Author's note: I want you all to know that I read every one of your comments and I take them to heart. I know this story has spurred some very deep emotions in you. It's understandable. Just know, I have heard your concerns and I am trying very hard to address them.

I want to send out a HUGE thank you to my beta LavenderVanilla. She read through three versions of this chapter (two of them in the past week) to get it to the right place. You guys should really go check out her work because not only is she an amazing beta and friend, she's a great writer!

Thank you all for reading. I very much appreciate it. We are so close to the end of this and I hope you can start to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Happy reading!

Chapter Nineteen

Finnick sat up suddenly. He'd been dreaming that the house was burning down around them and they were all trapped inside. Sitting against the wall, he pulled the pillow tight to his chest and watched as Katniss and Prim slept. It took several minutes for his breathing to calm. His heart was still pounding in his chest, but the gentle rise and fall of Katniss's chest reminded him that it was all just a dream.

Katniss held Prim close, the younger girl's arms clung to her sister. After assuring himself that those two were fine, he got up to check on the others.

Starting in the front room, he saw Johanna pacing back and forth, glancing from one window to the next. She turned when she heard him come in the room.

"How does it look?" Finnick asked softly as he stepped toward the front window.

"All clear." Johanna whispered.

"Good." He turned to her. "You going to stay up all night?"

"Probably. I'm a light sleeper, though. From years of answering to my husband's every need."

Finnick gave her a sympathetic look. "How did you get away?"

She gave him a wicked smile. "The old bastard had a weak heart. And one day, he just fell over. And I never had to worry about him again after that."

He chuckled. "And now you keep an eye on Annie?"

She gave him a supportive half-smile. "You were important to me. I had to do something."

"I'm sure Annie appreciated having you around."

She shrugged. "I don't understand why you're such a big player in all this, but I knew I had to help. And I knew the best way to do that was to keep an eye on Annie."

He nodded. "After everything that was done to me, she was the one who kept me whole."

Johanna squeezed his arm. "I'm sorry, Finn. I wish there was something I could have done to keep you here."

Finnick sighed. "Nothing can change the past, but I'm here now."

"But for how long?"

"As long as Katniss and Prim need."

She walked back toward the front window. "I've got an eye on this place. Go back to bed."

He pulled her into a tight embrace before he went to the back of the house again. He looked in on Mags.

The old woman had fallen asleep in the third room after Annie insisted she stay close for the night. It had been far too late for her to make her way home. Mags snored softly, draped in an old quilt Finnick was sure she'd made forever ago. He stepped in and pulled the quilt up over her shoulders and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

He turned as he heard Adam cry out for a moment and then Annie's voice shushing him. Walking across to the door, he gently pushed it open just a crack. Annie held the baby to her breast. She slowly opened the window and stood beside it. "I don't know why your daddy left this closed. He likes to sleep with it open."

Peeta said softly, "Bring him here."

Annie turned and placed Adam in the center of the bed before she stretched out on the other side. Peeta was on the opposite edge. The parents each placed a hand on their baby, soothing him.

Annie whispered, "I think it's hard for him with so many extra people around."

"I know it's hard for you." Peeta whispered back.

Annie nodded.

"Don't worry," Peeta said, "I'll do all I can to keep it stable."

"You really need to talk to Katniss." Annie stroked Adam's cheek.

Peeta sighed. "I know. I'm trying to get her alone, but she's refusing."

"Maybe I can help you out. I'll offer to show Prim around and get Finnick reacquainted with his hometown." Annie suggested. She stroked Peeta's cheek. "I'll do what I can to help you the way you've helped me."

Finnick felt a sharp pain in his chest and quickly backed away. He shouldn't have listened in on their private conversation. He returned to the room he was sharing with Katniss and Prim for the night.

Katniss watched him walk back in the room.

"Go back to sleep, Katniss." He murmured as he stretched out on his mat beside the bed.

"Not if you're awake." She held her hand out toward him. "Need to hold my hand?"

Finnick slipped his fingers between hers. "Thanks."

"Figured you needed it." Katniss rubbed his hand with her thumb. "You're not okay."

"I'm not." He sat up and moved closer. "District Four isn't home anymore."

"When was the last time it was?" She asked softly.

He shrugged. "I don't want to make Prim travel more than she has to, though. We can stay at least a few more days."

