"The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them."

Ernest Hemingway

Red fidgeted her way through breakfast, picking at her bacon and shoving her pancakes right onto my plate. She was in my lap, partially due to limited seating space and mostly because I put her there. I took pity ten minutes into her silent torture. "You want to go take a shower, don't you?"

She flushed, fork scraping loudly across the plate perched in her lap. "Yes, badly."

Snorting, my breath ruffling her hair, I grinned. "Even if it's futile." I bounced her a little on my knee, making the recliner-style chair rock ominously beneath us. It certainly wasn't meant to rock, at any rate.

"Even so," she replied, not looking at me as she mutilated her bacon.

"Let's get this show on the road then. Princess needs her bubble-bath." Red elbowed me in the stomach, but laughed too. "Quil and Embry, you all head up to the Westfield Property, and if you could check out the Hallow, that would be great. Let me know if we need to pump the basements, and get a head count on who can help out and who needs help."

"Want me to call the guys in Hoquiam?" Embry asked, already pushing up out of his chair. "Storm barely hit them, from what I've heard. They can probably lend a hand."

"Good idea," I agreed easily, leaning back in the recliner. "Call Billy too, see if we need to bull-doze any of the roads. No Quil, just no," I added, at his hopeful look. Our company bulldozer was an old and wheezing thing, bought for nothing and carefully maintained at the hands of Jacob. There was no shot in hell I'd let Quil get behind the wheel. "Jared and Paul, you two can hit the coast-side houses; make a priority list for repairs. You and Embry can work out where we need the most help."

"My dad will probably come by after work," Red added, taking my empty plate and stacking it on hers. "Someone should tell him the news. And not me. He's still...kind of pissed about the whole vampire thing."

We all raised our eyes at the whole vampire thing, but let it go. "What about me?" Leah asked, draining the last of her orange juice.

"Yeah, about you." I winced as her eyes narrowed. "Look, Leah. You know I'd love to have your help on the hard stuff, the heavy lifting, but I can't. I'm not trying to be sexist, but you're a girl. I can't exactly have you hauling trees out of the road and shit. Take Seth," I raised my hand at Seth's burgeoning protests. "And go visit your dad. I know your mom drove him to Forks early this morning, and I know he's fine, but right now your family needs you more than the Rez."

Though her face was pinched, Leah was grateful. I'd known her long enough to tell. "Alright," Leah grumbled, pushing up from her place on the floor. "Come on dipshit," she said, smacking Seth on the back of the head.

"Hey!" Seth grunted, swatting at her. "Sam!"

"Just for that Leah," I laughed, fishing my truck keys from my pocket, "Seth gets to drive. Nothing over 30 mph, and Leah don't nag him too bad."

Though Leah groaned, Seth caught the keys, eyes lighting up. "Dude, seriously? Thank you." It was hard being fifteen.

The Pack made themselves scarce, politely rinsing their dishes in the sink before slipping on their shoes. Red was already in the bathroom, pipes groaning as the shower sputtered to life. "Want me to head into town, meet up with the council?" Jacob asked, already jamming his feet into his own shoes. "I told Dad about the vamp, but I doubt he's had time to spread the word yet."

"I'll talk to the council," I replied, leaning against the counter. "Listen, I don't want Red to hear, but I want you to run a patrol."

Jacob perked up in an instant. "Did you smell something? No one else did."

"No," I sighed, swiping a hand down my face. "I don't know, I just don't want to let our guard down because we caught the bitch. There could be more. There's always more So, nose to the ground, do a perimeter check, maybe? What. Fifty miles?" I needed the assurance that Red was safe, as was my Rez, and if I couldn't do it myself, who better than my second-in-command?

"Sure thing," Jacob replied easily. "Let my dad know I'm out?"

Watching Jacob slip out the door, my eyes landed on Red's bag. With guilty hands, I slipped the red book from the bag, hiding it in the cupboard over the fridge where Red could never reach.

It came back to bite me in the ass of course, as I knew it would.

I came back from work one evening, sweaty and tired, to find Red tearing up my house. "What are you doing?" I asked, biting back a laugh as I watched her flip the couch cushions.

Any amusement faded away when I caught sight of her face. Red was near to tears and frantic. "I lost it," she cried, lip trembling. "One of the journals Billy lent me, I lost it! He'll never forgive me! I promised him I would take care of them, and now I can't find it anywhere! I thought...I was sure it was in my bag, but it's not and-"

"Red," I said in a rush, catching her hands in mine. "Red, calm down, okay? I have the journal, I have it. I took it out of your bag. I didn't think you'd flip out, I just-"

She frowned, hands going limp in mine. "You took it? Why? I mean, why didn't you tell me? I was freaking out! I had no idea what I was going to tell Billy! God, Sam! Didn't you already read them?" She looked at me, impatiently expectant.

