This chapter will be a lot of talking. A whole lot of talking. It will also go into some detail of Callie's past. This is just a warning.

**WARNING - THIS FIC CONTAINS THE SUBJECT OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE**

I own nothing. All characters/storylines belong to Shonda. I'm simply 'borrowing' them.

I Will Be

Her mind going a million miles a minute, Callie felt her mouth instantly dry up. She wants me to talk about her? Why? Why would she do that to me? Feeling the tears forming in her own eyes, she closed them and placed her head back against the couch. "I-I, uh-"

"I don't want you to talk about anything you aren't comfortable with. I just meant like, how you met, you know?"

Sighing, Callie ran her fingers through her hair. "I guess that would be okay."

"It's okay if you'd rather not." Arizona placed a hand on her girlfriend's knee. "I just, I don't know much about the beginning. It's totally fine if you don't want me to know any of that, a girl can try, though, right?" Giving the brunette a smile, it was clear that Callie was struggling. "You know what? Never mind. Fancy a movie?" Dimples popped as she tried to keep her girlfriend calm.

"Um, sure." Tanned shoulders shrugged. Draining her wine glass, Callie poured another and settled herself back down in her spot. "You pick."

Deciding on a romantic comedy, Arizona placed the disc in the player and positioned herself as close to her girlfriend as possible. Lacing their fingers together, she hit play and propped her feet up on the coffee table.

"I was working the early shift at the hospital," Callie stated.

What is she talking about? "Um, when?" Arizona furrowed her brow.

"W-When I met Suzanne."

"Oh." Blue eyes widened when she realised what her girlfriend was about to get into. Deciding not to push, she waited for Callie to talk in her own time.

"I'd had a rough day. Well, you could say it had been a rough year." The brunette laughed. "I'd spent most of it sleeping with my best friend purely for the sake of it. So, yeah, it had been a crappy year."

"Mark?" The blonde raised an eyebrow.

"H-How do you know about him?" Callie questioned.

"Karev mentioned it a while ago. You hadn't told me about him so I figured you didn't want me to know. So, I just left it at that." Pale shoulders shrugged. "It's no big deal."

"I don't speak to him anymore. I didn't think it was worth telling you. It's not like he's going to appear and you will have anything to worry about. He was my best friend. Anything that went on between us was meaningless. We'd both always maintained that."

"Why don't you speak anymore?" Not wanting to make this conversation all about Suzanne, Arizona tried to coax a little more of Callie's past out of her. Expecting the answer to be not Suzanne related, she figured it was an acceptable question to ask.

"He, um, he didn't like the idea of me and Suzanne being together. He said something wasn't right with her. I guess he was right, huh?" She scoffed. "Suzanne didn't like how our relationship was, even though we weren't sleeping together anymore. She, uh, told me I couldn't see him anymore."

"But he worked at the hospital, right? He was a surgeon."

"Yeah, he was. Another hospital wanted him. Better offer. A tonne of money. So, he went. We haven't spoken since."

"Maybe you should call him. Or maybe even just enquire about his whereabouts. Seems a shame that you would lose your best friend over something and nothing." Blue eyes glistened.

"I-I don't know." She shrugged. "I think too much time may have passed. I know it would have if it was the other way round. I'd be pissed if he called me after all this time."

"He never called you? Not even once?"

"No, he said goodbye when he was leaving, but that was about it. We'd drifted apart. He was very, um, handsy. He's a good guy. A great guy. She just hated him being around, so I said some nasty things to him. I didn't realise at the time that she was being controlling. I kind of got it. I could see why she didn't want me to be around him, but I'd never have gone back to him. Not while I was dating her."

So she would go back to him if she was single? Not your place to ask, Robbins. Leave it at that. "Yeah, I know." Giving the brunette's thigh a squeeze, Arizona smiled.

"She asked if she could take me out to dinner." Brown eyes narrowed. "She was visiting a friend at the hospital and I was waiting for the elevator. I remember the scent of her perfume. That's what caused me to glance at her. As soon as she caught me looking, she started the flirting. Very open. Very forward. It was nice. The attention. The idea that some complete stranger found me attractive."

How does this woman not know that she is hot? Just giving a slight nod, Arizona let her girlfriend continue in her own time.

"So, three nights later, I found myself in a restaurant with her. It was nice. Expensive. I mean, I wasn't bothered how expensive it was, but I could tell she was trying to woo me."

"And did she?" Please say no.

