AN: SM owns Twilight and the characters contained in this story – I own nothing.
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Warning: If you are still reading by this point...you should know it's not for the young or the faint of heart. Please be forewarned!
Now, on with the story...
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I can't believe this bullshit. It seems like every damn time someone uses something of mine it ends up either ruined or mangled. I know it's not his fault, I mean it's a fucking huge ass wolf on the hood; but still, what are the odds? The odds are really fucked up lately, that's for sure. Bella being a prime example of that very thing.
Rose and Emmett had already left. They were going to search for Bella's truck before meeting us at the house in Montana. Carlisle, Esme, Alice, and Edward had been behind us, however. They got out of their cars and approached the dog cautiously.
"He's telling me to let you know he is coming with us, whether you like it or not," Edward relayed to me.
"Roll the window down, Peter," I told him. He did so and I sighed heavily before addressing the dog.
"Jacob, maybe you are confused about the current situation so let me explain some things to you. You are a werewolf...and we are vampires; mortal enemies and all that shit...and Bella here is a newborn vampire now. Which means that once we get to our destination and I release her, she would be free to tear your furry ass apart...and she wouldn't hesitate, Jacob - trust me on that. Now you can do one of two fucking things right now the way I see it... One, you can turn tail and run back to Sam like a good dog, or two, you can choose to not believe what I'm fucking telling you right now and follow us – only to die a gruesome death by the hands of Bella. How do you think that would make Bella feel, Jacob?" I asked him.
It was clear even after what I had just said that he was still undecided as he stared directly at Bella. Edward didn't look pleased at the direction of his thoughts either. Unfucking believable.
I was quite impressed and shocked at my ability to remain calm through this confrontation. Normally, I'd have had him half disassembled by now. Fortunately or unfortunately, I couldn't do that though because of my mate held in my arms and under my gift. Regardless, she seemed to have her own calming influence over me and even though I really wanted to teach the pup a lesson right now – I was fine simply sitting here with her cradled to my chest. In fact, I would be happy for the rest of eternity if all I could do was hold her this way. My cock bristled at that thought...but it was the truth – as fucked up and pussy-like as it may be.
"Jacob?" Carlisle addressed him gathering his attention away from Bella. "You do know of your rights as a descendant of Ephraim Black, yes?" he asked him.
"He doesn't understand what you are implying," Edward answered.
"As a direct descendant, it is youwho should be Alpha of the pack, Jacob – not Sam," Carlisle explained to him.
"He's aware of that fact, but Sam told him he was too young for the role," Edward relayed.
"That may be but isn't it your destiny to stay here and assume your role as Alpha when the time comes?" Carlisle asked, attempting to reason with him.
"He says he just wants to make sure Bella is going to be okay. He realizes they can't be together because she's a vampire now," Edward replied, rolling his eyes at the suggestion in that last part; I did too. I'm beginning to think I'll need to fight off every goddamn male in a twenty mile radius when it comes to her.
"You have our word that she will not be harmed in any way, Jacob. We simply want to help her adjust to this new life," Carlisle told him sincerely.
Jacob nodded his head gruffly in acceptance, his eyes zeroing in again on Bella briefly before turning and lopping off into the forest. Multiple howls rang out a few moments later, just as a huge black wolf exited the tree line – it was easy to see he was the Alpha as he was flanked by a silver wolf to his right and a tan wolf to his left. They slowly advanced on the Cullens, who had yet to get back into their cars. Their teeth bared as menacing growls and snarls left their mouths. Their intentions were clear; they weren't here to negotiate a deal or give us any more time - our time had run out.
Fuck! How the hell am I going to protect them? I'll have to let her go – it's my only choice. Just as I was about to do that very thing, a russet colored blur flew in front of Sam – blocking his path to the Cullens. The two wolves growled and bared their teeth at one another. Sam trying to order Jacob to stand down, I assumed. When that didn't happen, the fighting began...
It was a showdown between Jacob and Sam then, as the other wolves stood by and watched seemingly in shock.
"Get in the cars! Jacob says he will hold them off!" Edward yelled, dashing to his Volvo. The rest followed suit and Peter put the truck back in gear and we took off without hesitation.
