"Your turn" Janet said "Erm… favourite moment with the SGC?"

"Too many to call" Daniel complained, wide-eyed at the thought of picking just one.

"Ok, most satisfying then!" Janet amended, folding her arms and looking at him expectantly.

Daniel rubbed his chin thoughtfully, and decided that all his memories associated with Sha're were off limits. "Finding Earnest Littlefield still alive would be up there" he said at length. He shot a sideways glance at Janet and grinned mischievously.

"Most disgusting?"

Janet pulled a face and leant back in her chair. "Something to do with symbiots probably." she said, replying straight away. "Rummaging around in Gould pouches is pretty gross. Though I've kinda gotten used to them now."

She looked thoughtfully at Daniel, "Biggest surprise?"

"Um… probably the time we were turned into androids, or the time I switched bodies with Machello, or the time we went back to 1969, or er 'meeting' Urgo, or…"

"I get it!" Janet cut in laughing. "Too much choice again."

"Actually" Daniel continued thoughtfully "The biggest surprise was when the gate worked for the first time. After that, I kinda learnt to expect crazy."

"What did you think would happen when you first tried it?" Janet asked with interest. "I mean, did you know what it was going to do?"

"I knew what it was meant to do" Daniel said "I didn't particularly expect it to actually work! What about you? How did you get involved in the SGC anyhow?" He realised that he had never actually asked her about her past before.

"By accident mostly" Janet said. "I mean, I'd join the Air Force as a medic, then I saw an advert asking for doctors interested in taking part of a manned mission to Mars. I applied, was called for interviews, got offered the job and then discovered that the Mars mission was a cover. A few months and a lot of big surprises later and I was trying to contain an alien plague and wondering what I had let myself in for."

"Steep learning curve eh?" said Daniel, remembering the increasing panic in the SGC as the plague took hold. At the time he hadn't stopped to think about how new Janet must have been to the job. She'd seemed so calm.

She nodded emphatically. "Just a bit. Nanites, Gould physiology, transferal of consciousness – all missing from med school!"

Daniel laughed "Bet you didn't know you were gonna need to know about them!" then looked thoughtful and said in tones that were at once both wistful and excited "There is so much out there still to learn".

Janet stretched pleasurably and stifled a yawn. "Well it will have to wait until tomorrow" she said decisively "I'm turning in."

"Yeah" he agreed. It was time to call it a night. He was more than ready for bed himself, despite his long sleep earlier. "Thanks Janet. It's… well, it's been good." He gave her an awkward hug and then stepped back, his hands resting lightly on her shoulders. He looked at her seriously and then flashed another quick smile. "Really, thanks" he reiterated hesitantly "you're a … um good friend."

"When I'm not nagging you to take it easy" Janet said with a swift laugh, breaking the tension. "Talking of which, don't forget to take your meds."

Back in his own quarters Daniel slowly undressed and tried to unscramble the muddle of thoughts and emotions that were fighting for dominance in his head. Right at the centre was a big mass of gnawing worry for Sam, Jack and Teal'c and all balled up with that was a significant tangle of frustration that he could not do more to help. The frustration itself was muddled in with a lack of confidence in those – McKay principally - who were supposed to be helping. That lot took up quite a bit of mental space already, but bouncing round like mad pingpong balls, sometimes lost in the chaos and at other times hitting him with a stinging smack, were flash backs to Nick (both then and now), memories of Sha're's death and now the icy fear that SG-1 were already dead too. In amongst the maelstrom of negativity were a few more positive thoughts doing their level best to get heard. The moment the gate vanished glowed in his memory as a beacon of hope (though the glow seemed to be getting progressively dimmer the longer it took to get the beta gate up and running). He had odd flashes of optimism; bright memories of previous escapes that made him absolutely sure that everything would be ok this time too. Then there were the more mundane things. He had enjoyed dinner with Janet and once they had finally got onto 'talking about something different' he had actually had a really good time (marred only by sudden feelings of guilt about enjoying himself). Then there was the triumph he had felt at persuading her not to confine him to the infirmary for yet another night. He looked around his quarters with satisfaction. It was infinitely better than the infirmary and he was looking forward to sleeping in his own bed.

He swallowed his pills and grimaced slightly as he climbed between the sheets wondering how many more days it would be before the stomach ache faded completely. The anxiety wasn't helping and he wasn't actually sure how much of the pain was due to that, rather than the after-effects of the surgery. He took a couple of slow breathes, lay his hand across his tummy and tried to relax. Shuffling his shoulders approvingly into the mattress he snuggled down feeling pleasantly sleepy. However, before he went to sleep there was something he wanted to try.

'Jack?' he called out in a quiet but audible voice. 'Are you there?' He waited, hardly daring to breathe and unsure whether he should hope for a reply or not. He gave it a good couple of minutes then tried again. 'Teal'c?' Pause. Again, no answer. He tried visualising Teal'c's Kel'no'reem ceremony in case that might help, but it didn't. 'Sam?' he called, a little louder, trying once more but feeling increasingly silly. Nothing.

He wanted to feel relieved by the resolute silence, but strangely, the overwhelming emotion was one of disappointment. He hadn't exactly expected it to work, but still…

With a sigh, Daniel shut his eyes and prepared to surrender to sleep.

'You will find them Dan'yel' said a soft voice in his ear. 'Sha're?' Daniel mumbled in confusion 'but … but you are dead. I saw you die.' 'Yes my husband' she replied gently and Daniel felt her run her fingers gently down across his cheek. Her breath was warm as she whispered in his ear 'I am gone, but they are not. You will see them again.' Daniel tried to turn round to look into her face but something prevented him. 'How? …When?... What do I have to do?' he stuttered into the darkness, 'I've tried I...' Sha're pressed an unseen finger to his lips to silence him and in a voice so quiet that Daniel had to strain to hear whispered 'Be patient…be patient and wait.'