Chapter LXXIX: The Good and the Bad

December 9, 2542 (UNSC Calendar)/three months later

New Alexandria, Viery Territory, Reach, Epsilon Eridani System

"Fondo, fondo, fondo, fondo, fondo!" everyone in the pub yelled loudly as I tilted the large tankard upwards so that the rest of the alcohol in it could reach my mouth with no problem.

I finished what was left of the soft liquor and glanced in front of me at Grass. Camilla was just half a mug behind me by the looks of it, and the marines and soldiers crowding our small table were drunkenly chanting the words that I had just taught them. Fondo meant bottom, I think you can figure out what it stands for in this context.

I raised another mug full of Coors Light. It wasn't my favorite beer by any means, but I had chosen it because it was easier to swallow in big gulps than other stronger drinks that I enjoyed. This one I put to my mouth and let it flow, being careful not to spill any drops over my chin or else I'd have some people challenging my skill. It wasn't the first time that I'd had a drinking contest, it wasn't the first time I'd had one against a girl. It was the first one that I'd had against one of my own subordinates. Technically speaking, I was still the ruling drinking champion on board the Inconvenience, but there was no way that I could organize another contest outside of my own ODST squad. The officers on the ship were too uptight and all the previous ones were either freezing or burning in space.

Hell, nothing I can do about it.

I was finishing the fourth tankard just as I saw Schitzo's distorted shape waving at me through the bottom of the glass mug. Everything about that wave was insulting, from the exaggerated motions of his hand to the way that he smiled at me as he moved his hand. I lost precious seconds as my head exploded in anger but had enough presence of mind to slam down my glass loudly on the table as I reached for the fifth and final half-pint mug with my other hand.

Grass had pushed herself and reached out for her own last mug just an instant after me, but I had the experience and a slight advantage. I swallowed as much as I could without choking on the beer. Grass was a little bit too eager and I mentally smiled as I heard her coughing out the amber colored liquid. I swallowed the last gulp and slammed my tankard loudly, making the rest of the empty glasses jump an inch off the table.

"Yeah!" I roared drunkenly.

Everyone that was busy watching the drinking contest roared in approval and patted me in the back even as they handed money to Pavel. My friend knew me well enough, and he had decided that betting against me would've been financial suicide. Instead, he found everyone who was rooting on Camilla and made bets with them. The guy must've earned three dozen credits at least. I smiled at the big guy and high-fived him. I would be getting a substantial commission from the bet. I wrecked my liver and he paid me whatever money he made out of it.

Grass was looking annoyed in a way that only someone half-drunk can pull off. She was the center of attention of several troopers that were praising her for her good try. She didn't pay them any more mind than necessary and only thanked them politely before shrugging at me and laughing at a joke that Agnarsson told. If I had been surrounded by as many women as men were surrounding Grass, I swear I would've had sex with them all as soon as possible. Then again, I am a male human, and we are notorious for not thinking with the right organ quite often.

"Nice job," Schitzo said. The quietness of his voice in the loud pub made it creepy to hear. I could understand perfectly what he was saying to me even though I couldn't understand what Scarecrow was yelling in my ear.

"What?" I asked back.

"I said nice job Sarge!"

"Thanks," I replied with a smile. "But I already know that," I added cockily even as I patted the huge man on a muscular shoulder.

Sutton shrugged and turned back to Snark and started talking to him about some thing or another.

I, on the other hand, elbowed my way through the small crowd that had converged on the tall table that we had used as a stadium for our little match. Some yelled drunken compliments at me (which I drunkenly replied) and others simply glared at me for making them loose their hard-earned credits. The entirety of this bar was filled with men and woman from the military. Most were garrisoned in Reach, but there were a few, like us, that weren't.

I finally made my way through the crowd and emerged into an empty section of the pub. I made my way to a booth with a lovely blonde sitting in it and sat next to her, putting my arm around her shoulders. "How you doing gorgeous?"

