AN: Ugh, I'm so unsure about this chapter, I actually had a hard time writing this chapter. I hope you guys enjoy this and don't hate me. Also, this may not affect this story at all, but I have two things to say. One, I'm currently having writer's block and having trouble more chapters. Two next is my school vacation and I'll be doing things with my family so I don't know if I will post next week's chapter. I will do my best to try and post, but please don't hate me if I don't. -JuJuB7

Part One:

Chapter Six

Already in love. Those were the first words that ran through eighteen year old Peyton Sawyer's head. She was already in love. She couldn't describe this feeling. It was just a feeling she felt. The tears leaked from her eyes, this feeling was overwhelming, but she loved the feeling. She didn't want it to go away. She wanted the feeling to last forever. She knew this feeling was going to last forever. As long as she was in love, this feeling would be in her heart. She smiled. She smiled. She couldn't help but be happy. No one could destroy her happiness. Why wouldn't she be happy? Peyton holds her baby, her daughter, in her arms for the very first time. She smiles as Sawyer opens her eyes and looks up at her mother. Tears came to Peyton's eyes, her baby has Lucas' eyes. Sawyer looks like her except for the eyes, her beautiful eyes, her daughter's eyes will always remind of Lucas. The guilt had already set in… Her baby had HCM, just like Lucas. They already told her when she woke up, her baby was gonna need surgery. She wasn't even a month old and she's gonna need surgery. She wants Lucas to know, but she knows that he'll be mad at her. Peyton thinks about the letter she wrote months ago, the one she never mailed because she was too afraid.

…

Dear Lucas,

Hi, it's Peyton. Peyton Sawyer. I know you're probably mad at me. I don't blame you. I would be mad at me too if I went through what you were going through. I just want to say I'm so sorry for leaving. I, honestly, I don't know what I was thinking, but I couldn't bring myself to come back after I left. I feel so ashamed, not because I'm pregnant. I'm glad I'm pregnant. I know that's something an eighteen year old shouldn't be happy about being pregnant, but this baby has changed my life. I'm going to have a baby, someone's not going to leave me and I'm not going to leave our baby girl. Yeah, we're having a baby girl. I already have a name picked out, Sawyer Brooke Scott, our baby girl…. Sorry, I'm talking about this. I'm not sure you want to hear this, maybe you do, but you're probably still really mad at me. I hope you don't stay mad at me forever, I hope someday you might forgive me. You don't know how many times I've thought about coming back, back to everyone, back to you. For some reason, I can't. Like I said I feel ashamed. I don't know why, I just do. I know I shouldn't feel ashamed. We created a new life. I've talked to Brooke, she wants me to come back, of course she does, I'm her best friend. Best friend are suppose to be near each other, not states away. I've also talked to my Dad, I even saw him. He told me about putting the house up for sale, I'm sad that I'm never going to get to see that house again, but I know a good family will buy that house. I just want to tell you one thing if I never see or hear you again… I love you, I've always loved and I will always continue to love you. I'm sorry for everything I've done, everything I've done to you. You've been the one person I've been able to count on and then I left, carrying your baby. I'm sorry. I love you, Lucas Scott.

Sorry & Love you,

Peyton

P.S. I still have the ring you gave me on my eighteenth birthday, I'll always cherish our time. I love you.

…

Peyton has tears in her eyes and tears running down her cheeks. She's been contemplating sending this letter for months. She's not sure if she should, she should have sent this letter months ago, but she didn't because she was too afraid of what he would say. Peyton looks down at her sleeping daughter, maybe she should write another letter. Let Lucas come see their daughter after she is at Tree Hill Hospital and Lucas was still in tree hill. She remembers the day showed up at Tree Hill, originally going to see Lucas. That day was so crazy, she remembers every single thing about that day. She kind of wishes she didn't.

…

May 20, 2005

Peyton looks as she passes the 'Welcome to Tree Hill' sign. She couldn't believe she was back after months of being away. She was finally going to see Lucas, after nine months of not seeing each other. She couldn't believe she was actually doing this. Peyton's thoughts stop when she pulls up to her old house, police cars and an ambulance are sitting outside of the house. Peyton can see Nathan and Haley and wonders what they were doing there. She can see Haley's stomach, Haley's pregnant just like her. That makes Peyton smile, but the next thing Peyton sees makes her smile drop, automatically the tears well in her eyes. She sees Lucas being wheeled out of a stretch, a mask covering his face and bandages tightly covering his wrists, both of them. It's only then Peyton sees the blood covering Nathan's shirt. She didn't know what was happening, she just knows that Lucas is injured. 'How could Lucas' wrist start bleeding?' Peyton thinks to herself. Peyton's eyes widen and she gasps as she realizes what happened. It didn't take a genius to figure out what Lucas tried to do. She couldn't believe it, but she knew… Peyton knew it was her fault… It was her fault that Lucas tried to kill himself. She let the tears fall, she couldn't believe Lucas tried to kill himself. Maybe is she hadn't left, he wouldn't have tried to kill himself. This wouldn't have happened. None of it.

Peyton felt it. She felt something trickle down her leg. She reached down to feel what is was. When she pulled her hand out, she saw red. Deep, dark red. Blood! Peyton was bleeding. The doctor warned her about being careful, both her and her baby was at risk and Peyton just had to come back, a road trip. She should have stayed home, where she had her doctor near her, but no, she had to drive all the way back to tree hill to see the father of her baby.

The only thing Peyton has to worry about as she's driving by the chaos is making it to the hospital before something really bad happens.

…

Peyton looks towards the door as it opens, Brooke walks in. Brooke's been here ever since she Peyton made it to the hospital.

"Hey, B. Davis," Peyton says.

"Peyton," Brooke says.

"What's wrong?" Peyton asks.

"There's something I need to tell you, it's about your pregnancy and the babies," Brooke says.

"You mean baby, I only had one baby," Peyton says.

"No, sweetheart," Brooke pauses. "You had two. A girl and a boy."

AN: Well, thank you for reading this chapter. I hope everyone reading it. I really wanted to show that Peyton is still deeply in love with Lucas, but feels ashamed for leaving and doesn't want to return. Yes, she did have twins, it was somewhat explained in the next chapter, but I wanted to explain it more because I know I will be receiving questions. So she was pregnant with twins, her doctor didn't see the other twin because he was hiding behind his sister. Thanks for reading, JuJuB7.

P.S. Like I said before I will be on vacation next week with my family, I will try and get the next chapter up. It will either be up early in the day or up super late in the day. Thanks again, JuJuB7.