"Annie offered us the apartment above the bakery." She looked away as Prim rolled to the opposite side of the bed. Dropping down onto the floor beside him, Katniss leaned her head on his shoulder. "There's a war coming. I don't intend to stay here and let it pass without doing something."

"What are you saying, Katniss?" He lifted her head and twisted. "You want to go fight?"

"Prim is safe here with Peeta and Annie. And Mags." She lifted her head. "Mags can continue teaching her about medicine." He held his hands tight. "If you want to come, you can. But I'm going with or without you."

He gave her an incredulous look. "What are you going to do? Shoot people with arrows?"

"Yeah." She scoffed. "I've never shot a gun before. And there are plenty of arrows I made on the way here. I can make more."

Finnick chuckled and kissed Katniss's knuckles. "Then I better find a spear."

She shook her head. "How much damage do you think you'll do with that?"

He shrugged. "Better than those guns. I can get them on the reload."

"And what if you get shot?"

"What if you do?" He gripped her hand. "We made a promise, Katniss. We're in this together.

She nodded. "We can see about some gun practice in the meantime. Maybe that will help."

He kissed her hand again. "Okay. No matter what, I'm coming with you."

Katniss looked toward her sister on the bed. "I did all this for her. And now I'm planning on leaving her with strangers."

"Mags and Johanna already adore Prim. They'll keep a good eye on her." Finnick promised.

She wrapped her arms around him. "Thank you."

He returned her embrace for a moment and then let go. Placing his hands on her waist, he hoisted her up. "Better get some sleep."

She looked at her sister on the bed and then back down at Finnick. "It's not fair that you're on the floor."

"I don't mind the floor. And neither you nor Prim need to be on the floor either."

She nodded and kissed the top of his head. "Sleep well."

"I'll try." He stretched out on his mat and stared at the ceiling until sleep finally overtook him.

Katniss removed Prim's arms from around her waist and sat up slowly. Finnick still slept on the floor, curled into a tight ball, his face pressed into the pillow. She dropped to the floor and put her hand on his shoulder. "It's okay, Finnick. It's just a dream."
Slowly, his limbs relaxed and he rolled to his back. His face held a hint of a smile.
As Katniss straightened up, she noticed Prim stretching on the bed. "Morning, Duck." Katniss said with a smile. "Want me to help you get dressed?"
"No, I can do it." Prim picked up her clothes and ducked behind the screen. "Do you think Annie will let me help her in the kitchen?"

Katniss smiled to herself. Prim had always liked making herself useful. "Of course. With a baby, I'm sure she'd take all the help you're willing to give." She tried to keep the bitter sound out of her mouth when she said "baby."

Finnick grumbled and rolled over, pressing his face into the pillow.

Prim stepped out from behind the screen buttoning her blouse. "Should we wake him?"

Katniss shook her head. "He didn't get much sleep on the road. Give him more time." She stepped behind the screen and changed out of the borrowed nightgown while Prim chattered softly on the other side.

Even though her words were positive, Katniss could still hear the melancholy in her sister's voice.

Katniss stepped out and smoothed a hand over Prim's hair. "Want me to braid your hair? I'll do it like Mama always does?"

Prim smiled and nodded. "Thanks. I'll do yours next."

Katniss worked with expert, quick hands. She braided Prim's hair and wrapped it up. She pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head before they switched places.

"I think I hear everyone else." Prim said. "I'm going to see if I can help." She practically skipped out of the room. It was good for her to have a purpose.

Katniss got up and followed her a few seconds later.

Peeta stepped out of his room with Adam in his arms. The baby let out a pathetic little cough and rubbed his face on Peeta's shoulder, letting out a soft whimper.

Katniss paused, looking on uncomfortably. "Is he unwell?"

Peeta shrugged. "Just a bit of a cough."

She stepped closer and raised a tentative hand to press against the baby's forehead. "He doesn't feel warm."

"I didn't think so either." Peeta pulled Adam away from his chest. "Will you listen to his lungs? I thought I heard a bit of a rattle."

Katniss looked between Peeta and the baby in his arms and then nodded. "Yes, I will." She gathered the baby into her arms and he pressed his face against her chest. He coughed again and then let out another whimper. "Oh, poor baby, I know." She carried him into the room they had just left and placed him on the bed. "Oh, I need my bag. I have a stethoscope in there."