"You're drunk," the girl said.

"I'm half drunk," I corrected. "And you're not having a good time, what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong!" Marina said suddenly. "Frankie, nothing's wrong."

"Marina…" I pleaded.

"It's just…! It's just that!" she tried saying, stumbling over her words. "Argh!"

I inched closer towards her and let my hand fall from her shoulder down to her upper arm and rubbed it. I did it because it was supposed to be comforting, at least it had been what Layla used to say to me whenever I did it.

"Make sure to remember that this girl isn't Layla," Schitzo said from across the booth. "No matter how hard you want her to be."

I ignored myself and held Marina closer. No matter what my evil hallucinations told me, I knew damn sure that I loved this woman and that I wanted to make happy. The thing is, that it was getting harder and harder to make her happy. I don't know if that was my fault of hers. Probably both of us.

After a minute if both of us staying there without saying anything Marina finally talked. "I don't like her," she said.

"Who?" I played dumb.

"Seppa, the one you call Grass, why do you even call her that?"

"Not sure," I lied. "Something about her legs I think." Normally I wouldn't have lied to her about this, but she seemed to be feeling sensitive and I decided against it. Let's call it a white lie. "Why don't you like her?" I quickly asked.

"Don't know, there's just something about her," my girlfriend said vaguely.

"Yeah, yeah," I agreed. "She's so mean to everyone and doesn't think about anyone but her."

"Yes," Marina agreed, even though Grass had been nothing but nice to her.

"Terrible soldier," I added.

"Couldn't hit an elephant in a hallway," my girlfriend said.

"Talks weird," I invented.

"And she's ugly," Marina ventured.

"Agreed," I lied. The lie was so obvious, so incredibly transparent that I burst out laughing and Marina chuckled slightly, bringing a smile back to her lips. "You're the only girl for me," I reminded her. Even as I said it I thought about it.

"Now, now Frankie, you shouldn't tell lies." It was only the second time that Schitzo had said that phrase. The first time it happened it had scared me half to death, this time it just made me feel like a worthless piece of shit. I would've preferred being scared half to death all over again.

I squeezed Marina even closer to me as I thought about the implications of one part of me not loving her, even if it was a really small part. I'm not really a kind of guy that would cheat on a girl, sure, I like sex and having fun and messing around, but not in that way.

I guess that my uncle was a good influence on that.

Yeah.

"Hey," I said. "Let's steal a pelican, I want to show you something."

All right, all right, sometimes being raised by a hard as nails soldier doesn't really make you perfect.

"Wow," she said. "Who told you about this place?"

"Pavel," I lied. Actually, Hardwick had told me about the shipyard, but I didn't want to give Marina any more reasons to give me shit. "You like it?"
"Yeah," she replied. "Pity we can't stay long, with our stolen pelican and all."

I chuckled and banged the hull a couple of times. The craft was sitting on a flat ridge that I had also been told about by Hardwick. It overlooked the construction site of the UNSC Trafalgar. The first of its class, deemed supercarriers by some guy that had been practical as opposed to imaginative. The UNSC Trafalgar was almost completely done, with only the outer layers missing from the hull. The ship sported two MAC cannons and I could already see the launch tubes of at least a hundred Archer missile pods. I couldn't even begin to fathom the amount of armor that that thing would be able to carry. And I am not even mentioning the enormous complement of longsword fighters and ground troops.

"It's so big," Marina whispered.

"What?" I said, startled. "You can notice it through my pants?" I arranged my pants frantically pretending to be ashamed.

"You know what I am talking about," she laughed.

I did, the Trafalgar was five fucking kilometers in length. Almost as large as a Covenant assault carrier and larger than pretty much anything else that the covvies could field. The sun was just beginning to set behind the supercarrier (yes, I started drinking quite early) and made it look all the more imposing.

"Frank, Sheppard said that he could keep me covered for about an hour and a half?"

