AN: Once again, thank you so much for all of the reviews! I honestly appreciate them and it motivates me to continue on. Also, thank you to those who follow and favorite! I appreciate you as well but I would love to hear your feedback.

When Bonnie woke that afternoon, she felt much better than she did that morning. Her body still ached and her gums throbbed but she wasn't chained to the bed so she sat up, stretched her arms, and counted her blessings. The boarding house was silent other than the whisper of Caroline's voice. Bonnie realized that the blonde and Stefan were downstairs, watching the 'Notebook', and of course, Caroline was near tears.

'I want a love like that.' Caroline whispered.

Stefan scoffed, 'What about me?'

'What we have is special, Stefan and I love you, but-' Caroline hesitated. Bonnie didn't need her to finish the sentence to understand what was implied because she felt the same. Sure, she could fall in love but she would never grow old with her husband. She would never have children. She would never live the life that, prior to a week ago, had been inevitable. It was a lot to take in but something that she needed to come to terms with.

Throwing her feet over the side of the bed, she tip-toed into Damon's bathroom that, luckily, wasn't trashed. She craved a long, hot, bubble bath and Damon's bath tub seemed like the perfect size to wash her worries away in. As she ran the water, she shed her bra and panties like dead skin before sinking into the steaming water; sighing as she lay her head back, closed her eyes, and let the bubbles cover her naked form.

After soaking for more than an hour, she was sure that she was no longer a woman but a prune. Slowly, she made her way out of the bathtub and stood in front of the mirror. Wiping a single-hand across the glass, she caught one glimpse of herself and sighed.

Clad in nothing but a dark towel that she had taken from Damon's closet, her hair was a mess of damp curls falling to the middle of her back that resembled the unruly mane of a lion and her normally caramel skin was pale with dark circles beneath her dim eyes.

She looked as dead as she felt.

Sighing, she grabbed a new toothbrush from out of the closet as well as some facial cream that she recognized as belonging to Elena and began to clean herself up the best she could. As she was drying her hair, a sweet, masculine scent filled her nostrils, halting her movements entirely. It wasn't the cologne that she was used to but, for some reason, it reminded her of Damon. All at once, a strange feeling of warmth enveloped her and she wanted to revel in it. She turned her attention from the mysterious fragrance to her reflection in the mirror, yelping as she ran her fingers over the circles beneath her eyes where dark veins were now throbbing, 'What the fuck?'

No sooner than the words left her mouth, the door to the bathroom was thrown open, replaced with a frantic looking Damon, 'What's wrong?'

'What are you doing? Where did you come from?' She screeched, clutching the towel to her chest.

'I was coming to check on you but when I heard you scream, I thought something was wrong.'

'Nothing's wrong!' She lied. Something was wrong but Bonnie couldn't explain it. Now that Damon was standing before her, she was sure that the scent from earlier was an extension of him. His scent had always been pleasant but for some reason, it was eliciting a different response from her mind and body. As it filled her nostrils, her mind became fogged and she felt as if she was floating on a bed of clouds. Hell, she couldn't focus on anything else. She wanted to curl up in the warmth of his scent and latch on to it forever.

'But you screamed.' He said, plainly. Pulling her from her thoughts.

'I didn't mean to scare you. I'm just-' She ran a nervous hand through her hair 'I'm just getting used to everything.'

'Good that's another reason that I came up here,' He looked her up and down suspiciously; not believing her lie but not wanting to press her any harder than he had to 'I'm taking you out for some training. Are you up for drinks?'

No! Her mind screamed but she couldn't form the words. Could she handle being around him right now? His smell alone was driving her up the damned wall. She couldn't tell him that, though. He wouldn't let her live it down, 'I don't think that's a good idea, Damon.'

He raised an eyebrow, walking over to where she stood in front of the mirror, 'Is something wrong?'

Yes, how close you are to me right now is a problem. The words were on the tip of her tongue but once again, she couldn't formulate a proper response other than, 'No! Stop asking.'

'I know when something's bothering you, Bon,' He grabbed her wrist and turned her around to face him instead of talking to her reflection in the mirror 'Tell the truth. That was the promise you made.'

'I'm working on the spell and I think that I should stay home and finish that.' Lie number two.

'I thought you started on it earlier?'

'I did.'

'Then finish it and meet me at the Grille in one hour,' He said, turning and walking towards the bathroom door 'I'm paying. Don't make me wait, Bennett.'

Bennett-Salvatore

'Thank God.'

Bonnie visibly relaxed as she entered the practically empty Grille. She silently thanked God that having someone instead of a drink was no longer such a temptation as she feared on the way over from the boarding house. Normally, the Grille was packed to the max, a mixture of college students and residents rushing in to catch a quick bite before returning to their busy lives. She wasn't sure what was different about tonight but she wanted to kiss every single person in Mystic Falls for having a life outside of the Grille.