Peeta left the room and Katniss leaned over Adam. He continued to cough, but he had a smile on his face as he reached for Katniss.

She smiled back. "Good morning, little one."

"Here." Peeta handed over the black bag. "Is that the right one?"

"Yes, thank you." Katniss took the bag and opened it. "Now, let's see if we can listen to those lungs, Adam." She put the stethoscope to her ears and pressed the other end to his chest. He looked up at her in confusion until she crossed her eyes, which made the baby laugh.

"You're good with babies." Peeta pointed out from beside the door.

Katniss shrugged. "After a while you figure out the things that make them comfortable." She moved the instrument over the baby's chest and then rolled him over. She sat back and lifted him up into her arms. "I hear a small rattle, but I don't think it's anything to be concerned about. I can mix up something, though, if you want." She passed Adam back, but he started crying and reached out for Katniss.

Peeta chuckled. "He doesn't normally warm up to people so quickly."

Katniss smiled. "He must see something in me."

"The same thing his father sees, I'm sure." Peeta stepped close and held Adam out again.

Katniss blushed slightly at the comment as she put the stethoscope away. She gathered the baby close to her chest. "What is it with you, little one?" She didn't like the look of adoration on Peeta's face, so she walked past with Adam cuddled up against her. It was too much like all those years before. She wasn't ready to tackle that subject, especially when she was holding his son.

In the kitchen, Johanna was nowhere to be seen, but the three other women were busy getting all the components of breakfast complete.

Peeta stepped in behind Katniss and rested a hand on Annie's back. He explained softly, "Katniss says it's a little rattle, but nothing to worry about."

Annie looked over to Katniss with a relieved smile. "Thank you so much, Katniss. I was a little worried."

"I'm sure Mags could have diagnosed it just as easily. Or Prim." Katniss handed Adam to his mother, but again he whined and reached for Katniss. "You should be with your mama."

"Do you like Katniss?" Annie asked softly.

Peeta chuckled. "I think he does."

Prim piped up, "All the babies love Katniss. Most grown people don't, but babies always do. I wonder why it's like that."

Katniss knew exactly why, but Prim never had to worry about it. "I inherited too much from Daddy for most grown people to like me. Babies don't see those parts of a person." She reluctantly gathered Adam into her arms. "Tell me all your secrets, little one." She sat down in the nearest chair and bounced Adam on her knee.

Peeta watched her curiously from across the table. Katniss tried to ignore him, but she couldn't. He was so handsome. In the last several years he'd grown into his features a bit more. He looked so much like his father. She was thankful for it. She would hate to have to look at Maureen's features any more than necessary.

Mags announced, "Breakfast is ready."

"I'll wake Finnick." Prim offered. She left the room.

Peeta moved closer. "I can take him back."

"I'm fine." Katniss said, smoothing a hand over Adam's hair. "Really."

Peeta nodded and remained in his seat, watching her with his baby.

Adam started to fuss and Katniss pulled him close, singing softly in his ear. Annie joined in a little more loudly. The rest of the group started to sing as well. It was a very homey feeling to have that all around, even though Katniss knew there was no way it could last.

Finnick awoke to Prim shaking his shoulder and whispering, "It's time to wake up."

He heard the rest of the house already in motion. It reminded him a little of the apartment building where he and Katniss had lived for all those years. No wonder he slept through it. "Okay, Prim. I'll be out in a minute."

As Finnick dressed, he heard Adam fuss and cough. He heard Annie's lofty voice rising above the chatter as she sang a soothing song.

He smiled as other voices joined in. Peeta was first. His voice was deeper than Finnick expected. It was soon followed by Mags, her tones were reedy, but confident. Prim giggled before joining.

Adam finally started to calm.

Finnick stepped into the small kitchen, made even smaller by so many people. Katniss held Adam, looking at him as curiously as he looked at her. The baby let out a little cough and she patted his back, speaking soft soothing words close to his ear.

"Good morning." Finnick said, sitting down to make a plate from the offerings in the middle of the table.

Annie smiled at him. "Good morning. How did you sleep?"

"It was all right." Finnick smirked and rubbed his neck. "Pillow was a little lumpy."