"She did, yeah." Callie gave a small smile.

Damn!

"We had a great night. Talked a tonne. Flirted nonstop. It just, it was nice, you know? The attention was nice. The idea of it turning into something more than just dinner. The idea of it becoming a relationship, I was so ready. Ready to stop fooling around with Mark."

"Yeah, I guess fooling around is always fun until, well…until it's not." Arizona agreed as she took a sip from her beer bottle.

"Yeah. My friends were all in relationships and I was sick of being the odd one out. I mean, I didn't need to feel included, but the idea of joining them on dates was nice. I won't lie, we did have some good times together."

"Yeah?" Arizona smiled. I'm so happy that she was happy at some point.

"Yeah. We laughed a lot. Spent a lot of time together. Like, every minute I wasn't working, she would come over to my apartment and we would just kick back, you know?" Realising that this conversation wasn't so bad, Callie turned in her seat and sat cross-legged facing Arizona. "We would cook dinner together, we would spend the entire day in bed. Just, being a couple, I guess."

"That's nice." Arizona turned to face her girlfriend. She didn't have much else to say. She didn't want to ask any questions. She didn't want to drag Callie back into that dark place they had visited so often over the past year or so.

"Yeah, it really was. I never thought anything was wrong. I mean, why would I? The sex was great, she was great." Watching Arizona's expression change, she gave her a sad smile. "Sorry, I didn't mean to bring up the sex."

"Don't apologise. We've all been in previous relationships. Pretty sure everyone has sex, too." The blonde laughed. Ugh! The thought of her, with her hands…NO! Stop!

"Yeah, doesn't mean you needed to hear that, though." Callie smiled. "About six months in, I asked her to move in with me. It made sense. She was always at my place. So why bother leaving every couple of days? Why bother paying rent on two separate places."

"Yeah, of course." God, I wish that had been me.

"Maybe six months was a little too early, I don't know." She shrugged. "I think it was around a month after she moved in with me, that things, um, things…changed."

Sensing the shift in her girlfriend's body language, Arizona took her hand in her own and gave it a gentle squeeze. "We can stop you know?"

"No, I'm okay. This is kind of...therapeutic?"

"Oh, okay." Arizona laughed. "Just, don't go into anything you don't want to. I'm always here to listen to you, Calliope, but I don't want you to upset yourself. I don't want to be the cause of your upset."

"I know." Brown eyes glistened. "I like talking to you, though. I know I don't always show it, but I do, and you don't judge. You just, you are patient, and you don't push me. I-I, thank you."

"I'd never judge you, baby. You know you can talk to me whenever you feel you need to. Even if that means waking me up at 3 am because something is on your mind. I'll always listen."

"You know, you are something else, Arizona." Callie smiled. "So, after things changed, I felt stuck. Like, I didn't feel as though I could talk to anyone. I'd pushed Mark away. I'd not been overly friendly with my friends at the hospital, and I just felt alone. Really alone. It was just small things at first. Just, putting me down for what I was wearing. Or, saying dinner wasn't very nice. I could live with that. I know I'm no oil painting, and I've never professed to be some sort of goddess, so, I could live with that. It was when she started saying it in public, or in front of our friends. That's when it bothered me. It just made me feel crap."

Deciding not to say anything, Arizona sat back, stunned. She knew that if she opened her mouth, she would either cry or use a select choice of words to describe the woman who had ruined her girlfriend's life. That wouldn't help either of them right now. I swear I will rip that woman's face off with my bare fucking hands if I ever see her again.

"I called her out on it, and it stopped for a while. I'd bring home flowers and gifts for her. At first, she loved it. Then she told me to stop. She said if I brought her anything home again, she would know that I'd been cheating on her. Only people who are guilty of something bring home flowers. That's what she told me." Scoffing, dark curls shook. "Looking back, it was like she never wanted me to love her. I don't know what I did wrong, or where I went wrong. I just wanted to be happy with her. I really did.I wanted to make her happy."

"You didn't do anything wrong, Calliope," Arizona spoke barely above a whisper. Her knees now up to her chest, she once again silenced herself.

"The first time she used her hands, it was, uh, it was a Friday evening. I'd been delayed at the hospital, and she hated it. I'd told her that it was a part of my job. That I wouldn't always be around. I'd tried to finish on time so she wouldn't get wound up, but this Friday night, I'd been called for a consult as I was about to walk out of the door. Turned out to be nothing and I wasn't needed, but it meant I got home about twenty minutes late."

