage his training or something. He's not even in school yet…"

"Hajime!" She nudged him somewhat roughly. "Isn't that a little unfair?"

"It's not unfair when I know how he works," Hajime said. "He already had expectations of me when I was Kumori's age. I can tell it's only a matter of time now."

"Oh, you're just assuming," Ninako said. "I mean, have you seen how he actually is with Kumori? He's an utter lamb."

"You don't know what he's capable of. I don't want Kumori to be hurt." Hajime leaned forward against his knees. "And to be honest, the less time my father gets with him, the better."

"Well, that's awful selfish of you!" Ninako said.

"It might be selfish, but it's for Kumori's sake," Hajime said. "If I… give him enough time, then who the hell knows what kind of… poison he could tell our son? I'm his father, not him!"

"Oh, I see what this is about," Ninako said, shaking her head.

"And what is this about?"

"Since I've heard that story before about how your dad used to be, you're totally scared of your dad replacing you because you don't have the time for Kumori."

"I never said that!"

"Lemme repeat for you? 'I'm his father, not him'? Exactly what you said," Ninako said. Hajime sighed in reply, and she continued. "Look, I know you have a lot on your plate right now, with work, but unless you make the time to be a dad, then this is how it's gotta be."

"Ninako, stop it."

"You can't deny it, Hajime. Am I gonna have to start giving you a bedtime?" she said. "What's going on is you're being irresponsible and you're setting the bar way too high at work. I've told you this time and again, and you've gotta listen to me. All right?"

Hajime groaned and lay back against the couch.

"Now if you'll excuse me, since there's only so many times I can repeat myself, I'm gonna go to bed, and I'm not letting you in until you've had some time to clear your head." Ninako got up off the couch. "And I'll talk to Kumori about not walking to your parents' house alone in the morning."

Hajime allowed himself to thoroughly stew in the living room, for several minutes after Ninako left, because that was the least she deserved.

His worry was legitimate, he knew. She didn't know his father like he did. And Kumori was at a dangerous age, the age where Hajime began to remember things, and the bad memories began to outnumber the good.

Hajime wished that he could give his father the benefit of the doubt. But he knew too well.

Once enough time had passed and his head had cooled a little, Ninako's advice was far more palatable, and he rubbed his forehead in protest against his stubbornness. When he went to his bedroom, the door was closed, so he knocked a little.

"Yes?" she said within.

"If I bring home any paperwork tomorrow you have my permission to slap me."

He heard her footsteps, and she opened the door for him. "Good. Come to bed."

It took a great deal of effort not to go about his work as usual, the next day; it felt natural to volunteer for every, tiny task, and oversee everything in his department personally. But at the end of the day, there was nothing extra to take home, and Ninako's smile was triumphant when she greeted him home.

Still, Hajime felt the need to confirm some things. And as he tucked Kumori in that night, after reading to him, he couldn't help himself in speaking. "So, tomorrow, I'm going to be up nice and early, and we'll have a lot of time together. You won't have to go to Grandma."

"Really, Daddy?" Kumori said. "But if you're sleepy, you should sleep."

"Don't worry, Kumori, I'll get enough sleep," he said. "But if you wake up and I'm still not out of bed, you can wake me up, okay?"

"Okay…" The boy didn't seem convinced. "I jus' don' wanna wake you up if you still gotta sleep. I try to be real quiet, Daddy."

"You are quiet, Kumori, but you don't need to worry about that," Hajime said. "I'm going to try and be around a lot more."

"Can I still see Gampa sometimes?" Kumori said.

"…now, why would you say that?" Hajime said.

"Well, 'cos, Mommy said today that you don't like me goin' over and that I should, uh, ask you if I wanna visit." He shifted uneasily in his bed. "I like when Gampa reads to me. And Gamma gives me cookies."

(What took his parents a good while to figure out was that Kumori had a great natural talent for sensing the subtlest shifts in chakra, and that included anything to do with emotion. He was a good listener, and a bright child, to be sure, but there was far more to it than that.)

"…I like it when, um, you read to me even more, Daddy," he continued. "Gampa doesn't do voices like you or Mommy."

"Ah, is that so," Hajime said. "Well, then… I will do a lot more voices for you next time I read you a story."

"Okay," Kumori said.

"Now, let's tuck you in, and I'll see you bright and early in the morning." Hajime reached for his blankets, and kissed Kumori on the head.

"Night-night, Daddy."

"Goodnight, son."

Hajime kept himself from asking Ninako about what, exactly, she'd discussed with their son, as he got into bed with her. This wasn't the sort of thing he could have an argument over, and he had a feeling he'd lose or end up repeating himself unnecessarily.