"My my," I said, "what are you suggesting?"

Marina glanced at her watch and looked at me. "A quickie."

"Count me in," I said even as I climbed down from the top of the pelican and helped my girlfriend out. It was times like this that remembered me why I loved her.

A quickie later I realized that I didn't love her.

"So, how'd it feel Francisco?" Schitzo asked me.

Like a fucking threesome with your eyes digging holes on the back of my neck.

"Aw, come on, I'm you, no need to get all shy."

I'm not shy! You're just fucking annoying as fuck.

"Am I annoying because I'm annoying or because what I say is the truth?" he asked me.

I tried to keep my mind blank, I really did, but soon enough I slipped up and Schitzo took advantage of the situation and started pressuring me to break up with her. I did my best in ignoring the hallucination, but one does not simply ignore a fully visible hallucination talking about such a sensitive topic. I was forced to listen as he (or I) listed all the reasons why I should end the relationship with Marina Bogdanovic, Warrant Officer. It became clearer and clearer that he was right as my soon-to-be ex-girlfriend piloted back towards the base that she had borrowed this pelican from.

Fine! I admitted to myself, but I can't break up with her right now.

"You'll find the moment," Schitzo said.

Quite unsurprisingly, the sun hit my eyes for a second once he had said that and I was forced to close them. Once I opened them again Schitzo was nowhere to be seen and I was back to sitting alone in the back seat of the Pelican. For some reason, even though Marina was rambling about some nonsense involving a new roommate of hers borrowing a hair dryer without permission, it's hard for me to remember that women are incredibly different from men.

I stood up as the pelican reached its landing pad and deployed its landing gear. I walked towards the cockpit and kissed the beautiful blonde piloting the craft on the cheek as opposed to the lips. All because I had hit myself in the head one too many times and had developed something akin to multiple personality disorder and schizophrenia. "I'll see you back on the ship," I said. "Gotta meet up with Pavel and the rest."

"Love you," Marina said. It felt rather similar to being shot. I looked at her and forced myself to smile before quickly leaving the cockpit. I was already starting to sweat. I had never broken up with a girl before and I had no idea what the hell I was supposed to do without doing it wrong. I was thinking of a dozen different scenarios that went from an amicable mutual break-up to her stabbing me in the groin with her homemade machete.

For some reason the later scenario seemed way more likely than the first one. Marina was as feisty in life as she was feisty in bed. She was as close as it got to being a literal really sharp double-edged sword. Most of the time I only got her good side, but if I went through with this my life would get a little more complicated. At least until she got over it.

What if you're the one that doesn't get over it? I asked myself.

Shit.

I moved through the landing pads and avoided some mechanics that were getting busy drinking beer instead of fixing their ships. Normally I would've been annoyed by that, but my still-slightly-inebriatedenhiabrated state would not allow me to be such a hypocrite. It's funny how much people change without you noticing, isn't it? What's even more funny is that you never notice when you change. I kept on moving towards the parking lot and my nice UNSC-issued hog. Once I had hopped in onreached the monstruousmonstrous truck I hopped up inon it and ran away from a woman that was considerably smaller and physically weaker than me.

I should've felt ashamed.

I drove through the ten-lane driveway and made my way back to downtown New Alexandria. Pavel had actually told me to meet up with him in this restaurant. I found it very weird since Pavel wasn't the kind of guy to go to restaurants, favoring bars, pubs, and clubs. I took an exit and then a couple of wrong turns before finally reaching the place that Pavel had told me to go to. I double checked the message that he sent me to make sure that I was in the right place. I shrugged and hopped out of the car and gave the keyes to the valet. I was forced to stifflestifle a laugh at the sight of the small man trying to climb into on the huge jeep.