"Jacob," Bella whimpered in my arms.
"Shh, darlin', I'm sure he'll be just fucking fine," I tried to reassure her. I'll admit my heart wasn't into it – I didn't really care what happened to the pup. If he hadn't stopped us, we would have already been gone. Regardless, he apparently mattered to her so that fucking means it matters to me – my pussy transformation officially complete.
"But Charlie," she choked out. If she were able...she would have been crying, and my heart literally ached as my mate cried for her father. He was alive and well, but she'd never be able to see him again. I hope she realizes that...she did try to see him earlier. We'll need to address that more once we get there, just to be sure.
"I know. I'm sorry, Bella," I told her, drawing soothing circles with my thumbs on her smooth skin. Her shirt had ridden up and my hands were now on her bare flesh – a fact that had not gone unnoticed by my cock. He was already working on her invitation to the party he was planning; clothing optional and strongly discouraged.
"Sorry? You're sorry?" she spat at me, her demeanor changing once again to hostile. Well fuck me, does she have PMS or something? I wonder if that's even possible; frozen in a perpetual state of PMS...that would just be my fucking luck. Her mood swings are giving me fucking whiplash!
"Yes, I'm sorry. What's the fucking problem with that?" I asked her, a slight edge to my voice. I didn't want to fight with her. Nothing good would come from that for me – or my neglected cock – but she was beginning to piss me the fuck off. I'm trying to help her here...doesn't she realize that? She was just sad and worried about Jacob and she hasn't even seen him since she was little for fuck sake! I'm her fucking mate, and where is her concern for me? Non-existent.
Maybe because she doesn't even know about the whole mate thing yet? Fuck, I keep forgetting how new she is. She's just so damn amazing, it's easy to forget. Plus, I can't forget how long it took me to finally realize what she is to me - not that Char would ever fucking let me live that one down - and I've been around a long time. If it took me that long...then I can't just expect her to realize it on her own. Although, it would be rather nice if she hurried the fuck up so we could get to the mating part of our relationship, but I digress.
She never answered me, simply stared off into space as if I didn't even exist - go figure. Peter cleared his throat unnecessarily, gathering her attention. She rolled her eyes at him in response and he frowned and shook his head in disapproval. What the fuck is going on between them? Whatever it is, I don't like it! I growled lowly at Peter in warning, pulling his attention away from my mate.
"It's not what you think, Major," he defended himself, looking like he would piss his pants if he could.
"Yes it is," Bella argued, giving me a smug look. Does she...does she want me to tear his fucking ass apart? Maybe that's her plan – to get us to turn on each other?
"Bella...no! Please, you don't understand...you can't fuck with him like that," Peter said pleadingly, his very life flashing before his eyes as he looked to me. "Nothing is going on, Major – I swear!"
"She says otherwise, Peter," I sneered at him. If he has done more than touch her ass, then his fucking days were numbered.
"I didn't touch her!" he exclaimed, looking to Char for backup.
"That not entirely true, Peter," Char offered, smirking deviously at him.
"Fuck woman, do you want him to kill me?" he asked her incredulously.
"I don't know what you mean. I am just telling him the truth, Peter," she replied sweetly, twirling some hair around her finger leisurely.
"Char," Peter groaned. "Baby please. I'm sorry I touched her ass first, okay?"
"He didn't do anything else, Major," she told me reluctantly.
"Let's get something straight right now... No one touches her but me. Am I fucking clear?" I growled at them.
"Crystal," Peter replied, nodding his head vigorously.
"Yes, Major," Char huffed, pouting in her damn seat. Clearly, she was disappointed by this news – not that I blame her. It's a mighty fine ass, and I would be touching it soon...in fact my hands were quite close to said holy grail right now. If I just moved them down a little bit...
"Fuck you," Bella growled at me, fighting my gift off with more success than before. I had to really concentrate to calm her as she thrashed around in my arms, attempting to break free from my hold.
"Calm the fuck down. I said they won't touch you again," I told her, confused at what her problem was at the moment; I had just defended her for fuck sake. Shouldn't she be thanking me or something?
"And who will protect me from you?" she asked angrily.
