Time frame: Ellis was 19, Keith was 20
POV: Keith
Main event: Raccoon fighting

This chapter is posted for SuperWaspKing.

Did Ellis ever tell you about the time we tried to fight racoons in my back yard? Well, not really "we" being that it was my idea and I was the one that executed the plan. Ellis was just around for the ride to make sure I didn't somehow get killed. By racoons? Right. You might remember this story, am I right? Well, I'm sure that Ellis mentioned that it was all my fault and that the raccoons got fed up real fast and attacked me? Sounds like somethin he would do, always makin me look like the idiot that can't do nothin right no how.

Well, let me tell ya, he was in just as bad shape as I was by the end of the day. See, this fool decided to help me wrangle up the raccoons (there were 3) while smelling terrific. I'm not kiddin, I would have taken a bite outta him myself if I didn't have the human ability to control myself. He smelled like fried chicken and I think that may have set them off, because we were both runnin away from angry raccoons very shortly after testing this idea. I got bit up by 2 of them and the most aggressive one climbed up Ellis' back and bit him square in the eye! Like, in the actual eyeball, not around it.

You'da thought he lost an arm the way he was flippin out about it.

"Keith, I'm gonna go blind" and "Keith, I'ma get the rabies."

Shit, he acted like he already had rabies, all in a panic, breathin heavy and babbling like a drunk old man. His eye was bleedin a bit but I couldn't get a good look at it cause someone said it hurt to open his eyelid. So I got sick of the sudden chaos real quick and I told him,

"Ellis, you see this fist?" And I held up my fist, "Well, I'm about to drive it upside your head and keep punchin until you're unconscious cause you're freakin me out, man. Calm the hell down and we'll get in the truck and go to the doctor and you'll be fine."

He was still gripin at me about my stupid idea...even though I only ever once got mad at him for all the shit he got me into.

Eventually we made it into the hospital room and the doc pried his eye open and I was allowed to look over his shoulder at the damage. When the doc shined the light in his eye, the pupil got smaller, but I could see somethin in it under the magnifying glass. Apparently they were nerves.

I made the mistake of sayin, "Shit, that raccoon bit a hole in his pupil."

This just set Ellis off again and the doc had to shush him and say, "No, the pupil is essentially a hole. It lets light into the eye. It isn't just a black spot."

I didn't know that.

When the doc was writing down his report, I heard him say somethin about "organ damage" and so did Ellis. He was like "WHAT?!" The doc quickly catches himself and mentions that he wasn't meanin internal organs, but external. Of course I was confused again, because I don't got organs on the outside...usually. I always thought that was a bad thing if they were outta you. But he meant skin. The doc insisted that flesh was an organ...a new thing I learned. I also learned that my man bits are an external organ.

Well, anyway, Ellis was fine. His eye was fine. It tore a bit of tissue but it was on the side of the eyeball, not enough to make him lose his sight. The doc just cleaned his eye up and we were on our way, bein that Ellis chose to have the raccoon tested for rabies and it came out negative. What a jerk.