hey! just wanted to preface this by saying that this chapter didn't really come out the way i wanted it to. it was strangely difficult to write, and i'm not totally sure when the next one's gonna be up. i was going to merge this one and the next one together, but i figured it'd been too long since i'd posted a chapter, so here this is.

i'm sorry if its not great! like i said, it was hard to write, but hopefully things will be back to normal soon. :) thanks for reading so far!

One week later.

"So, what's on the agenda for today?" Pam asked, leaning over the table.

She, Jim, Kelly, and sometimes even Dwight had been eating meals together the past few days. It had all started a little while ago, when Kelly had been able to convince her to eat lunch with her and Ryan, and Jim and Dwight had just sort of ended up sitting with them.

It was nice. They weren't really a friendship group (or at least not in the same way as Pam knew from her experiences back in high school) but it was fun to have some people to sit with when having breakfast, lunch, or dinner. Although not everyone could eat at the same time due to classes and the like, she and Jim were mostly on a similar timetable, and Kelly was usually around.

"History, and then lunch?" He tilted his head tot he side, working out what time would be best so that everyone could be together. "At around 3? Because you have Art History, and I don't think Dwight can make it at that time, so that's obviously a big plus."

"Totally." She tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear. "Hey, can we have lunch outside today? The weather doesn't look too bad, and it should be warm…"

"Sure," he grinned. "I don't know how Kelly will react to that, though. The wind might mess up her hair."

"God forbid." Pam rolled her eyes. Kelly was great, and incredibly welcoming, but she could be a bit of a ditz sometimes. "Well, if she doesn't want to come then it's her loss. We can enjoy the fresh air together."

Jim smiled down into his coffee. It took her a minute to realise why, but then it hit her: this would be the first time she and Jim would properly hang out together, outside of class. Alone.

(And that guilt creeped back in. She still hadn't told Roy about Jim, instead referring only to "her friends" whenever she spoke to him about school.)

"You don't have to." She blurted out, not thinking. "I mean, if you really don't want to, then we can just sit with Ryan and Kelly inside…"

"No, it's fine." He assured her. "I like sitting outside to eat. It makes food taste better, weird as it sounds."

"I get it."

"So, it's a date then?"

Pam's eyes widened. "I - uh, no-"

"Figure of speech." Jim chuckled, shaking his head at her. "Relax." He was making a joke out of it, as he always seemed to be doing, but an expression of hurt flashed over his face, if only for a brief second.

After a particularly excruciating History class (involving three anecdotes from Michael Scott, one song clumsily performed on ukulele, and exactly twenty three questions from Dwight) Pam was heading back to her room.

Jim had asked if she could find some kind of blanket so they wouldn't have to sit directly on the grass, and she knew there was at least one unused blanket in a closet somewhere, so she agreed to meet him round the side of the Dunder-Mifflin building, at a spot down the slope of the large grassy hill.

She felt a little giddy, in a nervous way.

(Jim was… Cool. And not in the way Ryan could be considered cool, but more like the grunge, "cool kid" stereotype from 80s movies. He was easy-going; laidback. The type of guy everyone immediately liked. He'd already been invited to more than a few "exclusive" parties, though he'd declined most of them.)

Although she had tried to forget about it, Jim's words kept repeating themselves in her head.

Date.

He can't think it's a date, right? She thought to herself. We're just friends. He knows that.

After a minute or two of searching, Pam eventually settled on a big, ratty old towel. She figured Jim wouldn't mind, and she was going to have to get rid of it sooner later anyway.

The elevator took a beat too long to arrive, so Pam rushed down the stairs instead, bounding down two steps at a time. When she finally pushed through the doors to get outside, the sun shined into her eyes. It was almost uncomfortable, but as her eyes adjusted she realised it wasn't too bad - she'd just been inside for a long time, and it was, after all, a very nice day.

Jim stood at the spot they'd agreed on. He was carrying a grocery bag, so Pam supposed he must have just arrived. He waved when he caught sight of her, grinning as she approached.

"I brought an old towel instead," she informed him, flapping it out before setting it on the ground, carefully.

"That's fine." He lifted the grocery bag apologetically. "I couldn't find a picnic basket, unfortunately."

"You didn't bring one?"

"I forgot," he shook his head, somehow maintaining a completely serious face. "I packed one before leaving, but I must've left it in my friend's car."

