A/N - I know...I know its been an age since the last update, but I didn't have a chapter in me, and instead of writing some crappy filler, I wanted to be sure I was writing something worthy of your time. I know readers get impatient, kinda do myself with fics I read so I have felt your pain! It is hard for me to put pen to paper - so to speak, and I know this fic is glaringly full of mistakes, not being a fully fledged writer etc. but I think I've been okay at my first full length story. There will be more chapters to come, but ideas and inspiration come and go for me, so I can't guarantee that it'll be every month. Trying to force something when its not up to scratch isn't how I work and I apologise for being that bit slower lately. I really want to finish this and give my Natalia Hawke, Fenris and friends completion, no matter how long it takes.
I'm hoping and praying that you stick with me, as I'd love you too - it will be worth it!
Saying that, I do hope you enjoy. Happy reading! As always I appreciate each and every one of you reading this, just makes me full of warm fuzzies that at least one person likes the words coming out of my brain!
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Anders lets out a heavy sigh once he pushes the door closed when his two friends leave. He has to prepare a little for the clinic to open fully, checking supplies are not plentiful but adequate enough, and the small medicinal bottles are filled before dispensing.
If it wasn't for Hawke and Sebastian donating spare bandages or potions - even ingredients - on a regular basis, he didn't know what he would do. Being an apostate mage and a Grey Warden on the run didn't really help fill the purse to buy all he needed. He did win a few rounds when they played card games, but not nearly enough for his needs.
Although regular patients gave him food, such as eggs or bread when they could. That they wanted to give their own meagre supplies as payment warmed his heart a little, knowing that they had even less than him at times.
As the door shuts, he glances at the people gathered outside thinking to himself that its not as bad as it usually is.
He moves across to tidy up the drawers he'd been trawling through, quite aware that the embarrassed flush in his cheeks was taking a little time to fully disappear. He grimaces and mutters to himself "Idiot, way to go there, showing you're still bloody awkward round her."
His grimace turns into a barely there smile. At least he'll be involved in her life, maybe not what he had previously longed for, but he would do anything to make sure she was safe and no harm came to her or her children. He did really want to be part of her life, and if only friendship was on the cards, he'd take the second chance he'd been offered, and not being in anyway egotistical, he was the best healer for the job. It may get a little awkward when it came to the birth, but he was sure his healer mode would kick in.
The mostly silent voice in his head rings through his mind - the voice he will never get used to no matter how long they were joined, causes him to gasp. "You cannot think about diversions such as her at this time, bigger things are at hand." He squints as the echo recedes, its sharp trill nearly cause for the onset of a headache and nods. "Yes - yes I'm well aware, just...just let me be for a while...you know how I felt about her, emotions like that do not simply go away, so give me space, please?" Huffing out another exasperated breath when his plea is met with silence.
After a final check that he has enough bandages, and quickly washing his hands in the nearby sink, he turns towards the entrance once again and turns the small switch which lights the gas lamp above the door, showing his patients that he's now open. At the same time he pulls open one of the heavy wooden doors and he greets a slightly disheveled old woman standing at the start of the queue, who has a crying young boy in tow.
"Now, how can I help you..."
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They two women amicably along the way towards Darktown's exit whilst the both of them, well mostly Natalia, munch on the remaining biscuits.
Before approaching the final staircase towards the well lit entry-way, they reach another area crammed with barrels and wooden crates. Apparently it was the norm to just dump them there, but as long as they weren't rat infested, it seemed as if it was accepted.
"So...Charade?" Now that they were alone, Natalia prompted, whilst trying to find a comfortable, splinter-less seat, her piercing blue eyes crinkling in the corners as she smiles warmly.
Dusting her fingers off on her short blue skirt, Izzie meets her friends enquiring gaze, brown eyes filled with humour, she grins, not saying anything until they are both settled.
Nimbly hopping onto a crate, she settles with her legs swinging carelessly, the heels of her soft leather boots drumming against the wood. "Hmmmm...where to start. At the beginning I guess! I actually met her off the ship when she got here...simply ages ago. One of Varric's contacts had passed her arrival details to him and he thought it a marvelous idea that I nabbed her before she could waltz up to your estate. I knew glow boy would not be pleased if she turned up after that Crow thing, at least before you'd had a chance to speak to him."
Brushing a few strands of thick, dark brown hair out of her eyes, the many warn leather and gold bracelets gathered at her wrists tinkling quietly, she continues "Turns out that fate had other ideas. Sparks flew, the world upended itself and before we knew it we were waking up in a hard, uncomfortable bed, utterly exhausted. Sore in all the right places of course. It was such an amazing few days, minus the Butterbile hangover."
