They stopped talking and start paying very close attention to their rebelling, food throwing little princess the second I walked into the kitchen. Reaction I could only hope had nothing to do with me having an epic case of bad hair day…

"Morning," I mumbled.

"You look… different," said Ella. In tone that made me think this was not her way of pointing it out.

"You've seen me looking worse," I said, yawning.

"You do, you know?" added Thomas. In tone just as strange.

I looked from one to the other and sighed. "Right. What were you two talking about when I walked in?"

"Nothing," they said. Both at the same time, and before I was even done asking.

"Ella…?"

"It's just that… You used to do this thing. Every night since the curse. And these last few days you just… stopped," she said in the end. Not meeting my eyes.

"What thing?"

"Oh you know. When you sleep you… you sometimes…"

"I… talk," I said, knowing well that the appropriate word would be scream.

They both gave me very enthusiastic nods, and I decided to just take their word for it. I didn't have enough energy for anything else, anyway, and they looked a bit too pleased to be making this up. I was not feeling particularly conversational, not to mention I still needed at least two cups of coffee to be able to speak in full sentences, so I just shrugged and laid my head on the table.

Of course I wasn't about to tell them that all the changes that so pleased them were caused by a crazy scientist, elderly werewolf, manipulative Fairy and not-strictly-speaking-sane Hatter. Because I couldn't. For reasons that I didn't fully understand, they kept using the words fight club…

"Any plans for today?" asked my sister after waiting what she considered appropriate amount of time after I started sipping my coffee – so barely seconds. Probably to prevent herself from commenting on what a progress I was making, even as I sat here, sleepy and incommunicative, not prepared to face twenty-first century today.

Having my coffee withheld until I answered, I found myself telling her that I did. Something that sounded suspiciously like a job interview amongst them. Missing the times when I could just wander through the woods living of roots and berries and the occasional squirrel stew, I still decided to give this twenty-first century idea about women working for a living a try. Mostly because I knew how pissed off my mother would be if she ever found out – after all the speeches she gave me, about how all I need is a rich husband, preferably with a title to go with his wealth…

And the worst thing? That was just one thing of many. That's been happening to me a lot lately.

Yesterday it was poker night at the convent Blue dragged me to, day before that I was babysitting, what was really just a codeword for watching Labyrinth with Grace. After the years during which I had only the occasional mome rath for company, it was… interesting to be around people again. So interesting I was starting to think about my future in this town, even though it seemed to be constantly in some kind of danger.

At least there was no ball yet…

"Where are you off to?" asked Ella, when I got up. "I thought you have some time before…"

"I do. But…" I said, that simple word heavy with meaning as I gestured towards my hair. She smiled and let me take Alexandra from her arms.

"Aunt Dru looks like a witch, doesn't she?" I said, as the little girl reached for my curls with her chubby hands. "Which is not a good look in the town looking for a witch that cursed it. So she'll better get some magical help, and fast."

"Oh, you mean…"

"Exactly," I nodded.

Thomas only looked at us, confused. "She used to have this magic ribbon for when she needed to look presentable," explained Ella. "She wore it on the ball too… Though I haven't seen it in years. Where do you think it is?"

"The pawnshop, probably," said Thomas before I could. "If it's magic, that is."

"Oh it was. And pretty strong one. It had to be," I grinned.

Then I pulled a hood over the mess on my head and headed for the door praying that he was right and I would find it in the pawnshop. And reminding myself for most of the way that its former owner was no longer around. Which didn't help much. It was just so hard to imagine that that particular nightmare of my homeland was gone for good.

That there was no more helpful advice he would give me, and I had to follow, no matter how certain I was that I was only becoming more and more involved in his plans as I did. And the worst thing about it was that I couldn't really hate him. Not because I knew how much more there was to his story, just as there was to mine – but because I would never escape the first curse if he didn't warn me. Now that there was no chance ever to find out why he did it, I found myself lost in the memory of that moment. In the dark, underground corridor, with a cell at the end…

Knowing what I knew now, about his death, his sacrifice, I was filled with the strangest feeling of… well, of loss, as I reached the door of his shop full of curiosities.

"Anyone here?" I asked, not hoping for an answer, and just barged in.

And got a feeling of déjà vu that almost knocked me off my feet…

I've never been here before. I was in Storybrooke barely two weeks and I did my best to spend them staying away from everything magical. I only glanced at this place on my walks. And yet – I knew it.

I saw it before.

"Can I help…? Drusilla?"

I turned towards the source of the voice, too lost in the confusion of memories to make my usual comment about what I think about that name and what I did to people who used it. And had another shock, seeing who called me by it.

"Belle? What are you doing here?"

It took me one look at her face to know that that was a long story. Which I had no doubt about. The last time I saw her she was a quiet, bookish girl, engaged to nobleman by the name of Gaston, who just happened to be a perfect example of why local upper classes really should do something about their genepool.

She spent next few minutes trying to answer my question. It was quite a tale. It left me speechless, and when she finally got to asking me what brought me here I wasn't too quick to answer, seeing how trivial my problem was. But in the end I took off my hood and just showed her. It was guaranteed way to win her sympathy…

"I really need to find that ribbon," I said after telling her about it.

"Oh… Well… I don't think you should be afraid people will take you for a witch. You look more like… Merida," she said, almost smiling.

