Adam gave Dean a bright smile when he walked into The Roadhouse, and Sam gave him a frown.

"Where have you been?" the older one demanded while the younger one gave him a happy hug.

Dean tousled Adam's short hair. "Hi, Adam. Nice to see at least one of my brothers knows how to find his way to a barber."

Sam gave him Bitchface: Classic Edition. "Whatever. Shut up. You're just jealous."

Dean rolled his eyes. "Yeah. If I were to decide to grow my hair out, God Himself would weep at how awesome my body and shine is."

"Whatever," Sam said. "Cas is back in the corner with Bobby and Ellen."

Dean looked over and saw the Angel with his other family. They were talking easily and it warmed his heart. He wanted Castiel to stick around, so the fact that his family seemed to have accepted Castiel already.

"Here he is!" Ellen said happily when Dean walked up, her tail twitching. She stood and kissed Dean's cheek, giving Bobby a significant look as she walked away.

"Well, I'd better check on that thing you were telling me about," Bobby said in the most non-obvious way possible. Dean wanted to laugh.

"Heya, Cas."

Castiel looked up, but didn't meet his eyes. "Hello, Dean."

Dean sat down and Jo appeared out of nowhere with his burger and beer. "So, um, did you have a nice day with Sam?"

"Sam and I met for lunch, but then he needed to go back to work at his law firm. I took your advice and read a lot."

"I know. I know what you read."

Castiel looked so guilty that Dean wanted to hug him.

"It's okay, Cas. But you have a right to know some things about me. If you and I…if we decide that this thing between us is something we want to keep going, then you deserve to know some things about me."

"Dean, you don't have to do this. It's none of my business," Castiel started, but Dean cut him off.

"Cas, I don't want you to doubt that I like you." He took a deep breath, then chanced a look at Castiel's face. The Angel was smiling down at his hands, but his blush was what Dean focused on the most. He wanted to kiss those pinked cheeks. "I know you feel it too," he murmured, drawing closer to Castiel and putting his hand over the Angel's. "We're drawn together."

Castiel nodded. "Yes, Dean. I'm afraid almost of the attraction I feel towards you."

Dean tipped Castiel's chin up and looked deep into his eyes. "Don't be afraid of me, Cas. I won't let you down. I'm loyal, I swear to you…"

Castiel gulped and licked his lips nervously, and Dean felt an overwhelming urge to follow the path of the Angel's tongue. Keeping eye contact, he dipped his head forward and lightly pressed his lips to Castiel's. It wasn't a huge romantic gesture, there was no tongue and it was almost over before it started, but it was one of the best and most erotic kisses Dean had ever shared with anyone.

Around them, the bar exploded into applause.

"Finally!" Adam shouted, making everyone laugh.

Dean turned his head to his audience, embarrassed and amused, giving Sam and Adam his best "Die you two face."

"We should get out of here," he said to Castiel. "We can go back to my place and—shit! No, not like that, Cas! Not…"

Castiel stopped him by pressing his fingers to his lips. "It's okay, Dean. I know what you mean. I don't want an audience either."

Dean nodded. "I'll go find Ellen and get some boxes for us."

At the house, Castiel took Dean's hand and led him up to his bedroom. They both wordlessly shed shoes and clothes until they were in boxers and T-shirts, then hunkered down in the bed together. Dean loved the way Castiel slid under his arm. It felt like he belonged there.

"So tell me," Castiel said.

Dean lifted his hand and stroked lightly down Castiel's back. "When I was a kid, my mom died. Adam was just a baby, Sam was a toddler. I was young. Eight years old. My dad just…he lost it. He'd been a Hunter all his life, he was born into it. So was my mom. Most of our books represent several generations' worth of collecting and writing about the supernatural. Well, after Mom died, Dad started Hunting for real, and I was sort of left to take care of Sammy and Adam."

Castiel looked up at him. "But you were a child."