Ouch, that one fucking hurt – badly. A flash of confusion registered across her beautiful face as she watched my reaction to what she had said. I'm sure the hurt was quite apparent on my face right now. I couldn't have covered it, even if I had tried. My mate doesn't want me to touch her, and she actually wants someone to protect her from me. My cock has canceled his party and is currently looking for a therapist to prescribe him some strong anti-depressants. Can't say that I blame him – at all. Maybe he'll share.
"I..." she began to say but I cut her off quickly. I really didn't need to be fucking hurt any further today by her.
"Just...can we not fucking talk anymore? It seems we can't get along, so let's leave it at that, and all shut the fuck up, okay?" I told them.
She blinked up at me and looked like she was warring with herself about something, but nodded her agreement reluctantly. An awkward and tension filled silence enveloped the truck after that. No one willing to break the silence first.
It was a few hours later that Peter began squirming nervously in the drivers seat, he kept peeking back at me in the rear-view mirror.
"Christ...what the fuck is it, Peter?" I asked, knowing if I didn't ask him soon it would only make things worse when he finally burst.
"I need to make a stop," he declared cryptically.
"We can't make any fucking stops, Peter. As it is, it's going to be tricky even getting gas. What the hell do you need?" I asked incredulously. "And it damn well better not be another fucking slurpee!"
"Slurpee?" Bella asked in confusion.
"Yeah, it was part of my new undercover job," he told her, making it sound all kinds of important. "You don't want one of those though, Bella. They don't taste as good as they look and smell," Peter informed her, shuddering in disgust at the memory.
"I actually like slurpees," she told him in bewilderment.
"Not anymore you don't. Ignore him, please," I told her, glaring at Peter. If he even tried to get her to drink one, I would kill him. She doesn't know any better yet.
"But I really do like them," she argued, glaring at me as if I was trying to deny her something she wanted. I did notice her glare wasn't so angry this time...kinder maybe? Not as hostile for sure. Hmm, interesting. I wonder what I fucking did to cause that and I wonder if I can do it again...a few thousand times over; then maybe she'll let me touch her. I stifled a moan at the thought of what that would be like. Heaven, pure fucking heaven.
"I dare you to try a cherry one, Bella," Peter said excitedly.
"Peter," I growled. "I said no."
"Fine, fine. You just suck the fun right out of everything," he replied, sulking in his seat.
He never did tell me what the fuck he wanted and I didn't remind him of that fact. I'm sure if it was important, he'd bring it up again eventually. Peter was nothing, if not persistent.
When we needed to stop for gas, Peter parked down the road a ways and walked with Char to the station with a gas can to fill. My gift kept Bella from killing the pup and I'm sure it would have kept her from killing her father as well...but multiple human scents at once? I wasn't going to risk it to find out.
As we were sitting there in the truck waiting for them to get back... I caught her sniffing me. Well, well...what do we have here? She sighed contentedly and tried to nonchalantly lean further into me; she didn't have much room to move with the tight hold I had on her...it was for her safety as well as my own. My cock was still holding onto an inkling of hope that she would change her mind about us, so I couldn't risk having her brush up against him, and she was dangerously close to him as it was.
"What's wrong, darlin'?" I asked her, trying to sound truly curious. I knew what her problem was...she feels it too. This insane attraction to one another; everything about her invites me in...her scent, her voice, her tight little body. Fuck, must change that train of thought quickly...my cock has now perked up and is literally twitching in anticipation.
"Huh?" she asked, pretending to be confused.
"Do I smell bad or something? You were sniffing me...," I asked her with an eyebrow raised, trying very fucking hard to hide the smug smirk that was just begging it's way onto my face.
"Oh that? No, no...just different is all," she explained, trying to pass it off as nothing unusual. She was unwilling to meet my gaze however...and that's because she is flat out lying right now. Does she not realize I can sense her emotions as well as feed them to her? She can't hide that shit from me.
She likes the way I smell! It may seem like a small victory to some but to my cock and I, it was huge. It meant we were making progress. She won't be able to hold out forever...of that much I'm certain. My cock has fired his therapist and is now writing out a wish list of positions he's eager to try. I'll admit, number four is rather intriguing.
