[I'm SO sorry for the delay; bonkers busy at work. I promise to try not to leave it this long again. Thanks for your patience, and for your reviews. For the reviewers wondering why Olivia is trying to get pregnant this time, Alex was hurt in the car crash, and it's unsafe for her to carry a child again.]
Alex eyed Casey as she came into the office. Tension radiated off her, belying her bright smile and friendly greeting. Alex watched her carefully, and spotted the wince Casey tried to hide as she sat down. She looked away, not wanting Casey to realize she was being watched.
Casey smiled as Alex put a coffee on her desk. "Be right back," Alex said, snatching up her purse.
Less than five minutes later, Alex was back, a small paper sack in her hand. "Danish," she smiled shyly, passing it to Casey who adored the rich pastries.
Casey was startled. She had always known that Alex was a good person, and she enjoyed working with her, but the small kindness touched her deep down, and she had to look away to hide the tears that were gathering. She blinked them away. "Thanks," she said, hoping her voice didn't betray her.
Alex returned to her own desk, and bent her head over her paperwork. She looked up again. She didn't want to intrude, but she had to say something. "You look tired," she tried to make her voice as gentle as possible. "We've got an easy day, why don't you go home?" As soon as she spoke, she regretted it, as a look of panic passed fleetingly over Casey's face.
"No, I...," Casey started to speak.
"At least take a nap on the couch," Alex interrupted hurriedly, not wanting to make Casey feel even worse than she clearly already did. She saw Casey hesitate. "Please?" she asked, very softly.
Casey exhaled. She was barely holding it together. She nodded, and got up from her chair. As she turned, she felt a sharp pain in her ribs, and couldn't stop herself from crying out.
Alex looked anguished, but said nothing. She put a gentle arm around her waist, and led her to the couch, helping her to lie down. She took her own, expensive, woolen coat from the coat stand, and draped it over the shaking woman. "Rest," she whispered. "I'll be back in one minute."
Alex stepped out of the office, her nerves shattered. Their assistant, Louanne, looked up, concern etched over her features when she saw Alex's expression. "Is everything okay?" Louanne asked.
Alex shook her head. "Can I use your phone?"
Louanne nodded, pushing it across the desk to her. Alex dialed hurriedly. "Liv? Can you get over here? Something's happened to Casey, I just know it. You can? Great. No, I'm fine. I'll see you soon."
She smiled, shakily at Louanne.
"No visitors or calls," Louanne said, guessing at the situation.
"Except..." Alex started.
"Except Liv," Louanne smiled, and put a soft hand over Alex's. "Let me know if I can do anything. Now or later."
Alex nodded gratefully, and headed back into the office.
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Jay pulled Tomász into her lap, her heart filling with pleasure as he snuggled into her. "It's okay," she whispered. "I'm so sorry you had a bad night. I wish they had called me, I would have come right here. It's awful, being scared at night."
Tomász looked up at her. He couldn't believe his hero was ever scared of anything. "Do you get scared too?" he asked.
"I do, little man. Especially at night. And it's always worse if something bad has happened. But I'm always okay, and you have to remember that. You'll be okay. You've had some terrible things happen to you, but they're over now. You're safe."
"What do you do when you get scared?" he wanted to know.
"Well, Tommy, I'm real lucky. I have Sarah to take care of me, and she holds me if I get scared, or upset about anything. And that makes me feel better. There's nothing quite like a hug, is there?" she rocked him gently.
"Mommy hugs me," Tomász was tearful. "I want my Mommy."
Jay just hugged him closer.
He started to cry. "Mommy's not coming back, is she? Just like Daddy didn't come back?"
"No, Tommy. I'm so sorry. Your Mommy's gone to live with Jesus now."
"Mommy said Daddy was with Jesus," he wept. "I don't want them to be with Jesus. I want them to be with me."
"I know. I know. It's awful. It's very sad."
"Is Mommy with Daddy now?"
"She is. And she'll be real happy with him. But I just know they'll both be sad that they're not still here with you. They still love you, Tommy. Very, very much. And they both want you to be happy," Jay looked up to see the door opening, and saw Sarah come through the door. "And here's someone else that wants you to be happy."
