(A/N: Hey, you all! Cake and ice cream to all those who review, fave and follow! Er, if you're lactose intolerant...I am sorry. By the way, this story WILL get dramatic at times, but I promise to make up for it with humor later on. But enough lip out of me. ONTO THE STORY, HUMANS!)
"Can I come?! Can I pleeeease come?!" begged Skoodge.
"NO!" Tak and Zim yelled at him.
It was Saturday. This was always the day Zim chose to do something really terrible. There was no specific reason for that...he just did.
The previous two days, he and Tak had stayed home from Skool planning the steal of the millenium. And what a steal it would be.
Fully disguised, the two Irkens and their SIR units left Skoodge at the base.
"TOOO THEEE MINIMALL!" declared GIR.
"I was supposed to say that!" scolded Zim.
XXXXXXXATTHEMINIMALLXXXXXXX
"So, we just walk in through the front doors?" asked a skeptical Tak.
"That is the plan!" Zim answered her. As soon as the quartet stepped through the automatic doors, Tak sighed for what seemed like the millionth time that week.
"I don't know why in the bloody heck I agreed to help you with this..."
"Believe me, Tak, it will benefit us both in the longru-LOOK AT THAT!" Zim had pointed to a large, inflated moose. There was a man standing in front of it, wearing a ridiculous moose hat. He didn't look very happy to be at work...
"Happy Moose Day..." he droned. Zim shoved him out of the way. He and GIR enthusiastically hugged the moose's inflatable legs.
"Mooooooose..." sighed the two.
Yes, today was Moose Day, a day when all moose-lovers and enthusiasts revel in moosey activities and snacks! And all non-believers are burned at the stake! Haha! Had Zim and Tak attended Skool, they would be creating moosey arts & crafts and such. And that's pretty much all you need to know about MOOSE DAY! WINK!
Tak shook her head as she approached the moose-huggers. It was pretty impossible to NOT think that they looked really adorable snuggling that moose inflatable, but these guys had a job to do.
"Come ON!" instructed Tak, yanking them away.
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Our, ahem..."heroes" were hiding behind a cardboard cut-out of Jhonen Vasquez in a corner. Mr. Vasquez himself was on the scene, signing a variety of moose merchandise to promote his favorite holiday, Moose Day. And yes, Zim, Tak, GIR and MiMi are all small enough to hide behind that cut-out and stay completely out of sight. They're that. Freaking. Small.
"Alright,"began Zim. He produced a small light fixture from his PAK so that they could see."GIR and MiMi, keep all of the people in the west side. Tak and I will move through the grates and steal 'the prize'. When we have it secure, we bust the security codes and we all run like the mighty Tallest Dickens. Any questions?"
GIR raised his hand and Zim nodded at him.
"Do we get ta get autographs from Jhony after?"
"Ugh, IF WE HAVE EXTRA TIME! Any OTHER questions?"
Tak raised her hand and Zim nodded.
"Why are you so happy about Moose Day?"
"Oh, the Earth meese are quite cute," he commented."You'd be astonished by what they can do to your walnuts!" Tak's holographic eyebrows shot up at Zim's idea of "cute". Suddenly, his green face became dead serious."BUT SOMETIMES...THEY FAIL YOU."
Tak chose not to respond to that.
"Any questions, MiMi?" Zim asked the robot.
"..."
"...None? Okay, then. LET'S MOVE OUT!" announced Zim. Everyone nodded.
GIR and MiMi stepped out into the open. They walked over to the signing area where all the people were. Now they just had to get all of them to move to the other side of the minimall. GIR thought and thought of a way to distract them. MiMi pointed to a poster with her holographic tail. It was a poster on the penalties of the anti-moose. GIR grinned, having gotten an idea.
"HEY!" he yelled. The entire crowd turned to stare at the little green dog and the demonic looking cat thing.
There was a long, awkward silence as the humans all stared at them, and GIR stared back, smiling. Finally, MiMi gave him a kick to jog his memory.
"Mooses are ugly and stupid!" he bellowed at them."I LIKE PIGGIES BETTER!"
The people all gasped.
"NON-BELIEVERRR!" shouted Jhonen, pointing at GIR. The crowd went into a frenzy and began chasing the two.
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Seeing that the coast was clear, Zim and Tak hoisted themselves into the minimall's vents with their PAK legs. They crawled, Zim in front, until they reached the area over where all the people had left. Luckily, the security was gone too. Zim opened the grate below him. He sighed dreamily.
"Ah...this reminds me of my day of organ thievery back in Skool..." he said in nostalgia. (A/N: I just love that episode, okay?)
"No time for over-romantisized memories!" Tak hissed."Where's the rope?"
"Right here!" Zim pulled a rope out of nowhere.
Choosing not to question any of this, Tak swiftly tied the rope around her waist and handed the other end to Zim.
"Don't drop me!" she warned him."Or we'll get caught!"
Zim rolled his eyes, but agreed anyway.
"Yes, yes, now jump out!"
Tak hesitated a bit, then leapt out of the vents.
"Ah...!" she squealed as she saw herself quickly nearing the floor. At the very last second, the rope pulled taut and Tak remained about two inches off of the ground. From above, she heard Zim snicker to himself.
"Not funny!" she whisper-shouted upwards.
"Shut up!" he called back."Do you want to get us caught?!"
"No, but YOU seem to!"
"Just GRAB it already!"
