Thank you so much emma . Ray, best beta-reader of the world. She has suffered through numerous cases of "this is shit" and "I don't feel this one" so gratitude.

I apologise for all the liberties I took with historical accuracies in this chapter. I fictionalised A LOT for it to work quickly and develop the plot faster. Please don't rant saying that it's really unrealistic : I KNOW.

I started this chapter to have fun and erm it was the hardest to write since I started (I know, only 2 chapters ago but still)

Finally… Please don't hate me.

Dominus : master
Ludus : gladiator school
Primus : Main fight, usually one on one.

"I wanna see sweat, tears, bruises, blood! " screamed the man.

I grabbed my wooden swords and put myself "en garde". The myrmidon who was facing me didn't stand a chance - I advanced swiftly, taking advantage of the fact that she was powerfully built, as the creatures of the North are sometimes, and I slid easily between her clumsy legs. With the hit of an elbow on her back, I threw her off and brought her down with a smack of one of my swords that swept her calves. I brandished a sword on her throat.

"Beg for mercy!"

My companions of misfortune applauded and formed a circle around me. The dominus was observing from his seat and seemed satisfied with my fast performance. Nevertheless, the slave master gave me a dressing-down.

"Gottesman! In the arena you have to make the show last, people have to bet, shout, root for you, you just make it seem so easy!"

Gottesman. It was hard getting used to being called by that name. I had changed it when I arrived here, the name of McCullers being too recognisable. I lowered my head, trying to hide my half-smile and stretched my arm towards the Northerner who grabbed it and brought me down on the floor next to her. We laughed for a brief moment until the master slave cracked his whip.

"In your sheds you soft testicles! You have to be ready for the games of Saturnalia tomorrow! Gottesman, dominus wants a word with you."

Four years had passed since I first arrived in this ludus, training relentlessly, winning fight after fight in the arena to move closer to my goal. It was the only way for me to reach her, to be in her presence, to get past the militia hired by Alison since my failed assassination attempt a few years ago. I had managed to flee and to build myself a life here in Mediolanum Santonum in Gaul. My voluntary servitude in this mixed ludus was survivable only by the simple thought of my goddess. I knew she was still alive, receiving unfortunately seldom coded letters from Ezra. It was my only opportunity.

Saturnalia was beginning tomorrow and I knew that she would be present during the primus. From what Ezra had told me, she never left Alison's side. I needed to participate in this fight, the DiLaurentises -and especially Alison - were the distinguished guests of this female fight that was putting two of the most renowned ludus in competition with each other. Her family had mainly paid for the construction of the city's arena and their presence was expected in the city as if the emperor himself was coming. I moved forward in the atrium's direction where dominus was waiting for me.

"Sit. Samara, pour some wine to our star gladiator."

"Thank you dominus," I answered.

"Well well Paige, I see that your training is paying off. It is time for you to finally fight during the primus and cover my ludus with glory during Saturnalia. The Tigress of Mantua, again and again undefeated…"

I had gained this nickname after my 7th victory in the arena, but never had I received the honour of fighting during the primus. I had naturally lied about my origin, not wanting my parents to find me or worse, giving Alison an opportunity to organise her revenge, but my reputation was beginning to cause me some trouble regarding the conservation of my anonymity. Numerous people were coming from afar to see me fight and I was afraid of being unmasked before being able to save my goddess.

"Thank you dominus, I shall bring honour to the house of Germanicus."

"Go get some rest. I shall send Castus to keep you company a little later."

"Gratitude dominus but I- "

"Or maybe would you prefer that Samara joins your bunk tonight?"

I had already been rewarded repeatedly by the honours of dominus but I had always declined with the most deference to not insult the man. My noble appearance had allowed me to be taught how to fight right away, contrary to other young women who had had less chance, thus I had never had to lay with anybody. The women gladiators were a rarity - we were less strong than the men and we met our end faster. It was doubtless for that reason dominus had kept me for Saturnalia. My speed and my endurance made me an asset, and it was not certain that I would have emerged unscathed from a previous primus against multiple opponents. And even fights against men if the opposing ludus had bribed the games' masters.

"I-… erm…"

"Samara, accompany Paige to her cell and tend to all of her desires."

"Yes dominus."