"Different, huh? Hmm. Well, I think you smell amazing," I told her truthfully. Her scent was vanilla and strawberries with a very slight floral background to it. She smelled good enough to eat, and I planned to do just that – as soon as she fucking lets me.
"You do?" she asked, looking hopeful before covering it up with a blank expression. I saw it and I didn't even need to – I felt it. Hope was abound inside her.
She wants me too...
Fuck yes! Hallelujah and all that shit! If I could stand up and dance, I'd be doing every damn dance I knew right now.
"I absolutely do, darlin'. You smell so fucking good," I purred to her, leaning down and nuzzling my face into her neck. I blew a breath out onto the skin of her neck before taking a long deep pull of her luscious scent; I knew that would drive her fucking insane. "Good enough to eat," I murmured, lightly brushing my lips against her skin. She moaned in response and I moaned right along with her. Things were going fucking great...until...
She stiffened in my arms and yanked her head as far away from me as possible. What the hell is her problem now?
"Didn't you drink enough from me last time?" she sneered at me. Well fuck...
Peter and Char arrived back before I could even respond to that. They hopped back into the truck and we were once again on our way.
It did give me time to contemplate what she just said, however. Could it be she thinks I'll try to drink from her again? Is that what the fuck this is all about? Does she not realize that she doesn't even have blood anymore? No - that can't be it, she bit me. Surely she noticed it was venom and not blood. I have to assume they explained the way venom worked to her. They can't be that incompetent, it's just not fucking possible. I'm sure Carlisle explained all the physical changes to her in detail. Right?
After another hour on the road, Char's phone began to ring. She pulled it out of her pocket and stared at it like it was some foreign object that she'd never fucking seen or used before.
"No one calls me except you two, and Jasper doesn't even call," she explained, getting a dig in on the fact that I hadn't called her in some time. Not this shit again.
Peter leaned over and looked at the caller id screen and his eyes widened in horror. "You should just ignore it. I'm sure it's just a wrong number," he told her, squirming nervously in his seat. He glanced back at me and swallowed thickly. The phone stopped ringing only to start right back up again a minute later and Peter whimpered in response.
"Whoever it is, they must want to talk to me badly. I may as well just answer it," Char concluded, pushing the button on the phone to answer.
"No, don't!" Peter gasped, but it was too late...
"Hello?" Char answered curiously.
"Yes, is Peter there? I'm calling for advice," a male voice echoed through the phone. That voice sounded so familiar, I swear I know that voice...
Peter sheepishly held out his hand for the phone as Char raised an eyebrow at him. She placed it into his palm and crossed her arms over her chest as she glared wordlessly at him.
"Yes, I'm here. Go ahead," Peter answered, glancing warily back at me.
"I'm lusting after my enemy, Peter...what do I do? It's so wrong and yet I can't help myself."
"Hmm, your enemy you say? What does this enemy look like?" Peter asked curiously.
"Well, she's got this amazing ass...and she's got these breasts that are perky but full ya know...and her hair is thick and long and I just want to run my fingers through it. I wouldn't even care if she killed me at this point; I'm still so damn hard and I've already jacked off three times to thoughts of her!"
"Is she blond or brunette?" Peter asked him suspiciously. It can't be...no fucking way!
"She's a brunette, why?"
"I see. And would her name happen to be Bella by chance?" Peter asked reluctantly, wincing as he glanced back at me. I groaned and closed my eyes as I shook my head in fucking disbelief. This cannot be happening...tell me this is not fucking happening.
"Wow, you are good...it is in fact. How did you know that?" he asked in awe.
"Because, Jacob, I'm one of the vampires that was with Jasper you dumb-ass!" Peter replied, shaking his own head in disbelief.
"Oh," Jacob replied simply.
"Jacob?" Bella gasped in sheer horror.
"Oh my god," he mumbled in embarrassment. "Hi Bella, how's it going?" he asked chuckling nervously.
"It's good to hear you survived, Jacob," I growled interrupting them, while wondering if I had made the right decision in letting him live after all.