"I know," Dean said. "But at the time, I thought…I thought I was so much older than everyone gave me credit for. Ellen was always yelling at Dad that he left us alone for too long, and Bobby would say that Dad gave me too much responsibility at too young an age, and I got mad at them for saying that because…because he was my dad, I guess."

Castiel put his hand on Dean's chest. "He is your dad. You love him."

Dean snorted. "I worshipped him. I thought he was…I thought he was Chuck Norris, man. He was larger than life, he was a hero and amazing and I thought I was part of some huge, heroic quest that he was on to find the jerk that ganked my mom."

"It's okay, Dean," Castiel said, leaning up to kiss his cheek. "You did a good job. Sam and Adam are fantastic people. But I'm sorry that you were forced to be their father in that way. You deserved a childhood too."

Dean looked down at Castiel and smiled sadly, knowing that what he said was true. He had deserved a childhood, and the fact that Castiel could see that and not judge him or want to fix him or want to put his father down was amazing. Victor was always telling him that his dad had done a terrible job and had turned Dean into something less than he could be. Overwhelmed, Dean leaned down and kissed him again. This one was longer and full of more meaning. He loved the feel of Castiel's lips against his. They were soft and slightly chapped and sweet. He tasted like the burger he'd been eating.

"Well, then my dad joined the Wild Hunt. I was fifteen at the time, and my dad disappeared and…" Dean sighed. "I started doing bad things. Stealing, drinking, doing drugs. Nothing too hard or dangerous, but enough to get me into trouble. I dropped out of school and Ellen and Bobby actually wouldn't let me see my brothers until I got sober. That was my wake-up call." He pulled Castiel closer. "I'm not proud of what I did or who I was, but I stopped when the thing that was most important to me, family, was threatened. I love my brothers, and I'll do anything for them. So I started trying to get my life turned around, but I was a little too late. There was a cop. Victor. He…started paying attention to me."

Castiel looked up. "How old were you?"

Dean smiled ruefully. "Too young. Seventeen. We shouldn't have. We both knew it. But we did. Before you judge him too harshly, you need to know that he got me straightened out. He helped me get my GED and get off drugs. I was never addicted to drugs or alcohol, but it was a few years before I would trust myself with anything stronger than root beer."

"And he died."

Dean shrugged. "He didn't just die. We started fighting when I was about to turn twenty. We had always had fights, but we really started fighting hard then. He would say things about my dad, about the way he raised me. If I wanted to Hunt or even just go to The Roadhouse, he'd say that I was being a good little robot like my daddy trained me to be. I'd tell him that this was what I wanted to do, that it gave me purpose, and he'd argue with me, try to talk me into going to college.

"Eventually we started drifting apart and Adam and Sam would stay with Bobby when he was here. I knew I needed to choose either my family or my boyfriend, so I chose my family. Victor was killed in the line of duty five months later."

The angel slid into his lap and his arms were full of Castiel, his body surrounded by him. He thought he felt something soft like wings against his face as Castiel wrapped his arms around his shoulders, but he didn't see them. "I'm so sorry, Dean."

Dean pulled him away and smiled at him. "Don't be sorry, kiddo. He was too old for me, and it was really and truly over. It was good for what it was, but…you don't—you're not in competition with a ghost. I loved him. But not anymore."

Castiel nodded. "I'm glad to know that."

"There's one more thing," Dean said, squeezing his eyes shut. "Then there was Benny a few years later."

Castiel went stiff. "You don't have to tell me about everyone you've ever slept with."

"Why, you have somewhere else you have to be?" he tried to keep the mood light.

"I mean it. The past is the past."

Dean nodded. "I agree, but you need to know why…you need to know why we can't be together yet."

"What do you mean we can't be together yet?" Castiel started to move out of his lap. "Why do you keep pushing me away?"

Dean grabbed his thighs and tried to hold him there. "I'm trying to tell you. Please, just listen!"

Castiel nodded. "Okay."