Samara led the way. She had arrived to the ludus only a few months ago. She had been a slave all of her life and was given to dominus to pay off a gambling debt that a patrician owed him. She was delicate and had many skills - she had taken care of a lot of my wounds which had barely left a mark on my skin. She was one of those people who look at you and do not need words. Her heavy past could be guessed by looking into her big blue and sad eyes. Her long fair braided hair indicated that she came from a tribe in the North.

We arrived at my cell, a simple room containing only a bed and a small table. A bath had been prepared and the steam that was coming out of it was delicately warming the air. Samara closed the door and approached me slowly from behind. She carefully untied my shoulder straps, and it gently made my plastron slide as well as the top of my tunic. I shivered under her delicate fingers and pulled away from her in the direction of the bath.

"You can leave," I said, my back turned in her direction. "You don't have to stay."

"I know. But it is not because dominus ordered it. I want to stay."

I turned around to look at her and saw that she had lowered her eyes, almost in a shy way.

"Samara," I said slowly. "Gratitude for your care and your support but I-…my heart already belongs to somebody and I cannot…I don't want…to share my body with anybody.

She raised her blue glance towards me and looked at me with infinite sweetness, as if she had just understood why I was there at this moment and why I had always refused all the favours given to me by dominus. I felt like Penelope waiting for Odysseus and staying faithful despite all temptation and pushing from others.

"Do you not wish comfort tonight?" she asked.

I did not answer, settling with a shake of the head. The thought of my goddess was never leaving me. She was present, perennial. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw her, a few inches away from me. I felt her skin touching mine when she passed by me. My heart was carried away only to die out a few seconds later, the painful seconds that my head needed to return to the cruel reality. Samara sat down in a corner of the room, her eyes looking at the ground. Understanding, she had let me finish undressing on my own, but I saw in her outlook that she was a little confused. Maybe my attitude had made her previously believe something else, maybe she was sad for me. I climbed in the hot water, eager to remove the sweat and the blood that covered me from head to toes.

"What is her name?"

I did not know how to answer. Not because I was ashamed of this Sapphic love, but because I ignored the name of my goddess.

"I do not know of her name," I said in a desperate sigh. "I only saw her once before she was torn away from my sight."

"Is it for her that you are a gladiator?"

"Yes. It was the only solution so that I can pull her away from the claws of a harpy and for us to finally be together."

Only silence followed my confession. I thanked her mentally for not having asked more questions, although her investigation revived again the so short-lived but nevertheless ardent souvenir of our "meeting". I got up and Samara approached with a towel. She remained silent, lost in her thoughts.

"Did I hurt you?" I asked her, worried.

"You did not, don't worry."

I choose not to ask to her for more. The orders of dominus were clear and I did not want her to feel obligated to answer me.

We stayed silent for a few moments while I dried myself.

"Are you afraid for the primus tomorrow? Well I mean…the Tigress of Mantua is never afraid of anything," she said, half worried. Half teasing.

"I would be lying if I told you that I do not feel at least a small apprehension. But I have to win this fight at all costs."

"I shall pray for you Paige."

She did not ask for more. The fabric rolled up around my waist, hair falling on my breast, I headed to my bed as an invitation for her to leave me alone. I needed to be on my own, to concentrate for tomorrow. To pray so that my goddess would be present and alive. I stopped half-way, seeing Samara approaching me. She took my hand, put a chaste kiss on my cheek and left my cell. I lay down, eyes wide open, and rehearsed my plan for tomorrow. Win the primus. Keep my helmet at all costs. It shouldn't be difficult as it is my trademark. Receive the price from Alison's hands in the evening. Entice her to a room. Cut her throat swiftly. It was my only chance to bring an end to everything, to pass her security detail, to find myself in her presence with a restricted guard. To be able to kill them all. Then find my goddess. Run away with her.

I fell asleep on these thoughts, sending a small prayer to Venus for her to take pity on me.

"TIGRESS, TIGRESS!"

The crowd was chanting my name but I wasn't hearing anything. I was in the underground passage, head pushed in my helmet, eyes focused on the gallery which was standing opposite of me. The name of the gladiator I was going to face in single combat had been revealed to me a few minutes ago. Shana. Gaul's most renowned Moor - and of all the Roman Empire. Bets were on me losing 10 against 1 but I was inhabited by a fire that the betters could not suspect. My goddess was there, I knew it. I entered the arena under the roarings of the plebs and walked towards the gallery. The delirious crowd started to scream Shana's name who joined me. We moved forward and I saw her.