"Is that a Disney thing? It sounded like Disney thing."

"If you weren't here for the first curse, how do you know about Disney?" she asked, as she led the way to the back room.

"Hatter told me. Long story… moral of which is, that I can get much more out of people if they're drunk. Or I'm drunk. Preferably both."

We started searching. And talking, which was a new thing, since I now recalled I knew her back when I was… my or less wicked.

I found myself liking her. Not sure if it was her real self or her Storybrooke-self, and not caring. We managed to kill almost an hour searching.

And then I made one tiny mistake…

"How did you know there is a safe behind that painting?" she asked with undisguised shock in her voice.

"Oh… I…"

I turned to her, considering. And realizing I better just tell her.

"I saw this place before. That's… another long story," I said. And had pretty good idea how she'll take it, knowing her history with Rumplestiltskin now.

But not telling it seemed not to be one of my options anymore.

I used to be so good at keeping secrets… I kept a whole life, everything about me, hidden from my mother for years. And now? I wasn't in this town for two weeks yet, and I felt like there was no chance I'll have any secret left by the end of this month.

And still I started telling her.

"Do you know about the contracts he used to make? Of course you do… And that my sister signed one too?"

She nodded. I took a deep breath and hoped I'll be able to get through this fast.

"The night she found out just what she promised him for his help, she told me. And I did the only thing I could do. I got a fast horse and headed for Rumple's castle. I was…"

"You were going to kill him," Belle finished for me.

There was no judgment in her voice, so I knew she understood. It wasn't about what I was going to do – it was just that I wasn't going to let him get my niece. Even if it meant I had to kill him.

"Many tried, you know that. But… no one got as close to succeeding as I did. I had a special weapon. That's a different story, what you need to know is that if he didn't give me a good enough reason he would die that night. And he knew that too. He knew I was coming. Didn't try to run. He waited for me. Telling me right away he can give me a reason not to kill him. He can show me the future – the way he could see the future… He can show me how Ella's future will look if I let him live," I said, feeling cold as that memory came back to me. "And then, he took my hand and shared with me a vision. He showed me this place. This shop… On the night Ella broke in to steal back her contract. He showed me that she would succeed. He showed the day my niece was born… and the deal he made that day. With Emma Swan." Which was his end game all along, I didn't have to add.

"And you believed him?" asked Belle, clearly surprised.

"I did. I can't explain why… But I felt it was what's going to happen one day. It seemed all… predestined."

I moved away from the safe, continuing my search. But after a moment spent in silence I felt it necessary to add, "It was reason. It shouldn't have been good enough, and I knew it. He was still the Dark One. He still caused so much pain – and I had the chance to prevent him from causing any more. But… he didn't lie to me. And something about that future I saw… It gave me the feeling that he had a very good reason for doing it all. Just as good as my reasons to kick open his door and put a knife to his neck."

"He did," she said very quietly. Her voice had pain in it, the kind I never knew, and there was really nothing I could say to her then, so I didn't.

Just kept searching through cabinets and boxes, though I no longer cared about the state of my hair.

"And he paid me back for it anyway," I said later. "For sparing his life."

"He did?"

"He told me how to escape the first curse. Which had probably as much to do with not wanting me around to mess with his plans as anything else, but… I suppose that now I'll never know for sure. All I know is that he drove his jailors mad, asking them to send me a message. In the end they did. I came to his prison and he told me about the curse. Everything I had to fear from it. Others would get cursed lives, you see, and be miserable – because there would be some part of them, deep down, unchanged, and yearning for the lives they've lost. And so will I, but… the curse would remake me, worse than others. It would make me something I never was, no matter what the world believed."

"The wicked stepsister," she said, catching my meaning.

"I would be everything my mother wanted me to be. And after the curse broke, he said, those memories, all twenty-eight years of them… they just might drive me mad."

She had nothing to say to that, so she just hugged me. People did that a lot lately, and I'm not saying I was getting used to it, but there were moments when I could almost admit it was not unbearable.

"I'm glad that didn't happen," she smiled for just an instant.

I smiled back and went back to searching in the dusty boxes. Until I heard my name being called. Not my full name, which I appreciated.

"Was it green? Your ribbon…"

"Yes. Somebody decided it was my color," I said disgustedly. I never looked good in green. But maybe this once I could, I realized, as I took from her the ribbon. The ribbon.

"Dru…?" she said after I hid it in my pocket. "How did you? Escape the first curse."

"Oh… I went to the Dark forest. It wasn't far enough to be entirely safe, but it was so full of unicorns and gryphs and dragons – things that were magic – that the forest itself wasn't affected by magic as much. The purple mist still came, of course. Came and went. But didn't take me…"

"You were in the Dark forest?" she said, her eyes widening with surprise. "For twenty-eight years?"

"Well… yes. Not after the time started moving again. I went home to Sherwood then," I said, shrugging my shoulders. Seeing that that detail made it no less impressive.

"Thank you. For the ribbon. I'll be back. To help you sort out through all this," I promised. "But now I have to run."

"You do?"

"Oh yes. I'm late, I'm late…"

"For a very important date?" she asked, amused.

"You can say that," I said and headed for the door. Because, as I realized looking at my clock, I really was.