"Uh yeah, I did. Sam is stepping down as Alpha and I'll be taking over the pack soon," he replied, sounding all kinds of fucking proud of himself. He won't be Alpha if he's dead – and he may very well end up that way if he keeps jacking off to thoughts of my mate!
"I sincerely hope we don't have to have another chat, Jacob. It might not end the same way," I said, hoping he would get my hidden meaning.
"Yeah, I get it. I wasn't going to stalk her or anything creepy like that...I just...hey, wait a second – why the hell does a vampire have an anonymous advice hot-line anyway?" he asked incredulously.
We all looked over at Peter to answer that fucking question. "What? Doesn't anyone else get bored?" Peter asked defensively.
Char huffed and grabbed the phone out of Peter's hand telling Jacob goodbye. She ended the call, turned off the phone, and threw it on the floor by her feet.
"Baby..."
"Don't you fucking dare baby me, Peter! This is getting way out of control – I think it's time you end the hot-line business," she told him firmly.
"But Char...I really don't see what the big deal is?" he argued with her, just digging himself a deeper hole. Not fucking smart, man. Not that I was an expert on relationships - obviously - but even I knew he should just agree with her at this point. It was rather nice for once to be on this end – just sitting back and watching the show. Bella snickered quietly in my arms – apparently she agreed as well.
"The deal? The fucking deal is just last week you actually stopped during sex to take a phone call, Peter – how do you think that makes me feel, huh?" she growled angrily at him.
"But that was the suicide hot-line, I couldn't exactly tell them to hold...well I did actually when you started sucking me and then I...come to think of it, I don't even know what happened to that caller since he hung up..."
"Peter, why the fuck are they now calling my phone?" she growled, interrupting him. I was curious about that myself, and looked back over to Peter as he shifted around nervously deciding how to answer her. Damn this was a good show.
"Well...you see...about that...I sort of have it so that if they can't reach me on my phone then it will default to yours. And since mine is currently back in the forest in Forks...," he replied sheepishly. "By the way, that's what I needed to stop and get – a new cell phone," he told me, finally remembering what he wanted earlier.
"It can wait until we reach the house. Then you can get whatever you fucking want," I replied, glancing down at Bella in alarm...
She was whimpering – in pain.
"Darlin'...what is it? What's wrong?" I asked, highly concerned. This didn't look like any trick to me. I took in her emotions then...thirst, extreme thirst. Fuck!
"It burns," she cried out, trying desperately to get her arms free from my hold. I let one of her arms free; I knew she was in no condition right now to even try to pull something on us. She swiftly brought her hand up to her throat and clawed at it frantically. "Please, make it stop – it hurts, Jasper," she whimpered in agony.
She was breaking my fucking unbeating heart right now. I wanted so badly to kill that son-of-a-bitch James all over again for biting her. I wouldn't have her then, it's true; but I would give her up if it meant not seeing her in pain this way, and I'd do it without a second of regret. Yup, apparently I'm now embracing my new pussy status completely. My cock shook his head in shame.
"Darlin', listen to me...okay? You need to trust me to help you, can you do that?" I asked her, prying her hand away from her neck – she was starting to leave marks. They were healing immediately of course, but I'm sure she didn't want more scars added to her neck.
Peter and Char had stopped fighting with each other and were now looking on with their own concern for her. They knew what it was like to be this thirsty...all three of us did. Maria had been a sadistic fucking bitch and liked to starve us to get us to fight harder for our food rewards. We've all been there...and the pain she's feeling right now...is beyond description. I should have thought of it earlier; she hasn't even fed once since she's been awake. The Cullens were too busy being incompetent pussies to handle things properly. That's way too long for a newborn to go...we need to get her blood – right fucking now.
"Peter, grab my phone out of my pocket and call Edward," I told him. He didn't even hesitate this time, reaching into my pocket and pulling out my phone while Char steered the truck. He too, was beyond worried about her. He dialed and set it to speaker.
"Jasper, everything okay?" Edward answered, classical music playing softly in the background.
"No, everything is not fucking okay," I growled at him.
"Okay then...what's the problem?" he asked, sounding like he was rolling his fucking eyes at me.
