Chapter 2 : Rumbled
A/N. FiascoWay here. Thanks to everyone who took the time to leave a comment. One guest reviewer, Bella, expressed an interest in a f/f take on Jane and Lisbon. While this story doesn't deliver on that, I highly recommend googling "Crimson & Clover (over & over)" by the wonderful writer LaurytheLatrator. The story is located on another fanficton site and is everything you could wish for.
Once Jane thought he knew what was going on with Lisbon he was lulled into a false sense of complacency. He might be able to spot the flaw in someone's most cunning plan but his supreme confidence in his own abilities often prevented him from re-thinking a conclusion despite the mountains of evidence piling up.
So it was he blithely enjoyed Lisbon's company without being concerned by the little oddities that started cropping up. They no-longer met at her house, for instance. Lisbon also appeared to be on a health kick, her visits to the gym with her exercise partner occurred more frequently and it was commonplace for Lisbon to surface all hot and sweaty from a lunch or early evening session.
The look she'd given him when he'd presented her with a cat toy for "the special someone in her life" had also been a little odd. Perhaps she didn't like being outed as a cat lover.
In any case Jane had no reason to complain. Lisbon was far more serene, almost zen like when they worked on the case. Sure, it helped that Fischer or Abbott had to deal with the bulk of the complaints but it was also a fact Lisbon was much more relaxed and open to new ways of doing things. Thinking about the catalyst for the sea change, Jane had to metaphorically doff his hat to Felix. That cat had certainly made a difference to Lisbon's life. If it had been practicable, he might have considered getting one of his own.
It was an accident in the field that precipitated Jane's enlightenment as to the true state of affairs. A pursuit of a perp through a forest had resulted in Lisbon twisting her ankle. At first it had seemed minor and she'd waved off Cho and Fischer who were taking in the fugitive for questioning. It was only when she'd jumped into her own car that a bolt of agony shot through her ankle.
There was nothing for it but to let Jane drive. Still a prisoner to her tough cop persona, Lisbon waved off any suggestion of going to Emergency. On the ride back her new found calm deserted her as she berated Jane for her predicament. The day's activities had caused a flare-up of an old wound she'd suffered when one of Jane's pranks resulted in her being knocked over by a stampede of prospectors.
Jane was more than happy to let the argument rage on, anything to distract Lisbon from her pain. Even so his friend had fallen oddly silent towards the end of the trip. She seemed, withdrawn, edgy. Sensing her discomfort he'd clammed up as well. Memories of their rift were still fresh enough to make him tread with a little caution.
The second he pulled up outside her house, Lisbon had the seatbelt released and was out the door with a hasty thanks. This was immediately followed by a cry of agony and thump of her hitting the ground. Jane was round the car in a flash and ignoring Lisbon's glare he lifted her into his arms with a grunt.
As he staggered up the driveway he couldn't help noticing Lisbon's mortified expression. Honestly, the woman needed to learn to let someone take care of her for once. The superwoman act was wearing thin at her age. He was about to ask Lisbon about her key when the front door opened and Carol from the gym gave a cry of concern.
Jane barely got a chance to transfer Lisbon to her living room couch before he was hustled out of the way. In the whirlwind of activity that followed he took in the living room; the new framed pictures, pillows, throw rugs and various other un Lisbon-like furnishings. Given the errand of fetching Lisbon some water he drifted past the master bedroom and ensuite, which was more than enough to confirm his suspicions.
After recovering from the shock he rushed to complete his mission. The look Lisbon shot him on his return melted his heart. It took all his mentalist skills to interpret the shades of meaning in Lisbon's expression. There was defiance, embarrassment, apology, affection and underlying it all a plea for acceptance.
For once in his life Jane didn't bother with a mask. His look conveyed regret at a missed opportunity tempered with genuine acceptance of her choice and support of her happiness. He squeezed her knee in understanding, thanked Carol sincerely for taking care of his partner and made his exit.
Jane elected to take a walk from Lisbon's house to his airstream. He needed plenty of thinking time to get his head round this new development; one he hadn't considered even in his wildest conjecture. How could he possibly have misread the situation so badly?
His head was awash with the possible implications of the situation; not unreasonably he started to wonder how he fitted in with Lisbon's new world. There were no recriminations for Lisbon moving on, just profound regret they hadn't been able to forge their own future together. Once again complacency had been his undoing. Determined not to be pushed out again, Jane started to formulate a plan of action.