"Cal-"

Cutting off her girlfriend, Callie held up her hand between them and continued. "When I got home, she was pacing the floor and muttering to herself. I knew she would be angry, I knew she would shout. It was her favourite thing to do. I think she loved the sound of her own voice more than anything else. After I apologised and explained what had happened, she uh, s-she backhanded me across the face." Shuddering at the memory, Callie quickly shook herself off. She'd never planned on this tonight, and even though Arizona had told her she didn't have to go into detail, she found herself unable to stop. Like she needed to say everything in her head, out loud. "The pain, God, I can remember it like it was just yesterday."

"Callie?" Arizona's voice broke. I'm not sure I can handle this.

"No, please let me continue." The brunette gave her girlfriend a sad smile. "Please?"

"Okay." Arizona gave a slight nod. Push through, Robbins. She trusts you enough to tell you all of this.

"She apologised as soon as it had happened, and after I'd given her the silent treatment for a while, I finally came around. Later on, she said she'd never have done that if I'd have stuck to my word and came home on time. I know how it works, I know they say things and then do it again, but I thought it was just a one-time thing. Figured she'd just lost her temper and that was all." Stopping to take a sip of her wine, she cleared her throat. "It didn't happen again for a week or two. She still always had something to complain about. Always. Complaining, and beating is two different things, though."

"Can I ask you something, Calliope?" You sure you want to do this? You sure you want to ask questions when she is freely pouring her heart out to you?

"Sure."

"Why did you agree to marry her?" Desperately hoping that she hadn't gone a step too far, Arizona held her breath.

"Because she promised it wouldn't happen anymore. She told me she couldn't live without me. I mean, I don't think I ever really wanted to marry her, and I kind of hoped I'd wear the ring but nothing would ever come of it. I guess I just wanted to feel like someone wanted me." She gave the blonde a sad smile. "She didn't ask me until after the first time I'd left her. She had beaten me pretty bad one night because I got a call from a new doctor at the hospital. Wanting to get in on my research, she'd called and asked if we could meet the following morning at the hospital. Suzanne heard and assumed that something was going on between us. Like she always did." Running her fingers through her hair, brown eyes narrowed as she recalled the events of that night. "That was the first night she choked me." Eyes closing, Callie sighed. "She took my cell from me, called the hospital and told them I was sick in bed, and then she choked me."

Watching tears fall from the baby blues staring back at her, Callie reached out and wiped them away. "Don't cry, Arizona."

"S-Sorry." Blonde curls shook as she tried to remove the images from her head. How is she being so strong right now? How is she sitting here saying all of this?

"That was when I knew I had to leave. No matter how angry someone gets, I know that choking someone is not right. Punching a wall or throwing something, yes, but choking the person they supposedly love? No." Shaking her head, she laughed. "You know what? She wasn't even that strong. I mean, I could have easily taken her in a fight. No doubt about it. But I couldn't. I couldn't because I'm not that kind of person. I'd never intentionally hurt someone. No matter how much they'd hurt me."

Taking a breath and another sip of wine, Callie continued. "After she'd choked me. She dragged me to the floor and forced her foot down on my chest. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't think. I just lay there. I lay there and took it." Laughing, she shrugged her shoulders and tried to gauge Arizona's reaction. "Even as she kicked me and knocked the wind out of me, I just lay there. I don't think I even cried. I just felt… nothing."

"Callie, I-" Bringing her hand to her mouth, Arizona was lost for words. This woman is nothing short of amazing.

"So I left. When she went off to take a shower and pulled myself up from the floor, and I left. I went to daddy's hotel, and I locked myself away. I knew she would find me, but I had no place else to go. I didn't have any friends I could stay with. Not without them wanting to know why I had shown up at their door anyway. She came knocking around midnight. I was sleeping. I'd taken some pain relief for my broken ribs and I'd managed to sleep. When I opened the door, she looked awful. Destroyed. She literally dropped to her knees and clung to me. I didn't know what to do. I hadn't expected her to be so upset. I brought her inside my room so we didn't wake anyone and she begged me to come home. She promised me she wouldn't do it again and said she would get some help. She even suggested anger management. Stupid me fell for it." Callie rolled her eyes. "When we got back to the apartment she had cleaned the place up and took me to bed. I'd never heard her apologise so much. She was kind and she was so gentle with me. After we'd, you know? She just blurted it out. Asked me to marry her. She even had a ring for me. I just, I was shocked. I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to rile her up again, so I said yes."

