This chapter had been not edited.
She frowned, he smirked. She sat frozen, he fluidly walked. She did not do anything aside from being frozen on her spot as he approached her. Her fingers tightened around her glass as he flexed his to run his fingers to his gelled up hair. She looked at him then, really looked at him.
He changed as their surrounding changed with them. He grew darker as her night became lighter as it approached dawn. He is taller leaner that she can remember. His eyes though, his grey eyes turning a light shade of blue; it held too much bitter memories. The storm inside kept on going and going for years. The war was over yet the storm still rages on, never ending.
Grey did not meet brown again. Grey turned into blue instead.
His eyes turned a different shade of blue, it wasn't stormy instead all she saw was pain and coldness. That was not the shade of blue the blond had. The rage of continuing storm was gone and was replaced by coldness and hardness. It was his eyes. Her breathe hitched as she saw the transformation in front of him. Pain floured through her chest has the white turned to fiery red. The sharpness was gone. The pale complexion turned darker. He wasn't Draco Malfoy.
She stumbled back, the counter catching her on her fall. Her chest tightened as her eyes glued into his cold ones. He just stood there staring down at her, fist clenched by his side. It was getting harder to breath. The burning sensation was back at the back of her eyes. Her knees then gave in, the glass shattered into a million crystals. She can't even have a night full of numbness. He was always there, reminding her of what she had done. The pain she caused that ruined everything in between.
She didn't have the courage to look at him straight in the eye. She never dared to raise her head and look at him. It was not suppose to hurt. She did not love him like he wanted her to. She will never find herself loving him like he wanted her to. She fell in love with the picture perfect she painted of him. She never fell in love with him. The true him; the stubborn Quidditch crazed wizard he was and still is. She never did. She fell in love with what she wants him to be.
She loves him. For the love of Merlin she did. She will always love him. He was her best friend, the brother she always wanted, her supporter, her rock. Was. It is all in the past now. It will always be was or did. There will be no still or is. There is nothing left of her. Her two best friends despise her now. All she has is herself. Ginny and Pansy will leave her. They will not stay. They will leave her be. They have their own lives. Pansy will find the right man for her that will love her that will take her to places she never has been before. Ginny, she will eventually go back to Harry and live happily ever after like everybody around her. And she'll be alone. She will be alone broken and bitter.
She looked up and saw nothing. No red hair or blond in front of her. She was alone. There were no eyes that raged up storms that never cease. No eyes that would shoot shivers up by the back of her neck just by the coldness it held towards her. She was indeed alone. She blinked and looked around. Not even a single witch or wizard acknowledged her. She looked at the broken glass on the floor, shattered into a million pieces like how she shattered his.
Alcohol did wonders to her mind. Was it because of the alcohol she saw the man who haunts her dreams at night? Maybe it was or it was just insomnia. Hands trembling she pulled herself together and fished out a few galleons for the wizard who gave her numbing elixir.
She frowned at the glass and sighed, her attention turned to the wizard who was giving her a comforting smile.
"I'm sorry" she muttered stumbling out of the pub and into the darkness.
Pansy never expected an empty flat when she flooed to Hermione's flat. Relief and disappointment washed over her as she threw herself to the missing witch's couch. She was actually happy for her new found friend to leave the comforts of her home. She was too cooped inside her own cocoon that sometimes the witch would forget that reality is waiting outside her door.
Yet even though Pansy is happy for the witch she can't help but feel a bit disappointed. Hermione knows that she would come by and spend a few hours with her. She knew the witch isn't the person who would just fail to remember about a friend that she has plans with. It seems like she should wait for the witch to come back.
She had never expected to find comfort with Hermione. She had always looked at the witch in a wrong light. Her prejudices blinded so much when she was younger that she didn't even saw beyond her blood status on how great she can be.
When her friendship started with the witch, it felt like she was already part of the family. Yes, she might be ashamed of what she did from the past. Yes, she might feel left out sometimes especially if Ginny and Hermione talked about the war but she never felt like they intended it to leave her out of it. She never felt alone when it came to both of them. And she was grateful for that.
Her thoughts then went to the wizard who she ran into during her visit in Diagon Alley with Hermione and Ginny. It broke her. She felt a pang in her chest when he amusedly pointed whose company she was with. She didn't know what to label the feeling she felt that day. Now, alone in one of her friends' home, she realized what she felt. It was hurt. At first she thought she felt ashamed to have a friend like him but she wasn't ashamed at all. She was hurt. He was too quick to judge her. He judged her friends like before the war even started. She thought that he changed him especially. She never knew until that day how wrong she was.