The restaurant was your standard luxury restaurant, the only odd thing about it was that it was on surface level despite being in the downtown area. Theseis kind of restaurants were usually located on top of prestigious buildings so that you could get a lovely sight of the city. I walked went inside and skipped the line, walking towards the hostess of the place. As was to be expected with a place like this, the hostess was as close to perfection as a woman could get. The uniform that she was wearing only accentuated her good features.

"Excuse me," I said while the men and women dressed in fancy clothes sneered at me.

"Yes?" the hostess replied in a tired and bored voice as she raised her head. As soon as I made eye contact with her, her demeanor changed. "Sir, what can I help you with?"

I wonder why she suddenly got all giddy…

"Yeah," I said. "Is there a table here for one Pavel Klaus?" I asked. "And am I allowed to go inside like this?" I gestured at my casual outfit consisting of cargo pants, combat boots, and a black t-shirt.

"I don't think it'll be a problem," the hostess said with a practiced smile as she checked her list on a fancy terminal. "Yes, there is one Mr. Klaus in here. Do you want me to escort you to his table?"

"Yes, thank you," I said politely.

The hostess maneuvered through tables, waiters (both human and robotic alike), and patrons deftly and avoided bumping into anything. I was quite impressed really, as in twenty seconds I managed to almost knock down three robotic waiters carrying an unhealthy amount of food and bumped into two old men that sniveled at me and gave me glares. Finally we arrived at a small square table with two chairs only. One of them was occupied by the familiar figure of Sergeant Pavel Klaus.

"Yo, Frank!" he called out, eliciting looks of annoyance from several nearby people. "Over here!"

"I see you," I told him more quietly, "and I can hear you just fine."

"Sorry, sorry," he said, lowering his voice's volume. "Just excited that's all."

"Thank you," I said, looking at the hostess's nametag on her (ample) chest. "Marie."

The hostess blushed and said that she would bring me a menu. I looked at Pavel, who was wearing a napkin on his shirt's neck like a little kid and shook my head with a smile.

"Boy, do girls have a thing for you Frankie," Pavel noted.

"What?" I asked. "Her? No way."

"She was drooling over you Frank."

Under any other circumstances I would've answered that comment with a 'sure' or a 'damn right', but under this particular set of circumstances, I could only give my friend a small smile and place my own napkin on my lap before checking my surroundings. I made sure that there was nothing that could threaten me in this restaurant and relaxed a little. If anything arose, my knife would be just a move away, tucked in nicely between my right boot and my left sock (which I was using on my right foot).

"So, what's the situation?" I asked.

"I finally broke up with Chloe," he exclaimed.

"Really?" I asked, keeping my cool. "How'd it happen?"
The hostess returned personally to give me a menu. I gave her my most dazzling smile as I grabbed the menu and proved Pavel right. The woman blushed and grinned stupidly before she caught herself and turned around quickly. She did like me.

"See?" Pavel pointed out with a fork.

"Ok, you're right," I conceded.

"Of course I am," my friend said smugly as he returned his fork to its place.

"You're right about that gorgeous woman liking me," I added.

Pavel looked dismayed. "How do you spin it to favor you?" he asked me.

"Well, you pretty much did half the spinning yourself, convincing me that she liked me and all."

"Touché" he said.

"Well, back to the point," I said.

"Oh, right." Pavel said with a huge smile akin to that of an elite's. "It seems that she hadn't been sleeping around since I found out," he explained, "and I was getting absolutely bored of waiting for her to slip up and was running out of cash to pay my expensive network of spies."

"You bribed her friends?" I interrupted.

"I even slept with one of them," he said with a grin just as big as the previous one.

Even though right now I didn't really feel like it I forced myself to smile and high-fived my friend as I opened the menu. As I caught a first look at the prices I whistled.

"You can ask for anything you want," Pavel said happily. "It's on me."

"In that case…" I started looking at the prices instead of the dishes. "I'll have the Arcadian Lobster-Crab," I stated.

"Do you even know what that is?" my friend asked. Obviously annoyed that I had asked for the most expensive dish in the menu.