Still, she contemplated turning around and running full-speed back to the boarding house until she heard Damon's voice from across the room, 'Nice dress. Hot date tonight?'

'Very funny.' She deadpanned, before using her senses to find their table. Inhaling, she choked; his scent and the bourbon he loved to consume were so potent, it almost knocked her on her ass. Still, she followed it around the restaurant until she found him, sitting alone in a booth.

'How nice of you to grace us with your presence, Vampire Queen!' He gestured to the seat across from him 'Please, have a seat.'

She glared at him, sliding in to the booth, 'Don't be an asshole.'

'I don't understand what you mean.' Damon flashed his infamous smirk before picking up the menu that lay in front of him.

'You understand perfectly what I mean.'

'Should I get the cheeseburger or the chicken strips?'

Bonnie scoffed, 'Don't be condescending. We both know that nothing on that menu is worth your time or mine.'

Damon put the menu down, taking a moment to note Bonnie's attitude, 'Someone's in a bad mood.'

'I've been in a bad mood since I woke up as a damned vampire. Me being out in public, fighting the urge to eat the waiter is just the icing on the cake.' She bit out, picking up her own menu.

He stared at her for a moment, unsure of what to say, before the waitress came to take their orders, breaking the silence that was a result of Bonnie's admission.

Once the blonde-haired waitress, Lauren - who Damon compelled to get lost after taking their orders and returning with their food - made her way across the room, he turned his attention back to Bonnie. She noticed his glare and immediately closed her eyes in frustration, refusing to make eye contact with him. His scent was becoming overwhelming and the more she looked at him, the harder it became to sit there. She knew that they were here for what Damon referred to as 'in the field' training, but she wasn't sure of how much longer she could restrain herself.

Damon sat his glass back on the table and sat back, 'Are you going to tell me what's wrong or do I have to play the guessing game with you?'

He sat back but his gaze didn't leave hers. She couldn't keep lying to him but she didn't know exactly how to tell him. She sighed, 'I just didn't know the spell would take so much out of me.'

'We're friends, right?' He asked, his eyebrow raised.

Bonnie snorted, 'I would hardly call a bunch of phone conversations and sleepovers a friendship.' She deadpanned.

Damon smiled at her sarcasm, 'God, I sound like a teenage girl.' He paused 'Or Stefan.'

'You are a teenage girl for asking something like that.' Bonnie laughed, relaxing slightly.

'Come on, Bon, admit it' His smirk grew 'I'm like a fever you can't shake.'

How ironic, she thought. That's exactly how he was making her feel now, 'If I wasn't your friend, Damon, I wouldn't be here with you after everything you've done.'

It was Damon's turn to avoid her gaze, his lips pinched and guilt playing out through his features. He'd done so much wrong but nothing would compare to the monster he'd allowed himself to become over the previous six months, 'I know.'

'Okay, then.'

'I actually thought about getting the memories taken before I turned it off,' He paused, staring into the bottom of the bourbon glass, looking at nothing but allowing the shock to settle with Bonnie 'I could've avoided everything but I chose to feel, knowing that, that type of pain would turn me into a monster.'

'So, why did you do it?' Bonnie asked.

'I knew that you would be the one to get me back,' He smiled, weakly, and finally looked into her eyes. She never saw him look so broken before and it tore her, 'I didn't expect it to happen like this but I needed to feel it all to let it go.'

Bonnie watched him carefully before speaking, 'Damon, where are you going with this?'

'I know that I've made some pretty shitty decisions recently but you-' He paused 'I need you to know and understand that I would never intentionally hurt you. if anything, I want to protect you. Not because of the promise that I made to Emily but because you are my best friend. Do you know that?'

'I don't need protecting.'

'That's not what I asked,' He sat forward, those bright-blue eyes flashing wildly, showing his seriousness 'Do you know that I will protect you?'

She sighed, shaking her head, 'I do.'

'You and Stefan have the same annoying effect on me. I cherish you and your opinion,' He stated simply 'So, either you can tell me what's really bothering you or I will hound you all night for an answer but either way, I am going to figure it out. because now you are starting to bother me.'

He stared into Bonnie's eyes as if he had the ability to look directly into her soul. He searched her features for a clue, anything to help him understand what was going on behind those forest-green eyes.

She shrunk under the penetration of his gaze, realizing that she couldn't run from this. She checked the grimoire over and over for any piece of information on why she was so - attracted to Damon's scent. Why she feened his presence - but she couldn't find anything. Maybe the best thing to do was to tell him the truth, 'Damon, I-' She stopped mid-sentence, staring at the man who appeared at Damon's side seemingly out of thin air.