Ignoring the blushes from her best friend she carries on. "A few days later after she'd taken care of some personal things she dropped by again. She stayed with me of course, and on the hunt for food, we were lucky enough to run into you and those exceptionally rough bastards and that as they say, is history."
Chuckling, Natalia shifts against a bright red barrel, smirking at the constant good humoured piss taking "Hey, my man has a name, I would love it if you used it at least once, please? Also - a tiny bit too much info for my poor ears, and my poor babies to hear. So...is...ur, is it serious? I mean are you happy, I really want you to be - and what is Butterbile?"
Leaning against the same make-shift chair, she nudges Natalia gently, a small smile appearing on her darkly tanned face. Sighing dramatically "I knew as soon as you found out, that's the first thing you would ask, its so your thing." Glancing sideways she continues after a short silence.
"You know, when we first met, I thought you and I could have had something, but you were an innocent, didn't get hardly any of my comments laden with innuendo. Some of them were my best you know, but nothing, or if there was you just stuttered excuses and all but ran away - it was almost too funny. You clearly didn't fancy me at all, but turns out you were really into shiny, manly elves with anger issues. Not that I minded. You are gorgeous, but no connection whatsoever. You're more like a sister to me - one that I'd do anything for, especially now."
Waggling a ring adorned finger, she tuts jokingly. "Apart from looking after two squirming, screaming children of course. I'd need Varric as back up for that, his chest hair can occupy one of them I think, it is rather mesmerizing." Pursing her lips thoughtfully, she takes another moment and continues "I see you and Fenris, how utterly happy you both are - well after your got back together of course, and...at first it...sort of hurt, you know, to see that and not have it for myself. I had thought I was jealous of him, or you, maybe both - but I was just hoping for even a tenth of something like that. I didn't think that I'd ever have anyone to care about me, properly. Like I'd matter to someone if I were to get hurt, or worse."
Fiddling with her bracelets, seeming a little more than uncomfortable with the flow of conversation, not used to being so direct, she shrugs. "I'm not even talking about a lover being there for me, though that'd be fantastic - just having a person give two shits would be nice. Until you came along of course. I don't think you've really noticed how you keep everyone together like some sort of mama bear, looking out of each and every one of us."
Sighing heavily, pulling herself up as if noticing the "little chat" had gotten all too serious, she carries on "Sometimes I think that we take you too much for granted, that you're always going to be there, no matter what. You're going to actually be a mama for real, no matter how the circumstance. Children change things, completely - but you being you, will find a way to continue looking after us in your own way. I just wish that you'd let us take care of you. We want to, if only you'd let us."
Slipping an arm around her shoulder, Natalia rubs her arm in comfort "Yeah, I wasn't used to anyone being that obvious about attraction and you sort of...ah...were there and all bosomy and full of self confidence. I didn't know how to react - just felt embarrassed that I couldn't tell you I wasn't interested. Then Fenris came along and no one else mattered to me in that way. Lord knows it was a difficult start to the relationship, but we both got through it - hiccups and all. I can't say its easy all the time, but that's how we grow I guess. We are closer than ever."
"I know I've to rely on others, but for so long it was me looking out for Mother, Beth and Carver, so its a little hard for me to accept that others want to do things for me. I will try to let you guys do more, especially now" She rubs her belly softly with a small smile. "I hope you give Char a chance, she's family and you both need a little happiness in your life. Though if you hurt her, I'm not beyond firing the odd fireball up someone's behind - though you'd probably enjoy that a little too much I think!"
With a twist of her lips in her own wry smile Izzies huffs a little at that "We are taking it slow, which obviously means we - well, I think it might be something, but I really don't want to hex it or anything."
Shaking her head a little as if to clear it, she claps her hands together and brings an end to their conversation "Well, this has gotten really heavy. I blame you, its what happens when people get in the family way. No late nights, no booze, and you start having talks about life, trying to set the world to rights. Being sober and having way too many responsibilities is no fun at all I tell you."
Helping Natalia up off her perch, her hand lingers on her arm, fingers playing with a thread that had worked itself loose after snagging on one of her gold bangles. "To answer your question, yes I am happy, for the moment at least. Things in my life don't stay the same for long enough for me to think long term - or they didn't used to. I'm not going anywhere, nor Charade, so we're good." Stepping away, her hand drops "So, are you happy we're happy or you need more deep and meaningful?" Dark eyes rimmed with Khol twinkle with laughter.