"The problem is, Bella is in extreme pain right now! None of you thought to even fucking try to feed her," I explained angrily, wishing I had someone I could tear apart at this very moment. I had so much pent up frustration and anger coursing through me right now, it was getting harder and harder to manage. Especially while keeping continuous doses of calm going into Bella, on top of that her calming effect on me was completely gone due to her own distress. The fact that her thirst wasn't being affected anymore by the highest setting of my gift was very, very concerning. She was beyond any point a newborn should ever reach. She was in starvation mode, and that was a dangerous situation for us to be in. She's fucking strong at hell, not showing any hint of the pain until this point...stronger than anyone I've ever known. Peter was right - she is bad ass.
"I tried to get her to go hunting with me, but she refused," he replied defensively.
Bella growled at him in response to that. Something tells me it was more than just an offer to go hunting with him. Fucker!
"Don't try to blame him for this, Jasper! She's the one out of control!" Alice interjected in his defense. Bitch. How dare she talk about my mate that way. She isn't out of control - she's a newborn and I am the reason she is so upset. I fucked up. They just aren't aware of that fact - yet anyway.
"We need to stop and get her something, right now!" I told them, ignoring Alice for now. I'd have more words for her later on this subject and others, that's for sure.
"Alright – and how do you propose we do that?" Edward asked sighing heavily.
"Peter get us to the nearest wooded area," I ordered, before telling Edward to simply keep following behind us. Carlisle and Esme had stopped along the way to pick up some things we would need for the house in Montana, so they weren't following behind us anymore. I wonder how Emmett and Rose's truck hunt is going. They really need to find that fucking thing - without it, it won't matter if she calls her father or not.
"It would probably help her quicker if she had human..." Peter trailed off at my glare. "Just saying. Forest critters coming right up."
"She'd slaughter a whole fucking town at the point she's at right now, Peter," I told him angrily. I wasn't forcing her to hunt animals and he better not be implying that I was. As far as I was concerned, she could choose to hunt whatever she fucking wants. Human blood wouldbe the best bet right now – if we had a lone human to feed her, that is. Sending her into a town would not be a pretty picture once she had her fill - more like a massacre of epic proportions. Plus, I don't think Carlisle would fucking approve if we did, and I really don't want to listen to his fucking lectures.
Peter found a small forested area a few miles away. It was only about five acres of forest. Unfortunately, we were near a large town at the moment and without going through it, there simply wasn't many options to choose from here. There would definitely be deer at the very least. Not the most appetizing meal for her but we needed to get some blood into her quickly, which meant no time to be fucking picky about it.
Stopping the truck, Edward parked his Volvo behind us. He walked over to the side of the truck with Alice and they waited for me to get out. Alice was frowning deeply as she watched my interaction with Bella closely. I clutched her to me tightly and tried desperately to give her as much calm as my gift was capable of. It wasn't nearly enough. My mate was in pain and I needed to fix it - quickly.
"Jasper..."Alice began.
I didn't have time to chat with them. I simply cut her off ordering Char, Peter, and Alice to stay with the cars to cover us in case anyone stopped, and Edward to follow me. I dashed into the forest carrying her while looking for the scent of anything remotely edible – hell even a raccoon would help very minutely. It would just taste like shit. Fortunately, the sounds of a couple deer met my ears.
"Edward to the north, two deer. Go fetch them," I ordered him, stopping in my tracks and lowering Bella and I to the forest floor. She was seated on my lap, rocking back and forth as she closed her eyes and literally begged me to help her.
"Just hang in there a few minutes more, darlin'. I got you," I soothed, rocking along with her.
"I think this is a bad idea, Jasper..." Edward began to argue.
"Are you fucking kidding me? Get the fucking deer - now Edward!" I roared at him, having no patience left in this situation. My mate was in pain, and she needed my help. It was the only thing resounding in the forefront of my thoughts at this moment.
Edward flinched and shook his head at me. "She's not. Alice is," he hissed at me, before taking off to wisely get the fucking deer. Was he seriously messing with me right now? Fucking idiot. I could have brought Peter with me instead, but I thought Edward's speed and familiarity with hunting animals would make things easier - I should have known better.