'Bonnie.'

'Jeremy-' Bonnie started in confusion 'What are you doing here? I thought you were away at school.'

'Yeah, Gilbert,' Damon looked up from his drink 'I thought you were away coloring or something?'

Jeremy mugged Damon for a moment before turning his attention to Bonnie as she stood up and he took her in his arms, 'I got a call from Caroline telling me to come home. What's going on?'

He released Bonnie and she wanted to disappear. She didn't want to be the one to tell Jeremy that Elena was dead. She knew that this could happen but hoped that she had a little more time to figure everything out, 'Jer, can we talk about this later? It's complicated.'

'It's actually quite simple-' Damon mumbled into his bourbon glass, Bonnie cut her eyes in his direction 'I'm going to let you handle this. I'm not nearly drunk enough.'

'I'm sorry, Jer,' She sighed 'Elena's dead.'

He stumbled back, eyeing Bonnie as if she had grown a second head, 'But how? What happened?'

Bonnie turned to Damon, silently pleading for his assistance. He stood up and put his hand on Jeremy's shoulder, 'I'm sorry, Little Gilbert. It's a long story but not one for tonight.'

'I asked Bonnie,' Jeremy spat as he moved out of Damon's grasp and towards Bonnie 'Even though I'm sure he had something to do with it, what happened, Bonnie?'

She sighed and grabbed Jeremy's arm, 'Come. We'll talk.'

Damon stepped forward, shaking his head, 'I don't think that's a good idea.'

Bonnie ignored Damon's disapproval and continued towards the bathrooms, leading Jeremy into the women's, 'Come in and close the door behind you,' She checked the stalls to make sure that they were alone before whispering a spell and locking the door. She leaned against the sink for support. 'Ask away.'

'What's going on?' His voice was full of emotion as he took a step towards her, clenching and unclenching his fists, 'I'm confused. I come home and find out that not only are you home but my sister is dead which doesn't make sense. You're alive so she should still be in a coma.'

'Jeremy, I'm so sorry. I really am-'

'Enough!' He yelled, grabbing her arm 'Tell me what happened! Why are you alive and she's not?'

'Because I'm not!' She screeched, attempting to push away from him, 'I'm not alive. I've transitioned.'

Jeremy gripped her tighter, forcing her to look at him. She noticed that the warm eyes she once was in love with were clouded over with hurt and what seemed to be rage. She swallowed and looked away, 'What the hell did you do?'

'I didn't do anything! There was an accident-'

'An accident?' Jeremy bit out 'You're full of shit! You did this on purpose.'

Bonnie looked at Jeremy and it was like she was seeing him for the first time. She was stunned that he would imply she asked for this to happen, 'Do you think that I wanted this? To become this? You know me, Jer.'

'Do I?' Jeremy rolled his eyes 'I always knew that you were jealous of her.'

'Jealous?' Bonnie couldn't believe her ears.

'She sacrificed herself for you and you still found a way to get her out of the picture with him.'

'Are you serious? How could you think that I would do something like that? Elena was my best friend.'

'Yeah. Some best friend you are.'

'I didn't do anything! I didn't ask Kai to link my life to Elena's. I didn't want any of this to happen, Jer. You have to believe me.'

'This is your fault! You and Damon think you're so slick but everyone noticed how you two were after returning. Why else would Kai link your life to Elena's?'

'This is not on me, Jer.'

'I've lost my sister, my only living relative,' Jeremy paused and Bonnie closed her eyes in disbelief. How could he blame her for something that was out of her hands? Jeremy began to speak again, his voice low and menacing 'I should've let you die in that gara-' With a flick of her wrist, she had him pinned against the wall.

Her eyes shut as rage filled her veins, boiling her blood. When she opened them again, Jeremy gasped. Her eyes were snow white with black veins snaking along her cheeks, 'What the hell, Bonnie?'

'How dare you.' Bonnie bit out, lifting her hand and closing it as Jeremy began to squirm against the wall, pain spreading throughout his chest.

'Bonnie-' He said, attempting to breathe 'I-I'm sorry.'

'You're sorry?' Bonnie cackled as she tightened the grip her magic had on his heart and made her way closer to him, smiling the entire time 'Oh, (i)sweetheart, I am too. This is going to hurt.'

Jeremy screamed as her fangs sunk into the side of his neck while her magic retained its hold on him, rendering him immobile. She moaned against his throat as the warm blood flowed into her mouth and pooled in the pit of her stomach. It was her first time feeding from the vein and she could understand why Stefan had the tendency to over-indulge. She didn't want to stop, not even as Damon banged on the door behind her. His pleas fell on deaf ears until she felt herself being torn away from Jeremy.