Back at work Jane made no effort to discuss Lisbon's new life choice. He seemed keen to carry on as before, much to her pleasant surprise. It took a few days for Lisbon to realise he might have some devious plan afoot.
She squinted in annoyance as she took a sip from her luke warm coffee. Goddammit if Jane wasn't talking to Carol again. Lisbon glared belligerently across the foyer; it only just fell short of stalking. Every time she spied Carol he just seemed to pop up out of nowhere.
Lisbon had insisted on keeping everything on the down low; it was well known she and Carol were gym buddies, allowing them to explain away their casual acquaintance. As a precautionary measure Carol had kept on her apartment in the short term, but was sub letting it to a friend to cover the lease. They had everything covered, and then Jane started butting in. Trust him to start sticking his nose in.
Lisbon's annoyance was tempered by some residual guilt where Jane was concerned, though logically she owed him none. Her eyes squinted as she watched his performance, Lisbon could just imagine the charm offensive he was launching. It was the same old routine, all part of the act but people bought it every time. By the looks of Carol's uncharacteristically gauche body language, he'd scored another hit.
The furtive look into Carol's oversized bag, followed by Jane taking her hand and turning it over to inhale her perfume was the oldest trick in the book. Lisbon could read him so well these days, she caught his eye for a nanosecond as he looked up. Although he acted as if he hadn't seen her, the faintest of smirks crossed his face as he continued to woo Carol.
The smug bastard was playing to the gallery. The steam was fairly coming out of Lisbon's ears as she approached them in time to hear Jane's familiar spiel.
"Definitely a vibrant young woman's fragrance. Let me guess. Ah yes a subtle bouquet of tuberose and mimosa, with woody undertones. Graceful, playful but evocative of the first stages of love. Amarige if I'm not mistaken?" Jane paused for affirmation before adding knowingly. "Of course you know that Amarige is just an anagram of the French word mariage, it's an ode to love."
He finished just in time to catch Lisbon mutter under her breath as she walked by. "Yep, just like it says on the box." She knew Carol always carried a small bottle of perfume around in her bag to refresh her fragrance during the day.
Ignoring Lisbon, despite the involuntary twitch of his lips, Jane carried on undaunted. He spoke just loud enough for Lisbon to hear."Just hold on to the magic my dear. Childish naiveté beats defeated cynicism any day." He backed away with a flourish, leaving a slightly flustered Carol behind. Although in no way attracted to Jane, she wasn't immune to his old fashioned gallantry.
Jane finally took his seat behind Lisbon on the sofa. Without even turning to look at him Lisbon growled, "I don't know what your game is, but cut it out Jane."
Glaring at her computer screen she could positively feel his self satisfied smile. "Why Lisbon, who could resist the charms of such a delightful young nymph? So vibrant and full of life."
Only the nearby presence of Wylie stopped her from answering back, she would have no tooth enamel left if he carried on like this. Which of course Jane did, at every opportunity. Even Fischer started to notice what she mistook as Lisbon's jealousy every time Jane stopped to talk to Carol.
The office queen bee saw this as the perfect chance to take Lisbon under her wing, and not coincidentally re-establish herself at the top of the office romance pecking order. She asked Lisbon to lunch, ostensibly to discuss a case and then dropped the act the second they were seated.
She shot Lisbon a faux innocent look. "So Jane's been spending a lot of time around Carol…"
Lisbon adopted an air of indifference. "Oh, has he?"
Fischer leaned in for the kill. "He definitely has and unless you do something about it he could slip right through your fingers."
"I'll take my chances," said Lisbon dryly.
Her colleague raised an eyebrow in surprise. "We both know Jane's a good lookin man and a shameless flirt. A tough dog to keep on the porch, as Hillary Clinton would say."
A wry snort escaped Lisbon. "I doubt the 'old dog' is going to wander too far."
It was time to lay on the sympathy. Fisher placed a gentle hand on Lisbon's arm. "Teresa, you don't want to be complacent. Carol is a lot younger than you are, much as a man might think he's faithful, you place that kind of temptation in his path and he might just 'go with the flow'." She sat back with a knowing look.
Lisbon flushed, Fischer's random shots were landing a little too close for comfort. She crossed her arms defensively. "I know you don't get along with Jane but he's not like that. He would never do that to me." She couldn't help wonder, however, what exactly Jane was up to. She knew he wasn't interested in Carol but that didn't offer much comfort. Jane wasn't one to share his toys.
