Christians POV

God, ever since I opened the hotel room door and saw her standing there in just a robe I have wanted to lose myself in her. We agreed to be honest with each other and when she told me that she couldn't forget me, my heart leaped out of my chest and I couldn't control myself any longer. Kissing her after all this time still made me weak in the knees and I need to satisfy this built up passion inside of me. It's been way to long since I have had any sort of release from anything other than my left hand.

I toss her on the bed and remove my clothes – except my t-shirt, I don't know what her touch to my chest is going to do to me. When she left me, I wouldn't let anyone get near me, I went straight back to the old Christian.

I climb on top of her and slowly work my way up her body before capturing her mouth with mine. When we finally break apart, we are both gasping fair, as I look down into those blue eyes - I start to remember how we got to this point. Which causes me to sit back up on my knees and fight to stay there; the look on her face is twisted into pain and confusion. I feel like I already know she is going to think, that I don't want her anymore.

"Christian, what's wrong?" She says, she's leaning back on her elbows and looking up at me waiting for an answer and I feel her legs tightening around my hips.

"I… I don't have any condoms," I say. Running my hands through my hair, I need to control myself – she still has such a powerful hold on my body when I am with her, even after all this time. "Ana, I don't think this is such a good idea."

Her face falls and I can already see the tears forming in her eyes, even when she isn't even looking at me, I know that she is devastated. "We need to talk about something's before we can be together like this again… I know I told you that I wanted to show you how much I've missed you and God, do I want too. I want nothing else but to bury myself in you right now, but we need to be smart about this. I don't want us to rush into something without straightening out a few things first."

She goes to say something but we are both interrupted by my Blackberry ringing, I let out a breath and get off the bed to pick up my phone.

"Grey."

Ana's POV

He moves to pick up his phone and I can't help but to lie back down and cover my face with my hands. What the hell just happened? As he talks to who I can only assume is Taylor, I think about what he said about waiting until we were in the right mind set to do anything sexual. He is probably right; I have to go back to New York tomorrow night. If we did end up having sex, leaving again after that would have been heartbreaking.

"Ana, are you listening to me? I have to go." Christian's words pull me out of my thoughts and I sit up slowly to look at him. "I'm sorry; I really have to go take care of something at Escala."

Oh.

"O...Okay," I say and wipe the tears from my face with the sleeve of the robe, "you're right, this was probably a bad idea." I make a move to get up by sliding towards the edge of the bed and he steps in between my legs to stop me.

"Hey, I was serious when I said that I wanted you more than anything. But, if we're going to start over we need to get some things straight before moving forward. Giving in to our desires would only make matters worse," he looks just as devastated as I probably do.

"Christian, it's fine, I need to get some rest anyways so I can see Ray and say goodbye to everyone tomorrow." When I finally look up at him he looks angry, "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"You're leaving tomorrow?" He says with aggression, "Your flight plan says that you're not leaving until Tuesday."

My flight plan?" I don't get it, "How did you…-"

"Ana, I am still the same controlling man you knew all those years ago. I was told you might be visiting this weekend and I needed to know," he says.

"You can't just spy on me whenever you think I am going to be in town, Christian. Do you know anything else about my life in New York?" He doesn't even need to say anything; all he does is smile and lean down to kiss my forehead.

When he stands and makes his way to the door I stop him, "Christian, can I please ask you just one thing and I beg you to be honest with me…" He stops and turns towards me, waiting, "I know it's the weekend and all…" I drop my head, "that thing you need to take care of at Escala wouldn't be a sub would it?" I don't even want to look up because if he says yes, I don't want him to see how hurt I'd be.

"Ana, have you not listened to a word I have said to you?" What does that mean?

"It's alright, you don't have to tell me, I mean I completely understand if you do because we aren't together any-" he cuts me off by walking right up to me and pulling me to his body.

"I told you that our love is unforgettable and I meant it," and with that he was gone.

"Ana, just tell me! I already know that you two have talked, just tell me!" Kate had been pressuring my nonstop since I came back to their house this morning for breakfast.