"Benny was—is—a vampire. He and I just sort of hit it off. Well, we were going pretty strong. He had gone through his Awakening and was doing really well, drinking donated blood, the whole works. And then his family…" Dean gulped. "His hive started having trouble. There was lots of in-fighting, and one guy made a bid for Alpha, then there was a huge fight. Benny sort of got in the middle of it and it ended up with him becoming the leader of the hive. Because of that, he felt he should choose a mate from among his species, and he broke up with me."

"Wow," Castiel breathed. "Wow, that was…he was an idiot for letting you go."

Dean tried to give him a cheeky smile. "His loss, your gain?"

Castiel shook his head. "So you think I'm going to come through my Awakening and just…give you up?"

"I'm just saying it's happened, and I don't want to get in your way. I don't want you to—"

Castiel put his fingers against Dean's mouth. "Shut up, Dean. Don't do this. You and I, we have something here, and if I start thinking about leaving, then I have a right to know that it's going to hurt you!"

"I wouldn't want to get in your way—"

Castiel held his face and forced him to look directly at him. "Get in my way, Dean. You have a right to get in my way. If you like me, then you need to come and get me and not try and martyr yourself like you're doing me some kind of favor."

Dean had enough. He started trying to dislodge the Angel from his lap, but Castiel was stronger somehow and overpowered him.

"Let me go!"

"No, I'm not letting you go!" Castiel managed to grab his wrists and hold him down, his strength more than Dean could fight against. How was he doing this? "You have the right to tell me you want me and expect it to mean something to me, Dean."

Dean turned his head away, not wanting to see the earnest expression he knew was on Castiel's face. He wanted to trust him. He wanted to believe that Castiel would choose him. Dean's track record said otherwise, though. They all left. They always left. It was just something about him that made them leave.

Castiel let go of his wrists and lay down next to him. Dean's arm curled around Castiel's shoulders of its own volition. He could get up and leave, go to his own room and shut out the Angel. But he didn't. His head knew that Castiel would not stick around, but his heart seemed to want to hope. Like a fool, he held on tight to that little ray of hope.

}O{

Castiel woke up in Dean's arms. They had slept together for comfort more than anything, not touching other than to hold each other and share a few sweet kisses.

In the quiet of the early dawn, before Dean awoke, he was able to think over everything they had said the night before, and he realized that he was going to have to prove to Dean that he would still be there tomorrow and the next day, and the day after that, and every day after that until the end of time. The only way he could do that was to just be there, no matter what, no matter how hard he might try to push him away. Castiel felt he was up to the challenge.

He rolled onto his back and smiled as Dean followed his movements, snuggling against his side.

"You awake?" he asked, running his fingertips over the soft hair currently tickling his shoulder.

"Sht'p," was the sleepy reply.

Castiel tightened his arms around Dean's shoulders and enjoyed the opportunity to hold him. He'd had no idea that the Hunter could be such a huge cuddler. The night he'd lain down with Castiel after the nightmare, he'd just patted Castiel's back for a while, then fallen asleep on the other side of the bed. Now his long, heavy, muscular length was laying half on top of Castiel, and one of his legs was slotted between both of Castiel's. Castiel stroked his fingers lightly over Dean's arm where it was flung over his chest and clasped his hand, lightly lacing their fingers together. To his surprise, Dean brought Castiel's hand to his mouth and kissed it, then went back to hugging him, their fingers still entwined. A smile ghosted over Castiel's lips at that, and he closed his eyes again, supposing that just laying there and enjoying Dean's warmth against him was good enough for anything.

When he woke up again, Dean was lying beside him, propped up on an elbow, chin in his hand, watching Castiel with a smile playing around his lips. Castiel returned the smile, reaching up to trace Dean's soft lips with his fingers. Dean opened his mouth and bit down on one playfully, making Castiel laugh, then leaned forward and kissed him. They both had morning breath, but Castiel didn't care. He'd kiss Dean's lips if they were covered in dirt or worse.

"Hi," Castiel breathed against Dean's lips.

"Hi back. You ready for breakfast now that it isn't the ass-crack of dawn?"

"Yeah. That sounds good."