Smiling like the cat who got the cream, she softly shakes her head "Na you loveable rogue, I'm good - now lets get going, despite the snack I'm famished, eating for three you know!"
They walk on arm in arm, she quickly adds "You already know that I'll somehow talk you round into at least one or two nights of child-minding, Varric included."
Echoes of throaty laughter trails in their wake with the quiet promise of a gift of one bottle of Butterbile being offered if no one was dragged into baby-sitting duty they walk unhurried out of Darktown.
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A few weeks later...
Warm calloused fingers press softly over her eyes as she leans heavily against Fenris, his breathing hitches as her bottom bumps against him when she fails to step forward as he does, not entirely on purpose as she smirks with glee.
Natalia feels his warm breath against her neck as he quietly grumbles so that only she can hear "You did that on purpose, not that I mind, but I would rather not take you on the floor in front of our friends. It may shock them." Green eyes glance forward toward the Rivaini and he adds "Perhaps not all. However I want to keep our private life just that, so let us keep moving."
Laughing out loud "Okay, okay I'm sorry!" She squeezes his arm in apology and they move slowly up the stairs. "I guess I'm just so excited. I may need the privy again, don't forget my bladder seems to have dwindled to the size of a pea."
"Come on you two, stop dawdling!" Natalia hears the mock irritation in Varric's voice from somewhere in front of them as they near one of the bedrooms.
Fenris had already given Sebastian the room key, hidden all these weeks from Hawke, so there is no need to take his hands from her face, prolonging the excitement.
The door to the new nursery is pushed all the way open once finally unlocked for good, as they make their way into the brightly lit room, the sun pouring through the newly washed windows.
He had feared at one point she would have tried to blast the door down in frustration, blaming herself for losing the only key to the room one afternoon when she had suddenly thought to start to work on her mothers old room, to prepare for the children's arrival - not knowing he had secretly been working for weeks on the same thing. However, he had managed to placate her by suggesting they take a trip to the locksmith, which was interrupted by - not so - chance meeting with Merrill and Varric who then decided to go for food and before they knew it, time had flown and all the stalls and shops were closed.
With the addition of letters from Carver, various outings into Hightown and the Chantry she had been kept busy enough until he had accomplished what he needed to.
They'd also gotten to the bottom of the poisoned food that Blaze had the misfortune to digest, someone with a grudge against elves, no one of great importance, just a second cousin of one of Natalia and Fenris's neighbours who had taken it upon themselves to be vindictive.
Apparently they were meant to be delivered directly to Orana, but the note had gotten lost, and the messenger hadn't been paid enough to care how they got to the house, it was a wonder the boy hadn't have eaten them himself. Varric with his close network of spies had soon uncovered the culprit and Aveline had taken great pleasure in imprisoning them until their sentence.
With baited breath he releases his hands and with a small smile says "Open your eyes Talia". She does just that and blinks, eyes adjusting to the bright light.
It doesn't take too long before she's gasping in delight as she takes in the beautifully crafted furniture in front of her, her eyes shining with wonder. Moving to the book shelf now overflowing with tomes of various sizes. With another soft gasp, she turns to look at Varric, who is grinning and blushing at the same time "You wrote all of these?"
Running her hands over one book, she can't help but pick it up, its title making her chuckle "The Mage Princess and the Elf Warrior - might be a little advanced for them first thing, but how can I thank you, you've put so much work into all of this." As she puts the small book back, Varric shrugs and replies "Hey, there's nothing really fun for the little tikes to read out there, so who better than little old me to give them stories they'd actually want to hear? Plus I could just imagine daddy Fenris reading to them in that manly voice of his."
Natalia moves over to the tiny fluffy cuddly animals lined up on one shelf, she laughs all the while and shakes her head at the birds and wolves staring back at her. She pulls out the drawers of a dainty chest, half filled with hand made children's clothes in many colours, her hands lovingly caress in wonder and awe.
The wall closest to her had been adorned with brightly coloured paintings. With dramatic scenes from the sea, small ships pitting themselves against a choppy ocean, leading to forests and flowers of every variety. Skimming her fingers over green trees housing bright colourful birds, she knows who created the amazing landscapes before her. "Seb, whenever did you find the time to - and how in the fade did I not notice all of this going on?" she shakes her head "- I just love it all, so much, how can I ever thank you?"