Peeta laughed. "We'll try to find you something better next time."

Katniss shook her head. "The pillows were fine." She assured Peeta. "They were flat in Twelve."

Prim made a face. "Don't remind me. Even after I stole your pillow it wasn't any better."

Finnick smiled around his mouthful of bacon and eggs. "At least you had a second one. Katniss took mine half the time."

"I did not." Katniss chuckled. "I even gave you mine when you were on the floor sometimes."

"When you started warming up to me." Finnick grinned.

Prim held out her arms to Adam. "Can I hold him?"

The baby laughed and waved his arms. He babbled as Katniss passed him to her sister's lap. Finnick caught a hint of longing on Katniss's face. Looking between the baby and his father, Finnick could see what Katniss did. The eyes were a similar shade of blue with just a hint of green around the edges. Adam's smile yielded the same dimples that were on Peeta's cheeks.

Finnick got Katniss's attention and gave her a sympathetic smile.

Peeta wiped his face and stood. "I need to get back to the bakery." He handed his plate to Annie and the pair shared a quick kiss.

An annoyed sound left Katniss's throat and the couple broke apart, contrite. There was distress on Peeta's features and he muttered something under his breath. Annie stepped toward the sink.

Finnick watched as Annie's cheeks turned red and embarrassment filled her features. Peeta ran his fingers through his hair and gave Katniss a pleading look.

"Peeta, don't." Katniss said as she stood.

Peeta stepped closer to her. "I didn't mean—"

"Just don't." Katniss cut him off.

Finnick reached up and grabbed her hand. "Katniss?"

Katniss pulled her hand away. "I need to go." She started for the door.

Peeta stepped in front of her and asked softly, "You want to come help me in the bakery later?"

Katniss sighed, looking around at the room full of people. She'd never been one to cause a scene. "I don't know. I was never really welcomed in the bakery before."

"You're always welcome in mine." Peeta assured her. "Every inch of it."

A smile started to spread on her lips, but she quickly pushed it away. "I'll think about it."

Finnick slipped beside Katniss and held out his hand. "Would you like to take a walk with me? I want to show you something."

Katniss nodded, refusing his hand as she led him out the door.

His hand itched for hers, for the comfort that she was really there walking with him. He hurt just as much as her at witnessing the kiss Peeta and Annie had shared. Probably didn't help that he'd gathered Annie into his arms just moments after.

After walking along for several minutes, he stopped beside the opening of the cave and leaned against it. "Right where I remembered."

Katniss looked around in confusion. "What's going on, Finnick?"

With a heavy sigh, Finnick motioned to the opening. "This was where Annie and I used to come to be alone." He crossed his arms, wishing his heart wouldn't clinch so hard. "Her daddy was a drunk, always around. Passed out about half the time."

She moved to the rock wall beside him. "That must have been hard for her."

He nodded. "We first met on the beach when we were younger, a little older than kids. She was digging for clams. She was angry, talking to herself." He smiled sadly. "I just wanted to get away from my uncle. It was just after he sold me the first time. I felt dirty and I wanted to swim until my arms gave out so I'd never have to do that again."

Katniss let out a soft gasp. It had been a while since he'd talked about any of this. His throat was tight and the ocean was drowned out by the sound of his heart beating in his ears.

But her soft voice broke through the chaos. "Finnick?" She moved closer, slipping her arm around his waist. "You okay?"

"I'll be fine." He took a steadying breath. "She looked at me and I saw all the anger I felt. And I snapped at her. She snapped back." He sighed and dropped his arms, stepping away and standing in the water up to his ankles. "I waded out into the water. And I did plan on going until I just…" He turned. "There was a riptide that I got tangled in. And Annie saved me. This little slip of a thing towed me back to shore and sat with me until I was rested enough."

"Finnick," she said again, touching his arm. "She saved you. And now I think it's time you save the world for her. For her son."

"You'll do it for Prim."

"And for Peeta." She added.

Finnick looked her over critically. "Really, Katniss?"

Katniss shrugged. She leaned into him and pressed her eyes into his shoulder. "I have to believe I'm doing the right thing for all of us, but especially for him."

"I know, Katniss." He wrapped her in a tight embrace and kissed her temple. "I think you are. We are." He rubbed her back and kissed her cheek. "You know I love you?"