They showered and dressed in their separate rooms, then met at the stairs, descending together. In the kitchen, Adam was frowning at a cookbook and holding an egg in one hand.

"Whoa, whoa, what do you think you're doing?" Dean asked, rushing to his brother and grabbing the egg.

"I was going to cook you breakfast, asshat." Adam stuck his tongue out at his brother, then turned to Castiel. "Good morning, Cas."

"Hello, Adam. I thought you were still staying with Sam and his girl?"

Adam shuddered. "You two are quieter."

Dean shoved his brother away from the table. "There was nothing to be quiet about, jackass."

"Oh," Adam said, blushing. He looked so uncomfortable and clearly had a thousand questions running through his head, but simply sat down in a chair and frowned instead.

Castiel sat next to him and nudged his shoulder. He hadn't really had a chance to talk to Adam at all, so he looked forward to a chance to help the kid out of a predicament. "Have you ever known someone going through an Awakening, Adam?"

Adam nodded. "Yeah. My best friend in high school. He's a demi-god. Son of Aries. Apparently he's had three prior lives, and he died horrifically in each of them."

"Are you two still friends?"

"Yeah, we're actually going to hang out when I come home next weekend."

Castiel smiled. So there were people who went through Awakenings and still retained old friendships. He turned to look at Dean, who was breaking eggs over a bowl, but only got a frown in return. Dean apparently knew what he was thinking, but it didn't seem to make him happy. Castiel frowned back, making Dean startle a little, then go back to his batter mixing, shaking his head slightly. Whether it was at himself or Castiel was unclear.

Castiel turned back to Adam who was watching him with a bemused expression. Adam pointed his eyes to Dean, then rolled them and gave a shake of his head and a smirk while mouthing the word "Idiot." Castiel smiled in response.

Castiel decided to ignore Dean while he prepared breakfast. His plan to be there for the Human—his potential boyfriend—was going to entail a lot more than simply hanging around all day. He had to get Adam and Sam and even Jess (though he hadn't met her yet) on his side, and doing that meant getting to know them. He'd already started with Sam, so now it was time to learn all about Adam Winchester. They talked about how hard it was on Adam to be the youngest, to have two brothers who treated him like a perpetual baby (which earned him a snort and a sippy cup of milk from Dean, who refused to say where he procured said sippy cup from), how hard it was growing up without a mom (silence from Dean during that), but then Adam took the time to praise Dean's brotherly skills, pointing out how he was always there for him through thick and thin and how Dean had encouraged him to go for his dream of being a vascular surgeon and how Dean and Sam were paying for everything even though Adam didn't want them to.

"You'll be taking care of us in our old age," Dean teased. "That's how you'll pay us back when you're a rich and famous surgeon."

Adam snorted. "With the high-fat, high-calorie, high-carb diet you eat, Dean, you'll be lucky to make it to forty-five years old," he shot back. "Doesn't sound like you're going to be making good on your investment."

"Die young, make a pretty corpse," Dean smiled, piling pancakes onto a plate and setting them down in front of Castiel. Castiel looked up as Dean leaned over him and their eyes met for a long moment. Dean leaned down and kissed his forehead before turning back to the stove. Castiel watched him for a moment before turning back to Adam who looked both amused and wistful.

Castiel shot Adam an apologetic look before turning his attention to his pancakes.

They were eating breakfast and talking companionably about Adam's plans to join a fraternity when someone frantically started pounding on the kitchen door.

"Dean Henry Winchester, I know you're in there!" a woman's voice rang out sharply.

Dean looked alarmed and opened the door quickly. "Missouri, what's—"

A small African-American woman pushed her way into the house, not sparing a glance at anyone other than Dean. She was slightly out of breath and her eyes were wide with concern. "No time, Dean! No time! Jessica! She's in trouble at her house. You have to go now and take Castiel and Adam with you, and you mustn't be afraid of what you must do. That's all I know!"

Dean nodded and Castiel opened his mouth to ask how this woman knew what his name was, but she started pushing his shoulder before he could.

