Summary: some things really shouldn't be experimented with.

Soap

"What're you doin' here so late? Back to your house, come on lad."

Gobber's gentle nudge and kind tone stirred Hiccup awake. He'd fallen asleep at his desk in the smithy's back room again, his forehead rested upon his arms. Bleary-eyed, he blinked to dispel the mist that covered his vision. His drawing stick was still held between his left hand's fingers and he had carbon smudges on both hands.

Looking down at his unfinished sketch – a new weapon he was designing for himself – Hiccup let out a yawn and stood up, drowsily allowing Gobber to guide him home. He would have fallen asleep while climbing the stairs to his loft again, if it hadn't been for the cold temperature. Hiccup snuggled under his fur blankets and drifted off into sleep again.

He dreamed of finally taking down a dragon with his finished weapon. His life got so much better. His father recognized him. His peers admired him. Astrid returned his affections…

Hiccup woke up that morning with people yelling. He groaned, irritated. He'd gotten very little hours of sleep, judging by the headache now throbbing away at his temples. He was about to cover his ears to muffle the sounds, when he heard something that caught his attention.

"… Trader Johan, finally!"

Hiccup sprang out of bed almost immediately, nearly forgetting to put on his boots, headache now elapsed. He ran to the docks where everyone else was headed to with an unusual lightness to his steps, stopping briefly at the smithy only to gather some items he'd put aside for trade and the list of stuff he needed.

Due to that year's particularly nasty winter storms, Trader Johan hadn't docked in Berk in almost six months now. It was far too long for anyone to go without the man's novelties and supplies.

Hiccup was in dire need of ink, writing sticks, painting pencils, and some finer tools Gobber had no use for.

The line for the ship was long and bustling with excited people, all of them too happy to about the ship's arrival to actually bother getting into arguments about said line.

"Do not worry, my Hairy friends!" Trader Johan called out, "I will be staying here until the morrow, so you have plenty of time! Lucky for you, you're my favorite tribe in the entire Archipelago! Step right in, it' is a beautiful day for business!"

The line grew behind Hiccup. Occasionally some folks would greet him good morning, more out of courtesy than anything else. People made excited conversation and laughed about what a relief it was to finally be making their trades, while Hiccup was entirely focused on what items he would need for some of his projects.

In his distraction and amidst all the noise he barely noticed his peers arriving until Snotlout gave him a vigorous pat in the back.

"Hiccup, cousin! Buddy! How are you?"

"Hi guys…" Hiccup said, wary of the forced enthusiasm with which Snoutlout greeted hadn't been "buddies" since they were seven, at least.

"Thanks for saving that spot in line for us," Tuffnut said loudly so that the now-scowling adults would hear him. He gave Hiccup a thumbs-up and took the place right in front of the brunet.

Hiccup began to protest, but Ruffnut interrupted him. "Yeah, thanks man." And she, too, cut in front of him. Snotlout shoved the other two, placing himself at the lead of the group of teens. Even Fishlegs did it – though he at least had the decency to genuinely thank Hiccup.

Snotlout extended a hand to Astrid, signalling for her to come stand next to him in line. But she merely shook her head and crossed her arms, apparently unamused.

"I'm not cutting in front of all these people," she said irritably, gesturing to all the folks standing to their backs.

"We're not cutting in," Snotlout drawled, "we're just taking the spots that Hiccup kept for us!"

"Well, Hiccup hardly occupies one spot as it is…" Ruffnut bantered.

Astrid clicked her tongue impatiently and turned around to leave.

"Come on, babe! The sooner we get out of here, the more time you and I will have to –" Snotlout didn't finish his sentence due to having an axe suddenly pointed at his throat.

"Don't you even dare," she seethed. He didn't.

"You can take my place," Hiccup blurted out, blinking frantically. Astrid lowered the weapon.

"What?" She asked, her annoyed expression softening. "No, Hiccup. I won't."

"No no, really, it's okay!" Hiccup said, stumbling backwards – his arms were full of contraptions and he had a full satchel dangling from his shoulder – gesturing at the vacant spot with his head. "I bet you have a pretty busy day of… uh, training."

He really hoped Snotlout would have nothing to do with her day.

"You know, because I can tell you train a lot. Hard. Because you're really good. And all that." Hiccup tripped on his words a little, slightly nervous because of the way she was looking at him and also due to the twins' snickering.

"And I'm just… Hiccup, you know." He made a dismissive gesture with his shoulders and head. "It's my day off from the forge so yeah. Not really that busy. I can wait. See you."

