I've decided to change the name of this fic and update the summary cause it's been bugging me for a while. Hope I didn't confuse anyone.

This can be read as the continuation of chapter 15: Textbooks and Breakups.

Warnings for character death and NSFW themes.

Toushiro wasn't handling the break-up all too well. Even he could admit that to himself. He had left the World of the Living with a small bag full of the stuff he had accumulated at Ichigo's apartment over the years. Ichigo had hugged him when he left and then shut the front door with a heavy click. Toushiro had given back his key. He clutched his bag to his chest and swallowed harshly against the tight feeling in his throat. He tried to remind himself that this was for the best. It wouldn't work between him and Ichigo. It would be best if Ichigo got to have a normal life with people that would age and grow alongside him. When he got back to the Seireitei, he went straight to his quarters, sat on his futon, and cried. Braking up with Ichigo was the most sensible thing to do, but of course it also hurt the most.

He tried to pull himself together for work, but the absence of his scatter-brained, red-headed boyfriend – ex-boyfriend had his eyes growing watery every five minutes and made his thoughts impossible to wrangle.

"Captain, are you okay?" Rangiku asked him, as she set a cup of tea on his desk.

"Yes." He cleared his throat and stared at the field report he was editing.

"What happened?"

"I said I was fine."

"You're obviously not. Does it have something to do with why Ichigo hasn't been visiting?"

He took a deep breath and his vision went blurry. He braced his forehead in his palm and set down the report. "We broke up." He hated how small his voice sounded.

Rangiku gasped softly. "What? Why? You both looked so happy."

His throat burned and constricted. "It... it wouldn't have worked out." He tried to clear his throat again. "Not while he's in the World of the Living and I'm here."

Rangiku sighed and he felt an arm around his shoulders. She didn't have to say anything else.

He took the next day off; something he hadn't done in years, and slept for most of it. He didn't feel like doing anything. There was an Ichigo-shaped void in his life now and he didn't know what to do to get rid of it. If only he had been born in a different time, a different place, or if Ichigo had come to him centuries sooner, or even later, maybe it could have worked. He clutched his pillow to his chest and stared at the wall.

Ranigku came to bring him lunch. Momo dropped off some cookies. He didn't touch any of them. He knew his should have felt hungry – he hadn't eaten since yesterday – but he didn't. When the setting sun began to bathe his room in yellow-orange light, he realised that he had been in the same position for the entire day. He slowly sat up and scrubbed his hands down his face. This was ridiculous, an entire day wasted because he missed Ichigo. His vision grew blurry instantly and he roughly wiped his eyes with his sleeve. It wouldn't have worked, he growled in his mind. There was no use mopping around like he had. It wouldn't make things better; if anything he felt worse than he did yesterday. He took a deep calming breath and slowly got to his feet. It was the best decision he could have made. Ichigo deserved better.

Weeks passed, he found that he had no appetite, he had trouble sleeping, and he couldn't concentrate on his work. Rangiku tried to cheer him up – she bought him a green tea sampler, a box of amanattō, she even did her share of the paperwork without complaining and offered to help him with his. She offered him some saké on a few occasions. He considered taking up her offer. Momo tried to be helpful as well, and Ukitake sent over a couple baskets of candy. He was grateful for all their help; he just couldn't find it in himself to show it, though Rangiku assured him that he would feel better with time.

A few months after the breakup he was finally starting to feel a bit better. His chest still ached when he thought of Ichigo and he still had trouble sleeping, but at least he could force himself to focus on other things.

Then, late one Friday night, when he had stayed at the office to finish a report, the door slid open and heavy, determined footsteps came up to his desk. Toushiro, recognised the reiatsu instantly. His heart leapt with mixed emotions – a spike of happiness, but then dread, sorrow, and anger.

"Ichigo," he said, straining to keep his voice level. "What are you doing here?"

Ichigo took a deep breath and tried to grin, but didn't quite make it. "You look rough," he sighed, "when was the last time you had a full night's sleep?"

"What are you doing here?" Toushiro tightened his grip on his brush.

Ichigo fixed him with a fiery, brown gaze. "I came here for you."