Kim misread her colleague's sudden look of uncertainty. Fishing through her bag she slipped a dog eared book across the table. Lisbon looked down at the title. Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man (get the man you want and make him your slave!) Oh Dear God.
Fischer misread Lisbon's reaction. "I want you to keep it, please. It's made me the woman I am, maybe it will help you as well."
Lisbon slid it into her handbag like it was a dead rat. Oh well, at least it might make a fun read for her and Carol that night.
Lisbon chewed over Jane's motives for the rest of the day. While she was reasonably certain Jane wouldn't act to cause her outright grief, that still left plenty of leeway for him to cause her mischief. Casting back over their long association, Lisbon was reminded that for all his charm, Jane was a very strange man in some respects.
The distraction interfered with her concentration and Lisbon found herself staying back late to finish a case report. Her phone vibrated to an incoming text causing her to frown in irritation. A quick glance confirmed it was Carol. Having already learnt the cost of not responding to one of her concerned texts, Lisbon rattled off a terse response. Tossing her phone carelessly into her shoulder bag, Lisbon returned to finding the right mix of facts and legalese to put the right level of professional gloss to her work.
As luck would have it, Jane chose that moment to return from one of his mysterious errands that often consumed half the day. Lisbon long suspected there was nothing to them other than Jane finding some pleasant park and falling asleep under a tree. His enthusiasm for crime fighting had never been pronounced and after his return from exile, had deteriorated to downright lackadaisical.
Naturally the blond haired pest decided to perch himself on the corner of her desk, the better to shoot the evening breeze. A fresh cup of tea was raised to his lips when his inquisitive glance took in the spine of Fischer's book. An undignified snort and coughing fit was the result as Jane manfully fought off the reflex that would have showered Lisbon with tea.
Acting from instinct, Lisbon was whacking Jane on the back and handing him a tissue when she remembered she was pissed at him. The whacks subconsciously increased in strength until Jane started crying out in pain.
"OOOW! What was that for?"
Lisbon stopped her motion on the downswing, sparing Jane a particularly punishing blow. "You really have to ask me that?"
Jane took another of Lisbon's tissues to blast the residual tea from his sinuses. "If this is about Carol, I'm only trying to have your back."
Lisbon crossed her arms. "Is that what it's called? I'd have said unhealthy snooping into my private life." Jane had the grace to look uncomfortable, which granted Lisbon the moral impetus to continue.
"You've made it pretty clear you're not interested in giving me what Carol has to offer so why are you getting involved?"
Jane's expression turned from uneasy to alarmed. "It's not like that Lisbon, I swear. I was spending time with Carol to make sure she's worthy of you. I mean, you have terrible taste in men, maybe that translates to women as well."
Lisbon's response died in her mouth. The audacity of the man was breathtaking. She wanted to berate him further but was mastered by her curiosity. "And… ? What's your assessment of Carol?"
Jane's expression softened. "She really is lovely. A little too sheltered, true, but a kinder, more intelligent woman you couldn't have met."
"Gee I'm so relieved you approve, Jane." But Lisbon's sarcasm lacked its usual bite, even to her ears. "What else were you up to with her? You could've learnt all of that from the first meeting."
Jane forced himself to look Lisbon right in the eye. "I found I enjoyed her company. We actually have several interests in common." Lisbon quirked an eyebrow, she clearly wasn't buying it.
Defeated, Jane looked downward. "I don't want to make the same mistake I made with you and Pike," he said in a low voice. "If she's going to be part of your life, I don't want to be caught on the outside. I don't think I could bear to watch our friendship drift apart again."
Caught off guard by his honesty, Lisbon swallowed heavily. "I wouldn't let that happen," she husked. "You weren't the only one to learn a lesson from Pike." They stared at each other for a long moment, regret hung palpably in the air between them. Another text from Carol intruded and Jane took it as a cue to return to his couch. Lisbon looked after him and wondered how her life had become so complicated.
Over the next few days Lisbon was weighed down by trying to decide how she was going to square the equation. On the one hand she had a relationship that addressed most of her emotional and physical needs. Then on the other she had a deep and longstanding friendship with Jane, which in another life would surely have translated into a committed relationship.
Whatever she felt for Carol, even if she didn't know exactly how to label it, was heartfelt and sincere. Carol brought an angst free gaiety to Lisbon's life; she found herself able to wind down, and relax in a way that she hadn't done for years. Her co-workers would have been amazed to see how unfettered she was at home when she finally felt free to throw off the mantle of responsibility and let her hair down.