He arrived a few moments later with one deer. One. Incompetent, useless, pathetic excuse for a vampire. Unfucking believable.
"Here, darlin'...drink this," I told her, breaking the deer's neck swiftly and bringing it up to her lips. She snarled and grabbed the deer from my grasp. Good girl. I let her free to feed and moved away from her cautiously as Edward's eyes widened fearfully in response.
"Do you think you should just let her go like that?" he asked warily.
"It's either that or lose my fucking head when she tears it off of me for encroaching on her feed. She's at starvation level, Edward. She would kill anyone in order to feed right now, without hesitation," I informed him – so naïve.
If there was such a thing as a sheltered vampire - Edward was definitely the definition of that. He's never felt the sheer desperation for just one drop of blood. At one point Maria held a killing contest with a reward of just one drop of blood after being starved...out of eighteen competing vampires; Peter had killed four, Char had killed three, and I had killed eight. It was truly a miracle we hadn't turned on each other that day. He simply would never be able to comprehend what we have been through and the horrors we have seen. Some at our very own hands. A fact none of us are proud of; but we aren't ashamed of either. We survived living in the pits of hell and lived to talk about it - how many can say that? Our scars aren't fucking pretty but we wear them proudly. The Cullens think I cover them from shame... but the real reason? The very sight of them invokes fear in other vampires...they're a warning sign, and rightfully so. However, living around six other vampires who feel afraid each and every time they gaze at you - isn't pleasant when you are an empath. So I cover them, so I don't have to deal with their emotions - but never once from any shame.
"Now go find another deer for her," I ordered impatiently, she was almost done with the first one already. He dashed off and she crouched defensively over the deer once it was empty. Clutching it to her body as she scanned it's form for more. She bit and tore into it several more times, only to pull back more and more angry each time she found nothing left. Hurry the fuck up Edward!
He returned a moment later, thank god... with a very small doe. It definitely wouldn't give her much. I rolled my eyes at him and he shrugged in response. "Not much to be had here," he explained defensively.
I ignored him and went to break it's neck. As soon as I did so, Bella hissed and grabbed it from me using her teeth, narrowly missing my fingers. She tore viciously through it's neck, blood spraying out before she clamped her mouth over the wound. She gulped greedily as some blood dribbled out of her mouth and down her chin, staining her shirt and pants in large dark red splotches.
"Will two be enough?" Edward questioned, watching her in horror as he too realized it wouldn't be.
"No."
"What do we do?" he asked tentatively. "I don't sense any more nearby."
"I don't fucking know."
It was at this moment that some of my attention was diverted as I tried to come up with some sort of plan to get her more blood.
She stood up and cringed in disgust as she looked down at the mangled deer carcasses at her feet in confusion...and then she noticed her clothing stained with the remnants of her feed. "Oh god, I did this?" she gasped in horror, looking over at mine and Edward's still clean clothing.
"It's okay, darlin'," I soothed, taking a few cautious steps towards her. I wasn't sure how much of her blood-lust would really have faded from just the two deer and, regardless, it wouldn't tide her over for long. She could snap again at any moment.
"Oh no, no, no," she chanted shaking her head back and forth.
I should have seen it coming - I'm an empath for fuck sake - I should have sensed her rising panic. But I was fucking distracted and before I could reach her in time... she took off running.
"Bella!" I yelled, running after her.
"Jasper, she's going to run!" Alice yelled out from the direction of the cars.
Just a little too fucking late there Alice.
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AN:
Silly Alice...hehe. Jacob...hehehehe. So some progress between Bella and Jasper in this chapter - even though she just ran away.
On another note, in this story there will be no "Jasper is ashamed of his past and his scars". He isn't proud of what he's done - but he isn't ashamed of surviving or of the scars that remind him of that fact. I've decided to take a different approach and I really hope you like it.
Please leave me some feedback and let me know what you thought! Maybe I'll even tell you what position number four was...okay I really won't tell you - but please review anyway? )
BTW: The suicide caller would like to inform everyone that he is okay! He hung up because Peter's moaning was reminding him of his own absent sex life and making him even more depressed. Fortunately, he has since found himself a very good therapist and is currently doing much better!