"Yes," I admitted. "I've read them all, and I...I don't want you to read that one. Not yet. There are things in that one that I'm not ready for you to read, things that should come from me."

Her mouth pulled tight as she gritted her teeth, eyes narrowing at me like they had all those months ago when there was a not-so-thin veneer of hate between us, and I hated it. "Secrets," she said tightly. "More secrets. Secrets you keep for my own good."

She wasn't wrong, but she wasn't wholly right. And in this instant, I felt that a modicum of honesty might do me more good than harm. "Not entirely," I admitted. "I mean, yes, somewhat. But at this point, I think these secrets are mostly for my own good. I'm not ready for you to know. I might never be."

And that was the truth, though I didn't feel any better for saying it. I hadn't realized that my withholding of information had somehow become less about protecting her, and more about protecting me. It made me feel selfish, and ashamed. How had that happened?

When I looked back at her, her face shone with nothing but enormously misplaced concern. "Sam," she said softly. "Whatever it is, it can't be that bad."

"Oh it can," I admitted. "I'm afraid you'll be mad at me. I know you will, actually, you'd be insane not to be mad at me. But...but I just...it's big. It's big and it's scary and it could change things." I paused, swallowing hard around the lump in my throat. "It could change us."

Red worried her lip between her teeth, thoughtful and quiet. "I don't want us to change," she decided. "If it's this big...and if it's not hurting us..." Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath and looked up at me. "I won't pretend to love the idea of secrets, but I trust you Sam. I trust you to tell me when you're ready. And if you're never ready, that's okay, because I know you'd never do anything to hurt me."

I don't know what compelled me to say it, to admit it as I did. "It's in the cupboard above the fridge. If you trust me, you won't look at it. But if...if it ever becomes too much, not knowing, it's there. It's all there."

Her eyes flickered to the kitchen archway, to the cupboard in question, but she shook her head. "I trust you."

Summer withdrew, the wind growing chiller with every passing day. With community effort, it didn't take long for the Rez to repair itself. Red moved back into her father's house, but still worked with my mother, and spent half her nights in my bed. Charlie didn't seem all too comfortable with the fact, but his girl was a woman, and her boyfriend was a wolf, so he seemed to hold his tongue. Charlie had always liked me, but maybe a little less since I'd started sticking it to his daughter. It was understandable, I suppose.

My very own father had surprised the tribe by sticking around, much to my personal annoyance. My mother seemed to accept what little wishes I had of her, and didn't let the bastard move in. He rented a studio apartment over the convenience store, near Old Quil's place, far enough to keep me happy. If he was around, it wasn't around me. He'd helped out happily in the repairs, but when I found him on my worksite, the careful calm we'd built had nearly burst. I'd worked damn hard to build my business, happily hiring hard-working men and women, but not him. I had limits, and some things were just mine. There had been one other awkward instance where I'd swung by to pick the girls up from dance, and found him there, just watching.

Whatever bridges he was building, I wasn't ready to cross.

"This is nice," Red said, her back to my chest, as we sat before the bonfire, legs outstretched in the sand. "Why haven't we done this before?"

"We use to," I replied, watching my pack, and many of the other Rez kids around the fire. "We use to get together all the time on the beach, just a bunch of dumb kids with nothing to do, all the free time in the world. Before everything."

Everything. Before phasing, and wolves, and vampires, and imprinting and Red.

Everything.

She looked up at me, smile flickering. "Understandable. But you can't put your life on hold, Sam. Sometimes it's things like this, little shit, that keeps you going. You have to remember why you do everything in the first place."

"Very true," I murmured, propping my chin on her head. "Speaking of putting your life on hold, what are your plans, Red? Nothing holding you back anymore." A lie; that was a lie.

Red snorted, leaning back against me, leeching onto my warmth. "I don't know. School, maybe. Charlie thinks I should go to college. Maybe go into education like my mom, or something. I could teach." And she could; she'd gotten the boys through their tests single-handedly, and was currently working with Seth to get him ahead of the game.

School. College. It was hard to say, but I said it. "I agree with Charlie." I wanted what was best for her, even if sometimes I believed best-for-her was simply at my side. But more importantly, I wanted her to have whatever she wanted.

She frowned, nose scrunching up. "I don't know," she sighed. "I mean, I want to go back to school. I've always wanted college. But I feel like I can't leave, or something. Stupid, huh?"