The whole dynamic of the relationship was completely different from anything Lisbon had known before; it wasn't governed by the rules of sexual politics. There was no need to stand her ground about their respective roles because Carol was on the same side to start with. It was difficult to comprehend, but Lisbon felt relaxed and comfortable with Carol, despite the ambiguity of her feelings.
For all that she couldn't, wouldn't, abandon her friendship with Jane. Their shared history was too significant to erase and for all his various faults, she'd never had such a funny, caring and exciting friend. Life with Jane was an adventure and the thought of living a life without him invariably sent her back to the interminably weary years she'd spent exiled in Canon River.
Little by little Lisbon started to lower her guard, and allow for the possibility of letting Jane into her life with Carol. It was indisputable that the younger woman had fallen for his avuncular charms, and a genuine friendship was burgeoning between them. In the absence of close family, Jane was someone Carol felt comfortable confiding in, and curiously Lisbon found that she didn't feel threatened by that.
When Lisbon reflected on the situation, it was much like one of her favourite Spice Girls songs. "If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends…" While she was still a little conflicted about who should be her lover and who her friend, there was no denying life was much easier when the two worlds were in harmony.
Bringing Jane into the fold proved a boon in a number of ways. Previously reticent to be seen out in public with Carol, Lisbon was much happier when the threesome undertook outings. Having Jane to beard the relationship made her feel much more relaxed about the situation. Though things still felt surreal at times, the threesome found an easy rhythm. Carol's general cheerfulness and enthusiasm served to challenge and inspire Jane and Lisbon, whose natural state tended to be a little more world weary.
Despite the potential awkwardness of the situation, Jane's silky skills ensured Carol never felt excluded when he reminisced over old times with her paramour. Likewise his genuine fondness for Carol soon dissipated any fleeting jealousy he may have felt when he was dropped off at his trailer, despite knowing that Carol and Teresa were off home to their shared bed.
As for Lisbon, she was very much having her cake and eating it too. Things were going so naturally and easily she couldn't help but wonder when it might all go wrong.
Perversely, it was another cat sitting episode that proved the catalyst for changing things up again. When Carol surprised Lisbon with a romantic getaway for two in San Antonio, it was only natural for Jane to be pressed into service as minder for Felix.
Delighted at the prospect of a break from the cramped confines of the Silver Bucket (not that he would ever admit as much), Jane was more than happy to install himself in the spare bedroom of Lisbon's house.
Despite his best intentions, the temptation to have a good snoop round the house finally got the better of Jane. He just couldn't help himself, his natural curiosity had to be satisfied. Starting in the kitchen the cupboard contents were examined to see if they passed muster. The well stocked shelves suggested an attempt at a more balanced diet, although Jane pulled his face at some of the more new age fads that he attributed to Carol.
The books and DVD's definitely reflected Carol's taste more so than Lisbon's; Carol didn't strike him as a Diehard girl, and he wondered where Lisbon had stashed her old favourites. The music system was loaded with an eclectic mix reflecting their differing tastes, but Jane picked up on the more cultural influence of Carol approvingly.
Jane sniffed the various potions in the bathroom, soon recognising which were Lisbon's, and taking a mental note of her favourites in readiness for the festive season.
He paused guiltily outside the master bedroom knowing he really shouldn't pry. Temptation warred with his hunger for knowledge. Oh well, in for a penny, he rationalised as he pushed the door ajar. Felix had been in attendance and gave a cautionary miaow as Jane nosed into the room.
The cat took up his rightful place on the bed from where he could keep a watchful eye on proceedings. Guessing Felix had been relegated from the bedroom with Carol's arrival, Jane cast him a quick look "Well I won't tell if you don't."
Jane attributed the new soft decor to Carol's influence, the shades of champagne and dusky rose were not colours normally associated with Lisbon. The artfully arranged scatter cushions and soft drapes of the now sumptuous boudoir were perfectly suited to a romantic interlude.