"Fine, but you cannot say anything to anyone!" I take a deep breath, "Kate, we talked but didn't get down to what we needed too. I wish we didn't get so distracted actually."

"I knew it, you guys totally had sex! When you're back I get to hear all the juicy details!"

"Kate, we didn't have sex. We almost did, but we didn't," I say and now that I think about it I should have said it with more confidence instead of sounding so sad.

"But, you almost did? That's still something. Maybe you guys should just save the talking for later and just have it out…"

"…and on that note, I need to get going. I want to get to the airport early." I stood up and turned towards Kate – giving her one last hug before leaving. "I'm going to miss you Kate, I need to start coming back out here more."

"Yeah, me too Steele and I know you'll be back out here to see Christian." She says that with a wink and her signature smile.

"Right, you keep saying that," I grabbed my bags and made sure I had everything before getting back on the road towards SeaTac. On my way, I think about Christian and what he said about starting over and how our love is unforgettable. Maybe I should call him when I get to the airport to say goodbye one last time; I sound like a teenage girl head of heels in love with the star jock of high school. Well, at least one of those is true.

When I arrive at the airport I am still deciding on whether I should call Christian or not, why am I even debating? I sit there and people watch, because that is the best thing to do while in an airport, and I see how everyone else is interacting with each other. All the couples who are jetting off to somewhere to spend time with each other; and all the families who are on vacation with their loved ones makes me feel like coming back here was the right choice. I am so happy that I got to see Christian but I just wish we could say goodbye to each other one last time.

I look at my phone and go to his contact, as soon as I press the button to dial his number I get butterflies in my stomach. I take a deep breath and listen to the ringing and then get disappointed when it goes to voicemail. "Hey, it's me. I…I just wanted to tell you I was leaving and…" I take another breath and wait to get my words together. "I don't know what I'm doing, I just wanted to say goodbye to you. I'll see you around, Christian."

I hang up and curse myself for sounding so dumb, I shouldn't even have called him. As soon as my flight gets called I jump up, ready to get on the plane back home, eager to be in my own space and get back to work.

The flight was long and bearable, I was so happy when I stepped off the plane; I immediately turned my phone on to see if Christian had called me back. I was even more disappointed when I saw that there weren't any missed messages, so I throw my phone back in my bag. When I get down to baggage claim I see some one that is holding a sign with my name on it. I don't think anything of it, it just has my last name on it – there isn't any way that he's standing there for me.

I walk right past him to pick out my luggage and I glance over my shoulder to see that he is actually following me. When I stand to wait, he stands right next to me and dials his phone, "She has arrived, sir." He says to whoever, "Yes, sir. Right away." When he turns to me I am already in the process of picking up my bag but he grabs it out of my grip like it weighs nothing. "Ma'am, I would like you to come with me. I will be bringing you back to your apartment per Mr. Grey's orders."

I roll my eyes, and gesture for him to lead the way. Once we are in the car, he calls whoever to let them know that we are on our way back to my apartment. I stare out the window and figure that this is just personal security that Christian has hired since we are talking again or probably has something to do with that situation he had to get back to Escala for. When we arrive back to my apartment, the driver jumps out to open my door, "Ms. Steele, please head up stairs and I will follow with you bags shortly." I look at him with confusion and mumble an okay, all I want to do is eat and fall into bed.

When I get upstairs and unlock my door, I walk into an amazing scene…

There are candles lit everywhere and flowers upon flowers everywhere, I drop my purse on the floor to kneel and scrounge out my phone from somewhere. I walk more and more into my apartment and see more and more flowers and candles and then when I look closely at what's on the floor - I am in total shock, tears are pooling in my eyes. There are pictures scattered everywhere of Christian and I from the time we spent together five years ago. There is only one person who would do this for me, I dial Christian's number and then spin around when I hear someone's phone ringing right behind me.

What I see is the most gorgeous man ever…just standing in my kitchen.