"Disappointing, Jim. Everyone knows you need to pack /at least/ 2 picnic baskets before moving off to college." She sat down slowly, not wanting to fall.

Jim followed suit, kicking his long legs out in front of him. "How many did you take, then?"

"7." She said sincerely, grinning triumphantly when Jim burst out laughing. "You broke first!" She exclaimed gleefully. Usually, when they were joking around, she was the one to break.

"I concede. You win," he held up his hands, surrendering.

"As punishment, you shall set out the food." Pam ordered, knowing fine well that that was what he was going to do anyway.

"You're ruthless." He replied, but emptied the grocery bag onto the makeshift picnic blanket anyway.

It wasn't really anything special; just some cafeteria food wrapped in tinfoil to keep it warm. He'd managed to get her her favourite mixed-berry flavoured yoghurt (how he knew that, she had no idea), and a couple of sodas for them both. It was a little overwhelming, but she convinced herself she was just happy to have such a good friend at this new school.

(She'd never admit it out loud, but Roy hadn't actually put any real effort into any of their dates since around their second year, and Jim reminded her of how it actually felt to be with someone who actually cared about dates.)

"Is that sufficient?" Jim asked, keeping up the joke.

"I suppose," Pam replied, inspecting the parcels of food wrapped in tinfoil.

"I wasn't sure what you would want, so I got a hamburger as well as a grilled cheese," He sounded apologetic.

"Grilled cheese sounds great," she grabbed the rectangle-shaped parcel and unwrapped it, grinning when the smell wafted out. It was still quite hot, but she ate in silence nevertheless.

"It's so quiet, without having Ryan or Kelly or Dwight around." Jim remarked after a moment.

Pam cocked her head to the side, chewing thoughtfully. "I guess." She agreed, once she was done. "I think it's nice."

"It is, don't get me wrong." Jim assured her, leaning back, propping himself up with his arms. "Just, we hardly ever hang out together, you know? Outside History, I mean."

"Well, Kelly's always around." Pam shrugged, taking another bite of the grilled cheese. "And Dwight's always trying to get you to confess to something or other."

(It was true: just the other day Dwight had stormed down to the cafeteria during lunch, demanding Jim confess to putting his stapler in jello. Pam had found it incredibly funny at the time, but Dwight only got more annoyed. Jim mouthed along when Dwight exclaimed his token "Dammit, Jim!")

"We should do this more often, though. Don't you think?"

What does he mean by that? Her thoughts were whirring. "Sure."

Jim's phone went off, so he paused for a moment to check it, frowning. After, sliding it back into his pocket, he asked suddenly: "Do you want to go to this party on Friday? It's a little way out of town, but I can drive, if you want. My cousin's throwing it, apparently it's his boyfriend's birthday or something."

Oh. Was he asking her out? We're just friends. He knows that.

"I, uh…" She stuttered, not really knowing what to say. She knew she had to tell him about Roy, but how could she do it without embarrassing him? He was her best friend, and she really, really couldn't bear to lose that.

"I'll need to ask Roy, first." She lied. "My boyfriend. I said we could do our weekly video call on Friday, but I can probably reschedule." She watched him carefully, waiting for his reaction.

"Oh." He cast his eyes downwards, but only for a moment. Soon, he was back to normal again. "That's fine. You should text me, we can arrange something."

Pam was glad he didn't seem bothered. Maybe there really wasn't anything there.

They exchanged numbers, and the rest of the lunch was spent mostly in comfortable silence, punctuated by jokes or anecdotes about Kelly and Dwight.

In the end, Pam had to leave in a rush to make it to Art History on time, so she quickly said her goodbyes, scooping up the old towel in her arms.

"Thanks for this," she grinned, and, on impulse, leaning up to plant a kiss on his cheek.

Jim's eyes widened a little, but he kept his cool. "Hey, you're welcome. I, uh, I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Sure." She nodded. "I'll text you, about the party."

Jim looked as though he might have forgotten about the party for a second, before snapping out of it. "Oh! Yeah, sure. Let me know, I can drive or whatever. It's not too far, just outside town."

"Alright." She shifted the towel in her arms, playing with a loose thread distractedly. "Well, I'll see you tomorrow! I've got to go."

"See you tomorrow!" Jim grinned as he watched her go.

(Maybe if she'd turned around, she would have seen how he ran a hand down his face, and shuffled his feet. Maybe she'd have realised that of course Jim wasn't fine at all.)