The next day was about as fine as it could have been. Hajime, as promised, woke up early and spent much time on stories and television and making lunch, and Kumori seemed happy enough with what they got together. And the days continued, as scheduled, and Hajime tried not to work too hard, since that, at least, he could control.

But sure enough, there came a day when he came home, and found that Kumori was not with Ninako. "He's… with your parents," she reluctantly admitted, when he asked. "He insisted."

"Did my mother pick him up?"

"I dropped him off. I told him you'd be by to pick him up before dinner." She paused. "Will you?"

"Of course." Hajime was well-practiced at hiding disappointment, or fear.

And exactly as he expected, Kumori was with Sasuke when he came to call, a good long while before dinner. But instead of immediately collecting his son, he had to set some things straight with his mother. "How long has this been going on?" he whispered, in her kitchen. "This sneaking around. I know what's going on."

"Hajime, he just wants time with his grandson," Ino said.

"Ah, so this is on his terms, is it?"

"No, sweetheart, Kumori always asks for him," Ino said. "And it's only ever for a few hours at a time. Sometimes they go to the movies."

"They go to the-!" Hajime groaned. "Mom!"

"If you have an issue with this, take it up with your father!" Ino said. "Honestly! The way you talk about him, Hajime, it's like you're afraid he'll break Kumori!"

Hajime grumbled a little, and went to get his son from the living room, and spoke no further of it with either his mother or his wife, much less to Sasuke.

Of course, there was only so long that even Hajime could last without saying anything. It was easier to bear when Kumori was small and could not leave the home without accompaniment, but now he was walking alone and forming his own opinions and budding a personality, and as such was even more vulnerable than before.

Hajime had a family, his own family, and he had to set his terms. So on a Sunday afternoon, with Ninako out shopping with Kumori and his mother, Hajime made his way to the old house, and asked Sasuke if they could talk. "Man to man, father to father. All right?"

Sasuke nodded, once, twice. "That's perfectly reasonable. What do you want to discuss?"

Hajime inhaled deeply before continuing. "I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm worried about how you've been acting around my son."

"What, exactly?" Sasuke said. He looked genuinely, if only a little, worried.

"Well… that's the thing. I don't know what, exactly, you're doing, but you're having an effect on him that… worries me."

"Has he been misbehaving?" Sasuke said.

"No, he's been… perfectly well-behaved," Hajime replied. "But he's…" How could he put this without sounding stupid? "I'm beginning to worry that you're starting to replace me in the house."

Sasuke's face curdled a little. "Hajime, there's no way I would ever be able to replace you. You're Kumori's father."

"I'm starting to doubt that," Hajime said. "Ninako's been telling me that on her days off, he's been asking to be with you."

"Well… yes, he has," Sasuke said.

"And that… it tells me that there's something you're doing to him that's making him prefer you to me." That was about as mature as he could make it sound. When dealing with Sasuke, he had to be careful not to look childish at all.

"...is that how it comes off, then?" Sasuke said.

"Just a bit, yeah."

"Ah, well, I'm sorry for that…" Sasuke said. "I haven't heard anything from Kumori to make me feel like he's choosing me over you, though."

"Oh, really. What would make you think that?"

Sasuke shrugged uneasily. "Asking to see me when he's with you, I suppose. Or saying I'm more… 'fun' than you."

"Kumori is four, but I don't think he's that direct," Hajime said. "And since I'm not around, there's no way for me to know. But I have a feeling."

"Mm. Though, Kumori has told me once or twice that he came over because his mother wanted to do something," Sasuke continued. "If you want me to stop seeing Kumori altogether then I can say something to Ninako about it."

And Ninako would not be okay with that, nor would his mother. No matter what Hajime personally wanted. "No, that's not a solution, Dad. If Ninako wants to spend some time out by herself then that's… her business. But I just want to set some things straight about your behavior."

"Absolutely," Sasuke said. "The last thing I want to do is intrude on the way you run your family."

Hajime felt his back stiffen and bristle. "Well, then. Going forward. I don't… want you training Kumori in anything. He isn't even in school yet."

"I wouldn't dream of it," Sasuke said.

"And… and the way you talk to him, don't tell him what he can and cannot do."

"That isn't my business, but I'll keep that in mind. Unless it… has to do with how your mother wants things in her house," he added, almost sheepishly. "She likes her kitchen a certain way."

"That I don't have a problem with," Hajime said. "It's just… things like, telling him what sorts of things he should be doing in his free time, or school things, or…"

(Or basically anything that Sasuke ever said to him, as a child. But the words remained stuck to his teeth.)

"I really don't think I've said anything like that to Kumori, but I'll… keep alert," Sasuke said. "I don't want to be repeating history with him, you know."

Hajime wasn't sure, for a moment, if he'd heard correctly. "Repeating history?" he said, cautiously.

