Knock. Knock. Knock.
"Ali, hey." Emily said.
"Listen, I've been thinking a lot about you." Alison said quickly rushing into the door, "I've been going down memory lane all day, replaying every moment I've ever had with you and regretting so many things. I know its been a long time, and we never really talk about us. It seems to be a topic we avoid at least but I just have to get something off my chest. Okay so just.. can you just listen for a second?"
Emily nodded.
"I've been terrible to you Em. I kissed you and I played with your feelings all through the first years of high school. I mean, I had your heart in my hands and I dropped it and then picked it up so many times."
"Wow, graphic imagery." Emily said handing Alison a glass of water.
"Em, please."
"Sorry, go ahead."
"And then that night, a couple of years ago when we slept together, I just ignored it. We never talked about it again. With Mona's trial and then the dollhouse and then all of us going our separate ways, we never figured it out. We didn't talk Em, I don't even know what that meant, even after all this time.
And then with Rollins I thought to myself, 'well that's it. Emily and I, not gonna happen.' But that doesn't mean I didn't think of you every single night before bed and wish that in some parallel universe, you were the one laying next to me. And before you talk, I know that you've moved on. And there's no way you feel the same way but I was trapped in that room Em, with a mask on my face and I was just slowly going crazy. The room was constantly spinning and I couldn't move. I couldn't get out Em. He had complete power over me. There was no escape. Except for the thought of you. I thought of you and what I would tell you if I ever made it out alive and it got me through. So here I am, not wasting one more second of my life regretting things I haven't told you because you and I both know that things can sucks sometimes and life is unpredictable." Alison breathed really heavy nervously, "I love you Em. I always have. I guess you just deserve to know."
Emily stood dumbfounded. Did the Alison Dilaurentis just tell her that she was in love with her? What do you do with a bomb like that?
"You don't have to say anything." Alison said looking down at her feet. The silence hurt more than any response Emily could have given her. "I'll leave you alone."
Alison started walking towards the door and she stepped out. Emily heard a car start and drive away. She couldn't move. She couldn't run after her. Why? Didn't she love her? Weren't those the words that she had always dreamed of hearing from Alison?
Knock. Knock. Knock.
Oh no she's back.
"Oh thank god its you. I thought you were Ali."
"And why would that be such a bad thing?" Aria asked.
"No reason." Emily said calmly, "Except for the fact that she showed up at my house a couple of minutes ago to tell me that she's in love with me."
"What?"
"Yeah, she came over and went on this huge rant about regretting how she treated me in high school and not talking about what it meant after we slept together—"
"Wait, you two slept together?"
"Yeah." Emily said regretting telling her.
"Why didn't you tell us?" Aria asked.
"I'm sorry I just… I didn't know if Ali wanted anyone to know and that's because we didn't talk about it just like she said. God Aria, what the hell am I going to do?" Emily said putting her hands on her head.
"It's going to be okay Em. When did this happen?"
"Right before she got arrested for Mona's murder."
"And you've kept it a secret all this time?" Aria asked.
Emily nodded.
"Wow, you really are the loyal one."
"Yeah, yeah I know. We've all changed Aria, but inside I still feel like that 16 year old girl afraid to turn the light off at night."
"Me too." Aria said, "We've all tried to get past what happened to us but deep down, it still haunts everyday. No matter what we say to hide it."
"Do you think we'll ever be able to be happy?"
"I don't know Em. But all I know is that in the hardest times in my life, there were two things that got me through. My friends, and Ezra. With every memory of pain that haunts my mind, there's one beautiful one right next to it, with him. Which can only mean one thing. I know that I can make it through anything if I have him. With the person we love, the bad things seem less bad and the wonderful things seem all the more wonderful. If Alison is that person for you, then Em, run like hell to her house and never let go of her again. Because you're going to be happy. We both are." Aria said comfortingly.
"When did you become so wise?" Emily asked.
"When did you become so afraid to be with Alison?" Aria asked, "I know you love her."
"I do. But it's never been real. She's broken my heart so many times Aria. How am I supposed to trust that she's not lying this time?"
"Emily be honest with me right now. Did you ever actually doubt that she loved you back?"
"No."
"She's been scared too. Way more scared than you. She didn't share her feelings because she didn't want to admit weakness in that life she was living in high school. She was a bitch Em. Okay I know that. But she never was with you. And that has to count for something."
"What do you think I should do?"
"I think you should go over to her house. And I think you should have no expectations. And I think you should talk."
Emily smiled at the simplicity of the solution, "And I think you're right."
Knock. Knock. Knock.
"Hello Emily." Alison said.
"Hello Alison."
"Things just got incredibly worse didn't they? I messed up." Alison said.
"No, no you didn't. I was just overwhelmed that's all."
"Do you want come in?"
Emily walked through the door and her shoulder brushed past Alison's. She stopped in mid-walk and her face was 4 inches away from Alison. She was closer than she had been in years. She could see the darker blue stripes in her eyes. She could count her eyelashes, memorize each freckle. Alison was there in all of her beauty and she couldn't look away. She was so close. Close enough to kiss.
Alison was moving closer. Why was she moving closer? Emily's heart started to race, and Alison's eyes started to close. She knew what as going to happen. Her heart sped even faster and she could feel it in the back of her head. Alison must have been only a half an inch away from her and she felt her own eyes close like her body was telling her to do something her mind wasn't sure she wanted. It was suddenly black and then she felt Alison's soft lips touch hers slowly. They started to move and come back to hers in a new position. They were smooth and perfectly shaped for hers. Suddenly, Emily felt at home. Maybe Aria was right. Maybe Alison was that one person that was going to make everything worth it.