She hoped that he did. She drastically hoped he changed his opinions just for her. Yet again liked she always did, she was dreadfully wrong. And it hurt and slowly it broke her just by thinking of him. She is broken and torn. Why did she even love a man like him?
Maybe she is wrong. Maybe he did change, not for her nor his family and friends but for himself. Maybe he was shocked and haven't fathom the idea of her being friends with the witches. Maybe he didn't mean any of it. Old habits do die hard. Maybe it was his instinct to act that way. Maybe he was caught off guard with the sight of Pansy with the Gryffindors. It was all maybes for her. All her answers about her questions, it will always come out as maybe.
She misses him though.
It had been months since they broke everything off. She didn't even know what to do without him when it ended. She always dreaded what every tomorrow will bring until she bumped into Hermione Granger and Ginny Weasley. Both women distracted her enough from him without them knowing and eventually she moved on. Yet she still missed him. Maybe his presence would be enough - - no, his presence would be enough; enough not to miss him like she does now.
She blinked. One second she was staring at Hermione's pastel pink wall now she was staring at Hermione itself. Her eyes widen as she saw what her friend's condition. Only clad in her nightdress and a cloak, Pansy knew she was about to lose it. Especially when she met Hermione's bloodshot eyes, she knew something happened when she was out.
Hermione Granger blinked and stood there for a second as her visitor stared at her with concern before she broke down.
She felt heavy, her head felt heavy and pounding. She tried to open her eyes but shut it close when she did. The light in her room was blinding. How did she even got inside her room? She can't even remember what happened right after she stumbled out of small pub. She only had five and a quarter glass of pure firewhiskey and she was already drunk. She had no tolerance for alcohol at all. She bizarrely found it amusing for her behalf, she can't even explain why.
She rolled to her side and slowly fluttered her eyes. She looked around and sighed when she saw Pansy fast asleep on a cushioned armchair at the corner of her bedroom. Seeing the witch images from last night flashed in her mind making her cringed. She actually thought she just dreamt about breaking down and was comforted by the sleeping witch. She sighed and slowly left her bed and walked towards the former Slytherin.
Shaking the witch gently, Hermione whispered her name until the witch slowly fluttered her eyes open. Once it was, it was suddenly awake and alarmed. Warm caramel studied her surroundings before it landed to the witch in across of it.
"Are you alright?" Pansy asked suddenly concerned for the witch.
Hermione smiled and nodded. "I was just wondering if you want to join me for breakfast."
She witch in front of her sighed in relief and nodded. Both of them having a silent agreement on not to bring up the events last night when Hermione managed to apparate back to her own flat and broke down right in front of her friend.
Hermione went straight to her kitchen as Pansy used her bathroom. Knowing what both witches want for breakfast, she grabbed some eggs from her muggle fridge and started to cook. Pansy emerged to tell her she would head out and grabbed them both some breakfast croissants from the small bakery just a few blocks away from Hermione's flat.
Hermione's Sunday started smoothly until her day ended. Pansy stayed until lunch before announcing that she would be visiting soon after she received an owl from her mother. After Pansy left, she spent half of her day curled up in one of her armchairs with a book in her hands and a mug of hot chocolate that would feel back up when it's empty.
Just for day she was contented and she was happy. She had a break what she wanted before she has to face the amount of work waiting for her inside the Ministry.
"I don't even understand why he would avoid me." Ginny moaned as she hid her face with both of her trembling hands. Hermione and Pansy weren't sure if the witch was trembling because of her pent up frustration directed to her lover or because she was upset with her lover. Both witches for one thing were absolutely sure, it was the latter.
Hermione bit her lip and looked down to her hands. Fiddling it she sighed and looked back up to the ginger. "Maybe it is because of me. He is still angry about Ron and I's breakup you know. I think he is mad because you chose my side than Ron's."
Ginny rolled her eyes as Pansy frowned at Hermione. "Rubbish 'Mione!" Ginny exclaimed with a horrified expression. "He doesn't have the right," she added.
"To be honest, if he is your best friend like you told Ginny and I, he should support your decision." The raven haired girl spoke up and finished of her own pastry.
"And even though Harry and I are together, it doesn't mean he can choose who I am friends with. So no Hermione, don't blame yourself. Just give him time, alright?"
The curly brunette just nodded, her finger tracing the rim of her tea cup. She doesn't get it though. Of all people who she taught would understand she thought it would be Harry. It doesn't sound like him when he doesn't hear both sides of the story. He completely jumped into conclusion that it's all Hermione's fault. He made it look like she didn't care about the relationship and didn't fight for it.
She didn't betray Harry hadn't she? If she did, it wasn't on purpose. Who in the right mind would betray Harry like that? She would never to that to Harry or Ron, even to Ginny and Pansy.