Damon rushed to his side, bit into his wrist and pressed it against his mouth, urging him to drink. She looked down at the arms that were wrapped around her and recognized Caroline's perfectly manicured nails, 'Let me go, Care.'

'Not until you get a freaking grip, Bonnie Bennett!' She hissed, tightening her grip as Matt walked in to the already crowded bathroom, surveying the damage before looking at Bonnie and stumbling back in surprise 'Bonnie, your eyes.'

'What the hell, Bonnie?' Damon looked up at her, wild-eyed and confused.

'Isn't this your idea of in the field training? The old feed and erase?' Bonnie spat 'Well, I fed, professor. Lesson one complete.'

'You almost killed him, Bonnie.'

Bonnie glanced down at the floor and into Jeremy's frightened eyes which pulled her out of the trance she was in. Slowly, her eyes returned to their natural color and she began to shake profusely, falling to her knees, 'W-What am I doing?'

Damon stood up, 'Blondie, get Jeremy out of here. I've got Bonnie.'

'No!' Bonnie shook her head, moving away from him until she felt the cold, concrete wall behind her 'I have to- I need to go.'

Without another word, Bonnie sped out of the Grille covered in Jeremy's blood. She raced to her car and through every red light that dared to get in her way. She needed to put as much distance as possible between herself and the Grille. She ran in to the boarding house and up the stairs, two by two, making sure to avoid Stefan's curious glance as she made her way into Damon's bedroom, locking the door behind her. After spelling the room, she fell to the floor and sobbed. The tears wrecked through her as she cried for herself, for Elena, and for Jeremy.

She cried because she was a monster.

She cried because she almost killed him.

She cried because she didn't think that she would ever be able to come to terms with her vampirism.

Thirty minutes later, she heard Damon's boots against the floor as he walked down the hallway towards the bedroom, ignoring Stefan's spell of questions, 'Bonnie?' He called out to her gently from the other side of the bedroom door 'I know that you can hear me. Talk to me.'

She lifted the spell on the room and whispered, 'Damon, I can't do this.'

He leaned his forehead against the door, 'Yes, you can and you will.'

She brought her knees to her chest, banging against the floorboards with the palm of her hands, 'I can't. He was right. It's all my fault. I should've died in the prison world.'

'Don't you ever say that again.' He growled.

'I could've killed him!' She cried 'You don't understand.'

'And I have killed him!' Damon chuckled 'I've been a vampire for longer than you've been alive, Bon. Don't ever think I don't understand.'

'You don't! Just leave me alone.'

'Listen to me and listen to me well. I'm not leaving you alone. You made a mistake but it's not the end of the world. We can work through it.'

Bonnie grew silent, taking his words in to consideration, 'I'm scared, Damon.'

'You'd be a fool not to be but do you trust me?'

'I do.'

'Then trust that I will help you get through this and you will learn to control yourself. I just need you to trust me and let me in.' He pleaded with her.

Bonnie sighed, 'Okay.'

'Good,' Damon smiled, feeling accomplished 'I'm your spiritual guide, Bon-Bon.'

'Spiritual guide?' She giggled, wiping the tears from her face with the sleeve of her blouse.

'Yes. Now, open the door.'

When Bonnie opened the door, she wasn't expecting Damon to be standing there looking so... concerned. She smiled weakly as he opened his arms for an embrace and she sheepishly went into them. His scent filled her nostrils and she relaxed in his arms. The guilt she once felt was instantly replaced but something... more. She couldn't put her finger on but it warmed the pit of her stomach and she liked the feeling. Damon kissed the top of her head before pulling back, 'Good girl. Let's get you cleaned up before I decide to go take a bite out of Baby Gilbert, too.'

'Not funny, Damon,' She pouted 'I don't want to hurt people.'

'And you won't. It just takes time to learn your limits and how not to act off pure emotion. That's what I'm here for.' He said, as he walked around the corner and the sound of water running filled the air.

Bonnie thought about what he said for a moment before following him into the bathroom as the scent of her bubble bath filled the air, 'Thank you, Damon.'

He smiled at her, 'Why are you thanking me? I ran this for me but you are welcome to join me.' He wiggled his eyebrows.

She giggled, 'Please leave.'

'It's nothing that I haven't seen.'

She sighed in exasperation, 'I need this time to myself, Damon. No bathroom talks tonight.'

'Slumber party?' He asked, as she pushed him out of the bathroom and into the open space of the bedroom.

Bonnie looked at him and realized that, that may be the best thing for her right now, 'Yes. Give me 30 minutes and I pick the movie.'

'It's a deal.' He smirked, walking out of the bathroom and shutting the door behind him.

She stripped out of the filthy clothes, tearing them from her petite body and sunk into the scorching bath water, sighing with content, 'Thank you, Damon.'