Tommy's weeping slowed as he looked up.
Sarah kissed Jay softly on the lips. She placed one hand on the back of Tommy's head. "Well look here," she spoke quietly. "It's my favorite boy."
Tommy looked over at her.
"I've got somebody in my bag who wants to meet you," Sarah continued. "Shall I get him out?"
Tommy sniffed, as his crying stopped. He nodded.
Sarah reached into her large bag and pulled out a huge, soft, teddy bear. She held him out to Tommy. "He told me he gets sad on his own, and he wants a nice little boy to take care of him. Do you think you could do that?"
Tommy nodded again, a small smile on his face.
Sarah pushed the bear into his arms, and he hugged him to himself tight. "What's his name?" he asked.
"He doesn't even have a name," Sarah said. "And that makes him real sad. Maybe you can think of a name for him?"
"My Daddy gave me a bear called Igor, but I don't know where he is. Do you know where Igor is?" he looked at Jay who, as far as he was concerned, knew the answer to absolutely everything.
Jay shook her head. "I think maybe Igor is with Mommy and Daddy," she said gently. "How about we call this fella Igor? What do you think?"
Tommy nodded. He hugged the bear again. "Jay says you take care of her when she gets sad," he said to Sarah.
"She takes care of me too," Sarah said.
"Because you love her," Tommy said.
"That's right. We love you too, Tommy. Very much. We want to help you when you get sad."
"Jay says she's gonna go home," his bottom lip trembled. He turned away, and buried his face back in Jay's front.
"Not until Sunday. That's nearly six days away," Jay said. "But I'm gonna come back and visit you. Every day," she promised. "Sarah's going to drive me here every day after lunch, and we'll spend the afternoons together, if that's okay with you." She could feel Tommy nodding into her chest.
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Olivia tapped very gently on the door, and Alex came out almost immediately. Olivia saw her pale expression, and her worry increased further.
"He must be back," Alex spoke quietly. "She's hurt. She's been trying to hide it, but I can tell. She's asleep right now."
"Does she need to go to the hospital?" Olivia wanted to know.
"I don't know. A doctor, at least. She's very fragile emotionally."
Olivia nodded. She had done this more times than she could remember, but this time it was a friend, which made it so much harder. She went into the office, and saw Casey curled up on the couch, her face as white as milk. Even in her sleep, she looked tense. Olivia drew up a chair and sat near Casey's head. She took her hand between her own. "Case?" she spoke softly.
Casey blinked, a look of terror briefly flitting across her face; when she realized it was Olivia, she relaxed visibly. "Sorry," she said, thickly. "Fell asleep."
"I know," Olivia kept her tone gentle and unthreatening. "You're okay," she squeezed her fingers. "It's all going to be okay, now. We're gonna help you. This can't go on, can it? You know that."
Casey nodded miserably, as she struggled to sit up. Alex helped her into an upright position, readjusting the warm coat as Casey started to shiver.
"You're hurt, Casey," Olivia said.
Casey nodded.
"We should get you checked out."
Casey nodded again. She blinked. She could feel herself start to panic. She tried to think calming thoughts, and to concentrate on Olivia's warm fingers and gentle voice. What was she saying? And why was it getting so hard to breathe?
Alex could see Casey crumbling, and sat down next to her. She put a comforting hand on her back. "Try to relax," she said softly. "Bus?" she mouthed at Olivia.
Olivia shook her head. She moved to sit the other side of Casey on the couch, so that the stricken woman was cocooned between her friends. "I'd like to take you to the hospital. Can I do that? I'll be with you the whole time."
Casey nodded; she didn't trust herself to speak. Her breathing quickened, and she was finding it hard to drag air into her lungs. And her side hurt so bad. It should be feeling better by now.
"Relax," she heard a voice. She felt a paper sack being held over her nose. "It's going to be okay," she thought she recognized Olivia's voice. "We're going to take care of you now. It's over."
Slowly, the panic started to recede, and Casey's breathing improved.