"Don't you hear me, boy?" she asked Castiel sharply. "You need to go now!"

Dean grabbed Castiel by the arm and started practically dragging him out of the house. "C'mon, if Missouri says it's trouble, then it's trouble."

They were in the car in seconds, sitting tensely with worry.

"Missouri is a Seer," Adam said. "Not like Sam, she can have visions at any time, and she can read your mind if she wants to."

"Yeah, there aren't many like her," Dean agreed, taking a corner so fast that both Castiel and Adam slid across their seats. Adam ended up on the other side of the backseat and Castiel ended up tucked tightly against Dean. He moved away from the Hunter reluctantly, earning a slight flicker of the eye from Dean. In the backseat, Adam uttered a curse and stared balefully at his phone. He'd been trying to call Sam or Jess to no avail.

"Try Bobby," Dean commanded, skittering another corner, this one slamming Castiel against the passenger door. Dean seemed to be the only one in the car not effected by the centrifugal forces he was causing.

"Bobby!" Adam shouted into the phone. "I'm sorry, I'm sure you are. Yes sir, I know how early you went to—Bobby, you know I wouldn't be calling if it weren't important!" Castiel glanced to the backseat and found Adam holding his head in one hand. "All I know is that Missouri told us Jess is in trouble and we're on our way there now. Yeah, I can't reach her or—we're here now. Just please, we might need you."

He disengaged the phone and threw it down on the seat, hopping out of the car before it even properly stopped moving. Castiel exited more slowly and watched with morbid fascination while Dean and Adam pulled an arsenal from the trunk.

"What about him?" Adam muttered, sheathing a knife in his belt.

"He's got mojo of his own," Dean said, pulling the magazine from his gun and knocking it a few times against the handle before loading it back in, releasing the safety, and cocking it. "Let's go. Don't be afraid to do what you have to do," he shook his head. "I hate ominous sounding shit like that."

Castiel gulped at Dean uncertainly. "Dean, if I…try and kill me before I go Avenging Angel, okay?"

Dean frowned and pulled Castiel against him. "Don't be afraid of what you have to do," the Hunter said gently before giving his cheek a peck. "C'mon, let's go find out what's got Jess."

They literally broke the door down. Dean didn't even try the handle to see if it was unlocked, he just kicked the door and it fell forward. He and Adam stalked in, brandishing their guns, following the sound of a menacing voice.

"…abomination inside of you, did you? You think because you spread your thighs for him like a good little whore that you get to keep him? That you get to undermine everything that I have been trying to do for him? My life blood flows through his veins and he will be so much more than the sum of his breeding, and I can't have you distracting him from his purpose!"

They rounded on the kitchen to the sound of flesh meeting flesh and a woman whimpering "No!" over and over again between sobs.

"Filthy bitch! You've tainted—"

"Azazel!" Dean shouted hotly when they finally found the source of all the noise.

A large fairy had a beautiful woman—the woman from the pictures on Dean's mantel, Jess, presumably—against the wall with his forearm at her neck. His other hand was at her belly. She was crying hard and her face was pink from being slapped. A bruise was forming on one cheek.

"This isn't your concern, Dean. This is about Sammy."

Dean actually growled. "How many times do we have to tell you that Sammy isn't your child?"

Azazel dropped Jess and she crumpled to the floor, clutching her stomach. The Fairy stalked slowly towards Dean, his eyes glowing yellow. "Your brother is more my child than he is yours, Dean-o. It burns you up, doesn't it? Knowing that my blood flows in his veins!"

Dean leveled his pistol on Azazel, steadying it with both hands. "Sam chose his family," Dean said with finality. "He's heard your pitch a million and one times, and he is never, ever going to accept your gift. Give up before it's too late."

Azazel smiled a sickeningly sweet smile, his teeth too big and white, his jaw too well defined. He looked almost like a cartoon of a man. "That was before a group of Lamia broke into his house and murdered his girlfriend, his poor, innocent unborn son, and his two brothers."