Toushiro's heart jumped to his mouth and his stomach fluttered, before he remembered why this could not happen. "Ichigo, I told you-"

"That reason's bullshit and you know it. I don't care about our differences, they don't matter."

Toushiro rubbed his temples, feeling his eyes grow watery. "It does matter, you shouldn't have to wait on me, you shouldn't have to grow old with someone who doesn't age like you do. You deserve better."

"I don't want better."

Toushiro covered his face, feeling the first teardrop fall down his cheek. "Ichigo, please, you're making this harder than it has to be."

"It doesn't have to be hard." He stepped close enough to wrap an arm around Toushiro's shoulders. "I'm here now; we don't have to go between worlds."

"You'll have to go back eventually."

Ichigo hesitated. "I don't... not anymore."

Toushiro whipped his head around to stare at Ichigo. His eyes widened and he felt his stomach sink to his feet. "Y-you..." he paused and shook his head, "You don't mean what I think you do. You can't."

Ichigo smiled sadly. "I'm sorry."

Toushiro continued to shake his head. "No... how? When?"

He shrugged. "I think it was a car accident... the bus flipped over, I'm not sure how. I wasn't the only one who died, though."

Toushiro turned sideways in his chair and placed a hand on Ichigo's cheek, running his thumb across the bone. "Ichigo..." he sighed, closing his eyes briefly.

"My family knows what's up, it's not too sad, though my friends at the hospital..." he swallowed, "I stayed for the funeral... it was touching." He took a deep breath. "That was three weeks ago. I would have come sooner, I should have but-"

Toushiro wrapped his arms around Ichigo's neck, rising to kneel on his chair.

"I thought you needed space," he mumbled into Toushiro's neck. "I asked everyone who knew not to tell you, I wanted to do it myself, but... you broke up with me... I couldn't... I wasn't sure." He wound his arms around his waist and shook his head slightly. "I want us to work, Shiro, and if it took my death to do so then that's that."

"I didn't want this," Toushiro felt his throat clamp shut, "You were supposed to live, find someone else that suits you, that you could start a family and grow old with. You weren't supposed to die."

Ichigo tightened his embrace. "Who are you to decide what I'm supposed to do? I wanted you – I still do – and now you don't have an excuse to keep me away."

"Ichigo,"

"I'm not going anywhere."

Toushiro took a deep breath. "I don't want you to."

He felt Ichigo's breathing hitch, and the next thing he knew his lips were on his.

The kiss was salty.

It was gentle and tentative at first, but after a few moments Toushiro was overwhelmed by the fact that Ichigo was here with him. He stood up, still on the chair, so Ichigo had to stretch onto his toes. Toushiro buried both hands in his hair, deepening the kiss. Ichigo's arms travel upwards from his waist to his ribs before pulling Toushiro from the chair and flush against his body. Toushiro held on to him wrapping his legs around his hips and clutching his shoulders. Ichigo settled his arms under Toushiro's thighs.

"I missed you," Ichigo mumbled, rubbing his nose to Toushiro's.

"Me too."

"Those were the hardest months I have ever been through."

Toushiro's stomach churned. It wasn't his intention to cause Ichigo more pain. "I'm sorry-"

"None of that, not right now." He pecked Toushiro's lips, catching the bottom one between his teeth.

"You started it."

Ichigo chuckled softly before kissing him again.

...

It was almost morning, but neither of them could sleep. Toushiro rested his head against Ichigo's chest listening to his heartbeat. Strong and steady. Their bare legs entwined under the sheets and Ichigo's arm was loosely draped over Toushiro's waist.

"I guess you're stuck with me now," Ichigo mumbled, kissing the top of Toushiro's head.

"It would seem so," Toushiro yawned.

"I told you we could make it work."

"You are insufferable, Kurosaki." He reached for his hand and twined their fingers together before bringing their joined hands to his lips and pressing them to Ichigo's knuckles.

The full NSFW version can be read on my Tumblr - link is in my profile.

Thanks to Nico Zi for this prompt!

Next is Chibi Envy Chan then Airaly

Donations are still open- one prompt per review please!

-Mymomomo