She tilted her head back. "Finnick…"

He looked at her a moment before he pressed his mouth down against hers. She allowed it for just a moment before she stepped away, shaking her head.

"I never wanted us to be like that." She said.

"I know." He grabbed her hand. "I just want you to know that I'll do all I can to keep you alive. If only for us to run away together once this war blows over. We'll make a life together. Us and Prim."

"Thank you." She squeezed his hand. "Do you know how to fire a gun?"

He nodded. "I had a… Well, let's just say, I was taught by a really good sharpshooter." She'd paid for a month of his company and got bored of the bedroom quickly.

She gave him a sympathetic look. "I'm sure Johanna could find you something. I need to make a quiver to hold all my arrows. And make more arrows." She started back up the beach and Finnick followed.

Peeta was pacing the kitchen when they got back to the house. He combed his hands through his hair but paused when Katniss and Finnick came through the door.

Peeta said, "Annie took everyone with her to the bakery. Even Prim."

Katniss nodded.

"I'll head into town and see if I can help." Finnick headed back out.

Katniss reached out for him. "No, Finnick, don't."

Finnick gave her a firm shake of his head and pushed her hand away. "Peeta can bring you to meet us in a little bit." He walked out the door, pausing to give Peeta an understanding look. They needed this and Finnick knew that.

Katniss looked toward the sink to see if she could wash some dishes to keep herself busy, but it was empty. All other tasks she could think of were done too. She finally looked back to Peeta's patient, conflicted eyes.

"Please talk to me." He said softly.

She looked down. "Every little thing I could have ever imagined…" She looked up again. "I missed you. I shouldn't have expected you to wait for me. The way you are, the way Finnick told me Annie was, should have been enough to keep me away. But I had to see for myself." She heaved a sigh. "Adam is adorable and looks healthy and he is so loved." She swallowed. Her voice was thick when she said, "He's so lucky to have you for his father. He'll be raised right."

He grabbed her hands and begged, "Katniss, don't tell me you're leaving."

"You and I both know Finnick and I can't stay." She looked down at his hands. The heat was the same as she remembered. They were soft and strong as they held hers. "Finnick and I are intruders in your life."

"You're not." He kissed her knuckles. "You can stay. You can help in the bakery. Or help Mags. I'm sure she'd appreciate it. And Finnick was a fisherman before, right?"

"Not always." She said softly, avoiding his face as much as possible. Looking at him was painful because his eyes were so full of affection that she didn't feel belonged to her anymore.

Peeta cupped her cheek to turn her face back up. "I love you so much, Katniss. And I'm going to make sure you know that for as long as you decide to stay."

Katniss felt the tears stinging her eyes as he stroked his thumb across her skin. "It won't be long." Why did it hurt her so much to say that?

"Then I'll show it starting now." He pulled her outside around the back of the house.

She recognized the arrow-shaped leaves of the plant before he pointed them out. Katniss. Dropping down close to them she rubbed her fingers over one of the leaves.

"I found them here a few weeks ago. Mags said I should take them out because they become invasive, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. It would be like losing you all over again."

She sat back, staring at the plant in wonder. "Daddy told me quite often that as long as I could find myself I'd never go hungry." She looked up. "I find them every time I'm out so I know where to find them if I ever need them."

He kneeled down beside her. "I remember you telling me." He placed his hand on her back and she allowed it just for a moment before pulling away. "It had been raining here for days and days. I don't know what brought it here, but there it was."

She nodded and stood, dusting the dirt off of her skirt. "Peeta, I…"

He stood and rubbed his hands down her arms and back up. "I understand why you think you should move on. If it were me in your shoes, I probably wouldn't be able to stick around much either."

"I don't want to just run away." She swallowed and stepped closer. "I missed you so much."

"I missed you." He breathed. "I know it doesn't seem like it, but I did the best I could."

"You thought you'd never see me again."

"It shouldn't be an excuse." He leaned his forehead against hers. "You are worth so much more respect than that and I feel horrible."

"We won't worry about the things we should or shouldn't have done. We made our choices and there's no changing them now." She smiled. "And there would be no Adam." She stepped away. "Will you show me your bakery?"

Peeta offered his arm to Katniss and she stared at it a moment before slipping her hand around it. He led the way, speaking excitedly about his operation as he led her into town.