Something in me clenched, tight and painful. It wasn't stupid. For all that she could have changed the imprint, could have forced our bond to grow different (brother, friend, protector, something), she hadn't. Even when she'd fought me, she hadn't fought the imprint. She let us grow closer, baby-step by baby-step. She'd done it on her own time; sure, never moving 'til she was ready, but she'd done it. Red had let the imprint grow exactly as it should, and with everything she gave into it, it grew stronger. Every time she trusted me, every time she cared for me; I could feel it, how tightly woven we'd become. I could see it when she hesitated at my door, keys in hand but wavering, unwilling to go home for the night. The bond grew stronger because she wanted it to. But it hadn't done her any favors. "No. Not stupid."

"I feel at home here," she said with a sigh. "I thought I'd look into some online classes, and what I couldn't do online, maybe go up to Port Angeles a few days a week?"

That she phrased it like a question bothered me to no end. "If that's what you want, Red. I mean, is that all you want? Charlie said you'd applied to a bunch of colleges before..." There was a pause, awkward and heavy. Red tensed, shoulders pulling tight against my chest. "Before everything."

Relaxing again, Red looked up at me with an easy, honest smile. "I don't know that I ever wanted to go to Alaska, or Dartmouth, or wherever. I think I was just...following a dream that wasn't mine. I can't imagine leaving Charlie when I really just got him back and...and I don't want to move somewhere and be the new girl again."

"And if you hadn't met me?" I asked, looking down at her. "If you hadn't met me, or came to stay at the Rez, with the guys and my Mom and everything, would you still want to stay?"

Red made a face, like she didn't understand what I was asking. "Of course not. I wouldn't have a reason to stay," she told me, blithely. "I would have run head-first into everything with a bad attitude and a grudge against the world. I wouldn't have had a reason to stop fighting everyone around me. To stop letting myself be so fucking mad all the time. I wouldn't have gotten Jacob back in my life, or met all these amazing people I can't even imagine not knowing. I would have ruined myself, if I hadn't met you Sam."

And maybe it was true, but it didn't make me feel like I was holding her back any less. "I know, I just-"

"I know what you just," Red cut me off, firmly. "You just think you're holding me back. You're not the first to say it," she explained, sharply. "But in the end, you just have to believe I know what I want. And even if I don't, you have trust that I can figure it out on my own. I don't want to leave Forks, or the Rez. And I don't want to leave you. College is important," she added, sensing my following argument. "And I plan on taking classes, and doing something with myself, but not at the expense of...of being happy." Blushing, she looked away, smiling. "Because I am happy."

"That's all I want," I said, sighing. The only comfort I had was knowing that the imprint couldn't make her do or want anything; it could only encourage her to follow what she did want. But at what expense? Was I holding her back from something bigger?

Would I be enough.

God, but self-doubt was a bitch.

"I'm glad we were never sickly-cute like that," she said, eyeing Jared and Kim across the fire. "God, I didn't even know he was dating anyone. I don't know about you, but I'm embarrassed just watching them."

The Jared-Kim revelation had been a worrying one for me. I was happy for my pack-brother of course; Jared had imprinted on Kim just after finishing his testing. Her mother was a teacher, and she'd been waiting in the parking lot. All it took was one look, and bam. Just like that. I had worried that Red would see the similarities, but as of yet, there were none.

Kim and Jared had fallen in love the second they'd laid eyes on each other. There was no fighting, from neither side, like there had been with Red and I. It was strange, watching an imprint unfold so seamlessly. They were affectionate, and loving, and horrifying to watch. He'd told Kim everything within six hours of imprinting, and by that evening, they were fucking like bunnies. It had made for an uncomfortable conversation between Jared and I the following morning, in which we discussed safe sex with red faces and stinted words.

Still, it was weird to see to people give in to each other so easily. I wondered if Jared would ever appreciate Kim the way I appreciated Red, and her fight. I felt guilty for wondering at all. But Jared understood it, understood me, better for it. As the only imprinted pack members, we shared something the rest of our wolves had only witnessed second-hand.

It was nice to be understood, if nothing else.

It was discussed, however, the mentioning of imprinting to Red. I wasn't happy, of course, but it wasn't fair to Jared or Kim to force them to keep something so special to themselves. While I didn't see it as any reason to brag, I could understand why one might. To be so cosmically chosen, seemingly by our Gods themselves, to carry on our Tribal Gift, it was big. So, Red would be told, eventually, and in the most clinical and off-handed way possible. And by no means would I be the one telling her because I knew without a doubt it would be written on my pathetic face.

I'd probably make Quil do it. No one paid attention to anything Quil said.

tbc