"Hey, Azazel!"

The Fairy turned to Adam, who he had been ignoring for far too long, and got hit with a faceful of sugar.

"Dammit!" he roared. "Look what you did you little shit-faced throwback!"

Adam nodded to Dean as Azazel bent and started counting the grains of sugar, collecting them in his hand as Adam and Dean started some strange ritual. Castiel turned his attention to Jess, who was still whimpering and holding her belly while lying on the floor in the fetal position. Castiel was surprised to note that he heard not just her elevated heartrate, but the struggling beat of something much tinier, more vulnerable.

…innocent unborn son…

With sickening realization, Castiel put the Fairy's words in context. Jess was having a miscarriage! She was pregnant with Sam's baby, and…

He rushed to her side and cradled her head in his lap, placing his hand over her perfectly flat belly. He got a flash in his head of a golden Angel noticing a large cut on Castiel's leg. He'd gotten it in sword training when Uriel struck him while their instructor's back was turned. The Angel scooped him up from behind, his hands behind Castiel's knees as he held the fledgling in front of him in a sitting position.

"What happened to you, little brother?" the Angel asked in a smooth voice.

Castiel sniffed. "U-uriel cut me," he whimpered.

"There there, little one. It's not so bad."

Castiel looked up and back as the unknown Angel stroked his wild curls, then got suddenly shy. "Y-you're Luthifer," he stammered and sniffled. "I'm thorry for bothering you, Luthifer. Mithtreth Naomi thays we muthn't—"

"There there, little one," Lucifer soothed, still petting him. "Don't worry about me. Let's show you how to heal yourself, okay?"

"B-but I don't have any powerth yet!"

"Shhhh," Lucifer crooned, lifting the hurt leg. "I won't let you get hurt. You're Castiel, right?"

Castiel nodded. Lucifer pronounced his name strangely, "Cas-chell" instead of "Cas-tee-el."

"Well, listen, Castiel. We have Grace within us, and it does as we tell it to do. Now close your eyes and tell your Grace to go into your cut. It will listen."

Castiel obediently closed his eyes, surprised to find his Grace there and waiting for him to direct it. He showed it his cut and felt the pain and the wound leave. He peaked under one eyelid and gasped at his smooth, sun-browned leg, unblemished by any cuts or bruises.

"Thank you, Luthifer!" he cried, turning to hug the Archangel, who chuckled deep in his chest.

"You're welcome, little one," Lucifer said fondly, giving Castiel's hair one last comb-through with his fingers.

He hefted Castiel to the ground and went off, waving happily, the Light following him and glowing off of his tunic and golden hair, his wings fanning open as they fell in pairs down his spine. Away from them were two of the other Archangels, Michael with his dark hair and long purple cape over his tunic, and Gabriel, his red cape skewed over one shoulder, tunic hitching up at one knee. Castiel barely had a chance to glance at Gabriel's brassy red hair before he was snapped back to the present.

"I know what to do," he told Jess, his hands stroking through her hair the way Lucifer's had stroked through his. "You'll be all right, Jessica."

Large brown eyes stared back at him, frightened but trusting. She gave him a nod, and he closed his eyes, feeling his Grace just below the surface, like his wings, right there. He showed the Grace the fetus, and he felt it go out of him and into the child, surrounding it, strengthening it, repairing where it had started pulling away from its life force. Castiel remembered how it had felt with Lucifer when his wound had healed, and pulled away from the fetus before it became too much of a drain on his Grace, and came back to himself, somewhat proud that he was still conscious. Jess was still staring at him, her mouth opened in an "O" of surprise. And then something dark and red splashed onto her forehead and she sat up quickly, reaching out for him as he fell into oblivion.

Adorable baby lisping Castiel! You're so cute and cuddly and I'm sure Lucifer wants to take you home with him! OMG, I'm just imaging him with missing front teeth and wild, messy hair and it's killing me! (Cassifer? What Cassifer? Shut up. _)