"You said yes so she wouldn't get angry." Arizona sighed. When I ask you, it will be because we are happy, in love, and unable to live without each other. Oh god, did you just think about marriage?

"Yeah." Giving her girlfriend a sad smile, she moved a little closer to her. "I just, I couldn't take any more pain. I thought if I said yes, she would stop the beating. I thought she would actually love me. You know, the way two people are supposed to be when they get engaged."

"But she didn't." The blonde stated.

"No." Callie laughed. "This is Suzanne we are talking about. Things just got worse, and more frequent."

"Callie, I'm so sorry you went through all of that." Blue eyes glistened as Arizona struggled to hold back her emotions. Don't cry. This isn't about you. Callie has been strong, so you have to.

"Me too. I should never have gone back to her. I just, I just wanted to be loved. I just wanted love from the one person I'd have done anything for."

"I know, baby." Reaching out, the blonde placed her hand on her girlfriend's cheek and ran her thumb along. "You didn't deserve any of that. No one does."

"Then you came to the hospital." Callie smiled. "You just, you made me feel like I used to. When you spoke to me, I could see you weren't judging me. You didn't know me, and you simply wanted to get to know me. You weren't pushy. You just, you were kind. You are kind." Leaning into the blonde's touch, Callie closed her eyes. "You were everything I'd ever wanted in a friend. Truthfully, I didn't think we would end up together. I wanted us to, yes, but I just thought you were being a friend. "

"You were a little closed off, but I just figured that was because you didn't know me," Arizona stated. "If I'd have known, Cal. If I'd have known what you were going through at home I'd have gotten you out of there immediately." Right before I'd ripped Suzanne's head from her scrawny body.

"I don't know why I called you that day. I guess I just knew I could trust you. I never expected you to invite me into your home. Honestly, I don't know what I expected. But you were great. You didn't question anything. You didn't pressure me into going to the police. You were just there for me. That was all I needed."

"I'll always be here for you, Calliope." Inching closer, Arizona pressed a light kiss to red lips. "No matter what, I'll always be here."

"I don't want you to be afraid of disagreements with me, Arizona. I don't want you to be worried that we may fight and I'll be scared of you. I just, it will take a little time. I know you are nothing like her. I know you would never hurt me."

"Promise?" Blue eyes dropped their gaze. We needed this. We had to do this tonight.

"I promise. I could never be scared of you. Sure, everything won't be perfect. No couple is. But, I want us to be normal. I need us to be normal. If you are unhappy, tell me. I can take it. If you are mad at me, tell me. You are the sweetest person I've ever met, and I know that whatever we row about, you would use your words, and only your words. You don't have a bad bone in your body, Arizona."

"You have no idea how good it feels to hear you say that. I just, I was really worried when we fought the other week. I thought I'd messed up, big time."

"No, baby. I'd messed up. Not only do I trust that you would never hurt me physically, I also know you would never cheat, or leave me. Not unless we weren't happy together."

"I've never been happier, Cal. What I said to Natalie, about how being with you had meant more than all the years I'd spent with her? I meant that. I meant it more than you could ever know."

"You really feel like that?" Callie smiled.

"I do. We just, we fit. We fit perfectly. If we'd have met all those years ago, I know for sure that we would have been perfect then, too."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," Arizona stated as she pulled her girlfriend into her body. Lay back, Callie lay her body down on top of the blonde and felt her heart beating against her own. "I want that house, Cal. I want it all with you."

"I do, too." The brunette smiled as she propped her head up on her hand, elbow bent. Tracking Arizona's collarbone, she sighed. "I want it, like yesterday."

"Me too." Running her fingers through dark hair, Arizona smiled into their kiss. "We missed the movie."

Laughing, Callie pulled back. "Yeah, sorry about that."

"Oh, don't be." A dimpled smile appeared. "I'd rather talk with you than watch some unrealistic movie."

"Thank you for listening."

"Thank you for letting me in. I don't want you to bottle things up. Anytime you need an ear, I have two."

"I know." Callie smiled.

I can never lose this woman. No matter what we go through, what she goes through, I will be there for her. Forever. She is too special to lose. Far too good for me, but I'll always make her happy. I'll always be the one to give her what she needs.

Thanks for reading, guys. Looking forward to your reviews. So, I have the next update almost finished. Are you all wanting it uploaded tonight?Let me know...