"It's expensive," was what I replied.

Pavel groaned before smiling again. He was very happy, that much was evident. "OK, let me go on…" Pavel went ahead end explained to me throughout the course of the meal o about how he managed to trick Delacroix into confessing that she had cheated on him and then told me the way that he brutally denied her forgiveness when she asked for it. "She even said that it had only been once," Pavel chuckled. Pavel apparently called her a liar and told her that he knew about everyone that she had cheated on him with. Then Pavel called her a few unsavory words that I probably wouldn't have called any girl and left her. "She even cried."I have to admit, it's very hard to feel any kind of sympathy for Chloe, she had it coming and she did sleep around while dating my best friend.

"Good for you man," I said as I grabbed the first bite of my lobster-crab. I made a face. "This tastes like shit," I lied.

"You're going to eat all the fucking plate clean," Pavel said. "I'm not paying for that unless you do."

"I'm kidding," I confessed. "It's actually pretty good."

"Good," Pavel said. "Good."

From that point on the conversation went differently and by the time we were both done without plates we had laughed loudly so many times that there had been several looks directed at us in addition to one complaint. Of course, being soldiers we have a right to be loud and annoying. We're saving these people's lives after all. Not that they would do anything about it of course. ONI does its propaganda job extremely well. I just wonder what people make of the food riots or of the planets disappearing one by one.

"Francisco," Schitzo said, seating down on a spare chair and tucking his napkin on his shirt in the same way as Pavel had. "Isn't there something you should tell our friend?"

My friend, I corrected. Besides, I don't want to ruin the mood.

Pavel paid the bill after giving me several not so subtle hints that I should offer to pay at least one third of the meal. He finally gave his credit card to Marie, the hostess and grumbled something unintelligible. He finally removed his napkin from his shirt and placed it right next to his dish. "You know," he said. "I once heard that if a girl's name ends with an 'ie' when it should end with a 'y' it's because she loves sex."

"Where'd you hear that?" I asked.

"I think Agnarsson might've mentioned it," Pavel mused. "Speaking about, what the hell is wrong with your call signs?"

"Hey, they're supposed to suck," I explained. "I wasn't about to go calling them Overlord or Deathwire."

"Scarecrow?" Pavel asked with a raised eyebrow.

"All right, I like Sutton, that's why I gave him a better call sign."

"Are you sure you won't change them?" he asked me.

"I might," I shrugged. "Provided they do something that makes it worth it. Hey," I laughed, "they'll evolve, just like in Pokemon."

"What the hell is Pokemon?"

"Never mind, just some weird ass videogame from half a millennium ago."

"Agnarsson?" Pavel asked.

"Yup," I said. "Despite feeling like I'm moving cubes around, it's somewhat addictive."

"Yeah," Pavel agreed. "All of Agnarsson's weird shit tends to be. Anyways, what could you change the call signs to?" he asked.

"I dunno, Angel would become Archangel, it's certainly more badass. Caboose could evolve into Freight Train or something train-related. Maybe Maglev. Bumblebee could ev-"

"Please don't say evolve," Pavel interrupted. "It's weird."

"Bumblebee could become Hornet, but Agnarsson seems to be happy with his call sign."

"Trust me," Pavel said. "He'll jump at a chance to change it."

"If you say so," I backed off.

"That should be it," Marie said as soon as she returned without the check. "Thanks for coming here," she said, directing her radiant smile mostly to me.

"One question," Pavel said. "Why did you attend us personally instead of a waiter?"

Marie's smile twitched briefly before she regained composure. "We pride ourselves in offering nothing short of the best service."

"All right," Pavel said with more than enough sarcasm in his voice. "We'll be going, thanks for everything. Frank, you can take care of the tip."

I suppressed a groan and pulled out my credit card. I swiped it on a datapad that the hostess offered me and gave her twenty credits worth of tips. It was a lot, more than twenty percent of what Pavel had paid for the whole meal, but Marie had done a great job and I was feeling kind for some odd reason.