With a soupçon of guilt Jane opened the first wardrobe, a preponderance of dresses as opposed to utilitarian pant suits left little doubt that it was Carol's. Quickly moving on, the next wardrobe was full of more practical clothing; the gentle whiff of Lisbon's favourite scent hung in the air. An unexpected flash of colour caught Jane's eye, hello what's this? Jane reached in and pulled out a dusky pink cocktail dress - who would have thought it, Lisbon pretty in pink? The memory of the old tomboy Lisbon posing awkwardly in Van Pelt's bridesmaid outfit, brought a wistful smile to his face. Glancing down his eyes rested on the shoe rack; Lisbon had heels! He lifted up one of the dainty sandals envisaging her in them, with a smile on his face. How times had changed.
Closing the wardrobe door he made his way to the bed. Felix arched his back as Jane neared the bedside table on Lisbon's side. Jane briefly scratched him at the base of his tail before the draw reclaimed his attention. He traced a finger along the top of the drawer, pondering what might be inside. A cranky miaow brought his attention back to Felix, who stared at him in disapproval. Jane's fingers tapped musingly against the wood before reluctantly withdrawing.
Perhaps this was a Pandora's box best left unopened. Temptation overcome, Jane leant over and took hold of Felix with a laugh."It's all right old boy I'm not going to look any further – that would be plain creepy. It's time we made an exit, I don't think either of us should be here any longer."
All of a sudden Jane sneezed, he looked at the cat suspiciously, wondering if he had some kind of allergy. He'd never been confined indoors with a cat before for any length of time, always being more of a dog person.
As Jane snuggled down on the couch, he buried his face in the cushions luxuriating in the comfort of the familiar aroma. This was the life. It had to be said, this was infinitely more appealing than the Airstream. Felix hovered expectantly, hoping to be invited up, but recoiled when Jane was surprised by another sneeze. Jane gave a gentle flick of his foot to move Felix away, but annoyingly the sneezing persisted.
Feeling weary all of a sudden, Jane dragged a soft pink throw over himself and decided to have a little kip. Plenty of time to hide any evidence of his snooping and see to Felix's needs when he woke up…
Jane woke up sweating, shivering and in a state of disorientation. When he finally wrenched his gummed up eyelids apart he recoiled in horror from the strange face leering at him from inches away. The move propelled him out of the couch to crash painfully to the floor. He spent several minutes watching the ceiling revolve before he clawed himself upright.
Now that he was a little more awake he could determine the object of his terror was the Hello Kitty pillow he'd fallen asleep on.
He felt dreadful, far beyond what could be called an allergy. He wondered briefly whether he'd caught a rare human strain of cat flu before dismissing the thought as unfair to Felix. A glance at his watch confirmed the suspicion he'd slept for the better part of 24 hours. It was now Sunday and he needed to pull himself together before the girls arrived home.
Ignoring Felix's strident demands to be fed, he dragged himself into the bathroom and painfully shed his clothes. Marshalling the last of his strength he crawled into the shower and sat back against the cool tiles while the hot water washed his face and chest. Mouth open he gulped down the life giving spray as he tried to use his biofeedback to will himself to health.
Some considerable time later he forced himself to end the shower. He blessed Carol's domesticity with all of his heart when he wrapped himself in one of her extra plush towels. Decency, somewhat precariously secure, he staggered into the kitchen, determined to see to his four legged friend.
Unfortunately while the spirit was willing, the flesh was weak. He was pouring dry food into Felix's bowl when a wave of dizziness overcame him and he collapsed to the floor. When Carol and Lisbon came home some hours later they found Jane passed out with a very full Felix contentedly sleeping on his back.
Carol immediately coo-ed in sympathy and started setting things to right. Lisbon was strangely reticent to touch him, and held back until she was pressed into service, trying hard not to stare openly at Jane's naked flank. It might have explained why Lisbon was unusually receptive to Carol's plea they take in Jane until he was fully recovered.
Jane proved to be suffering from a particularly nasty strain of flu and he soon had Carol catering for his every whim, which further cemented the bond between them. While the cynic in Lisbon was convinced he was milking it for all he was worth, there was no question he'd been genuinely ill. By the time Jane turned the corner their situation had turned so cosily domestic that the subject of him moving out just never seemed to come up.
One night as Lisbon succumbed to Carol's tender ministrations, (mercifully the guest bedroom was at the other end of the house) she couldn't help reflecting how strange her life had become. The lines of love and friendship were becoming more and more blurred and she wondered where it would all end.
A/N Hi Thorntons here
Just a quick note to say thank you to everyone who has stuck with this, and also to thank Fiascoway for completely transforming the original concept with his exciting ideas and his wonderful way with words. I'm not sure who led who astray on the next few chapters but I don't think either of us put up much resistance.