"There you go," Alex said softly. "See? We knew you could do it. That's it, Casey. You're okay," she pulled Casey gently to her, so that she was held in her warm arms. "We're gonna get you fixed up, and we're going to take care of you. There, good girl."
"When you're ready, we'll head to the parking lot," Olivia said quietly, nodding approvingly as Louanne entered unobtrusively with warm blankets that she had evidently snagged from the nurse's office.
Alex helped Louanne drape the blankets around Casey's shoulders, smiling at her as she left the office.
Casey had never known such misery. She had tried. She really had. She knew Charlie was sick. When they had first gotten together, he had been so sweet, so loving. And it wasn't his fault he had got sick. But she couldn't take any more of it. And he had crossed a line; there was no coming back from that.
"He raped me," she whispered, so quietly that Olivia wasn't sure she had heard right; she could see from Alex's look of horror that she had. "Twice. He raped me, then he beat me. And then he raped me again."
Alex tightened her grip on her. She kissed her softly on the forehead. "It's over, Cassandra. It's over."
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"I wish we could tell him," Sarah said quietly to Jay once they were both sure Tomász was asleep in her arms.
"We can't get his hopes up," Jay said. "When are they visiting us?"
"Next Tuesday morning," Sarah said. "Olivia called one of her contacts at Children's Services, and told her all about us. That's gotta help, right? Olivia deals with them all the time."
"He's not even four," Jay's voice cracked. "All he's been through, and he's barely more than a baby."
"We'll make it good for him. We'll do everything we can."
"We'll have to move," Jay said. "We've only got one bedroom."
"I know. And that two bedroom apartment next to us has just been sold, so we can't move into that. But we'll find somewhere, and we'll try to make sure we stay as close to the family as we can. He'll need others around him. Lily's so sweet with him, isn't she? He needs other kids in his life."
"I just hate that he's suffered so much," Jay blinked away her tears.
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"I will," Abbie tried not to laugh. "I swear. Peanut butter ice cream, I got it. Anything else?"
"Just you," Caryn growled. "Please tell me you can get back here at lunch? We're all missing you."
"You mean you're horny, and our battery-operated friend isn't hitting the spot?" Abbie teased, knowing how keyed up Caryn was at this mid-point of her pregnancy. She had been the same, and she knew it was mean to tease her, but she just couldn't resist.
"Are you coming over, or not?" Caryn snapped.
"I wish," Abbie sighed. "Truly, I do. But I've got court at 2pm, and a meeting at 12.30pm. I just can't, CW. I'm sorry. I'm real sorry."
Caryn wanted to throw the phone against the wall, but she knew it wasn't Abbie's fault. "S'okay," she said, miserably.
"I know how you're feeling," Abbie said. "And I know everything seems so much worse right now. I'll be back tonight. I can't wait to be with you. And your magnificent boobs," she smiled as she heard Caryn chortle. "Until then, baby, I'm afraid you're gonna have to … take things into your own hands."
"It's not the same," Caryn wanted to cry. She hated herself for being so emotional. Damned hormones.
"I know. I'll make it worth the wait, I swear."
"You always do," Caryn said. "You always do."
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"How do you want to do this?" Olivia asked Casey, as she helped her lie down on the gurney. "Both of us?"
"Just you," Casey whispered. "Don't leave me?" she begged.
"Not for one minute. Not until you say so," Olivia promised, taking her hand and holding it tight. "I'm with you every step of the way."
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Wheels burst into the hospital waiting room, seeing its only occupant sitting unhappily in the corner.
"Alex?" Wheels spoke quietly.
Alex looked up.
"We should have stepped in," Wheels said.
"She wouldn't listen," Alex's voice shook.
"I know. She still loves him," Wheels sank into a chair. "God, it's not as if she didn't know where to go."
Alex nodded.
"Liv with her?"
"Yeah. She's amazing. She always knows the best thing to say. Oh my God," Alex started to cry. "I mean, we all knew. We thought … you know, he was a bit rough with her. But I didn't think he was capable … Christ, I should know. In my job."
Wheels took her hand. "We'll take care of her. We'll make this right. Or as right as we can."