"Thank you, sir," Marie said with a smile as she reached for her pocket. "My shift ends at four," she said, her professional tone changing to a more flirty one and handing me a note with a series of digits written on it.

"And I deploy at six," I told her, reaching into my shirt and pulling out my dogtags. "Maybe next time," I suggested.

Marie's happy face went to sad in an instant before she shrugged and blew on her hair. "Maybe next time," she agreed. "Frank."

I smiled at her one last time before turning around and catching up with Pavel. I showed him my prize and he just shook his head. "I would've thought that you'd tell her that you have a girlfriend."

I shrugged, not wanting to be caught in a lie. Or at least, half a lie.

"That's my car," I said, pointing out the civilian hog that I had been issued for the duration of my leave. Nezarian had given me the number to one of his friends and I managed to get a car. It beat moving by bus or cab. The huge vehicle looked completely out of place next to the expensive luxury cars and the occasional sports car. The valet hopped out of it somewhat stylishly and gave me my keys.

"Sweet ride," he said.

"Thanks," I replied. I hopped onto the hog in a practiced maneuver and waved at Pavel, who looked at me with jealousy as the crappy model that he had rented came in after my monstrous car. I laughed at him and turned on the hog, feeling a nice sense of satisfaction as the engine turned on and the vehicle started shaking. I revved the engine a couple of times just to piss off Pavel before finally pushing the accelerator.I drove through the unfamiliar streets of New Alexandria without a particular goal in mind. While it was true that the Inconvenience would be deploying just a few hours from now, all my things were packed and the trip would be long enough to warrant cryo, so I really didn't have to worry about a good night's sleep.

I drove through the city for several hours. New Alexandria was really something to look at. It wasn't the largest city in Reach, but it was certainly the most impressive. Only architects that were (literally) universally acclaimed had the opportunity to build in the city. Most of the constructions were skyscrapers reaching in average eight hundred meters in height. There were some buildings that outdid all the rest. Olympic Tower, the ONI headquarters was one, despite what it represented. There were some other buildings that stood out as well, the Vyrant Telecom Tower was another example. The club on top of it was said to be one of the best, even though it had just opened very recently. I finally decided to start heading to the hotel and back to the ship after two hours of driving erratically and after almost crashing for the third time. I was tired.

I heaved my bag over my shoulder and elbowed soldiers out of the way. We were ferried back to the Inconvenience in an Albatross ship, it was mostly empty except for my team and a couple of late arrivals that were looking very hungover. As soon as the large transport craft docked with the Inconvenience up in space I tossed my duffel bag to Pavel and told him to put it on my bed. He agreed after complaining loudly.

I moved through the corridors and had to avoid bumping into several swabbies and regulars milling about to finish anything they needed to get done before being put into cryo for a couple of months. It was annoying when this happened, but since I was in my semi-formal all black uniform everyone was wise enough to get out of the way and let me pass through the middle of the corridors and hallways. Still, it was pretty crowded and I had to do some mild maneuvering.

Jeez, you lazy bastard, I told myself. No Schitzo this time.

After intimidating enough people through the use of my uniform and my physique I managed to reach the place that I was looking for. Marina's door was no different than any of the other doors on the ship save for a screen displaying her name and those of her three roommates. I knocked on the door because I knew that her doorbell wasn't working. A lovely blonde opened the door and smiled at me, driving daggers through my resolve.

"Marina," I said. "We need to talk."

Uh-oh, he's certainly in for some serious shit. I was just wondering what you guys think of my non-action chapters. I know that they most certainly don't have the same popularity as combat based chapters, but having some feedback is always good and nice. Talking about feedback, it has recently come to my attention that I could do a lot better with character development, anything you'd like? After all, I'm writing this for you. :)

As always, thanks to Sniper Fodder for proof-reading this chapter.

-casquis