Third chapter of this story! It may end soon, maybe the next chapter, or within the next couple. Hopefully, my heart can take more devastating songs as inspiration for this. Hope you enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of Merlin.
It was well into the evening when Arthur arrived at Morgana's house, but the warm glow of her living area's lights still shined past translucent curtains. He could see her blurred form coming to the window before she drew the curtains back and saw him standing next to his car, his belongings at his feet.
Arthur watched as Morgana immediately ran from the window, the curtains flickering back to their original position, and waited for her as she opened her front door and approached him at a quick run. He opened his arms to her numbly and caught her as she threw her arms around his neck, both her hands cupping the back of his head.
"Oh, Arthur," she whimpered, and Arthur blinked as he noticed her tears for the first time. He held her, staring blankly ahead at Morgana's green lawn.
"I'm alright," Arthur whispered. "I'm alright."
In a short moment of retrospect, he knew it was pointless to say that. Morgana, his mother, everyone knew he was not alright. Even he knew. Who would be in this situation?
Still he said it, repeatedly, absentmindedly wondering if he was trying in laughably obvious vain to convince her or himself.
Morgana sniffed and pulled away, quickly wiping at her face before smiling, her lips quivering with the effort. She wasn't wearing makeup. "Let's get you settled in," she said, grabbing the handle of his suitcase. He nodded, grateful that she had not asked him anything more or made him speak of the circumstances that led him here or, God forbid, how he was feeling. He was sick of feeling.
So it was with a numb body and mind that he followed her into her warm house, closing the door behind them.
xXx
"Do you ever think about the future, Arthur?"
Arthur turned his head to look at the man next to him.
They were lying in the meadow behind Merlin's house, a peaceful serenity settling over them after they finished the mini-picnic they had. The wheat-woven basket, long since emptied of its contents, sat forgotten at the base of the large oak tree they were under, the red and white checkered blanket was underneath them.
Arthur frowned, but his brows pinched together in amusement. "All the time, why?"
Merlin turned to him, his blue eyes glittering with mirth. "What do you see in your future?"
Arthur scoffed, smiling playfully. "Well, I see myself going to the loo in about ten minutes-"
"Prat!" Merlin laughed, swatting at his boyfriend's chest while Arthur chuckled. "You know that's not what I meant!"
"Well, what do you see, Merlin?" Arthur grinned, rolling onto his side, towering over Merlin as the other boy.
Merlin's smile turned from playful to pensive, reaching up and tracing Arthur's jaw with his finger. He exhaled deeply, and said, "... I see you."
A fierce warmth erupted in Arthur's chest at these words, filling him with a such a strong essence that could only be love for the man beneath him. It was then that he knew he loved Merlin, and God, he loved him so dearly.
"Well, what do you see?" Merlin whispered, his words echoing in the silence between them.
And if he was honest, Arthur already knew. He knew what was in his future. But he didn't say.
Instead, he smiled softly, and pressed his lips to Merlin's in a tender kiss.
What do you see?
What do you see?
Well, what do you see?
Arthur sat up in bed, his breath caught in his throat. After a moment's panic of trying to get his breath back, a sob was ripped out of him, an explosion in the otherwise silent house. And then he couldn't stop.
Frantically, he searched his bed, his eyes flickering rapidly from side to side, hands sliding across the mattress, trying to find that warm, living body that was just there.
"No..." he mumbled, tears cascading down his face hotly, breathing harshly. "No... No, no, no! Bring him back! Give him back!"
"Arthur, Arthur!"
Somewhere in the midst of his panic, Morgana appeared in front of him, her hands hot on his cheeks, a bewildered expression in her sleep-deprived eyes. Arthur sobbed once before swallowing, trying to speak.
"I... I saw him, Morgana! I saw him!"
"I know, Arthur. I know," Morgana nodded, her brows furrowed in worry. "It was a dream, Arthur. Just a dream."
"No, Morgana," Arthur wailed, trembling hands reaching up to clutch her wrists firmly. He ignored Morgana's wince. "You don't understand, I saw him! I saw... I saw him. I saw Merlin."
His voice quieted down to a whimper, and his grip faltered on Morgana's wrists as he fell into her. Morgana was silent in her comfort, hugging his limp body to her, rubbing his back and arms soothingly, stroking through his matted blonde hair. All the while, when he could get a coherent sentence out, Arthur kept sobbing, "I saw him... I saw him..."