"I know I didn't… do the best job with you, Hajime, and Kumori…" He sighed, lowering his eyes. "The last thing I want is for your relationship with Kumori to be like ours. And I will do anything I can to make sure that never happens."

The sticky words in Hajime's mouth tasted bitter. "You… regret our relationship?"

"There are few things I'm more ashamed of," Sasuke said. "Really, the fact that I tried to disown you alone is…" He sighed again. "I'm more or less a failure, as far as fathers go. The best I can do is work at being a decent grandfather."

"So you… you actually admit that you were a…" Reflex kept him from continuing.

"I was a horrible father, Hajime, you don't have to worry about hurting my feelings," Sasuke said, his face almost stern about it.

"Well, um…" For lack of a better action, Hajime laced his fingers together, tapping his thumbs idly.

"Do you not think I'm being sincere?" Sasuke said.

"It's… well, kinda hard to believe, given our… history, and all," Hajime replied.

Sasuke nodded, mouth pursed in thought. "I don't blame you. I wouldn't believe me, either."

Hajime shook his head a few times. "I'm sorry, it's just, we don't see that much of each other anymore, so when I see you… doing things like reading to Kumori, talking to Nadeshiko… it just doesn't feel like you, and I have a hard time believing you're being… genuine about it."

"Not seeing each other much might have something to do with it," Sasuke said. "I can hardly suppose you trust me with your son if you don't know what sorts of things we do together."

"Maybe some… meetings? Together?" Hajime said. "I mean, you and Mom coming over for dinner, or something. I mean…" He was getting emotional, stupid-emotional, but he couldn't help himself. "I wish I could trust you, Dad, it's just…"

"You don't need to say any more," Sasuke said. "Son, I've done nothing to earn your trust, and I should have made that clear with you before spending time with your son. And until you feel comfortable, I'll keep my distance."

"You don't have to put it so… formally," Hajime said. Even when he was a tyrant, his father was too… logical about things. "It's fine, just… I'll talk to Ninako about it and see if I can bring Kumori over more often. Okay?"

"Fine with me," Sasuke said. Hajime rose, to leave, but he continued, "Though, son?"

"What is it?"

"If you don't mind, we could also meet to talk. One-on-one, like this." Sasuke cleared his throat. "So you can tell me how I'm doing."

"Uh… sure, when are you thinking?" Hajime said.

Sasuke shrugged. "Once a week. After work for you, maybe? I don't want to get in the way."

"I'll… let you know if I figure something out," Hajime said.

"If you don't want to, it's fine," Sasuke said, a little hurriedly. "I just don't want to… overstep boundaries. I'm available, you know."

"Dad, it's okay," Hajime said. "I'll… get back to you on that."

The conversation wrinkled like slightly-wet paper in Hajime's mind as he waited for Ninako to get back from shopping with Kumori, and he smoothed it as he thought.

It was probably the most honest, and most unbelievable conversation he'd ever had with his father. For safety, from history, his gut told him to be careful, to not go too far. With his mother and Ninako there, he felt he might be able to… move forward, or whatever it was.

And while Hajime was aware that his father had reached out and reconnected with Takeru - almost immediately, to nobody's surprise - and to Inou - they met almost every week to discuss work, now - it was the first time his father had ever made an attempt to reach out to him - and apologize! And admit guilt! And all sorts of other impossible things!

...maybe Hajime was holding on to stiff expectations, or maybe he was being just cautious enough. After all, this concerned his son, and his well-being, and his future happiness.

Well, he'd be able to see things through. And besides, Kumori would be in school in a few months, and this wouldn't even be an issue anymore.

He discussed it all with Ninako when she came home, after Kumori had been put to bed. "Ooh, little dinner meetings, huh? So you can see for yourself how nice he is. Sounds fantastic."

"I just don't want my father alone with Kumori just yet," he said, needlessly. She rolled her eyes at him, which confirmed this - she already knew, and probably thought he was being foolish - but at least she didn't tell him so.

The dinners, and later the Sunday afternoons together as couples, were almost therapeutic. Hajime saw, and maybe even believed, that Sasuke truly meant it, that he wasn't just trying to get Kumori on his side, when he was so kind and so gentle with his grandson.

Hajime eventually called him on the telephone, on another absent day, when the girls weren't home. "Hey, Dad. You mind if I take you up on that offer to meet you one on one?"

"Of course, I'd be glad to. Is there anything I've been doing lately that's been bothering you?"

"No, just… man to man. Or, uh, dad to dad. Figure you should know how you're doing."

He could almost hear his father smiling on the other end. "Just tell me when, son."

Hajime never said it out loud, but he stopped thinking of Sasuke as a threat, that day.

Just another father.