Sebastian coughs and shrugs as Varric had "Fenris it seems is part rogue I think, we moved a lot of this when you were either out or napping, but you were kept busy for the most part, we had to - on pain of death if you found out about it. For all you've done for us, there isn't anything we wouldn't do for you, you know that."
Tears slip silently and unnoticed down her cheeks as her gaze finally rest on the large, intricately carved cot which is the centerpiece of the perfectly furnished room. "Oh Maker, it's all so beautiful!" Her hands fly to her mouth, as her eyes crinkle with disbelief.
There's a small mobile hanging over it with boats and various sea creatures spinning slowly, the hanging creatures sparkle in the light - one of Izzies purchases, it fits right in with the walls design and will be entertaining for the babies.
Moving round to the side of the cot she sees that leaves have been carved into the golden wood, the foliage surrounds an male elf embracing a human woman, two children beside them, one at each side. It was beautiful and so very detailed, she knows that a lot of love was put into this, as well as everything else, its almost too much to take.
Spinning round to Fenris she asks "When did you do all of this? The key, I knew I hadn't misplaced it! Wait 'til I get you alone. However did you manage, I mean I know I'm not observant but - " She shrugs and runs her hand over the sides of the cot, he reaches out and grasps her free hand, with the other he wipes stray tears away.
"I am sorry for keeping this from you, we all wanted to do something for you and all pitched in, but I wanted to give you something that was from me, just me. Sebastian helped source the majority of the furniture, but I wanted to craft the cot myself. I hope you like it." Half a smile appears on his face as he blushes just a little in response to Hawkes open joy, especially with everyone gathered for this moment.
Throaty snickering behind them "I think you did that already lover boy!" Followed with an "Ouch, watch where you stick that thing!"
Grasping her man's arms she pulls him in for a squishy hug and mutters close into his ear "It's truly wonderful, I adore you so much." Smiling for the hundredth time when she feels him shiver in response to her warm breath as it flutters against his pointed ear.
He pulls her even closer in a rare display of open affection and whispers "There is nothing I want more than to see our boys - or girls - in here, healthy and happy. Now shall we go eat the magnificent feast prepared for us and our friends? Merrill and the apos- ummm...Anders will be along later with their gifts." He brushes her lips against her cheek before she moves back, and nods to him, flushing in response to his words. "Yep, though I need to go to the loo first, but won't be far behind you all."
Aveline stands to the side, holding something behind her back, and after everyone leaves to head down to the dinner table, she shuffles forwards and coughs. "I know we've not spent much time together recently, I'm sorry for that, but the guard have been busier than usual, what with the influx of refugees..." Stopping at Natalia's raised eyebrow, she snickers "Oh, sorry! I ah, I have something for you, I hope you like it."
Pulling her arms from behind her back she thrusts her hands out and Hawke grabs a large soft blanket, but after unfolding it notices its not just a blanket, large squares of fabric have been embroidered onto it, familiar faces look up to her. Each square section has been designed with her friends likeness. "I thought it would be nice to have all of us in one place in one form or another. We all seem to find it harder these days to be here together, though did have some help. I can sew a little, learnt when I was young, but couldn't do it all." She helps spread the blanket over the cot and manages to almost hide her shock when she's roughly snapped up in a tight hug.
Talia's loud sniffing makes her pull back with a grin. "Hey no more tears, at least I hope they're happy ones and not in horror at my lack of skills?" She steps back and chuckles at the soft nudge she received from her best friend. "You need to stop doing that, putting yourself down, its beyond amazing what you've all done for me. I'm just so overjoyed that you're all here - well you will be when the others finally show up."
Swiping the fast drying tears, she hesitates before quietly asking "Umm, I know its a lot to ask, but I - can you do something for me?" There is not a hint of hesitation in Avelines reply. "Anything, what do you need?"
"I would love it if you're here when the babies come, please. I'm terrified, even with Fenris being so strong I just need a little sisterly support through my labour. You also have an amazingly high tolerance for pain, so you need to be there to hold my hand."
Taking care not to crush her, she pulls back and sees the tiny sliver of fear running through Talia's eyes. Pursing her mouth, hating not being able to extinguish the emotion, Aveline answers swiftly "There's no place I'd be but at your side, though I might just stay at the top end, but I'll be there however you need me. However at this moment you need to go to the loo, and then we can go get something to eat - I heard your stomach from across the hallway earlier!"
Giggling, they separate but walk closely side by side out of the room, and with a soft click the new nursery is once more quiet in the bright sunshine.