Tak turned back to "the prize". The GLORIOUS prize that you know won't be revealed until the end of the chapter! She grasped it tightly and freed it of its shackles. Then she pulled on the rope to let Zim know to pull her up, but unfortunately, he wasn't paying attention and let go of the rope.
"OUCH!" she exclaimed, hitting the floor. Suddenly, an alarm attached to "the prize" began to go off quite loudly. Tak gasped.
Elsewhere, across the minimall, the crowd was preparing to burn GIR and MiMi at the stake when they heard the alarm sounding. Realizing what was happening, they carried the stake, which GIR and MiMi were tied to, and headed to the source of the noise.
Within seconds, Tak saw them approaching and gasped.
"ZIM!" She looked up into the vent. Zim was gone. Her face twisted with rage."THAT...LITTLE..."
"GET THE THIEF!" cried a random guy in the crowd.
Tak took hold of "the prize", and ran like the mighty Tallest Dickens. He was the swiftest of ALL the Tallest!
The crowd was beginning to gain on her, and "the prize" was pretty heavy for its size. Just when Tak thought they would catch her, she was pulled around a corner.
"WHA-" A gloved hand covered her mouth.
The furious crowd passed by. How they didn't see her go around that corner, Tak would never know.
"Good. They're gone," said Zim, relieved.
"Zim?!"
"Do you still have 'the prize'?"
"Uh, yeah, it's here..."
"Excellent. Where's GIR?"
"And MiMi?"
"HERE WE ARE!" GIR exclaimed from right next to them. Zim and Tak jumped in surprise.
"But weren't you just...? How did you...?" stammered Tak.
"We escaped!" piped GIR. MiMi looked uncomfortable.
"Uh...never mind..." said Tak.
"ALSO excellent!" declared Zim."Onto the final phase!"
"TOOO MEXICO!" announced GIR.
"STOP STEALING MY LINES, GIR!"
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"So...this is authentic?" the clerk asked for the umpteenth time.
"YES. AUTHENTIC," Zim answered for the umpteenth time.
He, Tak, GIR and MiMi were in a black market in Mexico. They were selling off their prize...which was a moose. But not just ANY moose. This was the only living pygmy albino moose, and the MASCOT of Moose Day! Do you have any idea how much that moose costs?!
"Look, kid," sighed the clerk."who are you and where did you get authentic American Moose Day mascot?"
"WHA...I AM ZIM!" Zim shrieked at him."I AM OVER TWO HUNDRED YEARS OLD, AND YOU ARE GOING TO BUY MY MOOSE!"
"Yeah, okay..." said the clerk, a little weirded out. He pressed a few buttons on the cash register.
"So, how much is it?" Tak peered over the counter.
"Mm, about two million dollars," replied the clerk.
"CHIMICHANGA!" exclaimed Zim in surprise.
"You mean 'cha-ching'..." mumbled Tak.
Ignoring her, Zim turned to GIR, who was cuddling the tiny white moose.
"GIR~!" he said in a singsong voice. GIR turned to face him."GIR, we need the moose now~!"
"Awww, can't we keep it?" he whined, clutching it.
"GIR! GIVE IT TO ME!" yelled Zim, suddenly serious. He pried the moose out of his robot's grasp.
"NO! NOOOOOO!" wailed GIR as Zim sold it.
"YES! TWO MILLION DOLLARS!" cheered Zim, looking into his new suitcase full of money.
"Ooooh, money!" GIR chimed, stepping over to it. Zim yanked it away.
"NO, GIR! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" But he was a smidgeon too late. GIR jumped and ate the suitcase. Whole.
"Mmm, counterfeit-y!" mused GIR. Zim curled up on the floor, quivering. Tak frantically turned to the clerk's desk.
"Can we have a refund?!"
"Sorry, we're closed."
With that, the four were out the door and the market was locked up. GIR dragged Zim's limp body as they got up and they made their way back to the base.
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"Well, that was a complete failure..." muttered Zim.
"I wouldn't say that!" GIR offered. As if on cue, he burped up three fifty dollar bills. Zim caught them eagerly.
"MY MONEY!" he said, excited."My plethora of Earth currency HAS RETURNED!"
"And...you think that's two million dollars?" Tak asked.
"I think I know two million dollars when I see it, TAK! I'm quite good with numbers," he snapped."Oh...all the evil I can do with this..." He started kissing the money.
"EW..." Tak said in disgust."Well, money IS the root of all evil..."
"Here!" said Zim, holding out a bill."You get a third of it and I get the rest!"
"Uh..." Tak stared at the money."You were just kissing it, for crying out loud!"
"Just TAKE it before I change my mind!" Zim snapped again. Tak gingerly took the dollar. Yeah. It was definitely counterfeit... Zim stepped over to the toilet. His hands full of money, he pointed to the seat. GIR opened it for him and went down first. Tak heard Zim mumble something.
"What?" she asked.
"Zim thanks you for your help," He flushed himself down into the lab.
Tak stood and thought. Finally, she dashed over to the toilet and happily called down,
"Tak thanks you for the money!"
(A/N: Wow, that was long, and...really not as good as I planned. W'ever, it was still good! Hey, Dib hasn't been in the last two chapters! WHO MISSES HIM?!...no one? Oh, well. He'll be in the next one. By the by, if you're confused by ANYTHING, I promise, I shall explain later. Scout's honor! Well...review, fave, follow and check out my other stories. A tout a l'heure, mes amis!)