She was standing behind Alison and her parents, the benefactors of these games. She was as beautiful as the first time I saw her. Her hair was sophistically pushed up in a bun, her dress was beautifully revealing but maybe too much as some bruises were noticeable. I felt my blood boiling. I had to save her, whether she wanted me or not wasn't even the question, I had to save her from the cruel hands of Alison.

Shana and I took the Roman gladiator's oath and went our way, each on one side of the arena. I took out each of my swords from their sheaths while Shana equipped himself with her trident and net. Great. A Retiarius. I loathed this kind of fight. Retiarius were generally heavy women whom my speed as well as my fitness allowed me to by-pass easily, but the sharpness of Shana was going to make all of this impossible. She moved quickly, starting to turn around me. I turned my swords slowly, playing with my wrists, offering her access to my left side. Come on Shana, take the bait…

She launched a lightning attack, opening my left thigh, while I slid on the side and struck her a blow from the backhand of my sword on the spine. She moaned in pain while I by-passed her to avoid her net. I had to be extremely watchful - although the trident was a heavy weapon to use and therefore was slow, its amplitude could easily put me in trouble. I threw a quick look to the stand. My goddess was still there and she was looking at me with attention. She was alive, present, so accessible. Shana took advantage of my lack of concentration to grab her net back and try to imprison me with it. I cut the object quickly and advanced, head lowered, towards her. Enough playing Moor. I feinted towards the left, taking support on my wounded leg - which made me grimace - and all at once lively, taking Shana aback, I pushed her trident with my right sword and landed the left in her breast.

The delirious crowd shouted "TIGRESS TIGRESS" but I paid no attention to it. I advanced to the stand with a firm step, waiting to receive the laurels, to affirm my victory, to be sure everything was according to plan, when Alison got up and outstretched her arms to silence the public.

"The DiLaurentis family honours the city of Mediolanum Santonum with these exceptional games. This year, the gladiator who won the primus has the honour to fight a creature coming from Mauritania. A felines' fight - the tigress of Mantua against a lion!"

I could hear my heart freezing into my chest. Everything around me had stopped. I couldn't hear the crowd, I couldn't feel the warm sand between my toes, I couldn't focus on saving her anymore. I knew it was a common thing in certain arenas but nothing had prepared me for this "surprise". I had no idea how to beat these animals. The railing raised and a majestic creature entered. Gleaming hair, a lively expression, looking irritated, probably from the hunger it had to undergo to have appetite for me and be angry enough to attack. The lion saw me, probably smelling the blood which was running from my leg. It rounded his back, putting itself in an attack position. It was here, in this moment, the eyes of my goddess turned towards me, and nothing mattered anymore. I could just die here without having any regrets, for I had tried my very best to save her. Or I could kill the beast and free her from another one. May Mercury grant me the speed and agility to be victorious. I took a run-up and ran in its direction. It was it or me anyway, so better end it as fast as possible. A skid and I could tear his neck up easily. I had only got so far when my left leg gave way under my weight and I found myself on the ground. The lion threw itself on me, tearing my shoulders up with its claws and lowered its head a few inches away from my face. Its mane changed into long fair hair, its snout became refined, its features became human. And it is Alison whom I found above me. "I own you now," she whispered.

"Paige, Paige, wake up in the name of Jupiter! "

"NO, NO, NOOOOOO!"

Ella was above me, shaking me to wake me.

"Paige, you are having a nightmare, wake up!"

"I...what…"

I was all sweaty. It took me a few moments to recognise where I was. My room in Pompeii, my bed. Ella. I started to cry.

"Paige, what is it? "

The soft voice of our oldest slave and of the closest thing I had to a mother figure invited me to confide in her. I knew that all I shall tell her would stay between us so I told her everything. She listened to me carefully, asking me questions here and there, and I saw the despair growing on her face while I told her of my divine vision. I narrated her my dream, how far the gods had inspired me to help the one who had stolen my soul.

She looked at me tenderly and said: "You have to fight for what you believe in. You have to fight for her."