As Hiccup walked away he could hear Snotlout saying, "You know Astrid, I was actually just about to offer you my spot too…"

When Hiccup finally arrived at the Great Hall the day was well in through the afternoon and he was famished, but pleased that he'd gotten so many goodies from trading.

He ate with unusual appetite – he hadn't even had time to break his fast that morning, after all – and when he was well and full, he intended to run off to the forge immediately to get more work done on his new project.

On his way back, Hiccup heard the twins roaring with laughter. And everyone knew that whenever the Thorstons laughed like that there was sure to be something going on. He followed the sound of pure mirth well past his house, into the border of the forest. The closer he got the more he could hear. Now Fishlegs and Astrid's voices joined in on the chorus of voices, further peaking his curiosity.

Everyone was laughing – except for Snotlout, who was bright red in the face and donned the most pissed-off look Hiccup could ever recall seeing. Hiccup could see why – Snotlout's hair was no longer black.

Instead it looked like a mixture of brown, orange and yellow, in a way similar to a tabby cat. A ver ugly, overgrown, hairy cat. And a very grumpy one at that.

Tuffnut dangled from a nearby tree branch with Snotlout's helmet firmly gripped in his hands, but he was convulsing so hard that he risked falling with each bout of chortles.

Even Hiccup had to bite back his lips, but a loud snort still escaped him. He immediately covered his mouth and nose to prevent being heard – he really didn't want Snotlout to pick him as a punching bag today – but luckily the twins were making too much noise for Hiccup's sound to be noticeable.

"I told you already, shut up!" Snotlout barked to everyone else. "Trader Johan gave me a crappy soap! I'm going to go back there and punch the living daylights out of him!"

Even Snotlout's threats seemed comical. By now, Ruffnut was rolling on the floor clutching at her sides, Fishlegs was doubled over and slumped against a tree, Tuffnut was just about to lose his balance and even Astrid had her elbow firmly clasped in front of her mouth, but Hiccup could see the tears welling in her eyes and the way her body twitched whenever she tried to take in breath.

Fed up with all the mockery, Snotlout finally kicked the tree – sending a still-laughing Tuffnut careening to the ground with a loud thump – and reclaimed his helmet, not before placing a well-aimed kick at Tuffnut's ribs. The blond Viking resumed his banter as soon as he got air back into his lungs though, and remained rolling about on the ground along with his sister.

Snotlout marched past Hiccup, tackling him with his shoulder on the way out. "What are you looking at," he growled, but Hiccup merely shook his head and shrugged, trying to seem as oblivious as possible.

Snotlout stomped away, cussing heavily. After he was out of earshot, Hiccup finally voiced out his amusement, but not as enthusiastically as the others.

"What happened?" Hiccup asked to anyone willing to answer. Ruffnut tried to reply, still breathless and trembling from the exertion, holding her aching red cheeks.

"Sn, Snotlout, he tried…" she breathed in, "to g-go blond…" she snorted in a very un-ladylike manner and covered her mouth, unable to proceed.

Tuffnut continuedin his sister's behalf, yelling out "He actually said that! He-he walked up t-to Astrid," Tuffnut stood up and tried to mimic Snotlout's face by tilting his head and pulling his lips into a quivering pucker, "Hey babe…."

He breathed in for further dramatic effect. "I've gone blond just for you." Tuffnut dropped to his knees and continued to laugh enthusiastically.

Fishlegs stepped in, waving his beefy hands in the air. "And then he took off his helmet and we see all of those colours!"

It took them a while to finally wipe out all their tears and set their faces straight. Even Hiccup's cheeks hurt – after all, he did stand there grinning like an idiot the whole time.

"What an idiot, that Snotlout!" Tuffnut said.

"Right?" his sister agreed, smirking. "Trying to impress Astrid with dyed hair… ha! Like that'd help. Right?" she said, this time to Astrid, nudging her.

"Yeah. At least that was a fun way to end the day," said Astrid, smiling. She quickened her pace and disappeared towards her house, not before adding, "I prefer brown hair anyway. See you guys!"

Hiccup nearly stopped on his tracks, Astrid's words rattling his brain. He told himself it was nothing, nothing at all, he was just overthinking it as usual... But he saw Fishlegs and the twins shoot him a silent, meaningful look.

END

A/N: Vikings prized blond hair very much - the darker the hair, the uglier they considered it.

Blond hair was one of their upmost standards of beauty, and even men used a special soap to dye their hair blond. Of course, the dye doesn't take as well on black hair... Hahaha. Poor Snotlout.

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