"I actually find Anthony Goldstein quite attractive." Pansy casually spoke up taking a sip from her tea, smirking.
Hermione frowned at the name. He sounded so familiar for Hermione yet she can't really point out who he really is. "Pardon Pans, but who it Anthony Goldstein?"
Ginny's eyes widened after Hermione asked the Slytherin and grinned knowingly at Pansy. "Hermione, Anthony is a year younger than me. Apparently, he is a Ravenclaw. Pansy is right, he is hot - - I mean attractive."
Hermione raised an eyebrow and turned to the raven haired. "Oh really know, Pansy? Are you even in contact with the young man?"
Pansy giggled and tucked a loose strand behind her ear. "Of course, mother. Would I pass the chance to not talk to him? We've been exchanging owls for about a month now."
The brains of the 'Golden Trio' gasped and glared at Pansy. "I so do not sound like a mother."
Ginny then snorted a laugh and grinned at the brunette witch. "I don't know Hermione."
"Seriously though!" Hermione stuck her tongue out at Ginny and turned to Pansy, completely ignoring the snigger coming from the ginger. "Well? Had he asked you for a date?" she asked quite thrilled about Pansy actually talking to a guy that made her happy. She smiled looking at the blushing witch right across of her. Pansy Parkinson must like this guy more than she would admit.
Draco Malfoy looked out of his office window and sighed as his companion kept on going about what he saw a few days ago at Diagon Alley. He was shocked alright but the shock he felt diminished a few days after Theodore Nott barged inside his office exclaiming that Pansy Parkinson had gone mad by befriending one of the most famous muggle-born alive.
He won't even deny that he thought Theo was lying and looking for a good smack on the face but he wasn't. He owled Pansy on the same day and received her reply the night after. He didn't even write back for he was left speechless by the witch.
"It is Pansy, Theo. You of all people should know what she is now. Leave her be." The blond wizard turned to face Theo and gave him a pointed look.
Draco raised his eyebrow as the raven haired wizard stared at him with disbelief. "I couldn't believe it. Are you actually taking her side on this? Malfoy for Merlin's sake she is a blood traitor now!"
Complaining about Pansy and her friends were one thing but insulting her as a 'blood traitor' in front of Draco was a terribly idea. For the first time since being calm around Theodore, Draco Malfoy snapped.
"Don't you even dare think or say that Pansy is a blood traitor. She is far from it and you know it!"
"If you don't want me calling your precious little sister a blood traitor, then shake some sense – "
"– can't do anything – "
"– try for Merlin's sake. You – "
"– listening to me. It's Pansy – "
"– has the mudblood's germs all – "
"– listen to yourself! It is not like you and her are – "
"– was! I still have the say on – "
"– don't! You aren't even together any – "
"– my friend and I don't want her to – "
"Theodore for fuck sakes, if you really are the friend you describe yourself to be then just let her be!" Draco sneered and glared him down. "If all you want to do is whine about Pansy being friendly with Granger and Weaselette then leave my office and stop bothering me!"
He didn't though. The other wizard stayed put and raked his fingers through his hair in frustration. He bit his lip and quietly grabbed his cloak. "She was once my friend, Malfoy. Knock some sense into her brain."
Draco just nodded and sat back down to his office chair and looked out of the window. He closed his eyes right after he heard the soft click of his door. He frowned grabbing his abandoned glass of Firewhiskey and taking a sip. Maybe it was time to visit the witch.
Gently placing the glass back down to his table, Draco stood up and grabbed his cloak before leaving his office. "I'll be out. Cancel all appointments I have. I don't care how important it is. Reschedule it." He informed his secretary who quickly nodded sensing he was in a foul mood. He wasted no time and walked straight to the apparation point.
He landed on his feet with a soft stud. He looked around and frowned. Pansy's flat didn't even change since his last visit a few months before. The only change he saw was a few new picture frames with her new friends. He walked towards it and grabbed the nearest frame.
His friend was laughing along side with the only female Weasley while Granger was sticking out his tongue at them before bursting out laughing, throwing her head back and holding her sides. She looked so alive and vibrant on the photo making him frown. He never saw the frizzy haired witch this happy back at Hogwarts when she was with Saint Potter and the Weasel or was it because when he sees her around the grounds she was always frowning and scowling at his direction? It was the latter though.
He was too busy studying their happy faces when he almost missed an audible gasp behind him. He turned around and his frown deepened.
"What the fuck are you doing here?" He heard the culprit ask with a sneer and a lace of surprise.
He leaned against the table at his left side and narrowed his eyes towards the witch.
"I should be the one asking you that, Granger."
And they crossed paths. OMG. hahahaha.
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-Sparks